15. Carla
CHAPTER 15
Carla
I froze outside the kitchen, my hand hovering over the bathroom doorknob as Eli’s words drifted through the doorway behind me.
“...just here to help out, Dad. Don’t read too much into it.”
My stomach clenched. Just last night, he’d gazed into my eyes and whispered how he’d never stopped caring about me. Now he was dismissing our connection like it was nothing more than yesterday’s coffee grounds.
I should’ve known better. The charming firefighter routine, those soulful looks—it was all part of Eli Wells’ playbook. And here I was, falling for it hook, line, and sinker. Again.
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I plastered on a smile and strode into the living room where Nathan’s boys were sprawled on the floor, surrounded by a sea of Legos.
“Alright, munchkins,” I announced, clapping my hands. “It’s time for us to get going.”
Predictably, a chorus of groans erupted.
“But, Miss Carla,” Linc whined, brandishing a half-built spaceship, “we’re not finished!”
“Yeah,” piped up Joey, his chubby cheeks flushed with indignation, “we gotta save the galaxy!”
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “The galaxy will still need saving at home. Come on, space cadets. Get your stuff together so your grandpa can rest.”
As I herded the boys toward the door, a whirlwind of limbs and giggles, I caught sight of Eli emerging from the kitchen. Our eyes met for a brief moment, and I quickly looked away, focusing on Joey’s wildly swinging LEGO creation.
“Whoa there, buddy,” I said, ducking to avoid decapitation by plastic brick. “Let’s get that masterpiece to a safe landing pad, okay?”
The boys’ boundless energy was contagious, momentarily pushing thoughts of Eli to the back of my mind. As Linc regaled me with a detailed description of their intergalactic adventure, complete with sound effects, I found myself genuinely smiling.
“...and then the alien queen was all like, ‘Pew pew pew!’” Linc exclaimed, bouncing on the couch.
“Sounds like quite the battle.” I laughed, fishing LEGO pieces out from under the couch.
As I helped Joey wiggle into his coat, my traitorous mind drifted back to Eli. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, how his strong hands had felt on my legs on the couch.
No. I shook my head, banishing those thoughts. I’d built up walls for a reason. No matter how much my heart did an eager little dance around him, I couldn’t let myself get hurt again. Last night was just a fluke. I should have listened to my instincts.
I spent the rest of the day firmly entrenched in the boys’ space adventures – and avoiding too much interaction with Eli.
“Aunt Carla?” Joey’s voice snapped me back to reality. “Can you tell us a story?” I’d successfully made it to bedtime without crying. I guess Operation Don’t-Let-Eli-Know-He-Broke-My-Heart: The Sequel was a rousing success.
I ruffled his hair, pushing aside my inner turmoil. “Of course, sweetie. Let’s get you tucked in first.”
As I settled onto the edge of Linc’s bed, both boys snuggled under their covers, I heard footsteps in the hallway. My pulse quickened, knowing it was Eli, probably coming to say good night.
I took a deep breath to steady myself. I might not be able to control how I felt, but I could control how I acted. And right now, these boys needed a bedtime story, not the mess of emotions swirling inside me.
“Once upon a time,” I began, my voice steady, “in a galaxy far, far away...”
Eli ducked into the room, and my heart did a little flutter despite my best efforts. I kept my focus on the boys, determined not to let his presence derail me.
“Hey, munchkins,” Eli’s warm voice filled the room. “Room for one more at story time?”
“Uncle Eli!” Joey squealed, his arms flailing with excitement. “We’re gonna hear ‘bout space heroes!”
I glanced up, catching Eli’s eye for a brief moment. His smile seemed genuine, but there was tension in his shoulders that hadn’t been there earlier. He perched on the edge of Joey’s bed, and I couldn’t help but notice how his presence seemed to fill the small room.
“Space heroes, huh?” Eli grinned, ruffling Joey’s hair. “Sounds like my kind of story. You guys are gonna grow up to be real-life heroes someday, aren’t you?”
Alex puffed out his chest. “I’m gonna be a firefighter like you and Daddy.”
“That so?” Eli’s eyes twinkled. “Well, you better listen to Miss Carla’s story then. Firefighters need to be good listeners.”
I cleared my throat, trying to ignore the warmth that spread through me at Eli’s easy way with the boys. It was moments like these that made it so hard to keep my distance. I launched back into the story, weaving a tale of brave space explorers and daring rescues.
As I spoke, my hands moved of their own accord, helping Joey into his pajama top. My fingers fumbled with the buttons, my mind split between the story and the man sitting just a few feet away. I couldn’t help but wonder – if things had been different, could this have been our life? Eli and me, putting our own children to bed?
I pushed the thought away, focusing on Joey’s giggles as I tickled his tummy. “And then,” I continued, “the brave captain had to make a choice...”
I felt Eli’s eyes on me as I spun the tale, his gaze like a physical touch. Every time I glanced his way, he was there, drinking in the scene with an intensity that made my heart skip. Stop it, Carla, I scolded myself. He’s not the settling-down type, remember?
“What happened next, Miss Carla?” Linc bounced on the bed, his eyes wide with excitement.
I smiled, pushing my conflicted feelings aside. “Well, the captain had to choose between saving his crew or rescuing the alien princess.”
