Chapter 32
Chapter Thirty-Two
PAIGE
He fired me.
Okay, not exactly fired, but Josh has been giving me fewer and fewer hours, and every time I have watched his son, I’ve been given errands to run, or Josh himself was out of the house. He’s been avoiding me, not answering my questions, and has been an overall terrible employer.
The weirdest part is that he’s still paying me. I watched Cassian one time two days ago for two hours. I was going to come in again today, but he messaged me not to bother coming in when I was on my way.
So I came anyway.
Between what happened with Becky and that woman, Bethany and her mother, and everything that happened with me, I’m sticking to standing up for myself. I’m in my don’t take shit era. Bethany says it’s pregnancy rage. I told her to mind her own damn business.
She may have a point.
My phone pings with a message from Joseph, but a quick overview shows me what I already knew. We have a strong case. He thinks we have this in the bag.
Trevor responds to the group chat with a thumbs-up emoji. I have feelings about how nonchalant he’s treating this situation right now, but I’ll deal with him another time. Right now, Josh is looking through his blinds, directly at me, and he does not look pleased.
Tough.
I jog up to his front door and knock, ignoring the doorbell, fully aware that the baby could be sleeping. He opens the door, but stands in the way. “What are you doing here? I told you I didn’t need—”
“What’s happening right now, Josh? Everybody is gossiping and saying awful things, and you’re not giving me hours when I know I’m damn good at my job.” I peek around him, but he sidesteps, blocking my view.
“Paige—”
“No, you listen.” His mouth snaps shut at my tone—his eyes widening.
“I am so tired.” Traitorous heat gathers behind my eyes, but I blink it away.
“I worked hard for you. Time I thought was going to be spent at home with my son over the summer became time I split with him and your son,” I poke him in the chest. “Because you made a special request that I followed.”
“I understand, but—”
“I’m not. Done. Talking.”
“Alright, alright.”
“Now, my hours are cut to next to nothing without a single word from you, and all the while, our town is blowing up with all kinds of petty gossip.” He drops his head, and his shoulders droop.
I step closer to him, and he takes a quick step back.
“Do you know what they’re saying about you?
About me and you and Carri?” He opens his mouth, then pauses.
Closing his mouth, he nods. “What have you heard?”
A blush rises in his cheeks, then he stumbles on his words.
“Josh?”
He lifts his head and meets my eyes with resignation written all over his face. He steps back to let me through the door, but I hesitate. “I need to tell you some things, and it’s going to be wildly uncomfortable for both of us, alright?”
Now I really don’t want to go into his house.
“Why?”
He sighs and runs his hands through his hair. “Let’s go sit down and talk in the living room.”
“Is Cass—”
“He’s with Carri.”
What the heck? I wrinkle my nose at the unexpected news, completely unsure how to feel.
On one hand, I’m thrilled for that little boy to get to be with his mother.
On the other, I’m worried about him being with a woman who abandoned him so thoroughly at such a young age.
But they’re the parents, and I know that Josh loves his son.
I follow Josh into the house and into the same living room I’ve been in countless times over the last few months.
A discomfort I haven’t felt before settles over me.
He sits on the loveseat, and I take the chair across from him, crossing my arms in front of me. “With Carri …”
“Yes.” His voice holds no ounce of give.
“Okay.”
Josh releases a deep sigh, his leg bouncing as he stares at his steepled fingers.
“You remember how I said I knew you? In high school?”
“Yeah, I remember.”
“Well, I”—ahem—“I had a crush on you. A huge crush. Unsent notes, plans to ask you to prom, though you were so much older. That whole thing.”
“Oh.” He’s right. Embarrassment rolls through me. This was not what I was expecting.
“Ha, yeah. Oh. When I had to move, I was sad, but I got over it. It wasn’t too long afterward that I met Carri, who is practically your opposite.
” The tall, slender, dark-haired, grey-eyed, arctic beauty is absolutely my opposite.
“Well, I was still enamored with you, at that point, and so I kind of dismissed her at first, even though we kept getting paired and partnered in everything.” His entire face is on fire, making the undeniable blush on my face more palatable.
“I had a friend then. He knew about you. This part is important.” He glances at me, then stares at his hands once again.
“Years passed, and I forgot all about you and fell madly in love with my sweet Caroline.” He leans back and grabs a hold of his hair.
