14. Havoc
Havoc
I don't know how long I kiss her.
Long enough to forget about the burns screaming across my back.
Long enough to forget I haven't slept worth a damn in days.
Long enough that the parking lot, the bar, the wildfire, and every fucked-up thing I've ever believed about myself disappear until there's nothing left but Gabriella.
Gabby.
Honey Girl.
Her hands are buried in my hair, her soft body pressed between mine and the truck, and every time I think I should ease up, she kisses me harder.
Fuck.
She wants this. She wants me.
That realization hits someplace dangerously close to my heart.
Monster is losing his fucking mind.
Mine.
Not now.
Mate.
I know.
Fuck.
I fucking know. There’s no denying it anymore.
I drag my mouth away from hers before I do something neither one of us is ready for. Gabby makes this soft, frustrated sound and follows me, chasing my lips.
That nearly destroys what little control I have left.
“Wait.”
“What?” she breathes.
Her amber eyes are hazy. Her lips are swollen from my kisses, her dark hair mussed where I've had my hands in it.
She's so fucking beautiful I actually ache looking at her.
And vulnerable.
That matters more.
I cup her face.
“I need to ask you something while I'm still capable of forming words.”
That gets the tiniest smile.
“You were barely capable before.”
I growl. She grins.
Fuck, I like her.
Not just want her.
Not just whatever supernatural bullshit Monster has been trying to tell me.
I fucking like Gabriella Santos.
Her smart mouth. Her attitude. The way she loves her kid. The way she busts her ass and refuses to let anybody see when she's struggling.
Even the secrets drive me fucking crazy because I want her to trust me enough to tell them to me.
Someday.
Not tonight. Tonight, I want something else.
“Spend the night with me.”
Her smile disappears. My pulse kicks harder. For the first time since I found her inside Dick's, actual nerves crawl through me.
Me.
Nervous.
Over a female.
What the fuck has happened to my life?
“I know Matteo's with his sitter,” I continue. “And I'm not assuming shit because of that. If you want me to take you home and leave, I will.”
Monster snarls.
I ignore him.
“If you want me to follow you home and kiss you for another hour before I leave, I'll do that too.”
Her lips twitch. She licks them, and fuck me, but I want to chase the action.
Want to be the one who licks them.
“And if I don't want you to leave?”
My cock goes hard enough to fucking hurt.
I stare at her.
“Gabby.”
She reaches up and runs her fingertips along my jaw.
The touch is soft. Tentative. Nothing like the desperate way we were just kissing.
Somehow, this is worse.
This feels like more.
Intimate. Purposeful. Sacred.
“I don't want you to leave. And I don’t want you to drop me off at home.”
My eyes close for half a second.
Thank fuck.
When I open them, she's still there. Still touching me.
“Then come home with me.”
She hesitates.
Fuck.
My heart drops. Then she shakes her head.
“My place.”
Holy fucking shit.
“Come to my place, Rowan,” she repeats.
Fuck me.
My pulse is working triple time.
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
“Gabby, I need you to be really fucking sure.”
Her expression softens.
Then she rises onto her toes and kisses me.
Just once.
And it’s slow. Deep. Deliberate.
Her tongue licks into my mouth and I swear to Christ my dick weeps with need for her.
Only her.
When she pulls back, her lips brush mine as she whispers, “I'm sure, Rowan. I want you to come home with me.”
Every instinct inside me roars.
Take.
No.
Mate.
Not like that.
Not tonight.
She doesn't know what I am to her yet.
Hell, I don't completely understand it.
Whatever is happening between us feels bigger than attraction, but that doesn't give me the right to make choices for her.
I won't claim her tonight. I won't bite her. I won't force a bond she doesn't understand.
But fuck, I need her.
Need to touch her.
Feel her.
Need to get as close as she'll let me.
“Okay.”
She smiles.
And that single fucking smile nearly puts me on my knees.