Chapter 20
Chapter Twenty
“You’re drunk.”
That was how Amil greeted Diana after she slipped into his room and closed the door behind her.
“I am,” she assured him. “Luckily, we’ve been banging sober for, like, ever, so you have no moral obligation to turn me down.”
But just in case he was considering it—because her guy was nothing if not overly considerate—she flipped off the neon pink netting covering her sports bra.
Fumbled when she started to unlatch the button on her micro mini-skirt.
“What’s wrong?” Amil asked, tuned in, as ever, to her every move. Every emotion.
“I just thought of you as my guy,” she admitted, because she was drunk and her gatekeeper wasn’t working properly. Or, hell, maybe she was just tired of pretending she didn’t care as much as she really did.
Amil slipped an arm around her waist and hauled her up against his hard and nearly naked body. Her own began humming immediately.
“I like being your guy,” he mumbled against her neck before nipping at her ear.
She moaned.
“We have to be quiet,” he said, his voice pitched low. It was all rumbly and sexy and doing all sorts of tingly things to her nether region.
“Broderick is next door, and I know for a fact that Kate is in there with him.”
Diana giggled. “I know. She’s the one who gave me the idea. Also, there’s a good chance there will be a baby number four next summer.”
Amil leaned back to peer down at her. “You told Kate about us?”
She shook her head so vigorously the hair-sprayed curls slapped her in the face. “Good God, no. I haven’t even told Emma and Allison. Our secret is very safe with me.”
He frowned. She pushed up onto her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to each corner of his mouth. “Turn that frown upside down,” she teased.
The frown didn’t go away. Amil did, though. He stepped out of the embrace, adjusted his junk with a grimace.
“I have a cure for that, you know,” she suggested.
He shook his head. “I don’t want to be your dirty little secret anymore.”
“What?” Where was this coming from? What had happened since they parted ways before boarding the flight to Santa Clara?
Everything had been peachy keen. Better than. They were both happy. She wasn’t freaking out about her curse.
What the hell was going on?
“I want more, Diana. I want it all. Hell, I don’t even want to move out of your tiny condo.
You want the truth? I love the condo in Jalen’s building.
But I don’t want to buy it, because I don’t want you to not be in my life.
In every single aspect of my life. And I know that will happen if I move three doors down from Jalen. ”
He grabbed his hair with both hands. “Fuck. I can’t believe I just said all that.”
She couldn’t either, although if she were being honest with herself, she already knew this. Most of it.
She was fully aware that he’d caught feelings. That he was holding himself in check. That he was doing what he needed to do to not scare her off.
He probably figured she’d come around…eventually. And he was okay with waiting.
Which made it easier for her to fall into this little unspoken relationship with him. Because, yeah, she liked it too. She had no interest in stepping away from what they had going—but she needed time to come to terms with it.
Because that curse was still out there, hovering, whispering in her ear that if she did move this to the next level, they’d be married and divorced within a year.
She had to catch up with her mother and sister, after all.
“Amil, don’t do this,” she pleaded. “Let’s just start over, okay? We’ll pretend it’s our first time.” She forced out a laugh. “I mean, this is the same hotel, isn’t it?”
“Yeah,” he responded, sounding hollow. “And I don’t want to start over. It took us two years to reconnect after that first time.”
“I know, but look where we are now.” She offered up a blinding smile, silently willing him to forget this heart-to-heart talk that they were well overdue for. Everything was so much easier when they kept the emotions at bay.
“I am looking at it. And I don’t like it. I want more, Diana.”
She rubbed her suddenly throbbing temple. “I can’t give you more, Amil.” Not right now. Eventually, maybe.
Hopefully.
But not right now. She was still too scared.
Of herself. Of what she felt for him.
“Then I think you should go to your own room.”
She dropped her hands to her sides and stared at him. He gave her a remorseful look in return.
“Amil…”
He shook his head. “I can’t, Diana. I’m sorry.”
She stared at the ceiling. Why were her eyes stinging? She needed to get out of there before that sting started trailing down her cheeks.
“Fine,” she said on a self-preserving huff. She charged to the door, slipping out into the hall.
She turned toward the elevators and saw Jalen, standing in the middle of the hall, one arm wrapped around an ice bucket.
Well, hell.
With nothing left to lose, she stalked down the hall in his direction, head held high, fully aware that there were tears streaking down her cheeks and she’d left her cover-up in Amil’s room, so she looked half-naked.
She brushed past Jalen without acknowledging him.
“What the hell, Diana?”
She kept walking. Didn’t turn around. Went straight to the end of the hall, to the door leading to the stairs, instead of waiting for the elevator, which would give Jalen the chance to catch up to her and try to talk to her.
She had nothing to say to him.
She had nothing to say to anyone.
The next morning, she woke with a raging headache, a broken heart, and no text messages or missed calls from Amil.
She lay in bed, clutching her phone, staring at the last text conversation they’d had. A conversation about the cats that had turned into funny cat memes they sent back and forth.
She wanted to text him, but what the hell did she say? She’d happily apologize if it would put them back to where they were before she went to his hotel room last night. If they could pick up where they left off when they exited his truck in the parking lot at the airport.
But what if he said no again? What if he still insisted she give him more than she was ready to give?
Why the hell couldn’t he have continued to wait for her? Damn it, she’d probably get there…eventually.
Huffing out a groan, she rolled out of bed and headed for the shower. She had to catch the bus to the stadium. Do her job.
They had a game to win.
She could sort out her love life—or lack thereof—later.