Chapter 9
The rover has no toilet. We were expected to use our suits’ reclamation systems for that. But they aren’t designed to hold twenty days’ worth of output.
My morning piss goes in a resealable plastic box. When I open it, the rover reeks like a truck-stop men’s room. I could take it outside and let it boil off. But I worked hard to make that water, and the last thing I’m going to do is waste it. I’ll feed it to the water reclaimer when I get back.
Even more precious is my manure. It’s critical to the potato farm, and I’m the only source on Mars. Fortunately, when you spend a lot of time in space, you learn how to shit in a bag. And if you think things are bad after opening the piss box, imagine the smell after I drop anchor.
After I’m done with that lovely routine, I go outside and collect the solar cells. Why didn’t I do it the previous night? Because trying to dismantle and stack solar cells in total darkness isn’t fun. I learned that the hard way.
After securing the cells, I come back in, turn on some shitty seventies music, and start driving.
I putter along at 25 kph, the rover’s top speed.
It’s comfortable inside. I wear hastily made cutoffs and a thin shirt while the RTG bakes the interior.
When it gets too hot I detach the insulation duct-taped to the hull.
When it gets too cold, I tape it back up.
I can go almost two hours before the first battery runs out. I do a quick EVA to swap cables, then I’m back at the wheel for the second half of the day’s drive.
The terrain is very flat. The undercarriage of the rover is taller than any of the rocks around here, and the hills are gently sloping affairs, smoothed by eons of sandstorms.
When the other battery runs out, it’s time for another EVA. I pull the solar cells off the roof and lay them on the ground. For the first few sols, I lined them up in a row. Now I plop them wherever, trying to keep them close to the rover out of sheer laziness.
Then comes the incredibly dull part of my day.
I sit around for twelve hours with nothing to do.
And I’m getting sick of this rover. The inside’s the size of a van.
That may seem like plenty of room, but try being trapped in a van for eight days.
I look forward to tending my potato farm in the wide open space of the Hab.
I’m nostalgic for the Hab. How fucked up is that?
I have shitty seventies TV to watch, and a bunch of Poirot novels to read.
But mostly I spend my time thinking about getting to Ares4.
I’ll have to do it someday. How the hell am I going to survive a 3200-kilometer trip in this thing?
It’ll probably take fifty days. I’ll need the water reclaimer and the oxygenator, maybe some of the Hab’s main batteries, then a bunch more solar cells to charge everything…
.Where will I put it all? These thoughts pester me throughout the long, boring days.
Eventually, it gets dark and I get tired.
I lie among the food packs, water tanks, extra O 2 tank, piles of CO 2 filters, box of pee, bags of shit, and personal items. I have a bunch of crew jumpsuits to serve as bedding, along with my blanket and pillow.
Basically, I sleep in a pile of junk every night.
Speaking of sleep…G’night.
LOG ENTRY: SOL 80
By my reckoning, I’m about 100 kilometers from Pathfinder . Technically it’s “Carl Sagan Memorial Station.” But with all due respect to Carl, I can call it whatever the hell I want. I’m the King of Mars.
As I mentioned, it’s been a long, boring drive. And I’m still on the outward leg. But hey, I’m an astronaut. Long-ass trips are my business.
Navigation is tricky.
The Hab’s nav beacon only reaches 40 kilometers, so it’s useless to me out here. I knew that’d be an issue when I was planning this little road trip, so I came up with a brilliant plan that didn’t work.
The computer has detailed maps, so I figured I could navigate by landmarks. I was wrong. Turns out you can’t navigate by landmarks if you can’t find any god damned landmarks.
Our landing site is at the delta of a long-gone river.
NASA chose it because if there are any microscopic fossils to be had, it’s a good place to look.
Also, the water would have dragged rock and soil samples from thousands of kilometers away.
With some digging, we could get a broad geological history.
That’s great for science, but it means the Hab’s in a featureless wasteland .
I considered making a compass. The rover has plenty of electricity, and the med kit has a needle. Only one problem: Mars doesn’t have a magnetic field.
So I navigate by Phobos. It whips around Mars so fast it actually rises and sets twice a day, running west to east. It isn’t the most accurate system, but it works.
