Chapter 40 Family and Friends #2
Elizabeth caught his arm and drew him behind the hedge. She rose onto her toes, wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him.
“Sir, you put me in mind of the Greek gods I was so eager to study.”
Darcy drew her closer. “Do I?”
“Very much so.”
She kissed him again.
“I have been wishing to kiss you all morning, sir.”
Darcy wrapped his arms around her waist, drew her close, and kissed her soundly.
* * *
Two evenings later, Radcliffs and their guests dined at Pemberley.
It was Elizabeth’s first visit to the house that would soon become her home. She had heard Georgiana and Fitzwilliam speak of Pemberley often enough to have formed some idea of it, but nothing they had told her prepared her for its grandeur.
The entrance hall alone was larger than Elizabeth had expected, its high ceiling rising above marble floors and tall columns. Beyond it, a broad staircase swept upward before dividing toward the galleries, its carved balustrade gleaming beneath a great chandelier.
Elizabeth resisted the temptation to stare. She removed her gloves and listened to Mrs. Radcliff's remarks as though entering houses of this magnificence were an ordinary occurrence.
Caroline was already in the drawing room when Elizabeth entered with Jane and the Gardiners.
“Eliza, come help me. I have been attempting to convince Colonel Fitzwilliam that a sensible person may enjoy London without being deficient in character.”
Richard looked offended. “That bears very little resemblance to what I said.”
Elizabeth removed her gloves. “My dear friend, I fear I cannot assist you. I have become very partial to Derbyshire.”
Darcy had been speaking with Mr. Bingley when she entered. As soon as their conversation ended, he came to her.
“Elizabeth. I have been looking forward to this evening. I have wanted to see you at Pemberley almost from the moment I first knew you.”
Elizabeth stared at him. “Fitzwilliam, you astonish me, sir.”
“I believe I began imagining you here from the moment I saw you walking along the creek that first day. I did not understand it then, but somehow, I saw you here as my wife.”
Elizabeth lifted his hand and kissed it.
He offered his arm.
“There is something I would like to show you.”
Darcy led her from the drawing room and along a quieter passage before opening a door.
The room beyond was smaller and more intimate than the grand apartments Elizabeth had already seen. Tall windows overlooked the gardens, and a fireplace occupied one wall. The furnishings were handsome but had plainly belonged to another generation.
Darcy watched as she crossed to the windows.
“This was my mother’s private parlor. It has traditionally been reserved for the mistress of Pemberley.”
Elizabeth looked back at him.
“It is yours now.”
She ran her hand lightly over the desk near the window. “It is beautiful, sir.”
“You may change anything you wish. The furniture, the curtains, the carpets. I want you to make it your own.”
“It was your mother’s favorite room. I should not wish to change it very much.”
“My mother would have expected the next mistress of Pemberley to make her own home here.”
Darcy crossed to a pair of empty bookcases beside the fireplace.
“I thought these would be useful. I moved my mother’s books to the library.”
Elizabeth joined him and ran her fingers along one of the shelves. “For my father’s books?”
“Yes.”
She looked at him.
“I know how much they mean to you, darling. There should be room for a great many here, and if there is not, we shall add more shelves.”
Elizabeth looked again at the empty bookcases.
“There are trunks and trunks of Papa’s books in the Phillipses’ attic for I have had nowhere to put them.”
Darcy took her hand.
“Now you do.”
Her eyes filled.
She stepped closer and put her arms around him. Darcy held her against him and kissed her temple.
“Thank you, Fitzwilliam.”
He drew back enough to look at her. “I hope you will be very happy here, Elizabeth.”
“I am happy, sir. So long as we are together, I can be happy anywhere.”
When they returned to the drawing room, Caroline looked from Elizabeth to Darcy and quickly lowered her eyes.
During dinner, Elizabeth sat several places from Darcy. Once, when she reached for her wineglass, she found him watching her intently.
She winked.
His mouth curved into a smile.
