Chapter 10
ten
“You don’t have to share if you’re not ready,” I rushed out, nerves trembling in my voice.
“You’ve been kind about the oddness of my current color. You never gawked or prodded me for answers about my vision like most people do. I’ve given you openings, but you’ve made it clear my privacy means more to you than your curiosity.”
“I figured you would tell me if you wanted me to know.”
“It’s not a matter of wanting to burden you, but you do deserve to know.”
“I’m waiting.” I gripped his hand, resting it on my thigh. “Take your time.”
“Liam wasn’t wrong when he said reports of your death ruined me.
I did a lot of things I don’t remember and things I wish I didn’t remember while I was grieving.
” His hand turned cold in mine. “What he didn’t mention, because he never speaks of it outside the family, was what pulled me out of my spiral. ”
“He said turning you into a workaholic was the cure.”
“That was part of it, but I required a catalyst, and he found one for me.”
A hard thump in my chest warned I wasn’t going to like what he had to say. “Okay?”
“I wouldn’t believe you were alive without proof, and there was none to be found. So, we visited a black witch who promised she could locate you. For a price.”
Dread carved my stomach hollow, and I wished I could go back in time and shake sense into him. “Rían…”
“I gave her my vision, with the stipulation I got five years after I found you before I go blind. The second sight she granted me, allowing me to track you, required a deposit of one quarter of my vision upfront.” He breathed easier, as if a great weight had fallen off his shoulders. “That’s the bargain.”
“Can you renegotiate?” I couldn’t swallow past the lump in my throat. “The payment or the terms?”
“That’s not how it works. Magic that powerful requires sacrifice.
Sartori had hidden you under layers of complex spells and wards.
That’s why I couldn’t find you. He was smart enough to use white magic too.
It’s weaker, but it’s socially acceptable, and it wouldn’t draw attention like black magic would. ”
Brain stumbling over this latest information, I blurted, “I don’t smell it on you.”
Black magic stank of death and rot, and Rían carried neither of those scents.
“You can thank Fayne for that. She concealed it to prevent the clan from learning what I had done.” His gaze drifted back to the stars.
“She believes if I continue to lead them as I have, that they’ll see I can do the job with or without my vision.
I was in no condition to argue the point with her back then, and I had already left a mess behind when I ran away to wallow, so I trusted her judgment. Maguri are advisors, after all.”
“You sound like you would have done it differently.”
“Had I been in my right mind, I would have told the clan everything and thrown myself on their mercy. But I wasn’t, and I didn’t, and now there’s this festering lie separating me from the others.
Fayne stands by her decision, and it did make sense under the circumstances, especially with me striving to live up to the clan’s expectations as the youngest magnus to rule. ”
“You know what your problem is, Rían?”
“I’m sure there’s a laundry list of them.”
“You’re too good.” I ignored his scoff. “I mean it.”
“I just told you I bartered my sight away to a black witch.”
“Burdock has told me enough stories for me to realize you and Liam were a lot more alike than I realized when you were kids. I figured you put away childish things when you ascended to magnus, but even that wouldn’t explain the lockdown on your emotions or the leniency you show Liam.
It’s almost like you’re letting him be obnoxious enough for the both of you, and he knows it, so he’s always out to one up himself in your honor. ”
“For someone who thinks she doesn’t read people well, you’re painfully insightful.”
The truth was that anyone with a volatile homelife became an expert at reading people.
Empathy, some called it, and maybe it was, but it stemmed from awareness earned by living with someone or someones whose emotional state became the barometer for your own life.
To enter a room and pause to gauge the moods of those around you became habit.
Not because it was a superpower but a survival instinct.
“Any other skeletons in your closet? Dark pacts? Blood oaths? Questionable streaming memberships? Anything else I should know going into this?”
“This being a relationship with me.” He studied me for a long time. “You’re not obligated, you know.”
“I’m aware, and if you keep throwing that in my face, I’m going to think you’re looking for a way out.”
“Never.”
“Then let’s move forward and stop looking back.”
“Easy as that?”
“Hell no. Nothing worth having is easy. But I am willing to work on it. With you.”
“Can I hold you?” He flexed his fingers around mine. “Just for a minute?”
“I might even give you two,” I said, lying next to him and resting my head on his shoulder.
The hard muscle shouldn’t have made a good pillow, but I conked out the second my eyes shut.
