Chapter 1
THE PROS AND CONS OF US
Sienna Cole:
I might throw up. Or kill Kamryn. Honestly, if I leave now, no one will know.
Walking up to Lawson Bennet feels like slow-motion torture replaying on a movie screen in my head.
I want to be completely and fully able to walk up to him without a hitch.
But he’s a football player which is making it inevitably painstaking.
I’m physically incapable of talking to football players anymore. Not after everything.
Kamryn Hart is my best friend. We’ve been close for all of our years at Seattle Pike University which is nearing four as a duo.
Kamryn wants a career in sports medicine so during our freshman year she interned with the lacrosse team which pushed us together as best friends.
She’s the only person I take advice from in any avenue.
She is also far more in touch with her physical wants and needs than I am.
It’s easy for her to hook up and never speak to the guy again.
Whereas I’ve never had a hookup, I’ve never thought about having one.
That is until Kamryn suggested it to me on the way here.
Football players have always been the bane of my existence since high school.
I’m not one for holding grudges but this is one I won't let go for a plethora of reasons, even when they are as hot as Lawson.
So I’m currently imagining every horrible possibility from me somehow spontaneously bursting into flames before I get a word out.
Maybe vomiting on him. Or even worse, he could actually talk to me long enough that I need to entertain a conversation with him.
But there’s nowhere else to turn. I’ve approached him, and he’s looking at me, and I’ve never noticed how pretty his gray eyes are.
The song Slut Me Out by NLE Choppa is playing in true college fashion.
Is this the soundtrack to our possible one-night romance? That seems… dangerous.
“Hi,” Lawson Bennet says, best friend of star quarterback Bellamy Archer, and a very obvious flirt.
He’s known for his extracurriculars and no I’m not talking about football, which makes him the opposite of his golden retriever style best friend.
Lawson’s voice is deep. Low, and sultry.
His hair is blondish brown, and long, it slightly curls up at the end.
He has a small hoop in his nose, which showcases exactly why I shouldn't be talking to him. Guys with nose piercings are always a bad idea. Very hot, almost irresistible, but always bad. There’s a light bit of scruff on his jawline, and his chin.
He’s got nice lips too, full, and oh shit, I forgot to talk.
“Um. Hi. I’m—”
“Sienna Cole,” he answers for me, and I open my mouth and then shut it again.
“Anything else you’d like to say for me?” I ask, and he smirks.
“You are the captain of the lacrosse team, and looking incredibly beautiful tonight if you don’t mind me saying,” he compliments right away and now I’m the one smirking.
He was talking to his friends… who have now walked away. I hope they don’t think I’m rude, or—
“I’m Lawson Bennet. I never thought I’d see the day that you spoke to me.”
“Are you keeping tabs on me, Lawson?” I ask.
It’s common knowledge that I'm the captain of the team. Everyone knows that, but that doesn’t explain why he knows that.
He’s a meathead football player just like the rest of them.
They don’t care about anything but themselves, and how fit they are.
They especially don’t care about any sport that’s not their own.
“How could I not?” he asks as he leans against the wall, holding a Solo Cup of clear liquid. I’m close enough to him now though, and I don’t smell alcohol on his breath. “You’re stunning, and an incredible lacrosse player. I might swoon just staring at you, dollface.”
He raises his eyebrows, and I'm thankful he can’t feel how hot my cheeks are right now.
I already know all the things he’s saying and the last thing I need is for him to tell me what I already know.
I shouldn’t be affected by his flirting.
He flirts with everyone, he’s probably used that exact line on someone else. I bet you it worked too…
“You’re a sweet talker, Lawson,” I tilt my head to the side, resting it on the wall I lean on now.
“And you’re a great listener aren’t you, Sienna?”
I’m in shock. He doesn’t seem like the bold type.
He seems stupid, but hot enough to pull anyway.
Like the type of guy that looks great, but the second he opens his mouth you want to pretend you were never there in the first place.
Lawson looks exactly like the kind of person who would say something misogynistic or vulgar that would turn me off in two seconds.
Then again, he has hooked up with almost half of the student body at this point, and he had to get there somehow.
“Why did you come over to talk to me tonight Sienna?” he asks, and I feel like I’ve been caught.
My eyes drift down. He’s wearing a blue shirt, so light it’s almost white. It’s meant to be oversized on him, but that doesn’t hide the fact that I know how good his body looks under the material. Even with the extra space, his arms are huge, and the left one has tattoos sprawled across.
“Because I never have before.”
