Chapter 39 River
River
Iwake with a scream, my eyes flying open. My mind is so jumbled, I don’t know where I am. The air feels thick around me; my hands grip the sheets, searching for something familiar, but the only thing present is the pounding of my heart and the burn of panic clawing at me.
Then I hear it—the echo of footsteps—and my body goes rigid.
My mind throws me back into my heat, with them.
Not just the two, but the Hartman pack as well.
Their scents, their voices and the feel of their hands on my body overpower me.
I’m back in that place I swore I would never be again. All I want to do is die.
The door bursts open, and I scream again, high and raw, as I push my body backward against the headboard. I can’t breathe, my pulse pounding in my body.
“Leave me alone. Just let me die,” I cry out, swinging my arms, trying to protect myself.
Suddenly someone’s at my side. Taking hold of my arms, stopping me from protecting myself. Chocolate. Familiar. But I can’t think of anything but the alphas trying to bond me. To finish what they started.
“Hey, hey—” His voice cuts through my panic, low and firm. Torin. I blink, disoriented, the sound of his voice dragging me out of my nightmare. My reality. “You’re safe. They’re gone. Do you hear me? They will never hurt you again.”
My chest tightens, constricting my breathing. I need air. Panic takes hold of me again.
“Breathe,” Torin tells me, his tone slow and steady. “In… and out. Count for me. One… two…”
I try. My body trembles as I follow the rhythm of his voice. In. Out. Count. Again. Until the fog in my mind begins to clear.
The room comes into focus—the soft light spilling through the window, the blanket twisted around my legs, the sound of my own sobs fading into hiccups. Outside, something thuds—a door, a heavy footstep, I’m not sure—but Torin’s shout was immediate.
“Stop! She’s okay!”
“I’m coming in,” a deep voice growls.
The voice is familiar. But it can’t be.
“Just you,” Torin shouts.
There’s some grumbling before the bedroom door opens, and he steps in.
My brother.
He is here. Storm’s eyes are rimmed in red, the broken expression on his face breaking the last piece of me.
I don’t think—I just move. The blanket falls away as I crawl across the bed, meeting him at the edge, falling into his arms, clinging onto him tightly, the kind of grip that says what words can’t.
He wraps his arms around me, strong and silent, while Torin steps to the side. My breathing begins to slow and the pounding in my chest starts to lessen
We don’t speak, we just hold each other. I press my face against Storm’s shoulder, the fabric of his shirt damp with my tears. His scent—maple syrup and cinnamon—anchor me in the present, piece by fragile piece.
I’m safe.
The words feel foreign to me, like they’re for someone else to say. Safe. I try to believe it, but my body hasn’t processed it yet. It still trembles, bracing itself for hands that aren’t coming, for voices that are no longer here or exist.
Torin’s words echoed softly—They’ll never hurt you again.
I want to believe him.
I almost did.
Until I couldn’t. Until never being hurt again turned out to be a lie.
But beneath the relief of being safe is a different ache—something deeper, older.
The memory of surviving. Of everything I’ve had to become just to be here.
Every time I think I’m finally free of whatever curse that’s been placed on me, something else happens to remind me happiness isn’t in my future.
Storm rubs slow circles on my back, grounding me.
I gaze to the left and see Torin. My best friend. He looks so broken. He saved me. I draw in a shaky breath and whisper, “Thank you for saving me.”
Torin sobs. “I wish I could’ve stopped it before it happened.”
“Let’s get you back in bed so we can talk,” Storm whispers, letting go of me so I can get back in bed.
I hold out my hand to Torin, and he hesitates but takes it, and I pull him into bed beside me. It’s then I get the first look at his head. The wound. “You’re hurt.” I reach out, gently running the tips of my fingers along the scar.
“I don’t care. It’s my penance for being caught off guard.”
He thinks this is his fault. But if I had told them about the messages, then maybe this would’ve never happened.
“This is my fault.” I whisper, suddenly very aware of all the aches in my body.
“How?” Both Storm and Torin ask in unison. Storm sits down on the edge of my bed, taking my hand in his.
“Don’t say that,” Storm adds on.
“No. It is. Torin, you know that case I’m working on about the omega abducted from my college.”
“Yeah.”
“It was them. Marcus and John. He told me before…” I clear my throat, closing my eyes as I take a deep breath. “He took her and killed her. He thought she was me. He said he saw me and Storm together and then he realized who I was.”
Storm groans, remembering the one time I went there to see him. It was after they found their omega. We thought we were careful with the precautions we took, but apparently we weren’t.
“I was getting messages about how it wasn't going to be long. They were watching me. Stuff like that. It was coming from the same number that messaged her.” “Why didn’t you tell us, River?” Torin asks softly.
“I just wanted to get this heat over with. I figured if I told you, then you’d cancel it and I’d have to go through the process again. I just wanted it over with.” I lower my eyes, gazing down at my lap.
The room is quiet as they process my confession. This whole thing is my fault. My poor judgement in not letting my family know about the danger that was lurking out there.
“Did they…umm…bond me?” I need to know if I bear another Arcane bond mark.
“No, they didn’t get to. But we do need to do another pregnancy test when it’s time,” Torin tells me.
I nod in understanding. All I can pray for is that I’m not pregnant.
“Did they both?” Storm asks, choking on his words, and I shake my head. Thank goodness for small miracles.
“I’m so sorry I failed you, River.” Torin's voice is low and full of pain.
“You didn’t. You saved me. And I’ll never be able to thank you. When I need you, you’re always there. I love you, Torin.”
He hugs me tightly, crying into my shoulder before regaining his composure.
“So we have something we need to tell you,” Storm interjects, nervously biting on his lip.
“What?” I can’t take it if they tell me there’s another member to the fucking Hartman Pack.
“There was a guy at your school who was trying to become part of the pack with…”
“Marcus and John.” Their names roll off my tongue with a bitter taste.
“Yes. When he found out why he was after you, he refused to participate, and they beat him up. But he was able to get the information to another pack, and they came here to help you. When they saw you.” Storm stops, pausing.
“They were disgusted about how I looked.” I bite back, thankful they came to help, but hurt about it at the same time.
“No, the opposite actually. Turns out they’re your Kismet bonds,” Torin says, a soft smile on his face. “They’ve been waiting to see you.”
“That can’t be. I already bear an Arcane bond. No one would want me. Much less a Kismet. How do we even know it’s true?”
“We’ve been waiting for you to wake up to confirm it,” Torin tells me.
“Once they know everything about me, they’ll run.” I want to cry, but I refuse to. It’s best if they just go and find an omega who isn’t broken like me.
“They do know everything. I told them. If they couldn’t handle it, I wanted them to leave before you woke up, and then we’d never tell you.”
“What!” I shriek. “How could you?”
“Because I love you. I didn’t want them to hurt you when they saw you. When you told them about yourself. When they saw the marks. But they don’t care. They just want to see you.” Storm takes my hand, squeezing it gently and reassuringly.
“Give them a chance, River. They’re not bad guys. And well, you kinda already know them.”
I raise my eyebrow in confusion. How could I know them?
“Who are they?” I gulp.
“Do the names Roman, Nash and Holden ring a bell?”
My heart drops into my stomach.