Chapter twenty-eight
Bexley
Friday rolls around… or Tuesday. Actually, maybe it’s Sunday? No, that can’t be right because I have classes.
It’s official. I’ve lost track of what day it is. At this stage I’m confident I’d also lose my head if it wasn’t permanently attached to my shoulders.
Apparently I took the sleep deprivation challenge a little too far.
I thought I was tired before. Turns out I was very wrong.
At least I guessed correctly that adding a job into the mix would be hard work and exhausting.
But nothing could quite prepare me. It’s the expert level of fatigue. My exhaustion has exhaustion.
I’ve worked morning shifts every day this week.
I’m already a pro at sneaking out of my house without waking whoever has stayed over.
Though, to be fair, it’s not that difficult to sneak out on Tai.
The real challenge is untangling myself from his limbs.
I was also shocked to find out he sleep talks.
He should really thank me—because two nights ago when I was doom scrolling to make myself tired he started muttering something about ‘the dude in the corner of the room’.
I was three seconds away from either strangling him for giving me a heart attack or bolting from the house to leave him to deal with whatever entity was chilling in the corner of my bedroom.
Seriously. Thank your lucky stars, Tai Beckett.
Rylan is an early bird though. After I successfully left him in my bed, he started setting an alarm when he stayed over. We’re a power couple now—I go to work and he goes for a run. It’s disgusting if you ask me, but he seems to enjoy the death cardio so you do you, boo.
Hunter on the other hand has surprised me.
He seems the type to wake up at the tiniest peep.
But I have a feeling he’s emotionally drained.
After having dinner with Peyton, he came around last night, and I swear he’s getting grouchier and more tense with each passing day.
That’s the impression I got this morning anyway when he texted me at work to scold me for not waking him.
Yeah—not on my watch. Get that beauty sleep, boy. One of us should.
Hazel has been kind enough to give me tomorrow off even though weekends are one of their busier days. It will be my first official day off and after the warehouse fights tonight, I’ll probably need it.
Soph invited me over after the fights to spend the night at their house. Loose on the shared domain because I’ve been told Tai does not exist unless she’s reading. Dedicated Girl Time.
Thankfully their semen demon has gone out of state so I reluctantly agreed. The decision was even harder when Tai texted me during American Lit to pass on Mary’s request and asking what I wanted for dinner.
“Do you want to make any changes?” Arch asks, waving the fight list in front of me. “Are you microsleeping?”
“I think so,” I mumble quietly, shaking my head to clear it. “I needed that twenty second nap.” Taking the list from him, I run my eyes over the names. “Looks good. Add me to the lineup too.”
He halts. “Sorry. I think I’m delusional now. What did you say?”
“Very funny,” I shoot back. “I want to fight.”
Arch raises an eyebrow. “In your current state? Bex, come on. Be sensible.”
I try to muster a glare but fail miserably at his concerned expression. “It’s not the same as last time, Arch. Besides, this is my version of self-care. I need to do something after the long week I’ve had.”
“Look I’m all for self-care,” he argues. “But you know fighting involves a certain amount of physical strength. I just don’t want you to accidentally get hurt again.”
“I won’t.”
“You can’t promise that.”
Sighing, I relax in my chair. “I know. But I need this, Arch. I really need this. Ever since Mom died I’ve felt like everyone just sees me as though I’m the poor little orphan. At least I could prove myself here. But that’s changed too.”
Arch frowns. “What are you saying?”
“I don’t know,” I murmur. “Just that I don’t feel like myself right now. My entire life has changed over the past few months and I want to make sure I don’t lose myself. Fighting is who I am. And short of sparring in the hallways here, I don’t know what else to do.”
“Dean Lannister would expel you in an instant.”
“Exactly.” I nod. “Which is why I need to do this. Not just for me but for my reputation. That loss stung. But I can live with failing every once in a while. The hardest part is now that I’m with Hunter, Tai, and Rylan, I don’t want people to see me differently.”
Arch reaches over, grabbing my hand. He rubs my knuckles with his thumb. “Since when do you care what people think?”
