Chapter 33
Olivia
It’s a week later, and my flight got delayed due to a snowstorm so I am stuck in Chicago O’Hare. This is what I get for skimping on the tickets and not getting the direct flight to Grand Marquee like Robbie suggested. Now I am frantically typing out messages to both Robbie and Alice to let them know the plan needs to be slightly delayed.
The two of them—plus Jordan—were going to pick me up at the airport then we were going to head straight to the Elliots’ cabin three hours to the north. I keep glancing up at the screen but all it says is DELAYED. I’ve been waiting at the gate for half an hour and no one has come up to the desk to give us any information.
My phone rings and I see Robbie’s name flash on the screen.
“Hey, babe. I’m so sorry, I don’t have any updates yet,” I say with a frustrated sigh. Why did this stupid storm have to come today? Just to wreck my plans.
“Can you find someone and ask?” he says with a bit of an edge. My brows furrow and I pause. Is he mad at me? For being stuck in an airport due to a snowstorm I have no control over?
“It’s not going to do much good. Someone nearby tried and the worker just said to sit tight and wait for an attendant to come to the desk. My hands are tied, Robbie.”
He scoffs and I wince slightly. He really is mad. “This wouldn’t have happened if you just let me get you the direct flight.”
“I’m sorry that I have principles, Robbie. Sorry for not letting you pay for everything all the time, like God forbid I ever pay for a meal once in a while. What does it say about you that you need to always be the one to provide?” Shit, it feels good to snap every once in a while. Screw him for being the only one who’s mad. I am angry and frustrated too. We’ve been away from each other for a month and I miss him like crazy. I really don’t want to have this meaningless fight, but at the same time I feel like it’s long overdue.
Robbie is quiet for long enough that I can take a shaky breath and blink back the tears that threaten to escape. His voice is cool when he says, “There’s a winter weather advisory starting, and if we don’t leave in the next two hours we risk not making it up north.”
“And what exactly do you want me to do?” I whisper yell through the phone. “Turn back time, get a different flight? Teleport myself there?” I’m being a bitch and I know it, but how the hell is it my fault that the weather is bad?
“I just want you here!” he yells and I wipe away the tears from my face.
Sniffling, I softly say, “I want to be there too, okay? I’ll let you know as soon as I hear any news. And if I don’t have any updates in the next hour, just go without me. I’ll see if I can get a flight back home. Alright?”
“No, not alright, Olive,” he replies defeatedly. “This is supposed to be our vacation. A full week of spending time together. Just—just keep me posted, I guess.”
“Fine,” I say meekly and he hangs up. And I stare and stare at his name on my phone and let myself cry more, because it’s the first time he didn’t end the call saying I love you.
An hour passes by with no updates and I text Robbie to let him know so the three of them can head to the cabin. It breaks my heart that I won’t get to see him and have the rest of this fight in person. I want to see his face, to know if he truly does blame me for this trip going south, or to see if he’ll hug me and apologize instead. I don’t hear anything back from Robbie or Alice and that puts me in even worse spirits.
When an attendant finally does come she reassures us that we’ll be able to take off in the next hour, which we do. As soon as the plane is about to leave the gate, I text Robbie again and let him know I’ll text him when I land. Then I turn it off, turn my head to the small window and cry some more.
The flight from Chicago to Grand Marquee was only 50 minutes including take off and landing, and even though there was a ton of turbulence, we landed in one piece. I’m not usually paranoid when flying, but with the storm, I did question all my life choices and why I even got on this plane to begin with. I should have just gotten a return flight home from Chicago and not even come here. But I didn’t have my luggage with me and maybe deep down I was also hoping that Robbie would still be here to pick me up.
I feel so lost right now. Robbie is mad at me, Mitchell is probably going to get me fired, and I’m starting to question if a long distance relationship was a good idea. Would we have been better off as just friends, without all the added baggage? Was it all worth it?
I drag my little carry-on and approach the baggage claim area, hoping that my luggage didn’t get lost with the delay. I know this airport like the back of my hand now, and so I walk with my head down, avoiding the looks that people give me when they see my swollen face and puffy eyes.
I shake my head at my traitorous thoughts. Of course it was all worth it. Robbie is worth it. I love him, and I’m willing to fight for him. But is he willing to do the same?
