14. Journee
On The Other Side of Town . . .
I got up with a pep in my step and a smile on my lips.
Yesterday was the best date I’ve ever had.
Karaoke was intimidating at first, but getting to perform a duet with Sincere was life-changing.
I felt like we’d been singing together for years.
Staring into his eyes that shone with merriment and delight was everything.
But because the devil is a hater, my good mood grew shaky when I got two back-to-back social media calls from BN.
As if my ignoring him wasn’t evident, he sent three nasty messages.
I refuse to let him knock me off my high horse, so I’m taking Milan to the park.
The invitation to Sincere to join us was thoughtless, simply because I craved seeing him again.
I’m also curious to see if the interaction between Milan and Sincere has been a fluke or a genuine connection.
Milan has been around men related to her for her entire life, but the way she took to Sincere would lead people to believe that I’m one of those women with multiple ‘uncles’ around their child.
That has never been something I’ve done, nor would I, especially given the bum who helped create her.
“Twing, Mommy.” Milan snaps me out of my brief thoughts as I pull into a parking spot.
We’re at Willow Pines Metro Park, and it’s booming with people, which almost makes me want to change my mind.
But I don’t feel like dealing with three-year-old tantrums before I’ve allowed Milan a chance to play off some of her energy.
Besides that, it’s a beautiful day, and it seems unfair to both of us for me to go home bored.
“Wait for Mommy,” I say when I look and see Milan trying to unbuckle her safety belt.
I exit the vehicle and rush to the back so I can get this girl out before her impatience gets her in trouble.
“Pway, Mommy. Pway.” Milan points to the playground as I take her by the hand and lead her to the swings.
It takes me a second to lift Milan into the swing as I push it to get it going.
Joy instantly transforms Milan’s face as she giggles like this is the best thing.
The sounds of children enjoying playtime fill the air, helping me release the tension BN caused earlier.
I don’t know why it’s all of a sudden so important for him to see Milan.
But I wish he would keep the mentality he had before she was born.
“Cere! Hi.” Milan waves animatedly, and I dang near get whiplash from how hard and fast I turn to look behind me.
The inner love thirsty woman in me jumps up and down when I see Sincere’s smooth swag in our direction.
Jitters, elation, and hormones take turns fighting for the spotlight as I stare at Sincere like a starved kitten.
The jersey shorts, T-shirt, and tennis shoes give him a relaxed look that I automatically appreciate.
I fight the urge to focus on Sincere’s face rather than the lower part of his body.
But it’s hard because I’m extremely curious to know if I’ll find a visible print with every step he takes toward me.
“Hey. How’s your day been?” Sincere’s voice pours over me like warm syrup as tingles slide down my spine.
“Cere! Cere!” Milan refuses to let me have the spotlight as she beacons for Sincere’s attention.
When his face brightens, and a devastatingly jaw-dropping smile upturns his lips, my pussy thumps in reaction. Seeing a man who isn’t biologically related to my baby light up at the sight of her fills me with raw emotion.
“Hey, Sweet Face. Are you enjoying your swing time?”
“Hug you, Cere,” Milan says, extending her arms out toward him.
Good God. I see now I’m about to compete for this man’s affections against my daughter.
I watch Sincere easily lift Milan from the swing, then hug her to his chest. Milan’s arms wrap around his neck as her eyes close and her face shows contentment.
It makes me envision what my reaction will be to being in his arms in this way.
Either delusion, fantasy, a thirst to no longer be single, or desire has me wondering how Sincere would be with our child.
It’s crazy because we haven’t had sex yet and have only kissed.
Thinking about kids with this man is diabolical.
“Pway wit me, Cere.” I snap out of my thoughts with those four words to see Milan now dragging Sincere toward the slide.
All I can do is follow behind them as I watch their interaction.
My mouth drops when Milan drags him up the steps, and the next thing I see is them sliding down as Milan laughs hysterically.
Sincere’s smile causes mine as I watch them go back toward the steps to do it all over again.
While I invited Sincere to come hang out with Milan and me, I didn’t realize that she would steal the spotlight.
I’m not mad at my baby, but can I be jealous?
As her giggles fill the air, and I’m stuck in the place, I think I might be.
It’s completely crazy, but I’m not sure if I can help it.
As they come down the slide, I realize I need this memory, so I retrieve my phone and take a quick picture.
I might even need to take one of Sincere by himself because damn, he is fine, dressed down and all.
I’m not sure that I’ve seen a man look more sexy in a simple pair of basketball shorts in my life.
