Chapter 16
COOPER
I break the water’s surface, zeroing in on him with a glare that could cut glass. “Oh, you’re going down!” My voice echoes across the pool. I know I’m not strong enough to physically drag him in, but I don’t need to. I’ll get him back in the way I know best—by toying with him, turning him on, and leaving him hanging.
Because, let's face it, Ryan’s just like every other man in my life. A liar, a hypocrite. He made me feel guilty as hell about Newport, but he never said a word about his wife. How’s that for double standards?
The worst part? Even with all of that, there’s still something about him that gets to me. I hate that I like him. But I do. I have from the start. So maybe that’s why I’m here, in this pool, ready to flirt and see just how far I can push him. Deep down, maybe I want him to break. Maybe I want him to finally admit what he’s been hiding. Or maybe I just want to punish him for making me feel like shit.
It’s messy. I’m messy—but so is this whole thing. I just have to keep my head straight. But with the edible I just took, that’s going to be a hell of a lot harder in about an hour because damn, the temptation is there, right in front of me. And Ryan is one hell of a temptation.
Ryan stands on the side of the pool, arms crossed, grinning. I splash a wave of water at him.
He just laughs, dipping his foot in before kicking some back at me. I retaliate, splashing more water his way, thankful the few people here are off in the hot tub. As he dips his foot in to splash me again, I seize the moment, diving under the water and swimming fast toward him. I pop up by the edge, grabbing his foot.
“Oh, shit!” he laughs, stumbling. “Stop!”
“No way in hell.” I tug harder, knowing he’ll either have to jump in or risk falling on the cement. He curses under his breath, and then, finally, he gives in, diving in with a splash.
When he surfaces, he shoots me a playful glare. “You’re so dead.” He tries to push me under, but I beat him to it, ducking beneath the surface and filling my mouth with water. Gross, I know. But as soon as I come up, I spit it right in his face.
“Ew. I haven’t seen anyone over the age of four do that.”
I laugh. “Clearly, you don’t hang out with fun people.”
Before I know it, he scoops me up and hurls me into the deep end. I resurface, swimming back toward him, fully expecting to be tossed again, but then something shifts. My pulse quickens, a flutter stirring in my stomach. Do I actually want Ryan to throw me again?
I glance at him from across the pool. Why am I so attracted to him? His stupid six-pack hovers above the waterline. Why does he have to be such a dick—and so great at the same time?
He grins at me, eyes glinting with mischief. “You coming back for more?”
Yeah.
I think I am.
* * * * * ? * * * * *
“Do you know what’s really weird?” I ask, leaning against the side of the pool, facing Ryan.
“What?”
“Pubic hair.”
Ryan bursts out laughing. “What?”
“It’s weird, right?”
“What the fuck?” he manages through his laughter, which only makes me laugh harder.
“I’m serious! Don’t you think it’s weird that we just naturally have this big ball of hair down there?”
Ryan cups his forehead, still chuckling. “Oh my God.”
“Who the fuck designed that? Nobody wants that. I mean, sure, it made sense once upon a time, but seriously, can we get a new model?”
Ryan tries to contain his laughter. “You’ve lost it.”
“And why are we laying the carpet so wide? Can I get a hell yeah for a landing strip?”
Ryan looks away, laughing even harder.
“I’m serious…” I can barely get it out, my stomach hurts from laughing. “It’s weird.”
Ryan tries to look at me but can’t. He’s laughing so hard his shoulders are shaking. “I’m crying,” he manages between breaths. “I’m crying.”
I think the edibles have kicked in.
We laugh for what feels like minutes before it finally fades. I lose my balance and grab Ryan’s shoulder to steady myself. His hand grips my waist, and the warmth floods through my body. I space out, falling into what I call ‘the deep hole of thoughts’, envisioning an entire night of sex with Ryan in what’s probably seconds but feels like hours. When I snap out of it, his hand is gone, and he’s leaning back against the side of the pool.
I startle. “How long have we been in here?”
“I don’t know, but it feels like hours.” Ryan looks at me, and he doesn’t look away.
I focus in on him. The heated electricity between us practically sizzles in my ears. My heart beats in my throat, and my head is buzzing. Every sense heightened. What was I thinking, taking an edible with Ryan? Everything’s more intense on these… Sex is incredible on these. And right now, I cannot be thinking about that—but it’s all I can think about. Sex with Ryan.
I lean an arm on the cement, propping my head up as I face Ryan. “You know, you’re almost bearable when you’re not acting like a VP with a stick up his ass.”
He chuckles. “And you’re pretty fun when you’re not being Satan.”
“Ahhh… nice one.” I nudge his shoulder playfully. “Maybe you’re not as bad as I make you out to be,” I say, more seriously this time. But seriously—maybe he’s not.
“You know,” he pauses, a smirk tugging at his lips. God, those lips. “For someone who thinks I’m such an asshole, you sure don’t seem to mind spending all this time with me.”
