94. Chapter 94
Chapter 94
“Look what came in the mail today,” Paige said to David, handing him an envelope that had already been opened.
It was shortly after the new year, and despite Jacob now being in pre-kindergarten, Paige was still staying at home. When he started school, she’d thought about looking for another job, but it was a fleeting thought, and as the months passed, so did any real desire to work outside the home.
David had been able to take advantage of her being around during the day by coming upstairs to have lunch several times a week with her (and when the stars aligned, engage in an energetic quickie). Today, however, based on her rigid posture and dark expression, the stars were not aligning.
Wondering what he was going to find, David took the envelope and pulled out a folded piece of paper, along with a check made payable to Paige in the amount of $16,000 dollars. He actually looked at it twice, to make sure of the amount.
Opening the folded paper, he began to read.
Paige:
Congratulations on your wedding last summer. I wish you and David all the best in your marriage.
I know you don’t want to see me, and as such, I’ll respect your wishes, but that doesn’t mean I won’t hope you change your mind someday. I realize how wrong it was for me to show up like I did, unannounced on your birthday, and I apologize for that.
One thing I’d wanted to talk to you about that day, but didn’t get the chance, was the financial settlement of Carter’s estate. After everything was sold and liquidated, it turned out to be a fairly substantial amount, after taxes. Given how upset you are with me, I can only assume you’re not going to be receptive to accepting this check, but I’m going to give it to you, anyway. I’ll be gifting you the maximum amount that I can (in accordance with tax guidelines) every year, until there isn’t any left. Should I die before then, per the trust I’ve had drawn up, you will receive the rest of it—as well as any of my remaining assets—as my sole beneficiary.
I want you to have this money, to spend in any way you choose. In the event you do refuse it, however, know that the money will simply go into an investment account, which will then become yours when I die.
I know the mistakes I’ve made. I do. And while I can hope someday you’ll be able to forgive me for how badly I treated you, I don’t expect you to, especially since I won’t ever be able to forgive myself.
I truly wish you every happiness, and implore you to take this money. Do something good with it for yourself and your new family.
I love you,
Claire
After David read the note, he folded it, put it back in the envelope, and set it on the counter with the check. He then went to Paige and held her from behind, waiting for her to speak.
“I don’t want to take it,” she finally said. “She’s giving it to me to alleviate her guilt.”
“Maybe.” At her quick twist to look at him with disbelief, he amended it to, “Probably.”
“Well, I don’t want to help alleviate her guilt in any way. I want it to burn inside her with the heat of a thousand suns for all of eternity.”
“So do I. But, I don’t think taking a little bit of money from her once a year is going to make a dent in her guilt.”
“So, you think I should take the money,” Paige murmured.
“Well, she’s apparently going to give it to you one way or the other, so taking some of it every year doesn’t seem like a big deal to me. That being said, I totally understand why you wouldn’t want to take the money, but I can also see the benefits if you were to take it. For one, you did say you should’ve sent Claire the bill for your extra therapy, right?”
Paige released a short, amused breath. “I did say that. And that check just about covers it.”
“Then you should totally cash the check because she owes you for that.” He paused for a few seconds, before continuing. “And I know it’s Carter’s money, but it could be used for something good, like Claire said. It could be used for anything, to do whatever you wanted. You could take your deserving family on an amazing trip once a year, anywhere in the world. You could get a large, ornate tattoo of your husband’s name on your body …” he trailed off to slide his hand down to just above where the groomed line of her pubic hair was. “I’m thinking here would be the perfect spot, so I could see my name every time I go down on you.”
“Hmm. That’s certainly an interesting idea … one I probably never would’ve thought of on my own.”
“I’m full of them, actually.”
“Oh, really? Well, why don’t you lay a few more on me, then?”
After another brief pause, he told her, “If you ever felt like going back to work, you could start your own business as a wedding consultant. We could convert the upstairs floor into an office for you—after getting rid of a bunch of shit, obviously. You could hire Andrea to be your assistant, Kim to be your part-time photographer, and your woman-owned, woman-employed business would drive a stake in Linda’s cold, black heart and put her out of business.”
