Chapter 14
Gabriel
“I’d never let anything bad happen to you.”
“I know.”
Gabriel replayed Nicholas’s response on a loop. He’d earned his trust, and Nicholas’s tone said he gave it blindly. This was what Gabriel wanted; this was everything he’d hoped for. Then why did it not feel like a victory?
Because it isn’t real.
None of it could be real until Nicholas learned the truth and then chose him anyway.
He’d deluded himself into believing this was the best course of action, that the blow would be softer if Nicholas got to know him first. But honesty from the start would’ve left them with only one direction to go: up.
Now they were in for a crash, one that would obliterate them.
He sat facing the ocean, Zeke and Kai curled up at his feet, while Maxim growled up at him.
“You know, great one, it’s okay to be nice to me, to admit you’ve grown fond of me.”
Gabriel set his ashtray on the low table to help Maxim onto his lap, scratching behind his good ear. “You don’t have to be the strong one anymore. My protection extends to you as well.”
Maxim glowered, even as he sighed in contentment.
“So stubborn.”
Having gotten what he needed, he hopped down to join his brothers, freeing Gabriel to take a healthy sip of his scotch. Intoxication would be impossible without the presence of barseem, but much like smoking, he enjoyed the burn.
The chair Nicholas normally occupied was empty tonight. By now, he would’ve ended up in Gabriel’s lap. Gabriel felt his absence as one would a lost limb. He’d grown accustomed to their late-night conversations under the moon, to the waves lulling Nicholas to sleep in his arms.
He longed for the ritual of carrying him to bed, of skimming his lips across his forehead, and wishing he didn’t have to leave him.
One day, they’d be together in that bed, and it pained him to know it might be out of necessity on Nicholas’s part, and not something he welcomed with an open heart.
Pained him enough to accept the things Nicholas now offered freely, for fear it would never be given willingly again.
He knocked back the rest of his drink, a tiny punishment for all his wrongdoings. He hissed as it went down, but the scorch wasn’t enough. Nothing would appease his guilt.
Gabriel yanked at his tie, casting it aside before roughly rolling up his sleeves. The disturbance woke the boys, sending them scurrying past Nicholas to get inside.
“Nicholas,” he breathed in surprise. “I didn’t hear you come down.” He’d been too consumed with self-pity.
“I called your name. Twice. What were you thinking about?” He stood near the glass wall, his hair in disarray, pillow lines imprinted on his rosy cheeks. He looked utterly appetizing. Biteable.
“You. Always you.”
He blinked, his shy grin lazy, sensual. “Were you thinking about all the things you want to do to me?”
“If you only knew all the things I want to do to you, Nicholas.”
“So what’s stopping you?” His hands tightened on the throw over his shoulders. He wasn’t wearing a shirt underneath.
“My conscience. I only seem to have one where you’re concerned. I can’t ignore the fact that your life has significantly changed since meeting me.”
Because of me.
“There are many things I can’t ignore, no matter how hard I try.”
“None of what’s happened is your fault.”
How I wish that were true.
“We can wait for as long as you want, or as long as I can manage. But if guilt is what’s stopping you, don’t let it.” His doe eyes filled with the vulnerability he no longer hid. Gabriel hummed evasively, beckoning him over.
As much as he wanted to take Nicholas in every way, that part of their relationship wasn’t his priority. It took a lot of restraint on his part because Nicholas’s scent conveyed how much he wanted Gabriel.
“In due time,” he promised, scooting to the edge of his seat.
He tugged on the thin blanket, letting it fall from around Nicholas.
“I’ll keep you warm.” He trailed his fingers over his soft, unblemished skin.
Over each taut nipple and defined pec. Nicholas released a violent shudder.
Gabriel sat back, pulling Nicholas down onto him.
“Did a dream wake you?”
They were a nightly thing. By Gabriel’s account, he should’ve been up to journal entry twelve by now.
“No. I rolled over, and you weren’t there.”
“I’m never there.”
In keeping with the slow progress of their intimacy, they slept in separate rooms.
“What if I want you there from now on?”
“Then I’ll be there.” He couldn’t deny him this.
Nicholas placed a soft kiss on Gabriel’s temple before casting his gaze over the rough waters. “I can’t believe I fell asleep.”
“An adrenaline crash will do that to you.”
Nicholas slept the whole ride home from Ashfall.
