Chapter 36
The first sense that cut through the cold, dark nothingness was her sense of smell.
She inhaled deeply, so deeply in fact that it felt like this was the first true breath she’d ever taken.
With it, different scents drifted to her, and her brain tried to analyze them.
They were more intense than she’d ever realized.
The scent of rubbing alcohol was overpowering, as if her entire body was bathed in it.
Underneath it, she recognized the scent of clean sheets.
Slowly, her body seemed to be awakening, and her sense of touch returned. She felt as if she were loosely wrapped in luxurious cotton sheets that caressed her naked body. No, not entirely naked. She was wearing something akin to a nightgown.
Then she smelled it. It had a metallic scent, and she was drawn to it. Blood. Her memory came back, assaulting her with images and sensations she would rather forget.
She remembered the bullet that had hit her in the chest. The pain was vivid in her mind, even if she couldn’t feel it anymore. It could only mean one thing: she was in a hospital, and they’d operated on her and pumped her full of morphine to ease the pain so she could heal.
Yet, her mind was clear, even clearer than before, not foggy like it would be if she was on opioids. How could that be? Something wasn’t right.
When the bullet had hit her, she hadn’t expected to survive.
She’d felt the impact in her left upper chest where her heart was located.
Nobody could survive a shot like that. But she could feel and hear her own heart beating stronger and faster than before.
When she concentrated, she could even hear the blood rush through her veins.
It wasn’t the only thing she could hear.
She heard a faucet drip, while at the same time the sound of the clacking of a keyboard drifted to her. Everything seemed so close yet so far away. Was she in a coma?
She had to move. If she could move, it would prove that she wasn’t in a coma, that she was alive.
Concentrating on her hands, she ordered her fingers to move.
They did. Relieved, she took another breath.
As her lungs filled with air and her chest expanded, she forced her eyes open.
Another breath, and she sat up without much effort.
She’d been right. She was in a hospital, though the room was less sterile than she’d expected.
There was even a sofa in one corner. She’d survived the gunshot.
She touched the spot where the bullet had penetrated.
To her surprise, there was no bandage. She looked down at herself and lifted the hospital gown away from the spot.
Beneath it was nothing but smooth, unblemished skin.
No sign that she’d ever been shot, no scar, no blood.
Her heart raced. How could that be? Was she dreaming? What was going on? What had happened?
The sound of a door opening made her snap her head to it. A dark-haired woman in a white doctor’s coat entered. Her name was embroidered above her left breast pocket: Maya Giles, MD.
“You’re finally awake,” she said and approached. “I’m Dr. Giles. But you may call me Maya. How are you feeling, Catalina?”
“Did you operate on me?” Catalina asked automatically.
“Yes, I took the bullet out.”
“Thank you. You saved my life.”
“I didn’t. Benjamin did.”
Catalina gasped. “Benjamin? No, no, that can’t be.” Panic rolled over her. “You can’t let him in here. Promise me. He’s going to hurt me.”
Maya sat down at the edge of the bed and took her hand, squeezing it gently.
“But Benjamin brought you here. He’s been by your bedside almost the entire time you’ve been here.”
She shook her head. “No. He’s not what he seems. Please, you have to help me.”
Tears welled up in her eyes, and she wiped them away with the back of her hand. When her gaze fell onto it, she jerked back. There was blood on her hand, and when she looked up at Maya again, she saw her through a red haze.
“What is happening to me? What’s wrong with me?”
“Catalina, you’re fine. But you’re different now. I’ll get Benjamin. He needs to talk to you.”
“No!”
Catalina pushed Maya away, and to her utter shock, Maya crashed against the wall a good six feet away. For a moment she thought that Maya would be knocked unconscious, but she peeled herself away from the wall as if nothing had happened.
“Are you okay, Mom?”
The question came from the door, which had opened without Catalina noticing. In it stood Vanessa, one of Benjamin’s friends she’d met at his party.
“I’m fine, honey. We need Benjamin,” Maya replied.
“I’m right here,” Benjamin said from behind Vanessa and entered the room.
Catalina stared at him and froze, and he met her gaze. There was nothing malicious in his eyes, though she could sense his apprehension.
“You need to tell her now,” Maya said, and she and her daughter left the room and closed the door behind them.
They were alone.
He remained near the door, in fact, right in front of it as if to make sure she had no way to escape. The only other door in the room probably led to a bathroom, and for the first time since she’d awoken, she realized that there was no window. She was trapped.
Trapped with a vampire.
“I’m so happy to see that you made it,” he started, his voice calm and smooth. “There’s so much I need to tell you about what’s happened to you, but I assume you want me to explain first what you saw when we were at Delilah’s.”
“I know what I saw,” she pressed out, her heart pounding. “You’re a vampire. And so is Ross. And he bit me. He drank my blood.”
Benjamin nodded. “Yes, he did. I’m sorry that you had to experience that. He’s still a kid and hasn’t learned yet how to control his urges. I’m sorry.”
At his words, her eyes went to Benjamin’s neck where his carotid artery pulsed in a rhythm that seemed to call to her. She pushed the thought away.