“Hmm, that actually would be really appealing. And I mean all of it, not just the part about Linda.”
“You could do whatever you wanted,” David continued. “You could even write a book—I was serious before about that. The Duke and The Cowgirl won’t write itself.”
She choked out a laugh at the reference to his ridiculous story idea. “What about the other one? The one with the highlander?”
“The Highlander’s Countess. You could write that one, too. In fact, my mom would probably want you to write that story first,” he replied with a snort before turning serious again. “There’s so much you could do. You could start a foundation for abused women and children. You could donate to animal shelters. You could even put some of the money into a college account for Jacob, if you wanted,” he suggested. Then after clearing his throat, he added, “And also for the one on the way.”
It took a few seconds to realize what he’d said, and then she felt her throat tighten up. “What?”
“There’s one on the way, right? You’re with child? You have a bun in the oven?”
“Yes,” she confirmed softly, hearing the happiness in his voice. “How long have you known?”
“A month, give or take,” David answered.
“Why didn’t you say something?”
“I was waiting for you to say something. For all I knew, you didn’t know yet.”
“Did you really think you knew before I knew?”
“It seemed like a possibility, since you weren’t telling me the good news, which I obviously would’ve wanted to hear at the earliest possible date.”
The happiness had been layered with a hint of rebuke, making Paige feel ashamed. “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you when I found out.”
“And when was that?”
“Well, officially … a few days ago, when I went to the doctor. Unofficially, I’ve suspected for about a month.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? Is it because you’re not happy about it?” he asked, even though that didn’t seem possible, given how they’d been vigorously trying to get pregnant for several months.
“No, I’m very happy,” she was quick to assure him. “I was just being hesitant because I’m still in the first trimester—”
“Oh, Paige.” He eased his hand up until it was gently resting on her still-flat stomach. He couldn’t wait until she started showing, since she really hadn’t gotten that far along in the first pregnancy. “I understand what you’re feeling, but we need to stop looking behind us and begin looking forward, with a positive attitude and a positive outlook. Starting now.”
“Okay,” she said after a brief, heavy pause. “You’re right.”
“I am?”
She nodded, because deep down, she knew he was.
“You’re not just saying that so I’ll shut-up, are you?” he pressed.
“No. You’re right.”
Deciding she looked sincere, he said, “Okay,” before changing the subject slightly. “So, what did the doctor have to say?”
“She said my bloodwork was fine, that I’m extremely healthy, and put me on pre-natal vitamins.”
“Did she give you a due date?”
“Approximately July tenth, but she’ll have a more accurate date after the ultrasound, which is scheduled in four weeks.” Paige tilted her head to look at him. “So, how did you know? I haven’t had any morning sickness, yet.”
“Well, I’m pretty familiar with your, uh, cycles, so when you missed one, I started to suspect you might be pregnant. Then when you missed the second one, I assumed you were.” His hands traveled up to cup her breasts. “And … your breasts feel bigger.”
Oddly, it was the term ‘breasts’ that threw her for a moment and she raised an eyebrow. “Did you just say … breasts?”
He smiled. “I figured since you’ve been elevated to the ‘mother of my child’ status, I should be a little more respectful.”
“Oh, well … okay, then. That might take some getting used to.”
They stayed that way for several moments until David broke the silence. “So, I’m not sure how to ask this, but I was wondering …”
“Yes, the baby’s yours.”
“Very funny. But that’s not what I was wondering.” He gently squeezed the breasts he was still holding. “I was actually wondering if you were planning on breast feeding?”
This was something they’d never discussed when she was pregnant the first time. “Yes, I am, God willing. Why?”
After a slight hesitation, he answered, “Ashley didn’t.”
“Really? Why not?”
“She didn’t want to. She heard it, um …”
“What?”
“She heard it ruined your nipples, and she didn’t want them …”
“Ruined?” Paige couldn’t have kept the sarcasm out of her voice if she’d tried.
“Yeah. She was worried she wouldn’t look good afterwards, and that I might not think so, either.”
“Jesus. I’m surprised she wasn’t worried about her vagina being ruined, as well … you know, from all the stretching during childbirth.”
“She was actually worried about that, too.”
