18. Journee
I knew the turtleneck was a bad idea, but I hoped I had a little time to come up with a reason for wearing it.
I didn’t expect to open my door and come face-to-face with Sincere and Jamarion.
Murder didn’t rest only in Jamarion’s eyes either.
Right before my eyes, Sincere’s expression changed and had me wondering if some of Jamarion’s hood qualities lie beneath his suit attire.
Emotionally, I have been a mess, and based on Sincere’s pop-up, I didn’t do a good enough job of replying to his messages.
I have limited our communication to text because I have spent days sorting through ideas about how to handle BN.
I’m also unsure how he found out where I live, but I didn’t open my door to find out either.
“Brue, Cere.” Milan’s voice snaps me out of my head as I focus on the scene in front of me.
Sincere is on the floor with Milan in his lap as they color in one of the many books Mom has bought for her.
This is the moment that is a treasure that wasn’t on my bingo card today.
It’s what I need to push through the raw emotions I’ve had to swallow to not alert Milan to my distress.
BN’s initial banging had Milan hugging my leg and crying hysterically, and it took me a couple of minutes to calm her down.
I was able to soothe her with some ice cream while enjoying it in my bed as she watched one of her favorite movies.
I had just come back to my living room when I thought I heard Sincere’s voice.
After Jamarion hugged me and left my apartment, Sincere said we would talk later, his attention momentarily shifting to Milan.
I didn’t want to leave his arms, but holding him longer would have only caused Milan to focus on me and my sad disposition.
For the benefit of my baby, I got myself together and put on the front that has Milan comfortably bonding with Sincere.
“It looks great, Sweet Face,” Sincere tells Milan as her face brightens with merriment.
Sincere looks relaxed, unlike his countenance when we connected not long ago.
But Milan is capable of softening the Grinch after one encounter.
As I watch them interact and Milan giggle, I ponder what type of father Sincere would be.
I wonder if he wants kids, marriage, or anything permanent.
Heck, I even consider whether he would accept a ready-made family like the one Milan and I are.
“Mommy, look. Pwetty.”
I smile at Milan before my gaze shifts to Sincere’s eyes. In them, I see questions and concerns that cause me to slide onto the floor and scoot until the three of us are close enough to breathe each other’s air.
“You did a great job, baby. It’s very pretty. How about you go put it on the fridge with your other one?”
Milan excitedly claps and hops out of Sincere’s lap as she runs to the kitchen to display her new artwork.
“I’m worried about you, baby, and the light being out of your eyes has me ready to surrender my law license.”
My heart flutters and skips a beat at the low and genuine sincerity within Sincere’s words.
In his eyes, I see adoration and concern that fills me with appreciation for his presence in my life.
I wanted to run from him so I didn’t subject him to BN’s mess.
But in this moment, I would rather bask in the feel of his affection toward me.
I lean in and kiss his lips, hoping to convey my gratitude.
“I’m better now that you’re here.”
“Good. I’m not going anywhere. Matter of fact, go pack a bag for you and Sweet Face. I’m taking y’all to my house.”
A small smile forms as I nod my agreement, as I would like nothing more than to spend the night in his arms. Wordlessly, I stand and leave the room to do his bidding.
My first stop is Milan’s room as I pack her something to sleep in, wear tomorrow, and then her essentials.
Once that’s done, I return to the living room to drop off her bag.
Then I move to my bedroom to do the same thing for myself.
The trees fly by as fast as the thoughts in my head as I follow Sincere to his house.
Sincere wanted the three of us to ride together, but with both of us having to work tomorrow and Milan needing to go to my parents’ house, separate vehicles were necessary.
I’m not about to inconvenience Sincere with being my chauffeur.
It’s what I told him, but I’m not sure if he heard me, since all he said was for me to follow him, and then we would drive together to dinner.
Milan is oblivious to everything but her music playlist as she happily sings along.
Since I’m following Sincere, I don’t pay attention to exactly where we’re going.
My preoccupied mind has me only focused on staying close to Sincere so I don’t lose him.
Sincere turns onto Merriam Court and then pulls into the driveway of a two-story modern house with an attached garage.
When the door lifts, Sincere pulls in as he waves for me to follow him inside.
The door lowers once I pull into the empty space to the left of Sincere’s vehicle.
“Where I am, Mommy?” Milan questions just as I put my vehicle in park and turn in her direction.
“We’re at Cere’s house.”
Milan’s face lights up like a Christmas tree as all thirty-two of her teeth show.