Things got easier on Sol 75. I reached a valley with a rise to the west. It had flat ground for easy driving, and I just needed to follow the edge of the hills. I named it “Lewis Valley” after our fearless leader. She’d love it there, geology nerd that she is.
Three sols later, Lewis Valley opened into a wide plain. So, again, I was left without references and relied on Phobos to guide me. There’s probably symbolism there. Phobos is the god of fear, and I’m letting it be my guide. Not a good sign.
But today, my luck finally changed. After two sols wandering the desert, I found something to navigate by.
It was a five-kilometer crater, so small it didn’t even have a listed name.
But it was on the maps, so to me it was the Lighthouse of Alexandria.
Once I had it in sight, I knew exactly where I was.
I’m camped near it now, as a matter of fact.
I’m finally through the blank areas of the map. Tomorrow, I’ll have the Lighthouse to navigate by, and Hamelin crater later on. I’m in good shape.
Now on to my next task: sitting around with nothing to do for twelve hours.
I better get started!
LOG ENTRY: SOL 81
Almost made it to Pathfinder today, but I ran out of juice. Just another 22 kilometers to go!
An unremarkable drive. Navigation wasn’t a problem. As Lighthouse receded into the distance, the rim of Hamelin crater came into view.
I left Acidalia Planitia behind a long time ago. I’m well into Ares Vallis now. The desert plains are giving way to bumpier terrain, strewn with ejecta that never got buried by sand. It makes driving a chore; I have to pay more attention.
Up till now, I’ve been driving right over the rock-strewn landscape.
But as I travel farther south, the rocks are getting bigger and more plentiful.
I have to go around some of them or risk damage to my suspension.
The good news is I don’t have to do it for long.
Once I get to Pathfinder , I can turn around and go the other way.
The weather’s been very good. No discernible wind, no storms. I think I got lucky there. There’s a good chance my rover tracks from the past few sols are intact. I should be able to get back to Lewis Valley just by following them.
After setting up the solar panels today, I went for a little walk. I never left sight of the rover; the last thing I want to do is get lost on foot. But I couldn’t stomach crawling back into that cramped, smelly rat’s nest. Not right away.
It’s a strange feeling. Everywhere I go, I’m the first. Step outside the rover? First guy ever to be there! Climb a hill? First guy to climb that hill! Kick a rock? That rock hadn’t moved in a million years!
I’m the first guy to drive long-distance on Mars. The first guy to spend more than thirty-one sols on Mars. The first guy to grow crops on Mars. First, first, first!
I wasn’t expecting to be first at anything.
I was the fifth crewman out of the MDV when we landed, making me the seventeenth person to set foot on Mars.
The egress order had been determined years earlier.
A month before launch, we all got tattoos of our “Mars numbers.” Johanssen almost refused to get her “15” because she was afraid it would hurt.
Here’s a woman who had survived the centrifuge, the vomit comet, hard-landing drills and 10k runs.
A woman who fixed a simulated MDV computer failure while being spun around upside-down. But she was afraid of a tattoo needle.
Man, I miss those guys.
Jesus Christ, I’d give anything for a five-minute conversation with anyone. Anyone, anywhere. About anything.
I’m the first person to be alone on an entire planet.
Okay, enough moping. I am having a conversation with someone: whoever reads this log. It’s a bit one-sided but it’ll have to do. I might die, but damn it, someone will know what I had to say.
And the whole point of this trip is to get a radio. I could be reconnected with mankind before I even die.
So here’s another first: Tomorrow I’ll be the first person to recover a Mars probe.
LOG ENTRY: SOL 82
Victory! I found it!
I knew I was in the right area when I spotted Twin Peaks in the distance. The two small hills are under a kilometer from the landing site. Even better, they were on the far side of the site. All I had to do was aim for them until I found the lander.
And there it was! Right where it was supposed to be! I excitedly stumbled out and rushed to the site.
Pathfinder ’s final stage of descent was a balloon-covered tetrahedron. The balloons absorbed the impact of landing. Once it came to rest, they deflated, and the tetrahedron unfolded to reveal the probe.
It’s actually two separate components. The lander itself, and the Sojourner rover. The lander was immobile, while Sojourner wandered around and got a good look at the local rocks. I’m taking both back with me, but the important part is the lander. That’s the part that can communicate with Earth.
I can’t explain how happy I was to find it. It was a lot of work to get here, and I’d succeeded.