Chapter Seven
Leighton
I’m doing my best not to let my emotions show as I watch his incredibly toned back walk out of the kitchen I now call ours, onto the deck.
Once he’s there, I watch as he gets the grill started, and it’s only when I turn away from the window do I let myself feel.
Tears silently stream down my face as I let the impact of the words he spoke wash over me.
I never knew how much it truly mattered to me, his opinion, until he uttered the words it didn’t matter what stock you came from.
This afternoon, here in our kitchen, after almost a year of living together and six months of marriage has been an absolute game changer.
One I never saw coming, but at the same time, one I’m absolutely grateful for.
I try to take a breath, but let out a sob instead, not sure how to handle this onslaught of emotion.
It’s never much mattered to me what others thought, because I couldn’t change the way they perceived my family.
I knew at a very early age I was an extension of what others believed of my family and I was included in those assumptions.
Looking back, I never had a chance, and damned if I haven’t gotten one now because of the man standing on the back deck, making me a hamburger.
I’ll make him proud, no matter what I have to do.
He’s the only person in my almost twenty-four years that’s ever taken any kind of chance on me, and I won’t let him down.
Cleaning the tear tracks off my face, I go about making some macaroni and cheese, along with the steamed vegetables Holden likes to have at every meal.
Letting my gaze travel back out to the deck again, I let it roam over his body.
Truly, he’s a magnificent piece of work, all lines and dark ink, everywhere the eye can see.
He’s cut and lean, muscular and amazingly athletic, yet gentle when he has to be.
I’ve been witness to the hard work he puts in to maintain the six percent body fat I’ve heard the other guys give him shit about.
Therefore, I want to help him as much as I can.
I’ve also been witness to the tender side of him, the one that’ll help a little old lady across the street when we’re having a festival downtown and cars don’t want to stop.
It was panty-melting, not even gonna lie, when he took June Sutter’s small hand in his and walked her straight across Main Street, daring the drivers he held up to defy him by going until she’d made it safely to the other side.
I imagine the way she gazed up at him with awe in her eyes is the same way I gaze up at him.
Holden Thompson is an enigma with lots of twists and turns, secrets and hidden doors.
I want to navigate them all, know them all, and not stop until there’s absolutely nothing between us.
He’s done all he can to help me, and I’ll do anything in my power to help him.
Regardless of whether we wanted to be, we’re a team, and right now it’s kinda us against the world.
“You get to pick the movie tonight,” I remind Holden, glancing over as we load the dishwasher with our dinner dishes.
He laughs, throwing his head back. I love when he does that, his face completely changes and the way his Adam’s apple moves up and down is incredibly sexy.
He tilts his head forward, still chuckling as he looks at me.
“That side-eye you just gave me says you get to pick, but don’t pick anything you really like because I hate everything you love. ”
A small smile spreads across my face as I nod slowly, willing to admit to his criticism. “I do hate everything you love when it comes to movies. Why can’t you like a good comedy or an action movie? Why do we always have to watch the ones that scare me a little bit?”
“First of all, there’s no such thing as a good comedy, not really.
And please, a little bit?” He raises an eyebrow in disbelief, a pure bad boy smile making its way across his face.
It’s that smile I love the most, when he lets go and shows me every bit of his personality.
“The way you jump into my arms sometimes says you’re more than a little scared. ”
My face burns with embarrassment and I roll my eyes in annoyance.
I’m convinced he does this to see my face turn red.
I’ve never been good at movies where people jump out at others, never, not even when I was a kid and I didn’t know all the dangers lurking in the dark. “Total girly reaction, what can I say?”
He leans back against the granite counter, arms folded across his bare chest, the dimples I hardly ever see popping against the darkness of his five o’clock shadow, and the smart ass smile still on his face.
“It’s okay if you’re scared, I’ll protect you,” his voice deep, his tone teasing as he continues.
“We’ll even leave the lamp on if you need to, Leigh. ”
I throw the nearest dishtowel at his head, scowling when he catches it with a quick flick of his wrist. “A scary flick it is.”
Twenty minutes later we’re sitting on the couch, in what’s become our usual nighttime routine when he’s home.
After dinner we watch a movie. Twice we’ve ended up in each other’s arms, without necessarily meaning to.
Tonight though, I want to be there. I want to feel his heart beat, want to feel the warmth of his skin next to mine.
I’m finding more often than not during the day I miss him.
Whether it’s just to have him next to me, or to share a quick word.
He’s become my friend, and he’s becoming the type of family I’ve never had.
If I’m being honest, this movie isn’t one of the scariest we’ve ever watched, and I’m laying my fear on a little thick. Holden laughs softly as he reaches out with his thick arm when I hide my eyes behind my hand, pulling the pillow tighter to my chest.
“C’mon in here.” He pulls me against his side, his arm resting against my shoulders, curling around my neck.
The weight of his muscles is enough to make me melt into the curve of his body.
If I explained our situation to other people, they’d think we were crazy, but I’ve always been comfortable with him.
From the first night I stayed here, we’ve been snugglers and touchers.
So far, it’s never gone further than that, but tonight I’m feeling a comfort from him.
It’s a comfort I haven’t felt in a long time, maybe even never.
Just like that, I’m right where I want to be, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath me and the strong beat of his heart. It could quickly become my favorite place to be, and it scares me more than the movies we normally watch and my family combined.