But damn, Sincere got me out here drooling amid all these kids. It’s shameful.
“Mommy, look. Look.” Milan’s cheery voice forces me to remove the sexual thoughts about Sincere from my mind.
Hopefully, I can entice Sincere to come over for dinner and then stay past Milan’s bedtime.
After our date last night, it took the strength of ten people not to invite him in and beg him to have his way with me.
Closing the door on him wasn’t what I wanted to do, but it was something I needed to do.
I didn’t want him to look at me funny for having sex with him on the first date.
If I’ve learned nothing else about my experience with BN, I’ve learned to do things differently than in my relationship with him.
Hell, BN had me spreading my legs in the back of his Camaro before the date ended.
But with Sincere, I want to be different and learn from the mistakes I’m still paying for.
Maybe that’s why I haven’t given too many men any of my focus or attention since having Milan.
I don’t need any more headaches, but I want authentic connections.
Sincere is already proving that a man of his caliber might be where I need to set my sights.
“Earth to Journee.” I blink a few times as I stare into the smiling face of Sincere, who is now holding Milan on his hip a couple of inches in front of me.
See, this man has me all out of sorts, even though I'm in this public park with my daughter. Hell, they’ve only been around each other twice, so I shouldn’t be comfortable enough to daze off with him interacting with her.
“Sorry. Did you say something?”
“Yeah, Sweet Face wants you to go down the slide with her.”
I smile as Sincere passes Milan off to me, and my heart pounds wildly in my chest. Wordlessly, I walk with Milan toward the slide and climb the steps as Milan’s feet tap against my ribs.
We’ve done this action several times, yet something about this moment knowing that Sincere is standing guard has my nerves jittery.
I take a second to sit down without dropping Milan and then turn her so she’s facing forward.
My gaze shifts to Sincere, who has his phone up and pointed toward Milan and me.
Butterflies swarm in my stomach at seeing Sincere’s penetrative gaze.
“Alright, are you ready, baby?” I lean closer to Milan’s ear to ask.
“Ready.” Milan puts her hands up as I push off the slide.
This isn’t our first rodeo, but my heart still drops into my feet as we go down.
Milan’s giggles fill the air as I join in with her humor.
Sincere pockets his phone and assists Milan and me off the warm metal that sticks to the back of my legs.
Electric jolts race up my arm from Sincere’s touch as we move out of the way so none of us gets hit by the eager kid screaming behind us.
Milan, Sincere, and I get lost in playing as time gets away from us, until Milan lets me know we’ve been here too long.
One thing about toddlers is that they’re good when they’re good.
But the minute fatigue creeps into their bones, here comes the whines, pouts, and bratty behavior.
Which is what leads me to invite Sincere back to my apartment for a movie and a chill.
Milan blinks several times as I read the bedtime story she’s picked off the bookshelf in her room.
The nightlight provides an ambiance conducive to her falling asleep.
Thankfully, Milan’s fatigue outweighs her desire to listen to me read, and her eyes close as she drifts into slumber.
I close the book, lean down to kiss Milan’s cheeks, adjust her blankets, and then leave her room after returning the book.
My heart rate increases as I pull the door up, but I leave it cracked just in case she wakes up.
I take a couple of breaths and then head to my living room.
When I hit the corner and see Sincere with his right leg crossed over his left, my body temperature rises.
Sincere looks comfortable and relaxed, like he’s been doing this for years. I like the way he looks on my couch.
“Hey. Were you able to get Sweet Face to sleep?”
His voice startles me as I snap out of my temporary trance and walk over to take a seat beside him. Thoughts of climbing into his lap, as I wrap my arms around his neck, fill my mind, causing a delayed response.
“Mm-hmm. She’s out like a light. Thank you for hanging with us today. Milan had a great time.”
“Hm. Was she the only one?”
My heart bangs like a gong in my chest when Sincere’s intense eyes connect with mine as I stare wordlessly for a few seconds. My pussy purrs and thumps as I analyze how to answer his question.
“No.” It’s a low, breathy response that causes Sincere’s eyes to darken with lust.
It seems to be the battery I need in my back as I throw caution to the wind and move toward him.
With his eyes intently watching me, Sincere uncrosses his leg as I straddle him.
My arms go around his neck as my breaths become labored.
The second I’m seated in his lap, something heavy bumps against my core, and I peer into Sincere’s eyes just as he speaks.
“How sturdy is this couch?”
Time stands still as a shiver of arousal causes a zing of current to hit my pearl. Without answering, I lean in and connect our lips. At this point, we’re about to find out together.