Chapter 5 #2
Danny looked into his mate’s delusional eyes. ‘God help her.’
Hugh gestured to the water bottle. ‘Drink, please.’
Danny downed the rest of the water.
‘How are you feeling now?’
‘Idiotic.’
‘I meant, physically.’
‘Fine.’ He rubbed his chest. ‘I hate feeling like this. I never used to be so flaky.’
Hugh got up and closed the office door. ‘Time for some home truths.’ He pulled up a chair so he was positioned directly in front of Danny.
‘You grew up in a household where love and approval were conditional. Showing emotion was considered weak, and you were constantly criticised and reprimanded for not being who your parents wanted you to be. Your only option was to leave home at eighteen and fly halfway across the world to escape their influence.’
Danny breathed in another waft of Hugh’s aftershave. ‘Something I’ve never regretted.’
‘I know, but then your life was thrown into chaos with the devastating news that your parents were dead and you were the sole carer of your five-year-old brother.’
Danny’s stomach clenched at the memory.
Hugh rested his elbows on his knees, narrowing his gaze.
‘This was followed by a decade of hard work, sacrifice, and channelling your energies into ensuring Connor didn’t suffer and had the best upbringing possible.
And your efforts succeeded—Connor is smart, sensitive, and kind. He’s a credit to you.’
Danny blinked hard, trying to stem the threat of tears.
‘I never once saw you falter, or doubt yourself during that time. You instinctively knew what Connor needed and you were there for him. But I also never saw you properly grieve for the life that was taken away from you, or the loss you’d suffered.
You never cried, got angry, or complained.
And to anyone watching from the outside, you were in total control.
I kept looking at you thinking, one day it’s going to hit him. ’
Danny’s eyes dropped to the floor. ‘And we both know when that happened.’
‘Exactly. My point is, nearly losing Connor was a trigger for a whole other load of shit you hadn’t really dealt with.
Everything that had led up to that point hit you.
A meltdown was unavoidable. You think you’re failing, you’re not.
You’re finally letting go of all that pent up emotion.
It needed to come out at some point. And now it has.
You’ll come out of this stronger and better for it. Trust me.’
‘I hope you’re right.’
Hugh held out his hands. ‘When am I ever wrong?’
Danny laughed. ‘Infuriatingly, never.’
‘It’s a skill, I know.’ Hugh leaned forward and kissed Danny hard on the forehead. ‘I’ve got your back, okay?’
When someone tapped on the door, Danny pulled away from the embrace and frantically wiped his eyes. He wasn’t expecting any clients, and whoever it was, he didn’t want them to see him like this.
Hugh got up and opened the door. ‘Hi, Elena.’
Danny inwardly cringed. Couldn’t she have waited until after he’d pulled himself together?
‘My patient had to cut our session short, so I thought I’d check everything was okay before heading back up.’
‘That’s kind of you.’ Hugh opened the door fully so Elena could see Danny. ‘As you can see, he’s doing okay.’
Danny didn’t feel okay. He was damp from sweating, his eyes were sore from the effort of not crying, and his shirt was dirty from falling on the floor.
An awkward silence filled the air.
Hugh raised an eyebrow, trying to convey a message to Danny to say something.
Danny opened his mouth, hoping for an eloquent speech. ‘Sorry,’ was all that came out.
Elena looked unimpressed. ‘Right.’
Hugh sighed. ‘Is there anything you’d like to add, Danny? Perhaps let Elena know what you were trying to do?’
Danny’s stomach flipped. He felt like he was in front of the headmaster being reprimanded for being cheeky to a teacher. ‘I wanted to apologise for not swapping offices with you.’
Elena nodded slowly. ‘Okay.’
‘And to offer an explanation?’ Hugh urged, narrowing his eyes at Danny.
‘I’m claustrophobic,’ he muttered, like a sulky teenager.
Hugh’s stare intensified, his hand gesture indicating more was needed. ‘And?’
‘And I have a bad hip. I can’t climb stairs.’ There, he’d said it.
Elena looked between Hugh and Danny. ‘You couldn’t have just told me that?’
Danny closed his eyes. ‘Apparently not.’
Another pause hung in the air.
‘Well, thanks for explaining.’ Elena sounded uncertain. ‘At least I understand now. I hope you feel better soon.’
Hugh gave her a warm smile. ‘Thanks for stopping by, Elena. It was kind of you. Hopefully we can put this behind us and make a fresh start as colleagues and friends.’ The optimism in his voice was laughable.
Elena’s expression conveyed her own doubts about this. ‘I’d better get back to my work. Don’t worry about the office swap, I get it. We’ll stay as we are.’
Hugh waved her off. ‘See you around, Elena.’
Elena forced a smile. ‘Sure.’
Danny managed a weak smile.
There was a long pause after Hugh closed the door. When he eventually turned to face Danny, his arms were folded across his chest, and Danny knew a bollocking was coming.
‘That went well.’ Hugh leant against the door.
Danny dropped his head in his hands and wished he could erase everything that had happened and start the day again.
If only.