Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
How had Diana shifted so damn seamlessly from one-and-done to essentially living with a guy?
It could not possibly be this easy.
Or maybe it was, which was why her grandmother and mother and sister had so easily tripped from this stage to marriage. Over and over again.
The good thing, she supposed, was that Amil did not seem inclined to push her any further or faster than she was willing to go.
He didn’t ask for a relationship status, he didn’t suggest they make this arrangement permanent—despite the fact that it was far more comfortable than she would have expected.
Hell, the man didn’t even leave his toothbrush in the holder on the sink. He tucked the toothbrush back into his toiletry bag, like he knew she might freak out if he presumed this was anything beyond temporary.
She tried to tell herself that he was right. She would freak out.
She should be freaking out over this much togetherness. Six nights. Seven days.
The 49ers game was tomorrow, and so far, they had managed to keep Jalen from figuring out that Amil had essentially moved in with her.
And was banging her senseless every night. And often in the morning, when he returned from his jogs.
Jogs with Jalen.
It felt so dirty. Yet when she was in the moment, it felt so right, so, yeah, she was a tad frustrated with the whole thing.
Not enough to stop, though.
Every morning, Amil went jogging with Jalen and Callahan, who, Amil told her when he returned on Wednesday morning, was trying to figure out how to break up with his girlfriend.
At least Diana was reassured they weren’t talking about her. They were too busy dissecting Callahan’s love life, apparently.
Wednesday evening after practice, Amil went to see the condo that was three doors down from Jalen’s unit. Diana was not invited.
When she pressed him for information later that night, he said it was okay.
No other details.
She knew it was more than okay. She’d helped Callahan secure his unit in that building, so she knew damn well how nice those condos were.
“I don’t think I want to live in a condo,” Amil finally admitted. Just to her. To Jalen, he was hedging, claiming to be considering it.
She couldn’t help but wonder if what he really didn’t want was to live three doors down from Jalen. Not because he didn’t want to live near his buddy, but because of her.
She was the damn snarl in the whole mess. Without her mucking things up, Amil fitting in with his new team would be going so much more smoothly.
“What are you thinking about?” Amil asked after rinsing his toothbrush and tucking it into his toiletry bag.
She stood next to him in front of the bathroom mirror, pretending to focus on sweeping eyeliner across her lid so that she wouldn’t blurt out, “Just put the damn thing in the holder.” It wasn’t like there wasn’t plenty of room. There was a lone toothbrush resting in that cup.
And it wasn’t like he wasn’t going to come in here later tonight and use the damn toothbrush again—
Okay, technically, he was not.
They were flying down to Santa Clara in a few hours. Spending the night. Playing the 49ers tomorrow afternoon.
“Wondering what you are thinking about,” she finally admitted.
“I’m currently trying to determine if we have enough time for a quicky before we head to the airport.”
She snorted and damn near took her eye out with the eyeliner pencil. “How about beyond that? Are you nervous about the game tomorrow? What about the fact that you’re going to be in your hometown tonight?”
“I’m always nervous about the next game, and Santa Clara was never my hometown. It was just a place I lived while I played for the 49ers.”
She pursed her lips and glared at him through the mirror. While a small part of her liked hearing that he did not consider Santa Clara home, he was evading the real question.
Just like always with Amil, he knew when to push and when to reel it in. “Yes, I’m nervous. The Mountain Lions are my family now, and I want us to win. And yes, the win will be a little sweeter because it’s against my previous team.”
It warmed her heart when he said things like the Mountain Lions are my family now. They were hers, too, and she was damn proud of this team. And all the players.
Especially Amil.
“Any movement on your house there?” she asked while she dressed, while Amil tucked his toiletry bag into his duffle.
“My stuff has been moved to a storage unit. A cleaning crew just went through it this week. The sign is supposed to go in the front yard on Monday.”
They cuddled with the cats. Fed them extra treats. Slipped out into the hall and headed downstairs. The team rented a private jet for these flights, and they flew out of a smaller airport rather than PDX.
