Chapter 30 Reconciliation
They set off down the very path Elizabeth had trod that morning. She became silent as she remembered the events of those early hours.
Mr. Darcy must have noticed, for he said, “Georgiana, I saw a linnet’s nest at the edge of the moor in the scrub. It is easily seen from the path. See if you can find it. It is a fine specimen for your collection.”
The girl looked to Elizabeth. “I have more than twenty nests that we have collected over the years, Lizzy. It is one of the things we look for when we walk upon the moor.”
She hurried off.
Elizabeth felt the significance of the girl’s dismissal. Mr. Darcy wished to say something he did not want his sister to hear. Was he going to continue his scold? She hoped not, for he had appeared cheerful when he arrived that morning.
She kept her eyes upon the path and prepared herself for his censure.
“Miss Elizabeth, I must apologize for this morning. I did not mean to be so severe as to bring you to tears.”
She raised her head and met his eyes. She would not permit him to speak of her humiliation.
“Please, sir, I was not overset.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I know my censure upset you. I saw it in your face as I spoke, and when I brought Georgiana to you later, your swollen eyelids told me how deeply I had distressed you. I meant only to warn you. You are an innocent and cannot possibly understand how a hardened man might behave should he come upon you alone and unprotected.”
He stood very straight, and his expression was solemn.
“If I instilled in you a little of the caution you ought to feel under such circumstances, then I am glad of it. But I did not mean to overset you. I feared you might rebel against my censure. It never occurred to me that I might drive you to tears.”
Elizabeth felt the heat rise in her face and kept her head lowered.
“Miss Elizabeth. I could never forgive myself if you came to harm here in Derbyshire when a simple warning from me might have prevented it.”
He stopped walking, and she did the same.
“Miss Elizabeth?”
She raised her eyes.
“Am I forgiven?”
“Yes, sir. I understand now that you spoke only out of concern for my safety. But this morning I feared my conduct and my dress had so lowered me in your estimation that you would break off the acquaintance. I even wondered whether you would permit your sister to visit me again.”
His lips pressed together, but he said nothing.
She continued. “It was very broadminded of you, sir, to allow Georgiana to remain with me all these hours in study. If anything could assure me that you do not think me a... a wanton, sir, it is that.”
His complexion darkened, and he made an apologetic sound. “I am sorry, ma’am. I should not have used that particular word. I did not mean to suggest that you were a wanton, but that some unscrupulous man might mistake you for one and use you badly. Do you understand the distinction?”
“Yes, sir. I hoped that was your meaning, though I was so overset that I was not entirely certain what you had said or what you thought of me. I am no wanton, sir. I am a decent, well-behaved woman, though I see now that my father allowed me, indeed, all five of his daughters, too much freedom and imposed too little restraint. Running alone upon an open moor in trousers did not seem improper to me, provided I was not discovered at it. Now I know better. One never knows when one may be caught wearing a shockingly improper costume, nor what harm it can provoke.” Her eyes were unguarded, earnest as she watched his face.
“Miss Elizabeth, your contrition is so affecting that I am almost of a mind to laugh, but I shall not. This is a serious matter, and I would not have you mistake my amusement for permission to expose yourself to some future danger.”
“I understand, sir.” Again, she averted her eyes.
“You look unhappy, ma’am. Have I injured your feelings?”
“No, sir. I am sad because I do enjoy a run in the morning. I cannot very well ask one of Mr. Radcliff’s footmen to attend me, for I know it is a highly improper exercise for a gentlewoman. And since I can no longer wear my running costume, I fear I am reduced to walking.”
They walked on in silence and then stopped at the edge of the moor, just beyond Georgiana’s hearing. They watched as she searched the scrub for the abandoned nest.
“Miss Elizabeth, my sister and I could ride here in the mornings and meet you at the gate. We could accompany you while you run. Have you no other costume that is less...”
“Shocking, sir?”
“Revealing,” he supplied.
“I could wear my pelisse over it. I have shortened an old one so the fabric will not entangle my legs. It falls to mid-calf, and I wear my trousers underneath. I wear it on winter mornings when I cannot endure the cold.”
“Yes, that would answer very well. I shall warn my sister beforehand so that your attire does not shock her.”
Elizabeth briefly laid her hand upon his forearm and pressed it.
“Thank you, sir. I cannot tell you how much this means to me. As I said, I have run most mornings since I was fourteen. I do not know why, but the exercise gives me energy and lightens my spirits. I feel as though I can face almost anything when I begin my day in such a manner.”
He looked at her, understanding in his eyes. “I imagine it helps you bear the loss of your father.”
“Yes, sir. And my mother and youngest sister.”
Her throat tightened with emotion and her eyes filled. His kindness had been too tender. It had touched something within her, and now the well of grief opened. She sniffed and reached for her handkerchief, drawing it from her sleeve to wipe her eyes.
Georgiana saw and came running. “What is it, Lizzy?”
Elizabeth suppressed a sob and shook her head.
“Remember how I told you earlier that I lost my Papa in May? The grief is still very fresh, and sometimes it rises when I least expect it. But now that we are out walking and the sun is shining, my spirits will soon recover. Am I permitted to help you search for the nest?”
“Yes, come, Lizzy. You search on the right, and I shall search on the left.”
Not ten minutes later, Georgiana discovered a neat, cup-shaped nest tucked into the scrub.
“Come and see, Lizzy. It is the sweetest little nest, hidden away in here.”
Elizabeth went to her and watched as Georgiana carefully freed the abandoned nest from the branches.
They walked on, and presently Mr. Darcy said, “We turn to the left here. The brook lies just beyond those trees, not half a mile away, where the alders and willows are growing.”
Elizabeth saw a line of trees stretching along the edge of the moor. “Has anyone caught anything yet, sir?”