“How about your urges?” she asked, scoffing.
“You’re right. I’m not always in control of myself either.
Particularly not when I’m around you. I’m drawn to you in a way that is impossible to deny.
Even now…” He shook his head as if shaking off a thought.
“But first, I’m sorry for all the lies I had to tell you, because I was too afraid that you would leave me the moment I told you that I’m a vampire hybrid, half human, half vampire. ”
“Half?” she asked, confused.
“Yes, my mother is human, my father a vampire. I was born into it. I wasn’t turned, neither was Ross. You met my friends at the party. Most of them are vampires. A few are human, like Anita. But she’s married to a vampire hybrid like me.”
Catalina shook her head, not wanting to believe it. “Why would a human marry a vampire?”
“Why does anybody marry anybody? For love.”
She didn’t have an answer to that. How could violent creatures like vampires love anybody?
“We live our lives very similarly to humans. We have families, children, friends. We care for them. We love them. We keep them safe. I’m sorry that I couldn’t keep you safe. When I figured out that Judge Norton was dirty, he’d already kidnapped you. It’s my fault that you got shot.”
She felt him take a shuddering breath. His scent drifted to her. She inhaled it and felt it warm her from the inside.
“I survived. And I assume the Prestons will pay for what they’ve done?”
He nodded. “They’ve been arrested. But more about that later. There’s something more important that you need to know.”
He ran a hand through his black hair, and she noticed that it was trembling.
“When you got shot, I knew I would lose you, and I couldn’t let that happen. I love you more than my own life, and if there’d been any other way, I would have never done this to you, but you were dying. There was no time left.”
“What are you saying?” She felt her voice tremble.
He looked into her eyes and straightened. “When you lay dying in my arms, I gave you my blood to turn you into a vampire. I’m so sorry that I did this without your consent, but there was no time. You were unconscious. You were slipping away.”
She stopped breathing, while her heart beat in a rapid staccato.
Benjamin’s words echoed in her ears, and she tried to comprehend them.
But her mind refused to cooperate. It couldn’t be true.
She couldn’t be a vampire. It wasn’t possible.
That would make her a monster. And she didn’t feel like a monster. She felt alive. She felt vibrant.
“It’s not true. It can’t be.”
“It is,” he said quietly. “Look at your skin. Your wounds have healed. There are no scars. And your senses are sharper. You can hear better; your sense of smell is so much stronger now. And you’re stronger. You flung Maya against the wall. And it felt effortless, didn’t it?”
She knew that everything he said was what she’d been experiencing since she’d awoken. She was different. She felt it. Tears welled up in her eyes once more.
“And your tears are red,” he added.
“But I’m not a monster,” she choked out, a sob escaping from her throat. “I can’t be a monster.”
“You’re not. And neither am I. Nor my friends or my family.”
She watched through her tears as he came closer until he stood only a few inches away from her. His scent was more potent now, and her throat felt parched as if she’d been in a desert and needed water to survive.
“But what am I gonna do now? How can I live like this?”
“I’ll take care of you, and I’ll teach you everything you need to know. I’m here for you,” he murmured.
When she felt his arms wrap around her, she allowed herself to melt into his embrace.
She inhaled his drugging scent. With it, hunger rose inside her.
She felt her gums itch and her jaw distort painfully.
Before she knew what was happening, she felt sharp canines descend from her upper row of teeth.
She’d grown fangs. In that moment, instinct took over, and though she knew nothing about being a vampire, she knew this. She needed blood.
She nuzzled her face in the crook of Benjamin’s neck and licked over his soft skin.
She felt him shiver, but she wouldn’t let him escape now.
She gripped him hard, then sank her fangs into his neck.
When the first drops of his blood reached her tongue, she felt her entire body awaken.
Pleasure spread to every cell of her body, while the blood infused her with strength.
Instinctively, she knew that she was strong enough to kill a man with her bare hands, hands that had turned into claws, claws that were slicing through Benjamin’s shirt as she forced him to submit to her.
So she could take what she needed. So she could survive in this new form—by hurting somebody. By robbing them of their blood.
Disgust surged through her. Guilt wasn’t far behind. When shame collided with them, she removed her fangs from his neck and reared back. She stared at the wound she’d caused and watched how the blood was still seeping from it. Regret slammed into her.
“Oh God, what have I done?”
Tears streamed down her face, blurring her vision.
“Catalina.”
Benjamin’s voice sounded drugged, weak. She’d hurt him. How could she have hurt the man she’d professed to love? How could she have turned so evil? So selfish, so heartless.
“I can’t be this… I can’t…”
When a sob tore from her chest, she whirled around on her heel and raced to the door. She ripped it open and ran outside.
“Catalina, stop,” Benjamin called after her, but she ignored him and barreled toward the double doors that seemed to lead outside of the clinic.
She had no idea where she was, and barefoot in a hospital gown she wouldn’t get far, but she had to get away from him, so she wouldn’t hurt him even more.
Because she’d lost control over herself, the need for blood was too urgent to deny.
And next time, she might take too much of his blood and kill him.
And she could never live with herself if she did that.