Paige was dumbfounded that Ashley’s main concerns with having a baby were how her tits would look if she breastfed and if her vagina would be stretched out during the delivery. “Okay, well I’m pretty sure breastfeeding doesn’t ‘ruin’ your nipples, but since I do plan on breastfeeding, I assume you’ll be able to deal with whatever does happen to them? And my vagina? Because if you’re not, then tough shit.”
David found himself oddly turned on at the fire in her tone, much like the day she’d been stomping naked around his room, firing questions at him and getting pissed at the answers. “I’ll be able to deal.”
“Oh, thank you,” she said with exaggerated relief.
He cleared his throat. “I was also wondering … about the delivery.”
“What about it?”
“Well, are you going to want me there?”
“What do you mean? As opposed to not being there?”
“I mean, in the actual delivery room.”
Her eyebrows drew together as she heard what he wasn’t saying. “Were you not in the delivery room when Jacob was born?”
“No. I wanted to be there, but …”
Paige turned around to face him, her expression a mix of disgust and disbelief. “Oh, my God. Let me guess: Ashley didn’t want you to see her all sweaty and gross while she brought your baby into the world.”
“I didn’t ask, but that could’ve been a possibility.”
“Well, you’re going to be there with me the entire time because I don’t want to go through that experience all by myself. Nope. And you’re going to hold my hand and tell me what a freaking, fucking goddess I am every time I have to push, and how my beauty eclipses every star in the entire galaxy, even when I’m a sweaty, gross mess.” She poked him in the chest. “Are we clear on that?”
“We’re clear.” Suddenly overwhelmed with happiness, he grabbed her face and kissed her. When he finally pulled back, he announced, “Now, I don’t know about you, but I think we should make some calls and share the good news.”
“Right now?”
“Yes, right now,” he said firmly. “Because that’s what you do when you have good news. You share it with family and friends, don’t you?”
“Yes, but what about work?”
“My boss is a pretty good guy. He’ll understand if I’m a few minutes late returning from lunch today.”
So, together, they started making FaceTime calls. The first was to Valerie, who was ecstatic and happy-cried during the entire call. The second was to Jules, who was ecstatic as well, but being Jules, wanted to know all the details, starting with when Paige thought she’d conceived. “Do you think it was on Halloween, when you guys did it while still wearing your costumes?”
“Oh, my God,” David muttered, from where he was sitting, just out of frame. “How did she know about that?”
Paige was about to shrug and pretend she had no clue, when Jules’s eyebrows drew together. “Is that David?”
“Yes, it’s David,” he replied loudly.
“Why?”
“You mean why is he here with me?” Paige asked. “Because it’s his news to share, too.”
Jules leaned closer so that her face filled the screen and whispered, “Get rid of him, so we can have a proper conversation.”
“I heard that,” David said.
Paige turned to him. “Why don’t you give us a few minutes?”
With a roll of his eyes, he obliged. When he was gone, the two women were able to have a ‘proper conversation’, which involved more hypothesizing about possible conception dates and ending up with Ashley’s fears about her nipples and vagina.
The third call was to Evan, who was thrilled at the good news, especially since he was apparently now going to win a bet he’d made with Evelyn.
“You made a bet about when we’d have a baby?” David asked.
“Technically, the bet was about when you’d conceive,” Evan clarified. “I said you’d have Cat Lady knocked up within six months, and Evelyn said it wouldn’t be for a year, because she thinks you have more self-control than you actually do. Damn, I can’t wait to tell her she’s wrong and take fifty bucks from her.”
“Well, congratulations on your win,” Paige said dryly.
“Thanks. So, when do you think the big moment was?”
Paige looked at David. “Why does everyone want to know that?”
“Because they have no boundaries.”
Evan ignored that. “I think it would be funny if it was on Halloween, when you guys were still in your costumes.”
It was her turn to ask, “How did he know about that?”
David was about to shrug and pretend he had no clue, when Evan started laughing. “Actually, what would be even funnier, is if you’d been dressed as Daphne, instead of Fred,” he told David. “You know, like you wanted. That would’ve been kinky.”