They’d decided to drive to the airport together, but once inside, they’d keep their distance. Diana would go hang with the admin staff or the WAGs, while Amil would sit with his teammates.
“Sounds like you need to make a decision on the condo,” she noted as he guided his truck toward the airport.
“We should go look at houses next week. So I have something to compare it to.”
Fair enough. He’d initially said he wanted to buy a house, so this idea made sense.
Except he’d said we. “I’ll text you my friend’s number. The one who is a real estate agent.”
He gave her a quick side-eye before returning his focus to the road. “Are you telling me you don’t want to go with me?”
“No. I just…” She just what?
She just didn’t know what to think. Yes, she’d offered to help him when he first joined the team, but so much had changed in the short time since then. Suddenly, her joining him on his house hunting expedition felt incredibly intimate.
He didn’t press. He parked the truck. He unloaded their bags from the back.
He didn’t pull her bag along behind him like he had when they left the condo.
Because they weren’t together.
The crazy part was, if Jalen weren’t so up in his head about her, it wouldn’t matter.
Yes, her friends and his teammates would give them shit about being together, but it would be good-natured.
Allison and Emma would be thrilled. They both felt her one-night only stance was ridiculous, that despite her family’s curse, she deserved happiness as much as the next person.
She knew many of his teammates would consider her a catch, so they’d probably be impressed by the speed with which he’d managed to capture her attention. Or maybe not, since most of them were aware that she and Amil had hooked up two years ago. Maybe they’d simply think it was meant to be.
Who knew?
“Hey, you two!”
Diana glanced over at Emma, Allison, and Dante strolling across the parking lot and immediately felt her tense muscles relax.
The five of them headed into the airport together, the three women out front, chatting like the old friends they were, while Dante and Amil took up the rear. None of them questioned what she and Amil had been doing together in the parking lot.
They’d likely assumed they’d bumped into each other, just like they’d bumped into Emma and Allison and Dante.
Everything was fine, and she needed to quit worrying. Amil had convinced Jalen there was nothing going on between them. So long as they kept things on the down-low, everything would continue to be fine.
So why did she suddenly, while standing in the TSA line, have an epiphany that she did not want to keep things on the down-low?
She, of all people.
Hell, she had been steadily refusing to have the relationship status conversation. Amil wouldn’t put his toothbrush in her holder because of her issues. The family curse.
The curse that, for the first time in her adult life, she wondered whether it was simply poor judgment. Falling into a pattern and refusing to change. Hell, hadn’t that been her, until Amil came along?
In her case, it was a good thing. None of the other men she’d hooked up with were worthy of a second time—and certainly not of moving into her condo.
Was it possible that her mother and sister and grandmother simply hadn’t found Mr. Right yet? And once they did, they’d change their own patterns?
Oh God, did she believe Amil was her Mr. Right?
She stumbled, probably would have taken a header into the cement floor if Amil had not grabbed her arm and kept her upright.
Luckily, Allison, Emma, and Dante also reached for her, so it didn’t look questionable to the rest of the team, waiting to board the plane.
And yes, she was officially sick of being so damn paranoid.
Not that she could do a damn thing about it.
Except put some distance between her and Amil.
Which turned out to be easy at this juncture. He and Dante headed toward their teammates while she and Allison and Emma went to sit with Jillian and Morgan and Kate, Broderick’s wife, who was traveling without their children.
Jillian cracked a joke that every time they traveled without their children, Kate ended up pregnant.
Kate laughed. “Doubtful on this trip,” she said.
“We aren’t even sharing a hotel room. Coach is being super strict with their time.
Wants to make sure they are 100 percent ready to win tomorrow.
” She grinned. “You know what that means. We’re on our own in the San Francisco Bay area for the evening! ”
She high-fived each woman in turn. Diana offered up what she hoped was an enthusiastic smile.
She loved hanging with her girls. Most of her positive memories had occurred while she was bonding with her girlfriends.
San Francisco was a fun city. She knew she’d have a fantastic time, especially with this crew.
So why did she feel so damn melancholy?