Chapter 4 #2
I looked out of the window; it was dark now, so I could see nothing but our reflections.
She was much shorter than me but still taller than the average woman, which was natural for elves.
Still, I wanted to pick her up, have her wrap her legs around me.
I wanted to finally kiss her, lay her back on the dining table, and do things to her that I’d only dreamed about.
It was time to tell her everything. Leave no more confusion.
“My father wanted us to marry. Actually, both our parents wanted us to be married. I’d heard them talk to each other about it when we were in college.
I adamantly resisted, and it was the one thing my father allowed me to do. Secure your freedom and safety.”
Camilla blew out a breath, eyes spanning the room before she spoke again. “Wow, didn’t know that. I would have liked to know all this when it happened.”
I turned to fully face her. “It wouldn’t have mattered because there were no other options that made risking your happiness worth it.
I don’t think you get it, Cammy. I have loved you since we were ten.
” She stilled, and I proceeded carefully, knowing this would be a lot for her, but I’d waste no more time.
Not when we had this opportunity, as dark as it was.
“With you, I could be every part of who I was, and you never cared. I got sad, and you just hugged me. I got things wrong, and you didn’t call me stupid.
You never used me like so many. Including my family.
And you were so unapologetically you. So free spirited and kind, but headstrong.
I cherished your presence. How could I not love you?
And because of that, how could I subject you to a life of being married to a criminal?
I’d have to lock you away. Cage you from harm.
From the darkness that this life would drown you in.
That would make me a monster. It’s what my dad did to my mother, and make no mistake, he would expect me to be the same with you.
He would control you just like he did everyone else.
Including your family. And if he hadn’t been killed, I think I would have fully become just like him in time.
Especially if he were able to change you for the worse.
So no, I declined any idea of being with you then because I had to protect you.
From my family. From me. Your parents had no idea how dark my life was. ”
Camilla shook her head, her eyes watery.
Was I making her cry? That isn’t what I wanted.
I just needed her to understand that my feelings for her weren’t new.
“I knew it was rough. We heard enough stories. Maybe my parents were blinded by the access we got from being family friends. Or they were just so used to the life themselves that they thought I could as well.” She gulped back the rest of her drink.
I watched her silently for a moment, allowing her to process all that I said.
“All that time I thought I wasn’t your type, even if I did have a crush on you. ”
Now that made me happy to hear. To know that I wasn’t alone in this.
It gave me the confidence to say what I needed to say.
I put my drink down on the counter and walked closer to her.
I then placed my hands on either side of her, resting them on the counter and effectively trapping her closer to me.
She looked up at me with wide eyes. “Camilla Robinson, you’ve always been my type.
Do you know how fucking perfect you are?
I never dated a woman who looked like you because they would never hold up, and it would be frustrating for me to be with anyone who remotely reminded me of you.
Your gaze stirs my soul. Your lips tempt me.
Every curve of you drives me to distraction.
Your scent intoxicates me. The softness of your skin lingers on my fingertips.
” I bent closer to her until I was inches from her, griping the counter.
Tempting myself with the nearness of her.
“I’ve wanted no one else but you. Ever. I belong to you. ”
I then stepped back to watch her reaction. Her mouth dropped open, eyes widening. So much for baby steps, but I could not have her confusion linger. “Harris,” she breathed my name in a barely audible voice that made me shiver.
I took her almost finished drink from her and set it down on the counter. Then I placed her hands on my chest. “I know I said a lot. If you don’t have feelings for me, then push me away. This will be your only chance to do so. And it won’t change how much I will protect you.”
She smirked up at me. “You’re much bigger than me. I don’t think I can.”
I raised my hands in the air as if to surrender so she could move me, although it would break me if she did. “The slightest push and I’ll fall back. Are you going to push me away, baby?”
She looked at her hands on my chest and then slowly back up to me.
Then she shook her head.