Chapter 5
Ella
Charlotte walks back to her bed and sits down. “I want to be friends, but only if you can be honest with me. I won’t be friends with someone who lies and thinks she has to hide stuff from me.”
I go over to her. “What would’ve happened if I’d told you?”
She looks down. “I probably wouldn’t talk to you.”
“So we’d be at the same place we’re at now. I know you’re mad that I lied, but I didn’t know how to tell you. And it all happened so fast. One day I hated Briggs and then I found myself liking him.”
“Why?” She looks at me as I sit beside her. “What changed?”
I wish I could tell her the truth. I don’t like lying to her, and I never have until just recently, when I was forced to keep this secret about the hit-and-run, which led to the secret about Briggs and me.
“We started spending time together,” I say.
“We had to meet to do our Chem assignments, and I don’t know what happened, but Briggs became someone totally different.
He wasn’t the guy we know from school. He was actually nice to me.
And it didn’t seem like an act. It seemed like he had this whole other side that he doesn’t like people to see.
That’s the guy I fell for, and the more time we spent together, the more I liked him. ”
“How did you end up . . . you know . . .”
“Kissing him?” I say, not wanting to bring up what she saw behind the bleachers.
“That. And other stuff.”
“The first time Briggs kissed me, it wasn’t real. It was just a way to make this guy go away. Remember that guy I went out with who wouldn’t take no for an answer?”
“Yeah. What about him?”
“Briggs and I went out to eat and talk about our assignment, and when we were leaving, I saw that guy in the parking lot. He came over to talk to me and Briggs pretended to be my boyfriend to make him go away.”
“Briggs actually said he was your boyfriend?”
“Yeah, I know — totally unlike him, right? But he did it to protect me. I told him I wanted the guy to leave me alone, and Briggs made sure that he would.” I smile. “He put his arm around me and made it seem like we were dating. Then he kissed me. It was all for show, but . . . I liked it. A lot.”
“I need details,” Charlotte says in an urgent tone. “What’s it like to kiss Briggs Chadwick?”
“I don’t think I should tell you. It’ll just make you hate me more.”
“I don’t hate you,” she says with a sigh. “I’m just jealous. I wanted it to be me.”
“I’m sorry, Charlotte. I really am.”
She shrugs. “I just have to get over it. He obviously doesn’t like me that way. He probably only invited me to that party to get to you.”
“I don’t think so. I’m telling you, this wasn’t planned. That kiss in the parking lot started something between us. We both felt it, even though we pretended it was nothing.”
“How’d you end up kissing for real?”
“You sure you want to hear this? I feel like it’s just going to make you feel worse.”
“Just tell me. If it gets to be too much, I’ll tell you to stop.”
I give her just enough of the story to satisfy her curiosity without going into too much detail.
She doesn’t ask questions, but instead just listens while I talk, seeming captivated by my every word.
I think she’s living out her fantasy of being with Briggs vicariously through me.
She’s going to be really disappointed when she finds out Briggs and I are over.
“I can’t believe you skipped school!” she says when I’m done telling the story. I ended it before I got to the scene behind the bleachers. Neither one of us needs to relive that.
“Briggs can be very persuasive,” I say. “I kept telling him I couldn’t do it and the next thing I know I’m telling Ms. Higgins I had a headache and had to leave.”
“And you just hung out at Briggs’ house all afternoon?”
“Yeah, by the pool. I can’t believe he never uses it.”
“He kissed you in the pool,” she says with a dreamy sigh.
He did more than that, but I left that part out of the story.
I didn’t want to tell her we almost did it in the pool.
I’d like to forget that ever happened. It was awkward and embarrassing, and not something I want to relive.
I also didn’t tell her what happened in his bedroom after we got out of the pool.
It’s more than she needs to know and something I’d like to keep between Briggs and me.
I really believed those intimate moments we shared were special, for both of us, but I guess I was the only one who felt that way.
“How did you go from kissing him to losing your virginity?” Charlotte asks.
“It just kind of happened,” I say, not wanting to tell her about that night. I told her a little but kept it vague, just saying it happened, and that’s it.
“How’d you feel after you did it?” Charlotte asks. “Did you regret it?”
“Not at all. It didn’t feel wrong or like I rushed into it. I don’t really know how to explain it other than that it felt right, like it was always supposed to happen that way.”
She stares at me. “Ella?”
“What?”