“Save the princess!” Joey shouted, nearly toppling off the bed in his enthusiasm.
Eli chuckled, steadying the boy with a gentle hand. “Easy there, space cadet. What do you think, Alex? Crew or princess?”
As the boys debated the captain’s dilemma, I couldn’t help but notice how Eli had inched closer, our knees almost touching as we sat on the edge of the bed. The proximity sent a jolt through me, and I struggled to keep my voice steady.
“In the end,” I continued, “the captain found a way to save everyone.”
“Just like a real hero,” Eli murmured, his eyes meeting mine for a brief, electric moment.
I swallowed hard, reminding myself of all the reasons I needed to keep my distance. As the last giggles faded and yawns took their place, a hush fell over the room. The soft glow of the nightlight cast shadows on the walls, and I could almost feel the weight of our history settling around us.
I tucked Joey in, smoothing his hair back from his forehead. “Sweet dreams, space explorer.”
“G’night, Miss Carla,” he mumbled, already half-asleep. I repeated the gesture with Linc, and then walked Alex to his room across the hall, tucking him in before slipping back out into the dim light of the living room.
I turned to find Eli’s eyes on me, dark and intense. I couldn’t look away. It was like being pulled into orbit, helpless against the gravity of his gaze. My heart did that familiar flip, and I silently cursed its betrayal.
Eli cleared his throat softly. “You’re really good with them,” he said, his voice low and husky.
“Thanks,” I whispered back, forcing myself to break eye contact. “It’s kind of my job.”
I busied myself folding the blankets from the couch, hyper-aware of Eli’s presence. When I glanced up again, he had moved to stand by the kitchen, his posture stiff and tense. His hands were clenched into fists at his sides, and I could see the muscles in his jaw working.
Why does he have to look so... ugh. I pushed the thought away, focusing on tidying the living room. But I could feel the weight of Eli’s gaze, like a physical thing pressing down on me. It was all I could do not to squirm under the intensity of it.
Part of me wanted to say something, to break this charged silence. But what could I possibly say that wouldn’t make things worse? So I kept my mouth shut, pretending I couldn’t feel the electricity crackling in the air between us.
“Well,” I said, my voice sounding unnaturally loud in the quiet room, “I should probably head to bed.”
Eli nodded, his dark eyes unreadable. “Right. Yeah.” He stepped aside, giving me just enough room to squeeze past him.
As I moved through the doorway, I caught a whiff of his cologne—a mix of woodsy and spicy that made my stomach do a little flip. Traitor, I scolded it silently.
“So, um,” Eli started, following me into the hallway. “Rebecca and Nathan are coming back on Sunday, right?”
I nodded, grateful for the neutral topic. “Yeah, their flight gets in around noon. I promised to pick them up.”
“That’s... nice of you,” he said, his words stilted and formal. It was like we were strangers making small talk at a bus stop, not two people with years of history between them. Two people who’d kissed earlier.
“You’ve got a shift at the station tomorrow, don’t you?” I asked, desperate to keep the conversation going, even as I berated myself for prolonging this awkward dance.
“Yeah, bright and early,” Eli confirmed, running a hand through his dark hair. “And then Thanksgiving dinner at my parents’ on Thursday.”
We stood there for a beat too long, the silence stretching between us like a chasm neither of us knew how to cross. I found myself wondering what he was thinking, if he was as conflicted as I was. But I squashed that thought ruthlessly. It didn’t matter. It couldn’t matter.
I retreated to my room, my hand trembling slightly as I closed the door behind me. The soft click of the latch felt like a gunshot in the quiet hallway, and I leaned against the wood, letting out a shaky breath.
I pushed off the door and paced the bedroom. My mind was a whirlwind, replaying every moment of the day on an endless loop. Eli’s words echoed on repeat. It’s not like that.
And yet… I wanted it to be exactly like that. I wanted him to tell his dad to shove it. I wanted him to choose me. And he hadn’t. And even with my heart bruised and bleeding from the knowledge that I cared way more about him than he did about me, I still had to physically restrain myself from tucking myself into his arms tonight.
I flopped onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling fan as it lazily spun above me. “Why does he have to be so... Eli?” I groaned, throwing an arm over my eyes.
The memory of his gentle interactions with the boys tugged at my heart. It was so at odds with the image I’d built up of him as the town playboy. I’d seen a glimpse of the man he could be—caring, attentive, patient. The kind of man I’d always dreamed of having a family with.
I sat up abruptly. I wasn’t doing this again. He made his choice. I heard him talking to his dad. It’s not like that. She’s just helping out.
But even as I tried to convince myself, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to the story. The way he’d looked at me when we said good night... it was like he was trying to tell me something without words.
I shook my head, trying to clear it. It didn’t matter. I was leaving in a few days. Back to my life, my students, my…
I trailed off, realizing I couldn’t think of anything else waiting for me back home that felt as vibrant and alive as the past few days had been. Even with all the tension and complicated history, being here—being around Eli—made me feel more like myself than I had in years.
I punched my pillow into shape with more force than necessary. I was just... nostalgic. That’s all this was. Nostalgia and... really impressive biceps.
I flopped back down, willing sleep to come and silence the conflicting voices in my head. But as I drifted off, one thought kept circling: How was I supposed to keep my distance when everything in me wanted to draw closer?