When it had come time to pick out their Halloween costumes, Paige had suggested a Scooby-Doo theme, with herself as Daphne, David as Fred, and Jacob as Shaggy. David, of course, had been interested in switching costumes with Paige, but knew Jacob would be confused, so he’d regretfully let the dream go.
“Oh, my God,” Paige sputtered, tamping down her amusement. “You’re sick.”
Later, when they sat down with Jacob to share the news, his response was rather subdued, so much so, that when it was time to put him to bed, Paige told David she wanted to do it alone.
“Are you okay?” she asked Jacob, after he was tucked into bed, with Marshmallow in a ball at his feet. “You’ve been really quiet since finding out about the baby.”
He pressed his lips together, then asked, “When you have the baby, will you love me … less?”
“Oh, Stinker, no.” She climbed onto the bed and settled on his other side so they were facing one another. “I promise there won’t ever be a day when I love you less. Not even on days when you’re being a pain in the rear end and don’t want to eat your broccoli.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure. In fact, I actually love you more every day.”
“You do?”
“Of course.”
“Why?”
Paige should’ve anticipated the question, but was completely taken by surprise, instead. “Well … for a million reasons, that’s why.”
“Like what?”
“You want a specific reason?”
He nodded.
She thought for a moment, then said, “All right, I’ve got one. The other day you gave me the last Hot Tamale, which was a really nice thing to do.”
He made a face. “That’s not a real reason.”
“Sure it is.”
“I want a good reason.”
“Hmm, Stinker wants a good reason,” she murmured to herself. “All right. How about … because you make me laugh?”
“That’s good. Give me another one.”
“You draw me pictures all the time. Now that’s a really good reason. That should count as two.”
He shook his head. “What else?”
“You always help me carry in the groceries, you’re really good at saying ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’, and you let me choose the movie we watched last night.” From there, she decided to throw in a bunch of silly reasons, such as his ability to dance to groovy music, jump in mud puddles, give fist bumps, and nail a Scooby-Doo impersonation, to make him smile. “All of those things make me love you more.”
When she was done, he surprised her by asking, “What about Dad? Will you ever love him less?”
“No,” she assured him. “And I love him more every day, too, just like you.”
With Jacob’s mood lifted, she read to him until he fell asleep, then went to join David in the living room. He was stretched out on the sectional, with Trick-or-Treat on his lap and Sputnik perched on the back of the couch, several feet away; the two male cats had yet to become best friends and were still maintaining a bit of a guarded distance from one another.
“How’s Jacob?” he wanted to know, patting the space beside him with one hand, and grabbing the remote control to cue up an episode of The Sopranos with the other one. Amazingly, it was a series neither one of them had watched before, and they were getting totally caught up in the show.
Paige curled up beside him, under his arm. “He’s okay. We had a nice talk.”
“That’s good. So … Hot Tamales?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “Oh, my God. I can’t believe you were eavesdropping.”
“I wasn’t eavesdropping. Jacob’s door was wide open, and I couldn’t help but hear your conversation, as I stood outside in the hall.”
“You were totally eavesdropping,” she scolded him, with a shake of her head. “Do you remember how aggravated you were when Jules eavesdropped on us? That’s me right now, with you.” She gave him a hard poke in the chest, punctuating the ‘you’ with her finger.
“What I did isn’t even remotely the same thing as what Jules did,” David told her with amused indignation. “And you know it.”
“It’s close enough.”
“So, you’re aggravated with me because … close enough? That’s really mature.”
She lifted a shoulder. “It’s my prerogative. So, yeah.”
He looked down at her for several seconds, then slowly nodded. “All right. That’s fine.”
“That’s fine? You don’t care that I’m aggravated with you?”
It was his turn to shrug. “Like you said, it’s your prerogative,” he said, giving her a quick kiss, before adding innocently, “Besides, why should I care if you’re aggravated with me? It’s not like you’re going to love me any less, right?”
His raised eyebrows and challenging expression as he strategically used her own words against her, backed Paige into a bit of a corner. Not wanting to admit defeat—because it was the fucking truth, honestly—she plucked the remote out of David’s hand and pressed ‘play’, then settled back against him as the funky, opening beats of “Woke Up This Morning”, the theme song from The Sopranos, filled the room.