Bright light stabbed me in the eye, and I cracked open a lid, expecting to find a flashlight in my face with an irate Sloane on the other end of it. But this was worse. Much worse. Rían and I had fallen asleep on the lawn. The flashlight? Yeah. It was the sun. Beaming right into my skull.
I attempted to sit up, but the weight of his arm kept me pinned against his side.
Judging from the warm spot on my face (and the damp spot on his shirt), dreams had consumed him shortly after they gobbled me down.
He was breathing deeply, his expression wiped clear.
He growled when I wiggled to escape, a faint rumble that puckered his brow, and I couldn’t help myself.
Sleeping Rían was adorable.
“Aww,” a small voice complained behind us. “I wanted to camp out too.”
“You were grounded,” Sloane explained gently. “You’ll have to camp out next time.”
“They didn’t even use a tent.” Goldie tapped her chin. “I would have loaned them mine for ten dollars.”
“That’s a very generous offer.” Sloane barely held in her laughter. “How much for the sleeping bags?”
“Five dollars each? Another five for the electric lantern. I have a camp stove too.”
As the tally climbed higher, I decided I should wake Rían before Goldie rang up our future purchases.
“Rise and shine.” I gripped his shoulder, my pillow, and shook. “Time to face the day. And your sister.”
“Umph.” He rolled against my hip and looped his arms around me. “No.”
An evil grin stretched Sloane’s cheeks as she mouthed a cure for the problem then hustled Goldie inside.
“We slept together last night,” I told Rían, lips brushing his ear, “and Goldie walked in on us.”
“Fuck.” He shot upright, wild-eyed, groping his lap for, I assume, a sheet. “Goldie, I—”
Confusion twisted his features as adrenaline jolted him wide awake. His expression didn’t clear when his fingers scrunched grass instead of mattress. He swung his head as if to clear it then froze as understanding trickled in.
“We fell asleep in the yard,” he groaned, rubbing the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Goldie?”
“Sloane took her inside before I woke you.” I patted his back. “The only thing she saw were dollar signs for the next time we camp out, when she plans to loan us the necessary equipment. For a price.”
A commotion on the other side of the fence drew my attention seconds before the front door banged open and footsteps slapped in our direction.
Liam burst into the yard wearing a scowl.
For once, it was aimed at Rían instead of me.
I took advantage and stood before he got near enough to loom over me. Except—crap—he came straight for me.
“Just so you don’t punch me,” Liam said, hands held in front of him. “I’m going to hug you now.”
Hug? Me? This must be a trick. A move to get in close and take me down before I put up a fight.
“Um.” I took a healthy step back. “That’s okay. I’m good. Thanks for offering.”
“This will be good for you.” Sloane emerged with Goldie holding her hand. “Y’all kiss and make up.”
“No kissing,” Rían grumbled, rising with a swallowed growl.
“Sloane,” Goldie reprimanded her in a firm and adult tone. “Don’t ruin this.”
Ah.
I got it now.
This was the result of leaving Goldie alone with her thoughts overnight. She instigated this. She wanted Liam and me to make up so I had no reason to run away. And Liam, well, that he hadn’t balked at being ordered to kiss me proved his remorse extended beyond what Goldie was projecting onto him.
“I am willing to hug it out.” I ignored the robotic cadence in my voice. “For Rían, and for Goldie.”
Slowly, like two stags about to lock horns, Liam and I circled one another until a loaded sigh from the peanut gallery stopped us in our tracks. We walked forward, arms going around each other’s shoulders, and embraced to loud whoops and a few whistles.
“I really am sorry,” he whispered, though I was sure Rían would hear him from so close.
“I saw Rían, and I panicked. I shouldn’t have used that tone with you or made you think for a second it was your fault.
It’s a weak excuse, but I almost lost him once, and it was like the past and present colliding with you there.
That didn’t give me the right to blame you for what happened then, or for what’s happening now. ”
“He told me—” I held on when his muscles pulled taut, “—about the bargain.”
“Tell me you’re in this with him,” he said, his breath tickling my ear, “and I will never make you doubt me again.” His chin dipped lower. “Even if you can’t do that, I’ll do better. I promise. I won’t make this harder on you than it’s already been. Just…don’t leave him. Please.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” I brought him close for a real hug. “I’m all in.”
“That’s the kind of thing you should tell Rían,” Sloane shouted, “and not his loser cousin.”