Chapter 23
Des Arc, Arkansas
The next morning, Ella had been up early and was out in the field, gathering soil samples with the six men who had been assigned to help her do the actual collections.
Going forward, Ella planned to do most of her work from her office, but she wanted to make sure everyone knew and was following the correct protocols from the get-go.
It had only been two days, but she already loved her job.
It felt so good to have her hands back in the soil and be making a contribution.
Her brain felt like it was coming out of a deep freeze.
Ella had spoken with Blesson for several hours and read over all of his notes.
She was fully up to speed on the scope and the directive of the project.
While she knew she would not have been able to drive such a huge project on her own, she felt more than capable of directing it under Blesson’s instruction.
He was super prepared and had made incredible notes, which luckily, Ella was able to read and process quickly.
As Ella pulled the truck into the gravel parking lot of her office, she saw Ben leaning against the door of his car, his legs casually crossed at the ankle.
After parking, she hopped out and gave him a crooked smile.
Though she was worried about his reception, it was good to see him.
As always, the sight of him soothed something in her.
“Hey. What are you doing here?” Her voice was soft and nervous-sounding.
Giving Ella a look she could not read, Ben smiled. “Funny. I was about to ask you the same thing.”
“Me? I am working. I assume you found my note.”
Nodding, Ben added, “I did. Thank you so much for that heads-up. It was pretty scary walking into an empty apartment at midnight. You’re lucky I found it before calling the police and putting out a missing person’s bulletin on you.”
Despite Ben’s dramatic words, Ella was shocked that he seemed so calm.
“I am sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you, but Mr. Waters offered me an opportunity too good to pass up.
” Ella scoured Ben’s face for any emotion.
He seemed so calm and reasonable. He was even smiling.
Maybe this was going to go down better than she had feared.
Maybe he would be supportive of her doing the study.
That thought died the minute Ben dropped his Mr. Nice Guy voice and started bellowing.
“Well, that is a shame because you are about two seconds from packing up your crap so we can get the hell out of here. I have already wasted almost a whole day’s work chasing you down.
Whatever point you were trying to prove, you have proved it.
I am sorry. You win. I will pay more attention to you.
If that was what this is about, I concede.
You are right. Now get in that office and tell them you quit. ”
Ella stared at Ben, letting his words sink in.
She realized he did not know her at all.
Giving him a fierce look, she snapped back, “I am not going anywhere. For the record, I did not take this job to prove anything. I took it because I was bored out of my mind, and this is a fabulous opportunity to grow my skills as a soil conservationist. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. There is no way I am going to pass it up.”
Ben, who had been still lounging against his car, snapped to his full height and moved to grab Ella’s arm, pulling her toward him.
“Oh, yes, you are going to pass it up. Have you lost your mind? We live in Little Rock. You can’t be on the road two to three hours a day, as well as work the eight to ten hours a day a study like this will require.
Use that huge brain of yours. You are pregnant.
That can’t be good for you or the baby. And what are you going to do after he is born?
Think about it. This is not the right time for you to run off and indulge in one of your crazy hobbies. ”
Jerking out of Ben’s grip, Ella responded, “One of my crazy hobbies? I think you are the one who has lost your mind. This is 2024. Pregnant women work right up until their due dates. The study is set to end in late May. John is not due until mid-June. As far as this job being just a hobby, I resent that. I spent four years working my butt off in college learning as much about soil conservation and sustainability as I could. I would never call your internship working on your dad’s campaign your crazy hobby.
Please don’t demean my career that way. As far as driving back and forth every day, I told you in the note, I have company-provided housing here.
I will be staying there until the project is finished. ”
Looking around the parking lot, Ella saw several men who were close enough to hear their conversation. “Let’s go into my office. I think we have entertained enough people today with our little show.” With that, Ella began walking toward the metal worksite office.
Ben watched Ella walk away. After a few moments, he dropped his head in defeat and followed her.
He knew she was right. He should not have called the job a crazy hobby, but it made no sense to him.
They had plenty of money. Ella did not need to work.
She had plenty to do setting up their condo, taking care of their home, and preparing for their baby.
Why did she feel the need to add to that? He just did not understand.
Upon entering the metal building, Ella introduced Ben to Lynn, her assistant, a woman in her mid-fifties. She handed Ella several messages.
Ben followed Ella into her tiny office. She closed the door behind them, then dropped her purse and the unread messages on her desk. Collapsing into her desk chair, which dwarfed her petite frame, Ella let out a long sigh. Ben dropped into one of the two chairs in front of her desk.
Cradling his head into his hands, Ben did not say anything for several minutes.