I squeeze his hand. “Since I gained something I could lose. Something many people want to take from me.”
The admission is hard but I still force it out. Do I care about people knowing about my relationships? No. But I care about people seeing me as weak and a target, potentially going after the ones I want to protect.
Assholes like Max Astor and Marcus Lannister have made it clear they have no issue hurting their own children to get back at me. Thinking other people might feel different is a mistake I won’t make.
“Okay,” Arch finally says, conceding. “I’ll add you to the list.”
“Do you need ice? I’ll get you ice! Where do we keep the ice?!”
“Tai! I’m fine. Geez. Calm your ball sack.”
My cheeks flush bright pink as Mary graciously glides out of nowhere, alarm written all over her face.
“Is everyone alright?” She asks apprehensively, glancing between the three of us.
Soph rolls her eyes with a huff. “We’re fine, I promise. Tai is overreacting about nothing.”
He stares at her with wild eyes. “Uh, hello. She has a bruise forming on her cheek.” He points at me, waving his finger.
“I’m so sorry about this,” Soph says to me. “I’m going to arrange a DNA test because there’s no way I’m related to this wet sock.”
I look at her with amusement. “I think he’s jealous I’m spending the night with you.”
Tai flails his arms with exasperation. “You were punched in the face.”
“Oh, my!” Mary gasps.
I cringe at Tai, holding my hand up defensively before poor Mary equally freaks out. “During a scheduled, controlled fight. Which I won, by the way.”
I have to give credit to Archie. Despite his hesitation with me fighting, he knew what I needed most. Somehow he managed to have Tamara fight me—a thought which didn’t even cross my mind.
But it was a great idea. She’s a clean, respectful fighter, and it was the perfect opportunity to redeem myself.
It was a close match and I’m almost ashamed to admit how much I enjoyed it. And yes… she landed her fair share of punches. But it’s nothing I haven’t received before so I have no idea why Tai is losing his ever-loving shit over one bruised cheek.
Soph wraps her arm around my shoulder. “Yeah, you fucking did!”
“You’re supposed to be on Willowbrook’s side,” I laugh.
She scoffs. “And not be the greatest bestie in the world? Over my dead body.”
Tai gapes at us incredulously. “Seriously? What am I? Chopped liver?”
“Chopped liver has a purpose,” Soph shoots back. “Go do your boring computer stuff or I’ll use my smudge-proof eyeliner to draw a dick on your forehead.”
He turns to Mary with pleading eyes. “Please tell me you’re on my side.”
She smiles warmly at him, grabbing his arm. “Come help me finish dinner, Bear. Sophia has this under control. You can be my special taste tester.”
Tai’s panic seems to have been fixed by good ol’ comfort food. After dinner, he was back to his relaxed, grinning self and enthusiastically waved me goodbye after we parted ways at the top of the staircase.
It’s definitely suspicious and I’d bet my first paycheck that it’s not the last I see of Tai tonight. He’s trying to lure his sister into a false sense of security, but Soph is much smarter than she’s given credit for.
Which is why she locks her bedroom door behind us.
“Idiot thinks he has us fooled,” she grumbles. “I’ll turn around for five seconds and you’ll be missing.”
“But at least I won’t be very far away?” I offer, comically.
Soph grins. “Will you hold it against me if I smother your boyfriend?”
“Which one?” I tease.
“Touché, sister. But I have no issue with Rylan and Hunter. They can live—for now.”
I bring my hand to my chest, gawking at her with dramatic awe. “Sophia Beckett. I think I’m rubbing off on you. I’m loving this murderous side. Marry me?”
“Of course!” She beams. “But you have to let me choose your dress. I don’t make the rules.”
My nose wrinkles. “No pastels, okay? But hey—speaking of which. Fancy dying my hair?”
I’m granted exile a few hours later, Soph gushing over her artistic creation. I almost want to die at the state of her bathroom, the gray and gold tiles splattered with blue and purple hair coloring.
It was one hell of a process. We had to strip back the pink sections we did for the dance to be able to put the blue through.
After sizzling our nose hairs with the smell of bleach, she layered chunky streaks through my purple hair, blending the two colors together.
