Chapter 51 – Remi
Fifty-One
Remi
Dead.
I lean back against the elevator wall and close my eyes. Today has been one hell of a day, and saying I’m completely drained and ready to collapse into bed is an understatement.
It took nearly an hour to calm my parents down and convince them not to march straight to some of the local heads of The Six to demand answers about how Rafe knew the organization existed and, even worse, how our names and identities had somehow been caught up in the leak.
They can pretend Thiago doesn’t fully have their trust, but if I weren’t with him right now, I’m pretty sure both of them would be banging on my door, ready to drag me back home.
“Tired?” he asks, nudging my shoulder.
“Exhausted.” I open my eyes to find his. “It’s been a while since I’ve shot up the town.”
The corner of his mouth twitches, but the smile never comes. Instead, he looks away, and that tiny shift has my mind instantly filling in the blanks.
How do you explain any of tonight to a cop?
Sure, Thiago didn’t call for backup or turn me in. He even helped me get away, which should be enough to convince me he isn’t going anywhere. But he still doesn’t know the whole truth.
And if he ever does...
Before I can follow that thought any further, Thiago slips one arm beneath my thighs and the other around my back, lifting me into his arms just as the elevator doors slide open. Apparently, whatever is on his mind isn’t enough to make him put any distance between us.
“I thought I told you I could walk.”
“You’re exhausted, chama.” His gaze meets mine. “Let me take care of you for five minutes.”
Fuck.
Why does he have to say things like that?
I reach for the biometric pad and let it scan my fingers while I remain exactly where I am in his arms. The deadbolts click open, and Thiago carries me across the threshold.
“How romantic,” I tease.
He starts to answer, but a faint rustle from somewhere inside the apartment steals my attention.
“Wait.” I wriggle out of his arms, and he sets me gently on my feet. “Shh.”
His brow furrows as I take a slow step forward. Behind me, I hear the unmistakable metallic click as a round is chambered.
“Remi,” he whispers. “What’s going on?”
Without looking back, I raise one hand to stop him and press a finger to my lips. “Quiet.” I reach for the light switch and scan the living room. Another rustle makes me pause. At the edge of the sofa, the tip of a familiar tail disappears beneath it. “Shit.”
“Shit?” he repeats through gritted teeth. “Remi, what the hell is going on?”
“Clarice.”
“Clarice?”
I look back at him. “Yeah. My pit viper. The venomous one. She got out.”
“Shit.”
His eyes widen as they sweep the room. Without a second thought, he steps in front of me, pushing me behind him with one arm and keeping his gun at the ready in the other.
It’s probably ridiculous to think about shooting a snake, but that isn’t what gets me. Once again, his first instinct is to put himself between me and anything that could hurt me.
Damn him.
I rest my hand on his bicep, and the solid muscle beneath my palm gives me a perfectly good excuse to leave it there a second longer than necessary.
“Thiago, I’ve got this. This isn’t the first time she’s escaped. Sometimes I rush after feeding her and forget to fully secure the enclosure.”
He slowly lowers his gun, then drags a hand down his face. “Remi, baby, that’s…”
“A little careless. I know, I know.” I give him a sheepish look. “Just stay here.”
As I move past him, Thiago catches my elbow, suddenly serious. “Be careful.”
I nod, unable to hold back my smile. “You like me, huh?”
Now he’s the one fighting a smile. “Go get your snake, fera,” he says, though something in his eyes makes it hard to look away.
I force myself to anyway and head for the coat closet to grab my snake hook. “Stay back,” I tell him.
“You don’t have to tell me twice.”
I approach the sofa carefully and crouch far enough away that Clarice can’t strike if she’s startled. Before I can get a good look beneath it, she slithers out the opposite side and makes a beeline for the hallway.
“Oh, no, you don’t.” I follow at a safe distance until she slows. “Clarice, play nice, and I’ll have a fat, juicy mouse waiting for you at your next feeding. Your favorite.”
She stops and coils, lifting her head as I keep the snake hook between us.
“Easy, girl.” I lower my voice as I watch her. “See that big guy back there?” Looking over my shoulder, I toss Thiago a wink. “He kind of likes me, and he has pretty good aim, so let’s not give him a reason to find out if he can hit a small, moving target, okay?”
When she finally relaxes enough for me to move closer, I carefully slide the hook beneath the front third of her body.
Surprisingly, she doesn’t protest. She lets me lift her without so much as a hiss.
Behind me, Thiago lets out a breath, and I don’t have to look at him to know it has nothing to do with being afraid of Clarice.
Damn him again.
By the time I return her to the enclosure and double-check the latch, Thiago is sitting on the couch, with two glasses of iced water waiting on the coffee table.
I mean to sit beside him, but before I reach the cushion, he catches me around the waist and pulls me onto his lap.
“Did you remember to lock it this time?”
“Ha ha.” I roll my eyes. “Go ahead. Make your jokes. I forget things sometimes, okay? Sue me.”
I’m not offended in the slightest, but his smile still fades, and his arm tightens around me. “I didn’t mean it that way.” He searches my face. “You know that, right?”
“I know.”
I do.
Maybe that’s why being this vulnerable with him scares me so much.
Thiago doesn’t make me feel like I have to explain every part of myself or apologize for the parts that aren’t always easy.
He just seems to understand me. Even now, we can sit here in silence, and I don’t feel the need to fill it. With him, I can simply exist in it.
I curl my fingers into his collar and meet his eyes.
We have a conversation pending, and I don’t know how much of myself I’m ready to give him. Part of me wants to tear everything open and let him see it all, even the darkest ones, while the other part is terrified of what might happen if I do.
