6. Journee
“Can I stop by again?”
I have been in a chokehold for hours over those five words, and it’s pathetic.
I can’t explain my reaction or the slow nod of agreement that I gave Sincere.
I wanted to blame it on Milan, but the truth is my hormones got lost in the masculine scent of his cologne.
Not to mention the way my eyes shamelessly raked over him.
The suit that hugged his body seemed tailor-made to fit him.
I tried my best to pretend like I wasn’t affected or attracted to Sincere.
But every time Milan giggled at something he did or said, I creamed my panties just a little more.
I only stayed in the boutique twenty minutes, and I could wring out my underwear like a dishrag seconds after he left.
I was seconds from asking him if he would lick my outer lips to hold me over, until I got home to let my rose finish what he started.
The knowledge of Sincere’s return to my boutique fills me with low anxiety.
I haven’t entertained a man seriously since BN, and even longer since I’ve let one between my thighs.
What my rose can’t do, my rabbit and fingers can.
But Sincere’s sexy tail might have me rethinking a lot of things.
The first is what I’m going to do when I see him again.
From the determination in his eyes, I know that it’s only a matter of when he’ll return to my boutique.
Crazy enough, I’m not as freaked out as I was initially.
In fact, I’m looking forward to laying eyes on him again.
I look at the wall clock and realize it’s time for me to relieve Deanna for the day.
Since Milan had a doctor’s appointment, I decided to just keep her with me instead of taking her to Mom.
My mini me isn’t the friendliest after she gets shots, and I like to give her special treatment.
She’s been quiet today and is currently focused on whatever doodles she’s making on the paper I gave her to occupy her.
“You ready to wrap up this day, baby?”
Milan’s head pops up, and her eyes twinkle as merriment fills them.
I match her expression and walk around my desk before I stop and extend my hand for her to take.
There are about two hours left before the boutique will close for the night.
Then Milan and I will go home so I can tackle dinner, bath time, and maybe a glass of wine as I unwind.
My mind swirls with thoughts of what to make for us to eat.
The problem is usually what sounds good and won’t take forever to prepare.
Fifteen minutes later, Milan is in the toddler chair I keep here for her as I fold scarves next to her.
Milan is oblivious to everything but her iPad and the movie she’s watching.
I try to limit her overall screen time, but I need the aid so I can move into my closing procedures.
Two old ladies just left after fingering every scarf I have, then left the store complaining.
So now this is a task I have to complete outside my normal routine, close to closing time.
The doorbell chime sounds, shifting my focus from the task as I open my mouth to greet the incoming customer, only for the words to lodge in my throat.
My body stiffens as my eyes connect with a set of dark brown ones I haven’t seen in years.
BN. A cold chill slides down my spine as he walks to the counter with a grin that I don’t reciprocate.
What the hell is he doing here, and how did he know where to find me?
“Hi, Journee.”
A grimace slides into place as my nose curls in disgust as BN walks closer to the counter. Whoever told him where my business is needs their tail kicked. I have gone four years living my life without this imbecile, and here he comes.
“You’re just as beautiful as you’ve always been.”
My nose twists, and a deep frown slides into place at the words that leave his mouth. It’s been four years, and of all the things he could have said, I’m unsure what made him speak these.
“Humph. Interesting choice of words, don’t you think? What are you doing here?”
For too many seconds, BN and I just stare at each other, and the entire exchange makes me want to act like I’m a heavyweight champion desperate to defend my title.
The love I had for this buster left my body the day I read his letter dismissing my unborn child and me.
As far as I’m concerned, there is nothing for us to talk about, so I don’t know why he felt this drop-in was necessary.
“I fucked up, Journee.”
This motha—Jesus, please be a fence right now.
“Which time? The day I learned you’re a cheater, or the day I lost respect because you gave up your parental rights?”
“That ain’t legal, and I was going through something. I never cheated on you before then, so it doesn’t count. I want you back, though.”
A low, humorless chuckle escapes my mouth as ice freezes my blood, and I hope the daggers in my eyes cut this worthless ninja.
“For real, Journee. I got caught up, and I didn’t know that I—”
“Liked more than my pussy?”
“Bad wud, Mommy,” I hear, and my eyes flutter closed momentarily as I wish Milan had continued her silence.
“Is that? Whoa—Damn, she’s beautiful.” BN gushes as he leans over the counter with his intrigued eyes on the product of our relationship.