“I hate to tell you this, but I think you might be falling for Briggs.”
“Well, yeah, I wouldn’t have sex with a guy I didn’t like. But like I told you earlier, this wasn’t the Briggs from school. He was totally different. Kind. Caring. The first time we had sex he went really slow because he was so worried he’d hurt me. The Briggs from school wouldn’t even care.”
“That’s not what I meant. When I said you’re falling for him, I didn’t mean you just like him. I meant . . .” She pauses, looking hesitant.
“What? Just say it.”
“I think you might be falling in love with him.”
I laugh. “No. Not even close. I admit I fell for him, more than other guys I’ve dated, but I’m not in love with him. I’m not even talking to him anymore. That’s the part of the story I haven’t told you.”
I tell her about the city taking my house, and how Briggs convinced his father to get the city to do it.
“That doesn’t make sense,” Charlotte says. “Why would Briggs do that, knowing it would upset you?”
“Because it’s what he does. He lures you in so you trust him, then he turns against you. It’s all part of his game. The guy I was falling for never actually existed. He tricked me.”
“What if his father was lying? What if Briggs had nothing to do with it?”
“You sound like my dad. He said the same thing. He doesn’t even like Briggs, but for some reason he’s taking his side on this. He thinks Briggs’ dad made it up so I’d stop hanging out with Briggs. You know, the whole rich people only hang out with rich people thing?”
“You haven’t talked to Briggs since this happened?”
“What’s there to talk about? He can deny it all he wants, but I know he did it, or had a part in it. He hates my house. He hates having it on the same street as his mansion. It makes total sense he’d try to get rid of it.”
“I think you should at least listen to what he has to say.” She looks me in the eye. “Isn’t that what you wanted when you came here? For me to listen to you?”
“Yes, but it’s different with Briggs. He lies to trick people into trusting him so he can get what he wants from them.”
“Like what?”
I can’t tell her about the valedictorian thing, so what do I say? My brain is tired, and I can’t think.
“It doesn’t matter. The point is, Briggs can’t be trusted. Whatever we had together wasn’t real.”
“It sounded real.” She smiles. “I kind of hope you guys get back together. I’d love to see the look on Aubrey’s face when she finds out you’re dating Briggs.”
“Charlotte, you can’t tell anyone about this.”
“Why? This is your chance to finally get back at all the people who made fun of you. You’re dating the most popular guy in school — the guy every girl wants.”
“I’m not dating him, not anymore, and even if I was, I wouldn’t use it get back at people or to prove something. I stopped caring what people at school thought of me a long time ago.”
“Was that Briggs’ idea?” she asks. “To hide it?”
“We both decided it’d be better not to tell anyone. It’d cause too many problems at school.”
“For him, not you. It’s Briggs who risks looking bad for being with the girl he bullied.” She folds her arms over her chest. “I’m starting to not like him now. He shouldn’t be hiding this from people, like he’s ashamed or embarrassed to be with you.”
“He’s not hiding me. We’re not even dating. It’s over. Can we talk about something else? I haven’t talked to you forever. Tell me what’s going on with Asher. And what’s this concert he’s taking you to?”
Her face lights up as she tells me about Asher and how he loves classical music and plays four different instruments. Charlotte thinks it’s hot if a guy can play an instrument, so playing more than one means there’s a good chance Asher will be getting some action soon.
An hour later, we go get dinner, then come back to her house and talk some more.
I’m so relieved we worked things out. I didn’t want to lose Charlotte as a friend.
I didn’t want to lose my friendship with Briggs either, but I don’t see how it can be repaired after what he did.
And now he’s trying to take the valedictorian title from me again.
Why did I ever think he cared about me? He was just using me, and I let him.
* * *
Friday morning, I stride into AP Chem with a big smile on my face, ready to ace this exam and prove to Briggs he’s not getting the valedictorian title.
Briggs is in the back of the room, his head down as he messes with his phone.
He looks concerned. Maybe he got another mystery text.
I’m dying to know, but I doubt Briggs would tell me.
He’s back to the old Briggs, back to being an ass.
He’s probably plotting against me with Finn and Parker, trying to find a way to blame the hit-and-run on me so I’m the one who gets charged while the three of them go free.
Shit. What if that’s really happening? I could totally see them doing that. My dad can’t afford a fancy lawyer to defend me. If the guys tell the cops I was somehow responsible for what happened that night, there’s a good chance I’ll end up in jail.