Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
FINLEY
Finley needed to get out of there. She couldn’t stay in this ballroom filled with blood and grief… It wrapped around her neck like a noose waiting to choke the life out of her, and she’d be as dead as the late king on the marble floor.
While the others cried and made the proper arrangements Finley made her escape and slipped out the front door.
They’d barely noticed her coming in with them until she’d spoken up and wouldn’t notice her leaving.
For once, she didn’t want people to pay attention to her.
She could slide into the shadows and vanish from their sight and memory.
But even getting away from the great hall Finley felt too present.
The castle was oddly quiet, and her steps echoed through the corridors.
The starlit lanterns flickered against the walls and shone onto Finley.
They extended her shadow out on the floor like a long dark demon with sharp nails and teeth waiting to consume her.
No matter where Finley went or ran her shadow, her demons, herself, would always be there.
There was no hiding.
She didn’t think about where to go or registered how she arrived. But moments later she stood before Ai’s room.
“What in the deities names?”
Rose bushes filled with thorns and flowers blocked the way in. There was no dirt for them to be planted in, but they still sprouted out of the floor as though they’d been planted there the whole time. Branches crawled up the frame and spread across the door. A green shimmer sparkled through it all.
Finley nodded in understanding. It must have been from Rose to protect Ai from the dangers below. She sniffed back tears and grasped the sword still attached at her hip. The blade sliced through the thorny branches like butter, but they only grew back with vengeance.
“Let me see her you fucking plant!” Finley growled and tried again.
Then again.
And again.
She hacked and yelled and tried to fight through the rose bushes until her hands and wrists bled from the cuts from the tiny thorns.
Finley threw the sword to the ground and gasped.
She pressed her hand to her chest and tried to catch her breath, half expecting the world to grow fuzzy at the edges and the too familiar drowsiness to settle in, but it never came.
For once, the dark oblivion would be welcome, and the reminder that it wasn’t there anymore only made it all worse.
She tugged at the collar of her shirt. Air.
She needed fresh and open air. It was too stifling in here.
It wasn't difficult to find a ledge along the outside castle wall that would be easy to scale.
So scale it she did, and she found a spot on the roof flat enough to lay on.
It was the closest she would get to lying on the deck of The Mystic from here.
Finley pushed herself up and collapsed on its surface.
As the last bright ray of sun died away to make space for Luana's glittering stars, Finley allowed the darkness to take her too, and part of her wondered if maybe her curse would bless her one last time.
Alas, it didn’t, and a twinge of disappointment rang through her as she blinked her eyes open. It didn’t appear as though any time had passed.
"Sleep well?"
Of course Rafe was there. He was this constant shadow and companion who always had to be around. No matter how far away she was he knew how to find her. He was more of a puppy than a wolf. No one would believe her if she told them that — other than Ai, of course. Maybe Rose.
Ai.
Finley squeezed her eyes shut again. “Leave me alone.”
Naturally, Rafe did not leave her alone and instead nudged her leg. “They’re looking for you.”
“I doubt that,” Finley muttered. And if he was telling the truth they shouldn’t be. After a few moments she fluttered her eyes open again and propped herself up. If it had been daylight, they would be able to see half the kingdom from up there. “Did I sleep at all?”
“Maybe an hour. Most everyone is asleep or in their rooms. Eira, I imagine is still awake dealing with everything.”
Everything. The word felt like a heavy anchor dragging her to the bottom of the ocean.
She stared out into the courtyard. This castle and its little world was strange.
From here she should have been able to see into a village or the mountains.
Here it was all stars and light and streaks of blood across the grass.
“Right. That makes sense. They blocked Ai’s room.”
Rafe nodded. “Rose and Myra did it. They knew you’d want her safe.”
“But now I can’t get in.” Her voice broke and she coughed to cover it up.
“I’m sure there’s a way you can visit her. But I doubt they’ll release the spell until we all know it’s safe.”
It made sense, and deep down, Finley was grateful. Though her mind and emotions were in too much of a storm to admit it.
They sat in silence for a few minutes and little by little Finley allowed her shoulders to sag and leaned to the side to rest her head on Rafe’s shoulder. It all was too heavy. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pressed a soft kiss against her hair.
