Chapter 17
I have thirty minutes before I need to leave, and about an hour worth of things I need to do to be ready, so when Addie appeared in my doorway ten minutes ago ready to help me pick out what to wear for my date with Karen tonight, I wasn’t exactly annoyed this time.
Until she rejected half of my wardrobe.
“Uncle Will’s coming over tonight,” she says from her position on my bed, watching me go through the closet to find something she approves of. “Emmett too. We’re making him watch Stranger Things.”
“He’s never seen Stranger Things?”
“Can you believe it?” She shakes her head. “He said he’d heard of it, so at least there’s that.”
I pull out a black button-up I don’t remember buying.
“That one,” she says immediately.
“Really? This? Isn’t it a little… depressing?”
“Black is sexy. Karen will love it, trust me.”
I put it on, mostly because arguing with my daughter about fashion isn’t something I have time for today. And admittedly, it does look okay.
While I adjust my clothes, trying not to think about the other use for the mirror Will showed me, I can see her watching me with an odd look on her face.
“Dad,” she says, finally speaking up.
“Mhm?”
“Do you actually like Karen?”
I turn to face her, looking as good as I’m gonna get in the short amount of time I have. “What kind of question is that?”
She picks at a loose thread on my comforter, not meeting my eyes. “It’s not that I don’t like her. She seems nice, and she really likes you.”
“But?”
“But you don’t seem—” She tilts her head back and forth, searching for the word. “Excited, I guess. You don’t seem excited about her.”
I turn away from her, reaching for my watch on the dresser, knowing she’s right, but defending myself anyway. “We haven’t been seeing each other long, Addie. And it’s strange for me, with mom being gone and—”
“I know it must be hard for you, but I guess I’m asking if you feel anything for her.”
“I care about her,” I say, putting my watch on. “She’s a good woman.”
Addie pulls her knees up to her chest, resting her chin on them. “But Dad, you have to know that caring about someone and actually wanting to be with them aren’t the same thing.”
“I—” I pause because I’m not sure how I feel makes sense. “I don’t know how to be attracted to someone I don’t really know.”
“That’s okay,” she nods, like that makes any sense. “I don’t think you’re the only person who feels that way.” She gets up from the bed, coming to adjust my shirt some more, unbuttoning the top button. “The black looks good. Try to have fun tonight.”
After she’s gone, I look at myself in the mirror for another moment, and I can’t help but wonder if this is a mistake.
If I’ll ever get there with Karen.
Will arrives with two pizzas, letting himself in, and setting them on the counter like he lives here. From the living room, I can already hear Addie and Emmett arguing over who gets to control the remote, with Ollie joining in after a while.
I grab my keys off the island, trusting that Will has this handled, when a hand tugs on my shirt. “Woah, where do you think you’re going?”
“I have plans.”
He drops my shirt when I turn around, looking me up and down before he meets my eyes. “You’re going to see Karen.”
“Yes.”
“Didn’t you just see her?”
“That’s generally how dating works. You see them more than once.”
“But it’s family movie night.”
“You have fun with the kids, Addie’s really excited for you to watch—”
“Cancel.”
“I’m not canceling.”
I think that’s it. But when I start toward the garage door, I feel his hand go to my back pocket, coming back out with my phone. “You cancel,” he says, turning it right on, and I’m really wishing I had a password right now. “Or I will.”
“Give me my phone. You’re not canceling my plans.”
He taps the screen, looking at something I can’t see. “Dear Karen, sorry I can’t make it, my sexy brother-in-law, who I have a massive crush on—”
“Give me my phone.”
He holds it out of reach, our very little difference in height giving him the advantage. “Are you gonna stay?”
“Will, I can’t. We’ve had these plans—”
“Wouldn’t you rather be here?” He tilts his head, giving me that look he knows bypasses any sort of good judgment I might have. “With me?”
“That’s— I can’t—”
“Think about it.” He steps closer, and I step back into the counter, fully aware that my kids are right in the other room. “You stay here, and I might give you something you want even more…”
“That’s not fair,” I complain, squirming when he presses his body against mine.
“Seems pretty fair to me.”
I look at my phone in his hand. At his face. His smirk. Back to his hands.
It’s been three days since the restaurant, and I’m already desperate for him again, and the lack of distance between us right now isn’t making that need go away. So, as anyone would in my situation, I take the phone.
I know I’ve made the right decision when he smiles, handing me the phone to watch me type a text to Karen.