I’m definitely more on the dark blue side now, and after Soph sent a picture to Abby, she sent me down the hallway to show Tai.
I’m not entirely convinced it’s for the sole benefit of showcasing her work. I could see her eyeing off the Kindle hungrily. But we’ll just pretend for her sake.
Not bothering to knock, I creep into Tai’s room slowly. My eyes search his computer first, bewildered that it’s turned off.
Scanning the room, he’s nowhere to be seen at first, but then I hear a door open before Tai enters from his adjoining en suite.
Holy mother of freshly baked cookies.
Tai pauses his tracks when he spots me, chest glistening with droplets of water. A towel hangs snugly from his bare waist and for a moment, I forget how to breathe.
“Well, look at you,” he smirks, taking note of my hair. “A vision in blue. My favorite color.”
Of course it is.
“Look at you,” I mumble unintelligently. “All… showered.”
Tai glances down at his barely dressed torso. “If I had known you were going to make an appearance, I’d have waited.”
“No, no,” I quickly interject. “This is acceptable.”
“Bexley,” he says in an almost serious tone. “My eyes are up here.” He motions his index and middle fingers toward his face.
I nod slowly. “Oh, trust me. I’m aware. And no—I don’t care.”
Laughing, Tai strolls over, pulling me flush against his body. My own fires up at our closely pressed torsos and I have to bite back a tiny, happy giggle.
Argh. Who even am I anymore?
“I love it,” he murmurs, bringing his face to my hair. “Really brings out the green in your eyes.”
“Are you actually looking at my eyes?” I ask jokingly.
I feel him smirk against my head. “Nope.”
Dammit. He smells really good. I might have to sneak into his shower later to claim whatever soap he uses. Well, sneak is an overkill. Something tells me he won’t mind at all.
I start scanning the room to try to focus on something before I completely lose control from all the wet muscles and delicious scented body wash. As I reach the bed, I go to skip it, clearly testing temptation, but to my surprise, I actually find a distraction.
“Is that a teddy bear?” I mumble.
Tai pulls back slightly, glancing over at the stuffed toy with me. “Yep. That’s Poppins. I’ve been a little in my feels today.”
“He’s adorable,” I say, a little stunned. “Do you wanna chat about these feels?”
Tai grabs my hand, leading me over to the bed. “Besides Dad being an insufferable bastard, it’s Poppins’ birthday next week.”
I let him pull me over, watching as he picks up the white teddy bear to show me. “His birthday?”
He nods. “He was the last gift I got from my mom. Mary gave it to me when she died.”
“Oh,” I mutter sadly, realization dawning on me. “I had no idea—I’m so sorry.”
Tai smiles, though the light is absent from his eyes. “It’s strange because it feels as though it’s been forever, but at the same time, like it was only recent. I guess…” He trails off, biting his bottom lip.
“My mom dying brought it all up again?” I ask gently.
He turns to look at me, face softening. “I hate that we bonded over that. It’s cruel but if I’m being honest made me feel a little less alone.”
“Same,” I admit quietly. “If I’m being honest, I don’t think I would have gotten through it if it wasn’t for you.”
Tai places Poppins on the bed, pulling me into a hug. “I’m glad you came into my life, Bex. Our life. You’re good for Soph. Though I totally did try to break into her room. Snot goblin locked the damn door.”
I laugh into his chest. “Yeah, she did,” I confirm.
He hmphs in reply. “I would have scaled the side of the house and slipped in her window. I know she keeps it unlocked.”
“That’s a little dramatic.”
“Maybe,” he shrugs, arms still wrapped around me. “But as much as heights scare the shit out of me, I’d climb the Burj Khalifa for you. I get to love you, so why bother to be scared of something as tedious as becoming a human pancake?”
I tighten my hold on him. “I love you too, Tai.”
He laughs quietly, the force gently shaking our bodies. “Hey—you didn’t keep me hanging like Ry.”
Rolling my eyes, I pull back to meet his gaze. “I love you… but if you gloat about it to him I’ll sic Soph on you. Now, tell me more about your mom and Poppins.”