Chapter 22
River
Iwatch them through my window. Torin told me they were coming today and to make sure to stay in my room, especially since I stopped taking my suppressants and blockers.
When they told me who the contractors were last night, I quickly did a search on them.
Surprised wasn’t the word when I found out it was Holden’s pack.
But I can’t deny the slightest bit of excitement that poured through me knowing I’d get to see him.
In the flesh. Not that he knows who I am.
I know who they all are. Digging into their lives was the only thing that made me feel safe talking to Holden.
Talking to him the past few days almost makes it feel like the last two years never existed.
Behind the screen I feel at home. I can be whoever I want to be without the repercussions of something happening that I don’t want.
I did not expect them to be more handsome in person than their pictures. I stand there at the window entranced by them, my breath fogging the glass as my gaze stays locked on them. Each of them unaware of my presence—that I’m watching them.
Roman, the oldest, moves with a quiet strength, each movement fluid as if he’s gliding through air.
Every shift of muscle beneath his shirt draws my eyes to his chest. I can’t help but imagine what it would feel like if he were walking toward me, ready to make me his.
A shiver slides down my spine. My sweet mid of cherry and vanilla perfume fills the air, as I press my legs together.
I don’t know why just looking at them makes me feel this way. It has to be that I’m no longer taking the suppressants. I’ve always thought it would take longer for the effects of them to leave my body, but suddenly I think I’m the one percent where it’s almost instantaneous.
My eyes shift to Holden, my project partner.
He’s leaner than Roman, but no less attractive.
I only got to see his face briefly before he turned, facing Tav.
He stands there still, his attention directed on his self-proclaimed brother as he speaks.
But there’s something about him that tugs at my center, whispering promises of a pull I’ll never be able to resist.
Then there’s Nash, the final brother. He stands there causally, hands in the pocket of his pants as he gazes around with curiosity. Something tells me he’s the mischievous one, always finding his way into some kind of sticky situation. He stands there casually, something magnetic about him.
I catch myself biting my lip, restless with the thought of being nestled amidst the three of them. A soft moan escapes me as I press my lips tighter together, already feeling my slick dampen my panties.
I press my palm flat against the cool windowpane, my heart pounding. They aren’t touching me: they aren’t even looking my way, yet my body is alive—heat pooling low in my belly, every single nerve awake for the first time feels natural.
My breath hitches when Nash turns, and his eyes drift up to me. He doesn’t look away; he stares right back at me. For a heartbeat, I think I’m imagining it. That he just made a lazy sweep of the house and just happened to stop at my window, staring aimlessly but not seeing me.
He says something, but I don’t know what it is. I can see his lips moving before Tav says something that has all their attention snapping to him.
I move quickly, closing the curtain and stepping to the side, pressing my body firmly against the wall. My breathing is ragged, and my heart is racing. Did he see me? Is he going to come up here? I start to panic.
Breathe in. Breathe out. Slow and steady.
“Calm down, River. It was just a glance through a window. Even if they wanted to, they couldn’t get up here. Tav wouldn’t let them.” Not even if a very tiny part of me wished he would.
My stomach drops, heat flooding my cheeks as if I'd been stripped bare in an instant. But the need to peek out the window again is too great. I’m more careful this time, less obvious. I turn, pulling the curtain back just enough to peek out but not to show myself.
I catch Nash glancing back up, searching. But it’s not just him. I catch the others stealing glances as well. The fire in Nash’s eyes tells me that he didn’t just see me, he wants to devour me. Something about that doesn’t feel wrong, and I’m not sure how to process it.
A part of me wants to shrink into the shadows, but my body doesn’t move. “From the smell of vanilla and cherries in the room, someone is excited.” Torin’s joyful voice comes from behind me, causing me to jump and yelp.
“You scared me,” I managed to get out between heaving breaths.
“And what, or shall I say who, are we spying on?” He steps over to the window beside me, being more obvious than I am, pulling back the curtain to stare down at them.
“No one.” I can feel the heat on my face as I try my best to lie to him.
“Want to change that answer? I mean if I wasn’t totally in love with my men, I’d shoot my shot with them.” He lets the curtain drop and turns back to me. “Okay, spill.”