I lean forward, patting his chest. “Sometimes you just have to settle.” Oh Lord, his chest. These muscles. His warm skin. Shit.
He inches closer. “And here I thought you were actually starting to like me.” And then he moves another inch.
I want to laugh, make a joke, but I can’t. I’m frozen as his eyes lock on me. I force a sarcastic laugh. “In your dreams, Ryan.”
He moves even closer, and my breath catches. No! I am not turned on… I’m mad at Ryan. He’s a liar and a cheater—but is he? Dammit! This is what I wanted—to play with him, make him want me, and then pull back. But I can’t seem to pull back. Everything feels so good right now—so perfect. No matter how much I want to hate him, I want him. I want him so badly—even if he is married. God, NO! That is so wrong. I inch forward anyway, we’re almost touching now. His eyes burn into mine. I want him to touch me, hold me—make everything in my life better.
He chuckles, low and deep, and I fixate on the sound. Damn. I can feel that too. He leans forward, his chest pressing against mine, and whispers in my ear, “You want to know about my dreams? Newport was PG compared to my dreams about you.”
Oh.
My…
He grips my hips, pivoting us until my back is pressed against the wall of the pool. My breathing becomes shallow as his gaze fixes on my mouth. I can’t look away. My stomach flutters in anticipation as I feel the ache between my legs starting to drum, a heavy pulsing that’s desperate for friction. Everything is so confusing.
His thumb starts caressing my hip, and it takes everything in me to not arch into him. Here’s the test. Will he make a move? Will he go too far? I silently plead that he will. It’s selfish and wrong—I know—but it would feel so good right now. And I want him. I really do. He slips his thumb beneath the edge of my swimsuit, hooking it around and giving it a slight tug. I gasp, surprising myself, and without thinking, I wrap my arms around his waist, pulling him closer.
He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Cooper.” He rubs his lips together. “We should probably get out of the pool.”
Wait. What? No.
I let my hands trail slowly up his chest, wrapping them around his neck, hoping to push him just far enough that he won’t say no.
Come on, Ryan. Make your move. Kiss me . I can’t tell if I want him to kiss me so I can call him out or if I just need to feel his lips on mine.
His eyes lock with mine, and I see a storm of lust mixed with something that looks like disappointment. His hand hovers near my hips, indecisive. Before I can stop myself, I press my lips to his. For a moment, he doesn’t pull away, he kisses me back. His hands tighten on my waist. I can feel my body coiling up, begging for release.
He pulls back suddenly, taking my hands in his and gently lowering them into the water, as if breaking the moment is the hardest thing he’s ever done. “You’re engaged, Cooper. Don’t be that person,” he murmurs, his voice strained, his breath hot against my lips.
What? He’s pulling that card on me? Acting like I’m the bad guy? The cheater?
I step closer, our lips almost touching. “Oh yeah? And what about you?”
He scowls, confused. “What do you mean?”
“Your wife, Ryan… or did you forget about her?”
With a disgusted sigh, I dip under the water and push myself toward the stairs.
“Cooper,” he calls after me.
I don’t look back as I climb out of the pool.
“Cooper!” Ryan shouts from the pool. I gather my things, my movements jerky and rushed, as I see him push himself up on the edge, ready to hop out. I spin on my heel, storming off as fast as possible.
“Cooper!”
I walk faster, almost running. I’m dripping wet, and the second I get inside, I stab the elevator button repeatedly. “Come on, come on, come on,” I plead, my voice rising with panic. The elevator to my right dings open just as Ryan reaches for the handle of the glass door.
I hammer the close doors button in the elevator. “Come on, come on,” I mutter loudly, teeth clenched. The doors start to close as Ryan lunges forward. They shut just in time, my eyes locking with his, my glare cold as dry ice, burning to the touch.
I release a breath I didn’t know I was holding. My heart is pounding like a drum in my chest, my hands trembling. I will them to steady as the elevator climbs to the fifteenth floor. I know he’s going to follow me, and I’m realizing I haven’t thought this through. As soon as the doors open, I rush down the hallway, slipping inside my room just as I hear him call my name.
What am I even doing? What am I going to do now—just hole up in my room like a child? Shit. What have I done? Why didn’t I just ask him about his wife? Did I really just create all this drama because I can’t decide if I want a reason to hate Ryan or to fuck him? Maybe I just want to feel something—anything—different from what I have with Brad.
Maybe I want to feel what I felt in Newport.
God, I’m so fucked up.
That’s when the tears come.
And the pounding on the door.
“Cooper! Open the door.”
I squeeze my eyes shut and slide my back down the wall, letting my head hang heavy in my hands, elbows resting on my knees.
“Cooper. Open the goddamn door. Let me explain.”
I don’t say anything. I just silently sob.
I silently hate myself.
What kind of person does this?
The kind that feels trapped.