“It’s late. Why are you still dressed? Do you even own anything other than suits?”
“Says the man wearing a pair of my sweats.” They were the same pair he’d borrowed the night Gabriel rescued him from O’Brien’s club.
“They were your only pair of sweats.”
They’d been a disgruntled gift from Hamza. A not-so-subtle hint.
“By the way, you’re not getting them back. I’ve washed them twice, and they still smell like you. The T-shirt too.” He tucked himself closer to Gabriel, drawing his knees up.
“I’m either in a suit or nothing at all.”
His kind didn’t have the same hangups about nudity as humans seemed to have. Out of respect for Nicholas, he remained clothed while in his presence.
“Sandy said you have slutty forearms.”
Gabriel let out a low, vibrating laugh. “Who’s the liar now?”
“It’s true.” He traced the exposed skin of Gabriel’s forearm. “She told me that earlier, after asking about you. Says you’re ‘such a tease.’”
Gabriel hummed, his blood buzzing under Nicholas’s exploring touch. “And what do you think?”
“I think that I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I saw more.” His words were softer than a breath.
The moment turned electric, and although Gabriel knew the signs of an oncoming episode—knew the scent of it—he skimmed his hand along Nicholas’s warm flank, teasing just his fingertips past his waistband.
Nicholas moaned, burying his nose in the crook of Gabriel’s neck.
“I’ve washed them twice, and they still smell like you.”
Gabriel had never worn those sweats, but they’d been mixed in with his things, so he supposed it was possible. Still, he was curious. “What do I smell like to you?”
Nicholas pressed his nose in deeper. “Like the earth after it rains. It’s so strong. I smell it all the time now.” He sounded helpless to it.
“When did it start?”
Nicholas’s skin turned feverish.
“Nicholas?” Gabriel pulled back, watching as his eyes glazed over.
“I… I-I need…”
The scent of his arousal slammed into Gabriel with the heft of an iron fist, pinning his spine to the chair. He gritted his teeth through the complex agony, his own need contorting his insides.
“Nicholas, wait.”
He tried to think, but Nicholas’s body plastered against his left no room for thought. Gabriel was suddenly ravenous, his thirst chafing his throat, his hunger for Nicholas’s body striking.
“I need…” He quickly adjusted his position, frotting atop Gabriel, raking his blunt nails along the shorn hairs of his scalp.
The symbols beneath Gabriel’s skin pulsed, the hair along his forearms shimmering gold. He called for Nicholas to slow down again, struggling to will away the mounting proof of his immortality.
“Breathe, my love. Breathe.”
“I-I c-can’t.” Nicholas’s neck snapped back, his body seizing.
Gabriel rose with him in his arms, hurrying into the darkened house. The dogs whimpered but stayed back.
Nicholas’s erection tented the sweats, his body flushed with fever. Gabriel lay him on the couch.
“Nicholas!” He bit into his own tongue, sealing their mouths in a blood-kiss. He tore into himself several more times, the wound healing faster than Nicholas could drink.
“More than a drop, more than a drop, more than a drop…”
He’d been about to rip into his wrist when Nicholas responded, latching onto the kiss.
Gabriel gathered him close, deepening the kiss until the tremors eased and his fever broke.
This wasn’t the transition. Nicholas’s steady heartbeat confirmed it, but Gabriel placed an ear to the rapid rise and fall of his chest to be sure.
“It h-hurts.” Nicholas dug his heels into the cushion, reaching between his legs, crying out when he made contact with his erection.
The blood helped, but it was no longer enough.
Gabriel shoved the coffee table aside, sending it crashing into the fireplace. The pitter-patter of paws sounded as the dogs ran from the room.
Nicholas whimpered as Gabriel moved him to the floor and peeled his sweats off. His cock was hard as granite, leaking steadily from the tip. His scent grew more potent, enveloping Gabriel and challenging his resolve.
“G-Gabriel, p-lease.”
Nicholas tugged at his own hair, sweat rolling over the ridges of his abdomen. Gabriel’s gaze roamed over his sleek physique, chiseled but slender, his curved cock a beautiful complement to the sinful image he made.
He held his breath, trying to regulate his cravings as his dick tested the strength of his inseam.
Gabriel considered giving Nicholas what he needed, burying his cock deep inside his needy hole, soiling it with his seed.