“Spill what?” The tone of my voice rises with nervousness as I head to my little kitchen and pull two cans of Pepsi out of the refrigerator. “There’s nothing to spill.”
I walk over to him, handing him his can, then I sit down on the couch.
“Don’t lie to me. You’ve been on your computer. Not looking for people to help but actually chatting like a normal woman. You’ve been staying up late, and it’s only been a few days. Not to mention, you were very invested when you heard the names of the contractors. So, like I said before. Spill.”
He moves over to the couch, dropping down beside me, angling his body toward me.
“It’s…I don’t even know how to explain.” My body is on overload; my emotions are going haywire.
I knew that would happen. The doctor warned me about everything I’d be experiencing with not having a heat for two years after coming off the suppressants.
What I didn’t expect was for it to happen so soon.
“Start slow. It’s fine. Everything you’re feeling is normal. And I for one love seeing this side of you. The one that I think is ready to take chances. To put herself out there and truly live. It’s all we’ve ever wanted for you.”
I nod, because I know it’s how he feels. How they all feel. Even Storm wishes I were there with him, but for me, at this moment, this is where I consider home. It’s where I feel safe.
“One of them is my partner for my English project. He’s been messaging me, not about the assignment, but to get to know me. We’ve been staying up late just talking about everything. He’s told me about him and his two brothers.”
“And it’s nice. You like him?” Torin raises an eyebrow, as he reaches out and boops my nose.
“It’s weird that I enjoy talking to him.
When I was younger, I never had anyone interested in talking to me.
I was pretty much the outcast daughter of the town drunk.
It didn’t matter that I was an omega. To them, I wasn’t a match any of them would want.
” I let out a sigh, thoughts of being back there invading my mind.
The horrible way I was treated; the names I was called.
“Snap out of it. Those bitches at that school of yours were nothing but jealous haters. River, you are stunning, and if tacos were my thing, I’d be courting you right now, begging the others to make you part of our pack.” He flashes me some puppy dog eyes that have me giggling.
“But you’re solely a hot dog kind of guy.” I smirk.
“You know it. So, tell me more about them. I know I did my check, but tell me what has you smitten?”
“It’s hard to say. I haven't even spoken with the other two, but it’s as if I know them. Holden told me so much about them. But when Nash looked up just now and caught me staring, my body lit up in flames.”
“Our little omega con is smitten,” Torin sing-songs.
“Then there’s that. He doesn’t know I’m an omega. He thinks I’m a beta. What’s he going to think about me knowing that I lied? Or if we were to meet, and he sees the scars, the mark?” My eyes drop to my chest, to where the Arcane bond mark lies hidden beneath my shirt.
“If he doesn’t see the beautiful woman that you are, then he’s stupid.
Those scars make you the amazing person you are.
They tell a story of survival. One many don’t get to tell.
You know that yourself, from the work you help to do.
How you have to tell the families you’ve helped that their loved ones didn’t make it.
” I nod, because I know he’s right; it’s just hard to believe it sometimes.
“And the little lie about being a beta. I’m sure when you explain he’ll understand. ”
“Everyone isn’t you. They’re not Storm, Tav, Callux or Josh. Ya’ll accept me as is. Storm has to because he’s my brother. The five of you have been my lifeline.”
“What about Storm’s pack? Do we rank higher than them?” He gives me a playful wink, and the corners of his lips turn up in a smile, showcasing his dimples.
“They are supportive; I just haven’t had a chance to be with them a lot. Hopefully that changes soon. I really want to get to know them. To be close to them like I am with you guys.” Torin pulls me in for a hug. His warm coffee scent cocooning me in comfort.
“Your pack is out there, River. The one you’re meant to be with.
They’ll cherish you for who you are, and help you spread your wings so you can fly and continue to do the amazing work that you’re doing.
” I pull away from him, wiping the tears from my face.
“And if they don’t, then your big brothers are going to be there to beat their asses and bury them ten feet deep down where no one will ever find them again. ”
“Ahh, my very own psychopathic brothers. Who could ask for anything more?” And really I can’t. The sweet girl of my youth is long gone, replaced with one where a little murder is commonplace and doesn't even make me bat an eye.