“We moved back here when she got pregnant because the school here is far better than at Edgewood.” I nod because it was something Trevor and I discussed too.
“Then, we started the process of finding you—or a nanny. I saw your name and had a feeling it was you, but all Carri saw were your stats. You are an impressive nanny with great certifications and fantastic reviews and recommendations.”
I duck my head. I needed to work, so I gave it my all. “Thank you.” I worry about the direction this conversation is going, and I hate it.
“She told me she already wanted you. When we interviewed you, I realized you didn’t recognize me, so I let it go. Carri knew of my high school crush, but P. Whitaker was not the same person.”
“Oh, no.”
Josh rubs his hands back and forth on his lap and slaps them down once, hard. The loud clap makes me jump. “Sorry, but yes.”
“What did you do?”
“I-I can’t get too far into it without feeling like I’m damaging her trust more than I already have. All I will say is that you’re exceptional at your job, and Carri was a stressed-out new mom who found out her husband’s ’one who got away’ was now his nanny.” He finger quotes, avoiding looking up.
I recoil at his description, and he blows out a noisy breath. “Not actually the description I would use. It was a puppy crush. It was nothing to me.”
“It was something to her.”
“Yeah. It was something to her.”
“Damn, Josh … But that still doesn’t explain the rumors.”
“No, it doesn’t. And before you even start to think it, there is no way Carri would do this.
” He cuts his hand through the air. “I think it was a nasty rumor that was spread through bored parents and hateful, jealous people.” His leg begins to bounce again, and he picks his phone up, checking the screen before laying it back down.
Or my husband’s coworkers. “And the reason you’re not having me come in anymore?”
“Carri has been taking him.”
“Why couldn’t you just tell me?”
“You’re a sore topic for her.”
Oh. “And it would have been another—”
“Betrayal.”
I sit back to digest the new information.
The discomfort of knowing I am the reason someone else feels the way that I do.
“So, to Carri, I’m … what? The other woman?
” My stomach twists when I think about my own casual touches.
I’m touchy with people. I did this to another woman.
Made her feel the way I do about Krista.
He meets my eyes, and my discomfort triples when he doesn’t dispute the claim.
“Exactly that.” Acid coats the back of my throat.
I swallow it down, but it gets caught. I need to leave.
“I was on the phone with the guy I went to high school with, and the call was picked up by the car when she started it.”
“The friend who knew about your crush.”
“I had just told him that you were my nanny, just bringing up something, a shared history between him and me. He—fuck.” He closes his eyes, then looks to the ceiling. “He is the type of person who would cheat on his woman with the help—”
I can’t help but flinch. The help.
“Dammit. I’m sorry, Paige. That’s not—I’m just saying that’s how he would view the situation. Not me.”
I’ve really got to get out of here. I search the area around me, making sure there’s nothing I brought that I’d need to come back to get. Seeing nothing, I stand and brush off my legs. “I’m going to go.” I flee to the door, but he scrambles after me.
“Paige, I’m sorry about all of this. You didn’t deserve any of the fallout.”
I spin on him. “Oh, you’re right. I didn’t, and you haven’t had my back at all in any of this.
Apparently, though, you also didn’t have your wife’s back.
All this time, my heart was breaking for you and your son, but it needed to be breaking for your wife and your son.
” I’m almost to the door, but he’s still following me.
“That’s not—”
That’s it. I turn around and face him, one hand on the doorknob.
“Have you done anything to dispel these rumors? Anything at all beyond quiet-firing me? Don’t you think they’re hurting your wife, too?
You think it’s just you or me they are hurting?
Or are you hiding out here in your castle, avoiding the truth of what you’ve done since it only affects your wife and the help? ”
“Jesus, Paige. It’s not like any of it is true. I haven’t been pining away for you.”
“Oh, fun. Excuses.” I open the door and head to the Suburban, calling over my shoulder, “I’m calling the program director and requesting the drop. I suggest you hop onto the site and replace me.” He stands in the doorway, looking no better than he deserves. “Goodbye.”
I stopped by the house to pick up Bethany, and she takes over driving while I’m this upset.
Normally, I’d listen to Linkin Park and drive to the ridges when I feel this way, but after my accident, driving for fun isn’t my favorite thing.
Instead, Bethany takes the back way to Piggies to get what I’m currently craving.
I need something sweet, something salty, and something chocolatey.