But he’d been arrogant, so sure he held total dominion over his nature.
In the current state he was in, famished and raring to fuck, he would end up breaking Nicholas’s human body. Hunting more often would be crucial.
Nicholas muttered nonsensical words, becoming more agitated the longer his lust went unsatisfied.
Gabriel couldn’t help himself, couldn’t deny the predator inside him that wanted just a little taste, a sample of what he’d one day have.
He slid his palms beneath Nicholas’s buttocks and lifted, sharp talons digging into soft flesh as he spread his cheeks apart.
He closed his eyes, not daring to inhale as he dragged the flat of his tongue through Nicholas’s warm cleft.
“Unngh!” Cum erupted from Nicholas’s cockhead, copious amounts raining down on his chest and abdomen. Gabriel lowered him quickly, claws tapping against the hardwood as he fell over him. Nicholas’s neck strained, cock still jerking untouched.
Gabriel’s eyes flared at the ropes of cum streaking across Nicholas’s body, his tongue itching for a taste. The bones along his torso stretched and receded, popping the ivory buttons of his shirt. A reaction to the monster inside him demanding more.
Nicholas panted, his knees falling to the side as his dick hardened again.
“Please,” he slurred, pupils glazed. “Please.”
Gabriel clawed at the front of his pants, tearing the fabric away with a growl. His cock bobbed, the natural secretion his body produced dripping onto the floor. He wrapped a hand around himself as he closed his mouth over Nicholas’s erection.
“Fuck!” Nicholas shouted, resorting to profanity for the second time that night.
Gabriel moved with purpose and precision, alternating between deep throating and focusing on just the tip. He hollowed his cheeks, dragging his tongue along the underside of Nicholas’s shaft, all while fist-fucking his own dick.
His gums ached with the restraint it took to hold back his fangs, and his ribcage burned where his mated brand used to be.
He hadn’t taken a breath in minutes—and he wouldn’t. Couldn’t risk it being this close to Nicholas’s femoral artery.
“Mmm,” Nicholas moaned, fucking Gabriel’s face with the skill of someone practiced—or someone lost to their baser instincts. He slapped his palms to the floor, nails digging into the planks as he neared his second orgasm.
Gabriel sucked faster, jerked himself off harder as Nicholas mumbled words close to his heart.
“Inta hayati… Inta hayati…”
You are my life… You are my life…
He must have been caught between the past and the present.
Gabriel took him to the base, his tonsils brushing against Nicholas’s slit.
“Gabriel!” he cried out, back arching off the floor as he came.
Gabriel swallowed greedily, Nicholas’s cum soothing his parched throat. He digested every last salty drop before coming with a roar that shook the brass chandelier.
Nicholas lay limp with fatigue, eyes drifting closed as Gabriel pumped cum over his sweaty body. He marked his chest, squirting onto his spent cock, his name a whispered breath on Nicholas’s lips.
Gabriel licked him clean when he was through, lapping up their mingled release.
“Ishrab,” Nicholas commanded, voice a thin rasp. “Ishrab.”
Gabriel froze with his tongue at the apex of Nicholas’s thighs. In his dream-state, Nicholas had bared his neck to him.
Gabriel forgot not to breathe.
His lips pulled back from his teeth with a drawn-out hiss, canines lengthening as his spine rounded.
A distressed bark sounded, breaking through his bloodlust. He caught his reflection in the glass wall; savage, eyes wide and golden, feral with hunger. He scrambled backward, caging his breath again.
Ezekiel and Malachi scampered in, fussing over Nicholas. Maxim halted next to Gabriel, planting his front paws on his thigh.
“I’m okay. Go look after him. Always look after him.” His voice was strained, fear and shame consuming him. “Go.”
Maxim stared at him for a moment longer before joining his brothers, licking at Nicholas’s fingers.
Gabriel looked down at himself. Shirt buttons missing, pants in tatters, cock resting against his bent leg. He slumped against the couch, regaining his composure before carrying Nicholas to bed.
“Your heart is still strong, Habibi,” he whispered, ear pressed to Nicholas’s chest. “We have time. Not much, but we have time.”
Enough time for Gabriel to tell him the truth, to find the courage to get it done. But first, he needed to ensure that what happened tonight never happened again.
Gabriel disappeared into his closet to change, returning to give Nicholas one last glance before vanishing into the night.