My gaze snags on a pair of black winter boots as they stop and stand next to me. The scuff on the top of the right foot looks exactly like the one I accidentally gave Robbie’s boot when I wore it in the garage last time I was at his house. I tripped and scuffed it on a piece of metal and I immediately panicked thinking he’d get mad. He didn’t. He’d laughed and said, “Love, they’re just a pair of shoes. I’m just glad you didn’t fall.”
I blink away more tears just thinking about him and I slowly look up at the man next to me. He stares back with a look of sadness and exhaustion on his face that mirrors mine. I manage to give him a small smile and say, “You still came.”
Robbie’s shoulders slump and he lets out a sigh before slowly approaching me and wrapping me up in a hug so tight, I can barely breathe. But I don’t care, I hang on to him just as tightly and nuzzle my face in his chest. He’s bundled up in a warm winter coat and I want to burrow myself in there with him. “Of course I came. The trip is not worth it without you there, love,” he says in a ragged voice while wiping away some of my tears.
The luggage arrives and we head to his car. I notice that he brought the Jeep and not the truck this time. He usually prefers to drive the truck in the snow. We don’t say much on the drive to his house and I wonder how awkward this week will be if all we do is fight and ignore each other. I don’t like this feeling one bit, not being able to tell him every single thought I have, not knowing how he feels about skipping the trip because of me. I know he said it wouldn’t be worth it without me, but that’s not true. He loves going up to the cabin every year, and Alice and Jordan would have been there too.
When we get to his house, everything is quieter than usual. Not even the cats come to greet me and that brings another wave of sadness. So I just walk straight over to the couch and lie down. Robbie crouches and pushes a strand of hair away from my eyes.
“Olive, we need to talk,” he says, serious but in a soft tone.
I sit up slowly and look anywhere but at him when I say, “I’m sorry you’re missing out on the trip. I messed up your plans and it’s all my fault. I’ll reschedule my flight for tomorrow or something and I can leave you be.”
Robbie’s fists clench and he sits next to me, turning me slightly so I can look at him. I still avoid his eyes. “Why do you think I want you gone?”
I close my eyes but my shoulders slump as his hands are holding me. I all but melt into him, my head leaning on his shoulder. “Because, I don’t deserve you. I just feel like I’m always going to mess things up and you’ll just leave me.”
Robbie grips the back of my neck and pulls me closer to him so that I’m now crushed to his chest. His heart is beating fast.
“Because you didn’t say I love you,” I whisper.
“When?” he asks gently.
“On the phone, after we had our fight.”
“Oh, love. Can you look at me, please?” he pulls back and gently tilts my chin up so I can see his face. “I’m sorry about earlier,” he says, and I can see the regret in his eyes. “But I need you to listen to what I’m about to say.”
I nod and he continues. “Earlier, I was frustrated at the situation and I took it out on you. That wasn’t fair, I get that. I know you can’t control the weather. I apologize for that. As for the end of the call—well, I was angry. The comment you made about me always paying so that I feel superior in the relationship really pissed me off. Because that’s not true. I know that I’ve grown up privileged, but I need you to understand that me offering to pay for your food, or flights, or anything else you need is not something I do to get validation.
“I genuinely want to help, and I’m trying to do that by showing you that you’re not alone in this relationship. It’s not fair for you to have to pay for every flight just to come see me. And if my schedule allowed it, I would come see you a hell of a lot more often. So yes, I was angry and I hung up. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you or that I want you gone.” He sighs and grabs my face in both his hands, bringing our foreheads together. “I love you all the time. Even when I’m irrationally mad.”
“I love you too.” I sniffle. “Can I kiss you?”
“One more thing, before we make up. If you need more affirmation that I am here to stay, I’ll give that to you. But I need you to understand that I’m not perfect, and I’ll make mistakes and get frustrated. And we’ll fight again, because that’s what healthy couples do.” He looks at me and I feel like he sees my soul down to its core. “So promise me, if you’re ever angry or annoyed, you’ll tell me what’s on your mind, and that you won’t hold it all inside.”
“I promise. And I’m sorry too. I should have handled that phone call better instead of snapping at you. We were both frustrated and I just felt bad for making us miss the trip.”
“It’s okay, I meant what I said earlier, all I want is to spend time with you. Besides, maybe now that Alice and Jordan are alone together they’ll finally admit their feelings for each other.”
I gasp and my eyes widen. “They went to the cabin?”
Robbie smiles. “They did. I gave Alice the truck and they left just in time to avoid some of the bad snow. I made her promise to call me with updates when they arrive.”
