Riley
By the time I find clothes to wear and get outside it’s snowing.
The wind is flinging the light flurries in all directions and it’s like standing in a snow globe.
Stepping off the porch, I spread my arms wide and spin around, my face tipped up to catch the falling snow on my tongue.
I love the first snowfall of the year. And without Aunt Bethany, I can actually enjoy it the way I want instead of being trapped on the porch, watching, not touching. I was never allowed to do anything that might make me sick. Playing in the snow or rain were banned.
Not anymore.
Grinning like a fool, I bend down and try to scoop up a handful of flakes to make a snowball. Except there isn’t enough on the ground yet. And what is there is melting too quickly to hold on to.
It doesn’t matter. I’ll have more opportunities to play in the snow. Dance in the rain.
“What the hell?”
Felix’s voice has me spinning around. Except I’m not quite upright yet and lose my balance. Falling on my butt with a squeak, I land hard, my pants instantly soaked through.
The horrified look on Felix’s face as he races across the yard toward me has me laughing. “I’m fine.”
My reassurance doesn’t stop him from dropping to his knees beside me. “Are you hurt? Did you twist an ankle?”
Choking back a laugh, I grab his wrists and stop his hands from searching my body for injury. “No, I told you I’m fine.”
His gaze meets mine, the fear in his dark blue orbs sobering me instantly. “Are you sure?”
“Yes.” I slide my hands to his and curl my fingers around his larger ones as best I can. “I’m fine. Didn’t even get the air knocked out of me,” I say with a smile.
Eyes searching mine, his fingers grip mine tighter. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I’m not. Promise.”
“What were you doing?”
“Playing in the snow.”
With a frown, he looks around us. “Not much to play with yet.”
“I know. But I never got to do it before and I really want to.”
Gaze back on mine, the right side of his mouth kicks up. “You want to play in the snow?”
“Yes. I want to throw snowballs and build snowmen and dance and spin as it falls from the sky.”
“Okay.” Standing, he pulls me up with him but doesn’t let go when we’re both upright. “Then you’ll build snowmen, throw snowballs and dance as much as you want. But you’ll have to wait about an hour for there to be enough for the first two.”
“But I can dance in it now?”
“You can.” He nods. “But maybe over there where it’s grass not gravel underneath you in case you fall again.”
Glancing over my shoulder, I see there’s a patch of green lawn at the side of the house. “Oh, I didn’t know you had a yard.”
“It wraps around the back where the woodshed and greenhouse are.”
“You have a greenhouse?” Excitement bubbles inside me. “What do you grow? Vegetables? Fruit? Flowers?”
“All of those. But mainly vegetables.”
“Can I see?”
“Of course.” Letting go of one hand, Felix tugs me with the other. “This way.”
I’m ridiculously excited about seeing plants and I know it, but Aunt Bethany never allowed me to have any. In the yard or the house. Nothing but the existing trees and bushes that I had to care for with nothing to show for my efforts, not one flower, not one vegetable or fruit.
The one time a random tomato plant popped up near the side fence in the backyard, she made me rip it out. I hated doing it. Especially when it already had buds on it that would eventually have become tomatoes.
“I’m not the best gardener, but I do what I can.” Felix leads me around the back of the cabin and there, sitting right out in the middle of the clearing is a glass house. “Mom built it from old windows she found at the dump. Showed me what to plant and when before…”
He hasn’t mentioned a parent yet. And with the way he trailed off and the look on his face, it saddens him to talk about her. “I love it.”
“Yeah?” He looks down at me as we keep walking but I can’t take my eyes off the sight before me.
“It’s perfect. I love that she used things other people threw away. Proves not everything tossed out is trash.” I let him open the door and usher me inside the warm space. “It’s so light in here, even with the clouds and snow falling. Oh! Look at the snow melting on the roof!”
“The plants generate their own heat and I light the wood stove for an hour once a day most days.” He points to the blackened stove in the corner, placed safely away from the plants. “Do you like gardening?”
His question surprises me. “No. Why?”
“Your face is lit up like a Christmas tree. And the grin on your lips is ear to ear.”
“Oh, well, I like the idea of gardening. I was never allowed to though. Cutting back branches and bushes, mowing the lawn, and raking up leaves doesn’t count.”
“Do you want me to show you how to check the vegetables to see if they’re ready and harvest them?”
“Yes! Would you?”
“Sure. We can see what we’ve got and take it inside. I don’t think we’ll be able to get back out here for a few days.”
“I read your note. Is it really going to be that bad?”
“Maybe. Hard to tell this early in the season. Sometimes they hit hard, sometimes they look like they’re going to and we barely get a couple of inches on the ground. Other times, nothing sticks at all and we end up with a lot of dirty slush.”
“So we should grab anything that’s ready or almost ready?”
“Depends on what it is. Some crops continue to ripen after they’re picked, others don’t. And others can stay on the plant until they’re almost overripe.”
“Okay. Tell me what to pick and what to leave.” I wish I had a notebook so I could write down everything Felix tells me, then when I finally have my own place I can plant a vegetable garden. Maybe build my own greenhouse.
For the next fifteen minutes Felix leads me along the rows of plants, showing me what’s ripe and what’s not. We collect all the produce ready for eating in a basket and he puts a small log on the hot coals in the wood stove.
“That should hold them over until we can get back out here,” he says as he stands and brushes his hands off on his butt.
Like the rest of him, his backside is big. Not too big though. And it has a nice shape. I’d be able to grab him with my hands and—
I suck in a breath.
I’m ogling Felix.
I’m checking him out like one of the vegetables we’ve just been looking at.
Heat blooms in my chest. Bursts up and fills my face. Blazes down and swirls in my belly, making me clench my legs together.
I might be a virgin but I know what desire is even if I’ve never experienced it this intensely.
There was a boy in school, every girl liked him. Me too. I remember thinking there was something wrong with me because every time he walked past, I got hot and fidgety and my heart raced. I spent a whole study period in the library looking up what was wrong with me.
Turns out I was turned on.
But that was nothing compared to what I feel around Felix. And maybe it was the shock of everything that happened yesterday that kept me from noticing or maybe I’m becoming more attracted the longer I spend with him.
Except the attraction is tied up with gratitude.
And I have no way of knowing if my appreciation for all he’s done for me since I arrived yesterday is the reason I’m attracted to him. Or if what I’m feeling is genuine attraction.
Either way, I can’t—shouldn’t—do anything about it.
He’s been nice letting me stay, and he offered to help me find a job and possibly somewhere to live. I need to ignore my feelings and think of him as a kind friend.
Except I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t want to kiss your friends.