Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
REECE
B ooker never came to find me after the disaster of his brother turning up and my having a breakdown on his front porch.
I could still feel his arms banded around me, the safety I’d felt as he held me. I’d never had that with anyone else. Never had the certainty that nothing could reach me when this man would willingly stand in the way.
But then he’d avoided me for the rest of the day. I hadn’t caught a single glimpse of him, and given that the new mare in the barn needed so much attention right now, he had to be working hard to achieve that.
My feelings for Booker weren’t the only surprising thing to come out of yesterday, though. I hadn’t realized how much my ex still affected me. That the mere thought of him being here could elicit that amount of fear in me.
I thought I was in a better place in my head. That the distance I’d put between us had given me the perspective I needed to assess the things I’d been through and accept that it was a season in my life I was leaving behind.
But it wasn’t as far behind me as I’d tried to tell myself.
And I needed to make that happen.
Because something had happened yesterday when Booker held me in his arms. When he’d whispered in my ear that he had me. It was the single most hard-hitting truth that anyone had ever told me.
And something had shifted inside me.
But what did that mean for me and Booker? Was there even a Booker and me to begin with?
So I made a decision.
I washed my breakfast dishes quickly and then pushed my feet into my sneakers. Booker might be avoiding me, but there was one thing he couldn’t avoid that was happening today. The vet was scheduled to check in on the new mare today.
Apparently, I wasn’t above ambushing a guy and forcing him to talk about his feelings. And if there was ever a guy who needed to be forced to address his feelings, it was Booker Farrington.
I was out the door before I could even consider if this was a good idea. I didn’t even let myself think about whether I was ready to confront my own feelings. All I could think about was getting to him.
My feet skidded on the gravel as I turned the corner into the barn and then slowed my steps as the two men in front of me looked up in surprise.
“Morning,” I chirped, trying to pretend that nothing unusual was happening.
“Morning,” the guy I didn’t know responded. Presumably, he was the vet Booker usually worked with.
The man in question was leaning against a closed stable door, his arms crossed, and the brim of his hat pulled low enough that I couldn’t see the scowl I already knew was on his face. It was actually kind of endearing now. When Booker was scowling, all was right in the world. It would only be when he lost that expression and didn’t look like he cared anymore that I’d be worried.
The vet looked over his shoulder at Booker when he didn’t say anything and then shrugged. “I’m Cole Harrison,” he said, smiling at me. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Reece Graham.” I reached out and shook the hand that he extended to me.
Cole moved over to the stable and quietly slipped inside. “Hey there, beautiful,” he murmured, reaching out a hand to the mare, who watched him carefully.
“She’s been really quiet since she got here,” I told him. “I don’t know if that’s a good sign. I’m kinda new when it comes to horses. But Booker is teaching me.”
Cole stroked the mare’s nose, and she blinked slowly, her tail flicking to the side. “You’re a sweet girl, aren’t you?” he crooned. “But you’ve been through a lot.”
He ran his hands over her back, careful not to touch any of the sores. Booker had treated them with antiseptic the day she arrived, but they still looked bad.
“Has she put any weight on since she arrived?” Cole asked, looking up.
He wasn’t looking at me, and when I glanced over my shoulder, I saw Booker had moved to stand behind me.
“Only about ten pounds,” Booker told him. “She’s still on the alfalfa every four hours. We’re four days in, but I’d hoped she’d gain quicker than she is.”
“She’s chewing okay? Drinking enough?”
“Yep.”
Cole stepped back and frowned. “I’d recommend introducing some calorie heavy feeds to see if we can step up the weight gain. Let’s alternate for now, but don’t increase her alfalfa until you’re sure she’s tolerating the new feed.”
Booker hummed in agreement, and Cole took a step back, frowning before going to a box of supplies and pulling out a stethoscope.
“Damn,” I heard Booker mutter under his breath. “I was really hoping you didn’t think that as well.”
Cole shook his head sadly and then listened to the mare’s stomach carefully.
“What? What’s wrong?” I asked.
I could feel a sense of panic building. Especially when Cole sighed sadly, his shoulders drooping.
“She’s in foal,” he said, stepping back and shaking his head.
Cole made some notes on a clipboard.
Booker moved to the mare, running a hand over her muzzle.
I felt so out of the loop here. A complete novice with no idea of how to help, and I hated it.
“Try getting some fat-added feed into her diet as soon as she’s balanced out. I know I don’t need to warn you, but I’d be remiss not to remind you to keep an eye out for re-feeding syndrome.” Cole finished writing and shoved his pen in his box before he packed up his things. “She’s good for an antibiotic wash over those sores, and I’d like you to get her hooves trimmed as soon as you can. She’s calm enough that it’s not going to be overly stressful for her.”
Booker hummed in agreement and walked out of the stable, closing the door behind him. I was left standing in the middle of the barn, silently watching the people who could actually help her.
“It was nice to meet you, Reece. I’ll be around in the next few days, but call me if you need anything, Booker.”
Cole and Booker shook hands, and then Booker walked him out to his car. I’d never felt as alone as I did right then.
A soft gust of warm breath tickled the back of my neck, and I turned to see the mare with her head over the stable door for the first time since she’d arrived here.
“Hey there, girl,” I whispered, turning to her and running a hand over her soft muzzle. “I’m so sorry this is happening to you.”
She nudged me gently with her nose, and a sad laugh bubbled out of me. “You getting ready to eat already? Hey, that’s got to be a good sign.”
“It is,” Booker said from behind me.
I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I’d been filled with all these plans of making him talk about yesterday, but in the grand scheme of things, it didn’t feel all that important now. Not when we were standing here trying to figure out if we could save the sweet girl in front of us.
“She’s going to lose the foal, isn’t she?” I asked.
Booker sighed, and I felt him move closer, the heat of his body warming my back. “She will. We just have to hope we don’t lose her with it. Her body can’t sustain them both, but it’s going to try.”
“There isn’t any way?”
I wanted him to reassure me. To tell me it was all going to be all right. I already knew he was a man who’d fight for what was right, and I didn’t think he’d ever lie to me. If I could just get Booker to tell me we could save them both, then everything would be okay.
“I’ll get her hay net,” he said softly. “I need to work out her new feeding regime, but then I’ll talk you through it,” he said instead.
It felt like a sign. Like the loss of the foal hanging over us symbolized more than us failing the mare I’d come to love. It felt like the beginning of an end.
But I was done giving up on the things I wanted.
I was done letting life drag me down and then kick me for good measure.
Maybe I was setting myself up for a broken heart.
Maybe I was trying to save more than just this little horse.
It didn’t matter.
I was going to save us all.
I heard Booker coming back with the hay net and asked, “Do you have a computer I can borrow?”
He hesitated for a second, reaching around me and securing the net at the stable door. “I’ve got an old laptop you can borrow. It’s old and slow, but it works. Wi-Fi should reach the cottage.”
“Good.”
He turned around then, leaning against the side of the stable and crossing his arms again as he watched me carefully. “What are you up to?”
“I’m going to find a way to save her.”
I could already tell from his eyes that he was trying to let me down gently. To explain to me that the world just didn’t work that way.
“Don’t,” I said. “Don’t tell me it’s not possible. Just help me find a way.”
Booker’s tongue ran across his bottom lip as he weighed his options, and then finally, he nodded. “Fine. But if you’re going to save her, then you’d better give her a name. Doesn’t feel right to keep calling her, ‘her.’”
“Will you show me how to clean her sores, too? Show me everything.”
He nodded, pushing away from the barn. “Let’s get to work.”