Ella was the first to break the silence. “I knew you were not going to like me taking this job. That was why I did not talk to you about it before I took it. But I need this. I know you don’t get it.”
Before Ella could add more, Ben interrupted her abruptly saying, “Darned right, I don’t get it.
And you are right, if you had asked me about it, I would have said no.
This job is way too much for you. I get you have had a hard time adjusting, but things are going to get better.
You just need to give it more time. Why this job?
Why now? If you wanted a job, I am sure I could have found you something to do at campaign headquarters.
Or hell, you could work retail at Dillard’s.
But this? A soil study in Des Arc? This makes no sense. ”
Ella shook her head. She had no idea how to make Ben understand how miserable she had been or how much this project meant to her.
Taking a deep breath, she tried again to help him understand.
“First of all, I have asked about helping with the campaign, and you always put me off. Second, I did not go looking for this job. It found me, and I am so glad it did. I feel more alive than I have in months. Getting to use my knowledge and challenge myself by heading up a soil study at my age is not something I even dreamed was possible. I know you are loving every minute of working with your dad, and I would not take that away from you for anything. But I was literally withering away in that apartment waiting on you to come home. When Mr. Waters called and offered me this job, I had to take it. Please have a little faith in me. I know we can make this work. It is only for three months. The project will be done long before John is born. You are gone all the time anyway. You will hardly know I am gone.”
At that, Ben snapped up his head and gave Ella a sharp look. “Is that what this is about? My being gone so much? If so, I promise to spend more time with you. You know it is just until the campaign is over.”
Shaking her head, Ella said, “No. It is not about that. It is about me wanting something for myself. Why is that so hard for you to understand? This will also give me a huge leg up on grad school in the fall in Michigan.”
Jumping up, Ben began pacing around the tiny office, “First this job, and now grad school in Michigan. I can’t believe you are bringing that back up. I thought we had already decided that was off the table. Why are you changing everything?”
“Well, first of all, no, we have not actually decided anything about grad school. You decided that it was not happening. I have not decided that. In fact, for me, it is very much still happening. When I tried to talk to you about it, you told me how you felt about it, then said you were too busy to discuss it further. In your mind, that was the end of it. But I have no intention of walking away from my life’s dream just because you decided it was inconvenient for you. ”
Ben stood with hands on his hips looking at Ella wide-eyed and stunned.
Anger seemed to roll over him as he all but huffed and puffed as he barked, “Let me get this straight. Not only are you going to continue with this job—even though you know I don’t want you to, knowing that it might harm both you and the baby, you are still planning on leaving me and taking my son to Michigan in the fall.
Have I got it all right? If so, why the hell did you even bother marrying me if you only planned to run off and leave me the first chance you got?
Was I just some sugar daddy for you? A way for you to save face in front of your parents and have enough money to cover your school? ”
Without a word, Ella jumped out of her chair, marched over to Ben, and slapped him hard across the face.
Ben absorbed the blow, then looked at Ella with hurt in his eyes.
With his control stretched to the limit, he grabbed her wrist and said, “You will never do that again. Do you understand me? Whatever else happens between us, we will never hit each other. Understood?”
Ella immediately was overcome with shame.
Never in her life had she hit anyone. How was she able to do that to the person she loved the most?
It was shocking. Looking deeply into Ben’s eyes, she almost cried.
“Oh, Ben, I am so sorry. I should never have done that. I got so mad at what you said. Please forgive me.”
For a moment, they both stood shocked looking at each other.
Then Ben dropped Ella’s wrist and said, “Obviously we have a lot to discuss, but this is not the best place for it. I am sure Lynn has already heard more than is appropriate. Get your purse. I will follow you to where you are living, and we will continue this there.”
Ella nodded and turned to grab her purse when her stomach let out a huge hunger growl. Ben took a deep breath and said, “I bet you haven’t eaten all day. Have you?”
Ella looked at Ben, then said, “I had a muffin around six this morning.” It was almost 4:00 pm.
Shaking his head, Ben said softly, “Text me your address. I will swing through town and pick up some food for us. I will meet you at your house. We will talk after we eat.”
Ella nodded and quickly texted her address.
She considered telling Ben that she really needed to stay and do some more work but quickly decided not to.
That would just add insult to injury. He wanted to talk, and she really needed to eat.
She stuffed her messages and some field reports into her bag and called out to Lynn she would be at home if anyone needed her.
With that, Ella followed Ben out of the office.
She was not quite sure how talking was going to resolve anything, but they had to try.
Their marriage and future depended on finding a way to be together without either one of them having to give up on everything they had always dreamed of.
At that moment, Ella was not sure there was an answer, but they had to at least try to find one. The alternative was unthinkable.