“I didn’t see you anywhere in the battle,” Finley said and pushed him away.
He sighed and nodded. “Not in the grand hall, no. But I was outside with Aytigin fighting there. I knew if I was in the grand hall I would have attacked Rose.”
Right. Finley knew that. Still, she would have rather been fighting at his side.
“Why are you hiding?” He asked.
Hiding? Maybe that’s what she was doing. She wasn’t sure anymore.
“It’s my fault.”
“You didn’t kill King Brennan.”
She shook her head. “But I helped Amelia. I knew what she wanted to do, I knew what was happening with Dusan, and I let it. I could have stopped her back then. And I shouldn’t have returned and let her touch the Shadow Slayers.”
Rafe made small circles along her arm with his fingers and took in a deep breath as though he was thinking about how to respond. Because she was right. She knew she was.
“I think if Amelia has a plan in her mind very little would be able to stop her,” he finally answered.
Finley swallowed a lump in her throat. He didn’t understand, of course he didn’t.
“And what about Ai? That’s my fault too.
I was so focused on what I wanted, I hurt her.
She would be awake, the king would be alive, and none of this would have happened if it weren’t for me.
” She pushed herself away from him and scooted over.
The smart man he was, Rafe didn’t push himself to be closer to her again and instead propped up his legs and rested his elbows on his knees.
“You’ve been responsible for a lot of things in your life, Finley.
So have I. But you can’t hide from it. Only move forward.
Besides, it’s never bothered you before, has it? Why now?”
That was the question, wasn’t it? Every choice she’d made was always a means to an end, and Finley never allowed herself to dwell.
The first time she’d killed someone was a few months after joining The Mystic’s crew.
There’d been an attack on the ship, and usually when there were fights, she and Ai stayed below deck and out of the way.
But someone had burst into their hiding spot and almost killed Ai. Finley got to him first.
It wasn’t easy or thrilling and didn’t make her feel powerful.
Finley wasn’t even sure what she’d expected it to feel like.
Putting the blade into him took effort, and there was an odd squishing sound then blood everywhere.
Her hands shook, and she vomited shortly after.
When the captain questioned Finley about it later, she asked if Finley regretted it.
Shaken, yes. A little disgusted, yes. The man and the blank look in his eyes would haunt her.
But regretful? No. She’d rather kill a thousand men than let her best friend or their ship come to harm.
Finley didn’t say anything and only nodded her head.
But her eyes remained steady as she looked out over the expanse of the field beyond Luana’s castle as people continued to clean and collect their injured and dead.
She could almost see that scene so many years ago play out before her.
Ever since, Finley promised she would do what she had to in order to survive and keep moving forward.
Until now. Which was more disturbing than anything. If it mattered now, that meant it had to matter back then too. Finley couldn’t let herself go there.
“Now it’s personal, and it affects more than just a handful of people,” she decided on. But there was more. She sucked in a deep, shuddering breath. Once it was out in the world there was no going back. No more hiding and avoiding. “And… I think I know how to kill Amelia.”
The air around them stiffened, and Finley swore she saw the space around Rafe grow darker, like a storm was rolling in as Rafe absorbed her words The muscles in his face grew taut. “How long have you known?” He asked, barely above a whisper.
“Always.”
Rafe’s lips squeezed together to form a thin line.
“How do you know? I don’t even know how to kill a sorceress.
Is it something beyond the Cursed Queen’s tale?
” Finley rose to her feet and kept her focus on the people down below.
“Because I’m more of a sorceress than I’ve let people believe.
It’s how you can kill me too. It’s not the only way to kill me, I’m still mostly human.
But haven’t you ever wondered how I’m able to be so quiet and so fast?
The amount of injuries I’ve had over the years would shock even the most seasoned soldier.
Blows that should have killed me have come close, but I’ve never quite reached Stula’s threshold.
It’s a lot harder to kill me than it is most other humans. ”
Rafe didn’t react to Finley’s announcement at first. No loud exclamations or looks of shock. He only observed her and cocked his head to the side. “Can you show me?”