Elizabeth returned her attention to Jane, who was telling her about something little Edward had done during the journey. Mr. Bingley, seated near enough to hear, listened to the woman he adored.
When Elizabeth glanced up, she found Caroline watching Darcy then she met Elizabeth’s eyes. “I do not believe I have ever seen Mr. Darcy so happy.”
Elizabeth looked across the table at him.
“Neither have I.”
After dinner, Georgiana played for them. When she finished, Darcy went to speak with her before she left the pianoforte.
Caroline watched them together.
“Georgiana has changed since London. She seems much more at ease.”
“She is.”
Darcy returned a short while later carrying a book.
“I found this for you.”
Elizabeth accepted it and examined the title.
“A history of Derbyshire printed in 1700.”
She opened the volume and began looking through the table of contents.
Caroline leaned nearer. “What can you possibly find so engaging in an old history of Derbyshire?”
Elizabeth continued reading down the list of chapters.
Darcy settled beside her. “There is a chapter concerning Arbor Low.”
“Is there?”
He turned the page and pointed to the place where the chapter was listed.
Elizabeth found it and began to read. “It speaks of the summer and winter solstices, sir.”
Darcy bent nearer to look at the page with her.
Across from them, Caroline watched in silence. When Elizabeth raised her eyes, Caroline looked away.
* * *
Dinner passed pleasantly, and the party remained together until late in the evening. After the guests from Ashcroft had departed, Charles noticed Caroline leave the drawing room and followed her.
He found her in the small parlor he had been using for his office while at Pemberley.
“Caroline, you have scarcely spoken for the last two hours. Something has distressed you.”
She stopped near the window. “I thought I would marry him, Charles.”
Bingley was silent.
“For years, I thought I would marry Mr. Darcy. I know he never asked me or promised me anything, but I believed it would happen in time. Our families were intimate. Georgiana liked me. I was always welcome at Pemberley, and Mr. Darcy and I moved in the same society. There seemed no reason I could not become his wife.”
Charles moved to the couch where she sat.
“I thought if I were patient enough, accomplished enough, and near him when we were in company, he would eventually see me as the woman he ought to marry. I tried to interest myself in what interested him. I tried to be everything I thought he would want.”
Caroline looked at her brother.
“I know how foolish that sounds.”
Charles offered his handkerchief. “I do not think you were foolish to love him. I have always known you admired Darcy, but I did not understand that you had built your future around him.”
“I did. I could not imagine a future without him.”
Her voice broke.
Charles took her hand.
“I have watched him with Eliza. He remembers what interests her. He finds books because he knows they will please her. He watches her when she is not looking at him. He brought her into his mother’s parlor and showed her the shelves he emptied for her father’s books.”
Caroline tightened her fingers around his.
“I thought his affection would come in time,” she continued. “He was reserved with everyone, so I told myself his reserve with me meant nothing. I thought that was simply his nature.”
“Caroline, I have known Darcy a long time. I am sorry to say this when you are already distressed, but I do not believe he ever thought of marrying you.”
Her face crumpled.
Charles tightened his hold on her hand. “I would give a great deal not to hurt you, but I will not lie to you.”
“That is what I discovered tonight. I spent years believing I had only to wait, and all the while he had never considered me at all.”
Tears slipped down her cheeks.
“Eliza has everything I wanted, and she did nothing to obtain it. She simply met him, and he loved her.”
Caroline leaned against him.
“I spent years wondering what more I could do to attach him. Tonight I discovered there was nothing I could have done. He was capable of all the affection I wanted from him. He simply did not feel it for me.”
Charles held her while she cried.
“I wish there were something I could say to make this easier, Caroline. I am very sorry.”
She wiped her face. “I feel as though I have been robbed of something, and that is the worst of it. No one robbed me. Pemberley was never mine. Mr. Darcy was never mine. He never encouraged me to believe otherwise.”
Charles kissed the top of her head.
“I feel as though someone has died, Charles.”
His arm tightened around her.
“Someone has died, Caroline.”
For a long while, he simply held her.