Chapter Seventy-Two
Mary Beth has long known about Caroline’s promise to Midge, Kelly, and Talia.
The sisters had agreed, early on, that Mary Beth would return to Haven Cliff alone on this night, the one-year anniversary of Caroline’s disappearance.
She would leave four pennies on the pedestal marked Ceto—Caroline’s spot, and the source of her daughter’s name.
The pennies were a secret sign her friends would understand.
They’d know Caroline was okay. They’d be able to go on with their lives, and Caroline would go on with hers.
But Caroline has changed. The plan has changed. Everything has changed.
Yes, Mary Beth still makes the long drive back to Mulberry Bay. But Caroline is in the passenger’s seat. Ceto is in back, asleep in her car seat—six months old now, a cherub of a child with golden ringlets and big blue eyes.
Tonight, unlike last year, it’s raining.
Tonight, a sick feeling has replaced the butterflies in her stomach.
Tonight, she isn’t embarking on a mission to rescue her sister. She’s losing the only two people who have ever truly mattered to her.
She parks at Woody Lo-Hi, the abandoned camp across the lake, just as she did on this night last year. Again, she borrows a canoe from the half dozen stored in the crafts shack with the broken lock.
Paddling across the shadowy, ripply lake, she kneels in the middle facing the stern, doing her best to keep herself low to distribute the weight.
Caroline is behind her in the bow, holding Ceto, who’s still strapped into the car seat that doubles as an infant carrier.
“Careful!” Caroline cries out every time the boat wobbles.
“Don’t flail!” Mary Beth barks. “You’re making it worse!”
“I can’t help it! I’m afraid! I feel like we’re going to flip over and die!”
“So do I!”
“What? But I thought you knew how to—”
“I do know how to paddle a canoe! I got us back across the lake last year after you ran away, remember?”
“I don’t remember it being this scary.”
“It wasn’t pouring out! And it was just the two of us, and we can both swim! We didn’t have to worry about a helpless little baby! She shouldn’t be here! Neither of you were supposed to be here tonight!”
Caroline weeps softly until at last, they make it to the opposite shore. Mary Beth ties the canoe to an old fishing pier piling poking up from the shallows.
They disembark in silence. Caroline covers the baby’s carrier with a blanket and hands Mary Beth the small satchel containing a few items for the baby.
For herself, she has only the clothes on her back, and the treasured pink Walkman clipped to her jacket.
She’s left all her other possessions behind in Syracuse, discarded remnants of a life she no longer wants.
Now Mary Beth herself has become one of those castoffs. Unwanted, unneeded. Raindrops and teardrops run down her cheeks as they make their way along the pebbly beach, up the steep stone stairs to the old woodland trail.
Last year, she took a roundabout route through the woods to her designated meeting spot with Caroline, dodging raucous postprom kids. But the days of illicit parties amid Haven Cliff’s ruins ended when Caroline Winterfield went missing.
Tonight, the sisters have the deserted grounds to themselves.
“What in the world?” Caroline murmurs when they reach the old pool site.
It’s cordoned off. Heavy equipment is poised nearby.
Mary Beth steps closer to a permit posted on a tree and shines her flashlight on it.
“What does it say?” Caroline asks.
“They’re going to backfill the pit.”
“When?”
“June 15, 2000.”
“That’s tomorrow. I wonder why they’re doing that?”
“Who knows? Who cares?” She clicks off her flashlight and turns away.
“I care,” Caroline says, after a moment. “This used to be our family’s home. I’ll bet it was beautiful back then.”
“Yeah, well, now it’s decrepit and run down. Oh, and cursed.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“Well, I do.”
They duck under the ropes and make their way to the heap of bricks where a colonnade once arched above four stone statues.
Mary Beth sets the satchel on the ground and feels for the four coins she tucked into her pocket this morning, before her sister dropped the bombshell.
She shows Caroline the pennies. “It’s not too late to change your mind.”
“It is, Mary Beth.”
“But we can leave these here for your friends, see? Just like you promised! Just like we said!” Mary Beth places the coins on the pedestal. “Come on, Caroline. This is crazy. We’re getting drenched. It’s not good for the baby. Let’s get out of here and go home.”
She turns back to her sister. Even in the dark, she can see that her hair is plastered to her scalp. Her eyes are rimmed by dark circles and filled with tears. She looks utterly miserable.
“I can’t go back! Don’t you see? I tried. For a whole year, I tried! But for me, this is home.”