That’s not a lie. Not at all. I haven’t talked to him, but I know that’s not the reason I’m here right now.
I’m here because Kamryn made me… and because I haven’t had sex in a little over a year.
Because if he wasn’t so hot, and she didn’t give me a small push I never would have done this at all. I want it, but I’m terrified that I do.
“And?” He raises his eyebrows.
He’s got a smirk that could kill a thousand hearts in one sweep.
I don’t do hookups. I don’t do them. I’m helplessly failing at convincing myself this is a bad idea when he looks the way he does.
It’s Lawson Bennet… He’s got bad idea written on him in bright neon letters. Letters I seem to be ignoring.
“And nothing,” I lie.
I really can’t do hookups. I told Kamryn that. I’m not the type. I’ve never been the type. I want boyfriends. But not Lawson. Not any football player. Honestly not any athlete. Not anyone at Seattle Pike University. It’s a distraction and an easy way to end up hurt.
“Come on, dollface. Tell me the real reason you came and talked to me tonight. I know there are a hundred people in this room you’ve probably never talked to. So why me?”
His question is fully loaded, and as much as I wish I could answer it I can’t.
I’m lost for words because Lawson Bennet may be an idiot, but he knows how to use his words to persuade, and he’s probably the hottest person I’ve ever seen.
He’s tall too. My eyes drift, and he moves his hand up, his fingers hooking under my chin to keep my gaze on him.
“I… Um…” The words are caught in my throat at the sight of how large his hands are. The tattoo on his forearm wraps around, covering the entire thing. Pretty roses with light gray shading. Another red flag.
“I’ll say it if you don’t want to. I’m talking to you right now because I find you stupidly attractive, and would love nothing more than to leave with you tonight. Does that sound appealing, Sienna?”
My mouth is dry. Is this normal? Hookups falling at my feet from hot men? This can’t be how it usually goes.
“I talked to you first. Who’s to say that’s what I wanted? Who’s to say you would have spoken to me at all tonight if I didn’t approach you first?” I shouldn’t ask so many questions, especially considering he’s right and that is why I came over here.
For fun, just like Kamryn said. Oh shit, Kamryn. I can’t leave her here all alone.
“I’m to say that I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while now.
But you and Kamryn are so tight-knit there’s no separating you most of the time.
I’m also to say that every time I’ve been around you, you’ve given me no interest. So you actively choosing to talk to me at an end-of-semester party, where I saw Kamryn purposely leave you all by yourself…
I’m just taking the context clues provided to me.
Given all of that, I feel like you only want one thing, just like I do. ”
He takes a long swig from his drink.
“I don’t do hookups.”
“I don’t do dating.”
The reddest of red flags. I knew that. We all knew that.
Me and every other girl on campus. I’ve heard plenty of stories about how he always tells girls explicitly before they hook up that he’s not dating right now—not to hold any expectations.
Honestly, it works out for him. He never circles back and sleeps with the same girl again, no feelings that way I guess.
Why am I doing this again? I just tacked on more warning signs on top of the ones that were already there.
You could see Lawson’s red flags from space.
“If that’s what you’re looking for—”
I cut him off right away, “I don’t want to date you, don’t get a big head.”
He narrows his eyes at me, his lips turning up into a smirk. His lips are so full. His face is perfectly crafted. He… He is perfectly sculpted, even with clothes on.
“I’m just saying I’ve never,” I stop myself. “I mean, I don’t normally… I’m not the type to—”
He nods his head, picking up what I’m saying, “You want me to be your first hookup? I’m kind of honored. You’re choosing me?” he asks, and I roll my eyes.
His ego is going to get in the way of this if he keeps it up.
“Lawson, don’t turn me off before you even turn me on,” I shake my head, and he steps forward, his body entering my personal space.
I’m not short. I’m taller than Kamryn by a few inches, which isn’t much considering she’s incredibly short.
Lawson Bennet is 6’4 and has nothing but muscle, anyone looks small compared to him.
He towers over me, and I swear the second he stands where he does, his chest to mine, his face tilted down toward me.
The rest of the room is gone into thin air.
I’ve forgotten where I am other than in the blonde devil’s orbit.
“Do you want to come home with me, Sienna?” He asks, and I think of the other football players who live with him.
I imagine Griffin and Bellamy being only a wall away from me and I shake my head no. Lawson steps back and I bring every ounce of confidence I have to the surface before he takes his place back on the wall.
“But you can come home with me.”
His eyebrows raise. Now I’m speaking his language but I’m not speaking mine. This isn’t how I roll, but it’s how I’m rolling tonight.