“Hmm, I do have to say, I’m low-key happy to have you all to myself.”
Robbie pulls me in his lap and my legs move to straddle him. Then I kiss him softly, almost shyly at first, until he deepens the kiss and shows me exactly how much he missed me. Our clothes end up in a heap on the floor and we don’t move off the couch until the cats finally find us and scream at us for food.
The storm keeps us inside for most of the week, which neither of us complains about. Alice texts me with some updates but she won’t make any comments when I ask about Jordan. Robbie stocked up the fridge and pantry before picking me up at the airport so the whole week we experimented with new recipes, watched TV together, and ended up having sex in almost every room of his house. Those poor cats have seen too much.
Last night we were talking about hockey and I happened to mention the Vermont team and how heated the last game was with them. Robbie got so mad just hearing about Mitchell again, reminding him of how he punched Ash at the beginning of the season and almost got him in trouble for it.
I was a coward and didn’t mention my own confrontation with Mitchell, but I think I have to tell him. Robbie has been nothing but honest with me and always asks me for my opinion when making decisions, so it’s only fair I do the same.
“Hey, babe, can I talk to you about something?” I say, approaching him on the couch where he is reading a book, dark frame glasses making him look sexy as hell, just like I knew they would.
“Yeah, what’s up?” he says, bookmarking the page and putting the book aside to give me his full attention. God, I love this man so much.
I nervously spin the ring on my right hand and sit down by his hip where he is lounging. “So, I meant to tell you this earlier, but I’ve been putting it off because I know you’ll get mad.”
He studies me with a furrow in his brow and says, “Tell me.”
“Well, about a week ago, I had that game at home that I officiated. Remember, we talked about it last night and you vented about how much of a dick Mitchell is?” He nods and clasps his fingers tightly in his lap. “Well, after the game, he was waiting for me and he cornered me at the arena.” I glance up at Robbie and see his jaw harden and his nostrils flare. He’s pissed.
“Did he lay a finger on you?” he asks through gritted teeth.
“No, of course not. He’s not stupid enough to do that,” I say and pause for a moment, taking a deep breath. Robbie doesn’t get the chance to relax before I say, “He basically blackmailed me.”
“What?” Robbie’s expression is shocked but also concerned and he grabs my hands in his. “What do you mean he blackmailed you? With what?”
I swallow and say, “He knows about us. Apparently he saw us at the hotel in Vermont last time we were there. He said he happened to be there and saw us holding hands. Either way, he told me he knows and that if I don’t start favoring his team more in the remaining games, he’s going to tell the AHL and get me fired.”
“That fucking asshole. He needs to be taught a lesson,” Robbie says.
“Absolutely not! Doing that would just prove him right.”
“How are you so calm about this? Your career is on the line if he tells everyone.”
“The thing is, I don’t know if I believe him. He didn’t say that he had proof, and if he did, he didn’t dangle it in my face. Which makes me think he’s bluffing. Even if he did see us at the same hotel, in the same elevator, holding hands or whatever, it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just his word against ours,” I say confidently.
“And if he does have proof?” Robbie asks warily.
“Then, I will accept whatever verdict the AHL gives me. I’m not going to break things off with you just because some idiot in Vermont has a small dick and an even smaller brain.”
Robbie bursts out laughing and I can’t help but join him. “Honestly, the only reason I didn’t tell you is because I didn’t want to worry you. I’m confident we can put up with him for the next couple months and then once you’re retired we don’t have to worry about it.”
“But you still have to be in the same games as him, unless he gets traded to another division. Aren’t you worried he’ll try to retaliate further?”
“No, I’ll be smart around him. Not let him rile me up. Beat him with kindness and penalties.”
Robbie chuckles and kisses me. “That’s my girl.”
“As for you, are you sure about retiring?” I ask, watching his face more closely. I really don’t want him to give up hockey for me.
He smiles and says, “Hold that thought. Let me go get my tablet.” He comes back and pulls up a presentation for the nonprofit. “Alex and I met last week, and we put this together.” The presentation is very thorough and talks about how they will collaborate with the Grand Marquee Manticores to set up auctions and fundraising events. “Things are becoming more official. Alex is doing most of it, but as soon as the season is over and I’m available, I plan to join him.”
“This is great, Robbie! You’re really excited for it.”
He gives me a bashful smile and I can see he’s going to be perfect at this. “Yeah. I really am.”