I shove him hard in an attempt to cut off his view and my irritation with his awe of my daughter. BN doesn’t deserve to breathe Milan’s air let alone have a conversation with her.
“She’s mine. We’re dead to you, remember?”
BN smirks as he waves me off with stars in his eyes that I wish I had the ability to poke out with a candlestick.
It pisses me off that he has the nerve to gush about my baby after his jailhouse declaration.
I don’t know what made him think he could come here, but I’m about to help him find his brain.
“She’s ours. A letter doesn’t make that shit real, and I’m not giving up my rights. What’s her name? You need to stop this shit because I’m here now.”
I bite my bottom lip until it feels like my teeth are gonna go through the other side as I mentally count to ten.
While I didn’t know the ramifications of BN’s freedom for Milan and me, this isn’t what I expected.
I also didn’t expect him to show up at my boutique like this.
I moved out of the place we once shared together and just knew it would have me in the clear.
I’m not sure what karma I’m getting, but clearly I need to ask God for forgiveness because this can’t be my life.
“You have a lot of nerve coming here and pretending like everything you’ve said is water under the bridge.”
My blood boils as I stare at the man I once had feelings for. The person responsible for the tiny human who makes my life matter. BN’s pop-up makes my ass itch because it causes old wounds to scab open.
“Doesn’t matter. Nobody, including your stubbornness, is getting in the way of me and this.” BN points from him to the area where Milan is.
Milan is standing beside me with her little hands tightly wrapped around my leg. She hasn’t said a word since the three that led BN to take note of her presence. It’s interesting because she’s acting shy with BN, with whom she has blood ties, but she’s been receptive to Sincere.
Hm. That’s because Sincere is fine and looks like a snack.
Girl. This is Milan’s reaction, not yours.
I shake off the thoughts in my mind as I return to my desire to move this man along and out of my comfort zone.
“Well, this was—yeah. I need to close, so you need to be on your way.”
“Dismissing me won’t make me go away since I now know about her.”
My lip curls and my eyes pinch together as my hand rests on my waist.
“I don’t give a fuck what you know. You have no claims to her or me. Why don’t you crawl back in the hole you weaseled your way out of?”
“Hm. That’s cute. Here’s my number. Either you call me so we can discuss this further, or I’ll be back.” BN places a folded piece of paper on the counter and then turns to make his exit.
With Milan still hugging my leg, I move to the front door and lock it before I stand still as my heart beats like an African drum.
I don’t know why BN thinks he deserves a conversation or space in my life to discuss this further.
But tonight, I’m gonna pray that he’ll fall under the rock he crawled out of so Milan and I can continue to live our lives in peace.
My stomach tightens as I lean down to disconnect Milan and pick her up as my stomach sours.
Something tells me I haven’t seen the last of BN, and it makes my limbs shaky as I move toward my office for a moment of reprieve.
My mind spins as I internally try to settle my nerves.
My mind has been in overdrive since BN left, and thankfully, nobody has come into the store.
I’m not sure that I have the mental capacity to deal with anyone right now.
Milan must sense my frayed mind because she’s returned to her seat and back to happily watching her device.
I’m so wrapped up in my thoughts that I almost miss the doorbell chimes until I hear heavy footsteps on the floor that force me to look up.
I should be excited to see Sincere, but after dealing with BN, all I can do is stare at his approach.
Sincere’s brows hike in question, but I’m too shaken to force a smile or calm demeanor.
“I wasn’t going to stop by, but something sent me by here anyway. Based on the look on your face, it looks like I’m right on time. What’s bothering you? Is Sweet Face okay?”
I sigh heavily as I debate whether to share what happened with BN. Sincere and I are somewhat strangers, but something in his eyes calms me and makes me believe I can talk to him.
“It’s not Milan. She’s actually sitting behind me, watching one of her programs. Don’t come too close or she’ll interrupt your desire to know what’s going on.”
Sincere smiles, giving me a devastating mood-shifting expression as he stops a couple of inches away from the counter. His knowing that Milan is affected by his presence is acknowledged in his actions. It would be cute if I weren’t battling with other thoughts.
“Okay. So tell me what’s got your pretty face balled up and your eyes tight with fury.”
“My ex is back.”
Sincere’s face balls, and the area around his eyes become tight with those four words.
It forces me to provide him with high level background on my situation.
The more I share with him, the more his countenance shifts in displeasure.
A small part of me takes pride in his reaction, but I’m also a little preoccupied with appreciating the reaction.
I don’t know what BN is gonna do now that he knows about Milan.