24. NICK
“Izzy…” I called after the gorgeous woman walking fast in front of me. I didn’t know what to say to her after a week of burying myself in my work and ignoring her on purpose. Again.
She didn’t respond. With the orchids and roses still in her hand, she rushed forward without looking back.
The cheers were still ringing in my ears as I followed her to the backstage area, my mind and heart swirling with inexplicable emotions. The dressing room door closed behind her, leaving me standing in the hallway, wondering what to do next.
The backstage buzzed with activity as crew members hurriedly prepared for the next segment of the event. I took a moment to collect my thoughts before knocking lightly on Izzy’s door.
I thought she wouldn’t open it or talk to me anymore, and I could not blame her. But then, I heard her voice. My heart skipped a beat.
“Come in,” her voice called from inside.
I entered cautiously, finding her in front of a mirror and adjusting her hair and makeup. She met my gaze in the reflection, her eyes revealing a storm of emotions.
“Congratulations, Izzy. That was an incredible speech,” I began, trying to ease the tension.
“Thank you,” she replied tersely, not meeting my eyes.
I hesitated before speaking again. “Izzy, we need to talk.”
She scoffed. “Yeah, no doubt about it,” she answered sarcastically.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch,” I started hesitantly.
She turned to face me; her expression guarded. “Now’s not the time, Nick. We have a show to finish.”
“Look, I know you’re upset,” I admitted, “and I understand why. But this partnership means a lot to me, and I don’t want to jeopardize it.”
She sighed; the frustration evident in her eyes. I had expected her to be angry, but the deep disappointment on her pretty face was even more painful. “Nick, you can’t just appear out of nowhere, hand me flowers, and expect everything to be okay. I’m sick and tired of it. And what do you mean by partnership? Don’t worry, our business won’t suffer because of this.”
“Izzy, I didn’t mean to blindside you. I went straight here from a meeting because I wanted to show my support for you and EcoChic. I’m sorry for the past week. I was very busy.”
“Too busy to reply to my messages?”
“I…”
“After you hinted at a romance during the gala in front of the media, then you vanish. I’m left without a clue as to what that meant. Or was it just a publicity stunt for you?” Her tone was dripping with sarcasm.
“No, Izzy. It wasn’t, believe me. But I don’t know why I said that, or what came over me…it just felt right at the time. I was speaking from…well, never mind.”
I was speaking from my heart, Izzy. Because I care about you. Too damn much.
She looked disappointed, and my heart went out to her. Fuck me. I’m just really bad at this.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated. I couldn’t make myself express the truth.
She softened a bit, but she remained cautious. “It’s not just about the flowers or about today, Nick. It’s about us, and you disappearing when I need you. That comment sure stirred up the press, and it was so hard to get them off my back while you…” She took a deep breath before continuing. “I don’t know where the hell you’d disappeared to.”
I drew in a long, steady breath, acknowledging my mistake. “I messed up, Izzy. I should have been there for you. I want to make things right, but I need you to understand that this partnership is important to me, too.”
“Are you talking about the business or something else?” She looked at me with exasperation, her eyes searching for sincerity.
A knock came on the door. “Miss Turner? You’re needed outside now.”
Izzy stood up and simply left the room without saying anything anymore.
Later, I went back outside and interacted a little with business associates and some fashion industry big guns. But from the corner of my eye, I was watching Izzy basking in the success of the launch—the realization of her dreams. She looked radiant, and a part of me was proud of her success. Yet, another part felt like I was holding her back.
“Isabelle Turner, the woman I’ve been dying to meet!” I heard one of the men say to her.
She smiled at him politely. “It’s good to meet you too.”
“Care for a drink?”
She hesitated and then made some excuse. A few admirers had come to surround her, some of them blatantly flirting with her. She looked as if she needed rescuing because she wasn’t interested at all. Luckily, my brother swooped in.
Dan to the rescue, I thought. Maybe he’s better for her than me. I should just stay away, perhaps. She doesn’t deserve how I’ve treated her.
The decision weighed heavily on me. One part of me was screaming not to leave again, while the other part of me wanted to scramble away and never show myself again.
I have to at least say goodbye, I figured. I don’t want her to think I’m disappearing again just like that after I had already apologized for leaving before. Fuck. Why am I like this?
It was Dan who saw me first as I was approaching. This time, I was glad he was there to entertain her, to stand by her side.
“Hey, bro! For someone who struck it rich again in a business investment…or rather, a business partner who’s gorgeous and intelligent and talented…” He winked at Izzy whose expression was unreadable, before turning back to me again. “You look as if you’re in a funeral rather than in your business’s successful launch! What’s up? Why the long face?”
“Just tired.”
“Story of your life.”
“Yeah, well. That’s me.” I glanced at Izzy who was giving me a pained look. Maybe she knew what I was about to do. “Izzy, as much as I’d love to stay some more, I can’t. I’m so sorry, but I just remembered there’s something important I need to do.”
“Nick is a very important person,” Dan quipped jokingly.
I simply ignored him. “Thanks for all your hard work, Izzy. Congratulations, you deserve everything you’ve got going for you and much more.”
She looked alarmed at first, and then it dawned on her that perhaps I was talking about something else. About us.
“Okay, thanks for dropping by.” That was all she said. In a flat voice.
“Bye, twin brother,” Dan said, waving. As I made my way to the exit, I could hear their voices as they continued chatting. Izzy seemed to be okay, and I was glad.
I went home and sat down on my home office chair, plunging myself into work. I poured myself a glass of wine and tried to relax my nerves. Then I turned off my phone, shutting out the world. With closed eyes, I tried to escape the chaos of my own emotions, questioning my actions, and resenting the patterns I seemed unable to break.