“Haven Cliff?”
“Mulberry Bay! I’ve missed it so much. I’ve missed my friends.”
“But you can’t just show up at Mom and Dad’s with a baby! You disappeared! You can’t just reappear like magic! They think you’re dead! That’s what you wanted! Everyone thinks you’re dead!”
“Not everyone. My friends will help me figure out what to—”
“Your friends have moved on, Caroline! They’re in college now. I’m sure they’ve got better things to do. They probably won’t even show up tonight!”
“Yes they will!”
“How do you know?”
“Because I know them.”
“You used to know them. It’s been a year!” Mary Beth shouts, incredulous.
The baby lets out a muffled whimper.
“Shh,” Caroline says. “You’re scaring Ceto.”
“I’m scaring her? She should be at home asleep in her crib, not out here at night in the rain in the middle of nowhere! This is your decision, not mine!”
“I know, and I shouldn’t have involved you. I’m sorry. You can go. They’ll be here soon.”
“I can go? Do you really expect me to just leave you here alone and hope that a bunch of strangers come and rescue you?”
“My friends are not strangers. They’re more like family than Mom and Dad ever were.”
“What about me? I’m not like family. I am family. I’m the one who saved you!”
“I know that, and I’ll always be grateful for everything you did for me. For us.” Caroline looks down at the baby. “But I can’t hide forever. It’s time for me to come back. I have to figure out my life. For her sake.”
“What about my sake?”
“Mary Beth—”
“Please don’t leave me, Caroline!”
“Oh, Mary Beth . . . I have to!”
“But what about me? What about me?” She screeches it over and over, racked in sheer anguish.
The baby is howling now as well, like she, too, is aware that this is wrong.
“Do you hear her?” Mary Beth screams at Caroline. “Do you hear what she’s saying? She’s begging you not to take her away! She knows she belongs with me!”
“She’s crying because of you, Mary Beth! You need to calm down! You’re hysterical!”
Mary Beth flinches, squeezing her eyes shut and shaking her head.
You need to calm yourself down right now, young lady! You’re hysterical!
She’s back at the Golden Bridge home, surrounded by strangers in scrubs, her body tense with agony, struggling to bring her child into the world. It’s been so lonely and difficult for so long, but it’s almost over. The pain, the loneliness, all of it.
The pain is excruciating. Her body, her heart, especially her empty arms that have ached for so long to hold her baby.
And he’s here! He’s here at last! Her son! She can hear him wailing.
Her eyes snap open. The glaring delivery room lights have been extinguished—why?
Because they’re trying to hide the baby from you. They’re trying to take him. You can’t let them take him!
There’s a shadowy figure before her. One of the nurses. She has the baby in a carrier. She’s going to leave with him.
“Give me my baby!” Mary Beth reaches for him. “I want my baby!”
The nurse backs away, sounding frightened.
“No! Mary Beth, what are you doing? This isn’t your baby!”
“Stop!” Mary Beth moves closer, again reaching for the child. “You can’t take my baby! I won’t let you!”
“He’s gone, Mary Beth! Your son is gone! And I’m so sorry for that, but this is my child!”
“How dare you?” Again, Mary Beth attempts to grab the carrier. “Give him to me!”
“Stop! What are you—”
She wrenches the handle from the nurse’s grasp.
The nurse loses her footing.
She falls backward into the chasm with a high-pitched scream.
Mary Beth hears her land with a sickening thud. She hears her own screams, hears screams from the baby. She unstraps him and holds him against her breast.
“Shh! It’s okay, sweetheart! It’s okay. Mommy is here. Mommy’s got you.”
He’s crying, his lungs loud and strong.
“What is it? Did she hurt you? Did that mean old nurse hurt you? Shh, here, let’s take a look . . .”
She finds her flashlight in her pocket and flicks it on, careful not to shine it in her son’s eyes.
In horror, she sees that the child in her arms isn’t a newborn baby boy, but a little girl with blue eyes and blond ringlets. She looks like Caroline, and Caroline is . . .
With a strangled cry, Mary Beth trains the beam into the yawning pit. She must have imagined it. Of course she did. This is just a terrible nightmare, not—
But it is. It is real.
She sees the broken body in the muddy pit far below. Her neck is twisted at an unnatural angle. Her blue eyes are vacant, staring at the heavens.
She isn’t the nurse.
She’s Caroline.