“Yes. We have all caught a trout. Your uncle has taken two already.”
Elizabeth brightened. “I am glad, sir, for he seldom has the pleasure of fishing. He spends so much of his time in London attending to business.”
They conversed pleasantly until they reached the brook. Mr. Gardiner propped his rod against a rock and came to meet them.
“Lizzy, we have three trout for our dinner already. I can almost taste them. Your rod is here, and your box of flies is there upon that flat stone.”
“Thank you, Uncle. Please, return to your sport. I am going to teach Georgiana how to cast a line today. You need not trouble yourself to entertain me.”
“Very well, Niece. I know you are skilled at the sport, and I shall take you at your word.”
Elizabeth took up her rod and box of flies. “Come, Georgiana. Let us find ourselves a likely fishing hole.”
“Hand me the bird’s nest, Sister. I shall set it atop my lunch basket.”
Mr. Darcy followed them. When they began climbing over the boulders bordering the brook, he said, “Miss Elizabeth, allow me to carry your rod and box so that you may have your hands free.”
Her eyes brightened. “Thank you, sir.” She handed them to him. “Navigating these stones is somewhat more difficult while wearing skirts.”
She flushed, and he grinned.
“Yes, ma’am. Trousers would be more to the point when pursuing this sport.”
“Yes, sir. I see you understand me.”
When they reached the brook, Mr. Darcy handed her the rod. “Shall I assemble it for you, ma’am?”
Her eyes brightened with amusement. “No, thank you, sir. I am able to manage it. It is one of the skills I wish to teach Georgiana. If you would like to retrieve your own rod and take a place nearby, we shall call upon you should we require assistance.” She glanced at him. “Have you a creel, sir?”
“I do, Miss Elizabeth. You are optimistic, ma’am.”
“Yes, sir. I have never yet gone fishing and returned without a catch.”
He inclined his head, offered her a grin, and left them.
Elizabeth was instructing Georgiana in the selection of a fly when Mr. Darcy returned.
“We shall use this Blue Dun because the brook has had several hours to warm. Do you see the mayflies upon the surface? The trout should be rising to feed.”
She secured the fly and explained the several movements required to cast the line.
“I shall cast first so that you may see what I mean, and then I shall talk you through it.”
Georgiana listened closely, and Elizabeth was touched by the girl's earnest attention.
She took her position beside the brook, drew the rod back, and with a practiced movement sent the line unfurling behind her. A turn of her wrist brought it forward again in a graceful arc. The line straightened above the water, and the little fly settled lightly upon the surface.
Nothing rose to it.
Elizabeth waited a moment, then lifted the line from the water and cast again. The movement was smooth and effortless, the line sweeping through the air before the Blue Dun came to rest upon the brook once more. She explained each movement as she cast the line.
“Your casting is elegant,” Mr. Darcy said, “as graceful as your singing. I could sit upon this stone and watch you for the rest of the day.”
Georgiana giggled, and Elizabeth’s eyes flashed with amusement. “Thank you, Mr. Darcy. What you see is the result of many years of practice.”
“Which began when you were fourteen?”
“Ah, no, sir. My father first put a fishing rod into my hands when I was eight. When I began my studies two years later, he used fishing as an inducement to keep me at my books for six hours each day. It worked. I became a student of Greek and Roman literature and a skilled fisherwoman besides.”
She ended with a laugh.
Mr. Darcy was grinning as he prepared to cast his own line. Elizabeth and Georgiana watched him. There was artistry in his movements. He was beautiful to behold, his tall, masculine form possessing a grace that made even the simple act of casting seem elegant.
“My turn, Lizzy.”
Elizabeth reluctantly dragged her eyes from the brother to assist the sister.
By the end of an hour, Georgiana had managed to hook a tree, a bush, the bank, and finally Elizabeth’s gown.
“Wait, Georgiana. Do not move a muscle. You have caught me.” Elizabeth looked to Mr. Darcy. “Sir, would you be so kind as to free my gown before the hook finds my leg?”
“Do not move, Georgie. I am coming.”
He propped his rod among the stones and went to Elizabeth’s side.
He caught up the line and drew a pair of scissors from his jacket pocket.
Elizabeth raised a brow.
He grinned. “My fishing scissors, ma’am. I ordinarily keep them in my tackle box, but when I am at the sport, I carry them in my fishing jacket.”
He cut the line near the hook. “You may move now, Georgie.”
He worked at the hook for another moment until he freed it from Elizabeth’s gown. After examining the fly, he placed it in her hand.
“This is a fine fly, ma’am. Was it one of your father’s?”
“No, sir. I gave his collection to my uncle. I could not bear to look upon them. Papa loved fishing above every other sport. It was too difficult...”
“I understand,” he said.
He glanced at the fly in her hand. “Whose collection is this?”
“These are mine, sir. I tied them myself. You must understand that my father was a teacher at heart. He had no son, and I suppose I filled that void. He would have taught all of us, but none of my sisters cared for outdoor pursuits.”
“What else did he teach you, Miss Elizabeth?”
“I can row a boat. I learned upon our pond. I can swim, and I can play cricket. I climb trees as well, though Papa cannot claim the credit for that. Playing with the neighborhood boys as a child provided all the instruction I required.”
“Do you ride, ma’am?”
“No, sir. I never learned.”
Georgiana spoke from beside them. “Lizzy, I have been fishing for more than an hour. I believe I shall rest now.”
“Very well, dear. Do you mind if I try my hand at it?”
“Not at all. I shall be happy to watch you.”
Elizabeth took up her rod, and she and Mr. Darcy fished for the remainder of the day, standing only a few feet apart, but seldom speaking, yet each contented in the society of the other.