“Ooh. I lub it.” Milan gushes just as Sincere opens my back door, and she shifts her attention to him. “Your house, Cere?”
I giggle for the first time in days as I watch Milan’s little brows hike in question, as if she needs confirmation from Sincere directly.
“Yep. Come on so I can give you and Mommy a tour.” Sincere unbuckles Milan’s safety belt and helps her out.
Before I have a chance to open my own door, Sincere pulls it open and holds his hands out for me to take.
“With me, opening doors is no longer your job.”
My lips upturn as I stand to my full height and take Sincere’s hand as he leads Milan and me into his home.
The smell of lemons fills my nostrils upon entering the hallway.
We step into it as I take in the red oak-style hardwood floor.
It shines bright enough for you to see your reflection as Sincere begins the tour.
The first room we reach is the kitchen, and I marvel at the large space, black stainless steel appliances, and the island with seating for four.
“You cook, right?”
Sincere chuckles as he nods before he provides his answer.
“Of course I do. I was a single man who didn’t have anyone but himself to rely on to eat.”
“I would hope so, because this kitchen would have me inspired to make all types of dishes.”
“Well, anytime you want to show me your culinary skills, it’s open to you.”
I smile as we continue on and come to a half bath not too far from the kitchen.
Milan peeks inside and frowns slightly as if she’s not impressed with the room.
Meanwhile, I’m impressed by its cleanliness.
Based on the floors, kitchen, and this bathroom, I can already tell that Sincere keeps a very tidy and well-maintained home.
The living room is more of the same, and Sincere leads us up to the second level, where four bedrooms are located.
Two of the bedrooms are empty, and the third is set up like a guest room.
“Sweet Face, this is your room for the night,” Sincere tells Milan, smiling and nodding in agreement. “Do you want to watch a movie while I show Mommy the last room?”
“Yessh.” Milan claps happily as Sincere helps her onto the queen-size bed that swallows her once she sits on top of the blankets.
Sincere turns on the mounted TV and then selects a movie of Milan’s choosing while I stand next to the door, watching.
I’m in awe of how gentle and patient Sincere is with Milan as well as how much she takes to him without a fight.
Once Milan is set, Sincere connects our hands and leads me to the room I assume is his.
Oddly, my heart rate increases the closer we get to the shut double doors.
“I look forward to sharing my space with you tonight, baby,” Sincere says before he releases my hand to open the doors.
“So do I.”
Sincere’s bedroom comes into view as I take it all in.
His bed is as big as mine but rests on a platform.
Unlike my purple and silver decor, Sincere’s colors are charcoal gray and navy blue.
I feel instantly calm and lighter once I’m fully inside the room as I take in everything.
The walls are charcoal gray while his bedding is navy blue.
There’s a medium gray rug next to the bed, and the floors here are also hardwood, continuing the theme from downstairs.
“I would never leave this room if I lived here,” I say.
“Trust me, some days it’s hard. But life doesn’t let me do anything except sleep in this room. I learned from my pops that the bedroom isn’t for recreational purposes. At least it didn’t used to be. I’m definitely looking forward to exploring that perk with you in the future.”
A shiver of awareness causes my pearl to thump when Sincere’s eyes momentarily become lust-filled.
I don’t have a chance to reply when he guides me to another door.
Unlike the entrance to this room, this one looks like a barn door, sliding on a track to open.
My mouth drops open when I see the space that would be my sanctuary even more than the bedroom.
There is a large countertop that hosts two sinks, and not just any sink either.
These are glass, bowl-like structures that pique my curiosity as I release Sincere’s hand to test them.
When the water comes out like a waterfall, I giggle with merriment.
As if I’m not impressed enough by this portion of the room, the glass-door shower with enough space for three people has me anxious to use it.
Then there’s a separate clawfoot tub that I have to put to use to unwind in before I climb into bed with Sincere tonight.
“We’ll put Sweet Face to bed, and then I’ll prepare a hot bath so you can let me in on what you’ve been keeping from me the last two days.”
Sincere wraps his arms around my frame, and instead of dreading that conversation, I simply nod my agreement.
I can’t dodge this conversation any longer, and I’m curious to hear what advice Sincere might offer from a legal perspective.
I’ve been over the ins and outs of my situation for days, and I still have no answers.
Given BN’s impatience and unwillingness to leave, I need help.
So, it’s time I let my man in, so a solution can be obtained because even superwoman gets tired sometimes.