Nolan: I’m so sorry for the late notice, but something came up with the kids. Can we reschedule?
“Good choice.”
“I hate you.”
“We’ll see about that,” Will says, grabbing a slice of pizza and heading to the living room, leaving me no choice but to follow him since, apparently, I’m staying home tonight.
We devour the pizza in record time, before we’ve even turned on the show. Karen texted me a few minutes ago, saying it was all good and asking if the kids are okay. I feel terrible. I’m genuinely a horrible human being who lied to the woman I’m dating so I could spend time with a man who hates me.
Who I—
“Hey,” Will says, standing up and grabbing his keys out of his jacket pocket, thrown across a chair. “Who wants ice cream?”
“I do,” Ollie says, bouncing up and down like he didn’t eat three pieces of pizza the size of his head.
Will tosses his keys to Addie, who barely catches them in time. “Why don’t you kids go pick some up. Here, take my car.”
Addie’s face does many things at once. Astonishment, confusion, excitement. “Are you serious?”
“Don’t wreck it.”
“I won’t!”
“On second thought, maybe let Emmett drive,” Will says. “He seems more responsible.”
Her cheeks turn red with the force of her outrage. “That is so sexist, Uncle Will, oh my god! I am an excellent driver—”
I make a small sound of disagreement, remembering the many times she almost killed me and her brother learning to drive. And the two times she failed her driving test.
“Dad!”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“Both of you are unbelievable.” She stomps toward the stairs. “Ollie, get your shoes. Emmett, you’re not driving.”
Five minutes later, the front door closes, and we’re alone.
I gather the plates, taking them to the kitchen for something to do, and Will follows me, pressing his body against my back, his hands landing on my hips. He kisses my neck once and then my ear before whispering, “Don’t ever say I never did anything for you.”
“How is bribing my children with ice cream—”
He kisses me again, taking his time, moving down my neck, sucking hard enough that he might leave a mark, but nothing like the day he covered my neck in hickeys, leaving me to dress like it was the middle of winter for a week.
“I like you in this shirt,” he says, sliding his hand around to my stomach. The words shock me. He’s never given me a compliment before. Usually he’s insulting me. Even when we’re like this.
He hates me.
But before I can say anything about it, he’s pushing my pants down. In the kitchen. “What are you—”
“Stay there,” he says, holding me still when I try to turn around.
And then he drops to his knees behind me.
“Will.” I look over my shoulder. “What the hell are you doing?”
He doesn’t even look up at me, keeping his eyes glued to my bare skin. “I’ve been thinking about this ass for months.”
“You— what?”
“You should see yourself in those damn scrubs.” He shakes his head, gripping my ass with both hands, spreading me before I can prepare myself for what he’s about to do. “Fuck.”
“I—that’s not—Will—” I’m gripping the counter with both hands, staring out the window as a car drives by, unaware of what’s happening inside my house. “What are you— are you going to—”
I can’t speak. Will’s hands are on me, spreading me open, and I’ve never been, no one’s ever—
“Relax,” he says, against my skin, kissing me where no one has ever kissed me before, and I don’t think relaxing is possible for me right now because he’s spreading me even more, and is that his—
I don’t have words for what’s happening.
I cling to the cold metal of the sink as Will’s tongue touches me there. I want to crawl out of my heated skin. To squirm away from the strange feeling. I want him to stop.
I want him to never stop.
“Will,” I manage to say, and it doesn’t even sound like me when he presses his tongue against my hole, digging his fingers into my skin. “Stop— You can’t—”
“Mm-mm,” he says against me, but the vulnerability of this position is too much. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with my body or my mouth or anything. I want him to stop, I think.
But God.
This feels good.
I accept my fate, relaxing into him, letting him give me whatever he wants to give. I can be embarrassed about it later. Right now, I need more.
I reach down to grip my cock, pressed against the cabinets, and I know that if someone walked by the house right now, they’d see me, my face, as Will uses his tongue to do unspeakable things.
And they would know.
“Uh-uh, no,” Will says, pulling back for the first time when I begin to stroke myself. “Don’t touch. You come like this or not at all.”
The sound I make is nothing but a cry. “I can’t, Will, please, they’ll be back soon.”
“Not my problem.”
“But I don’t think I can—”
He does something, interrupting my words with his tongue, sliding inside of me as far as it can go, and I think I might be dying. “Still can’t?” he says, pulling back, and all I can do is groan, pressing back against him for more.