So I give him what I can.
“Things got out of control today.”
He nods. “A little.”
I almost smile. “I am who I am, Braga. It started as a race and ended badly. You see the worst of society every day, so you know there are ruthless people out there.”
His hand glides slowly along my back.
“I grew up in a family that prepared us for people like that. My parents taught us to survive the ugliest parts of this world. They taught us never to back down and never to let ourselves become victims.”
Thiago doesn’t interrupt. He just listens.
“So when someone comes for me, or worse, for the people I love…I’m going to stop them.” I force myself to hold his gaze. “Whatever it takes.”
His body goes still beneath me.
“I need you to know that about me.”
He’s quiet for a moment, then asks softly, “Self-defense?” It sounds less like a question for me than one he’s asking himself.
I know what he’s doing. Maybe we both do.
“Self-defense.”
He stares at me for another second before his hand resumes its slow path along my back. “Your mom is one hell of a shot.”
The abrupt change in subject catches me off guard, and I laugh.
“She sure is. She taught me everything I know. I grew up surrounded by some pretty badass women.”
“Explains a lot.”
“Yeah.” I stroke his cheek with my thumb. “It’s not too late to run, you know.”
Thiago shakes his head as his eyes close beneath my touch. “The fuck it’s not.”
I lean in and kiss him. Maybe I’m biased, but this man has the softest, most kissable lips I’ve ever known. “Thiago,” I whisper against his mouth. “Will you stay with me tonight?”
He opens his eyes. “Baby, there isn’t a single thing in this world that would make me leave you.”
I cup his face, brushing my nose against the scruff along his jaw. “I hate you.”
That gets a laugh out of him. “That’s definitely not what I expected you to say.”
“It’s true.” I shake my head. “I hate how easy this is with you. How easily I let you past every wall I’ve spent years building. I tell you things I don’t tell anyone, and half the time, I don’t even realize I’m doing it until it’s already out there.”
He’s serious now.
“And the worst part is that I don’t regret any of it. But…”
Thiago waits, his hand still against me. “Tell me.”
I look down at where my fingers grip his shirt. “I’m afraid.”
His eyebrows draw together. “What are you afraid of?”
There’s a vulnerability in his voice I haven’t heard before.
“I’m afraid I don’t know how to do this, Thiago.
Whatever this is growing between us.” I lift my eyes to his.
“I’m afraid I’ll fuck it up. That eventually you’ll see all of me, not the girl in the mugshot or the version of me that’s fun to chase around the city, and realize I don’t fit into your world. ”
He starts to speak, but I shake my head.
“Tonight is a perfect example. I meant what I said. I’ll never be the girl who backs down. But you’re a cop.” I pause. “I can’t be the reason you throw away everything you’ve worked for.”
“Remi, you have to let me decide what I’m willing to risk.”
“I know, but—”
“No.” His hand comes up to my face. “Look at me.”
I do.
“I already know you’re not the woman strangers online think they know. I’ve seen enough of the real you to know she’s the one I want to keep getting to know.”
I study his face, searching for even a hint of hesitation, but there isn’t one.
“And yes, I might have more questions about how the hell you and your mom cleared a highway full of murderous assholes. But I’m still here, aren’t I?”
I smile and nod. “So you’re saying I’m not as scary as I thought?”
“Baby, you’re terrifying.” He laughs. “And I never want to piss your mom off.”
“That’s probably wise.”
Thiago’s hand comes to rest against the side of my neck. “But you can’t scare me away.”
“I hear you, but…you don’t know what it’s like inside my head. I can’t shut it off. Sometimes…” My voice softens. “Sometimes I forget to breathe. Or to latch the enclosure of a deadly snake.”
He chuckles and brushes his lips against mine. “Then I’ll remind you to breathe and to double-check the damn snake enclosure.”
I smile against his mouth. “You make this sound easy.”
“I didn’t say it would be easy. I said I’m not going anywhere.” He kisses me again, slower, softer. “You make me feel something I haven’t felt in a long time, Remi.”
“What’s that?” I whisper.
He goes quiet, looking at me with an intensity that makes it impossible to look anywhere else. “Alive.”
The word knocks the air from my lungs.
Oh, I’m so fucked.
“This is exactly why I hate you,” I murmur.
“I hate you too, chama.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah.” His thumb traces the curve of my jaw. “I hate those beautiful blue eyes.”
“Everyone does.” I shift over his lap and loop my arms around his neck.
“I hate your smart mouth.”
“You seemed pretty fond of it the other night.”
His eyes darken. “Very fond.”
I grin. “What else?”
“I hate that fucking lollipop.”
I gasp. “Take it back.”
“Never.”
“That might actually be a dealbreaker, Braga.”
His hand slides into mine, and he turns it over before pressing a kiss onto it.
“And I really fucking hate how right this feels.”
The teasing falls away as our eyes meet.
“Thiago…”
His phone vibrates in his pocket before I can say anything else.
“Go ahead,” I tell him. “After today, who knows what kind of fresh hell has taken over Philly?”
He pulls out his phone and lets out a breath as he reads the screen.
“It’s Ryan. Letting me know the commander was pulled overseas for the next several days.”
“Oh.” I feign disappointment. “I’m sure everyone will miss her.”
Thiago chuckles, tosses his phone onto the coffee table, then grips my ass with both hands and stands, taking me with him.
“You still owe me a movie night, chama.”
“It’s a good thing I restocked on popcorn and lollipops.”
“Perfect.” He carries me down the hallway. “But first, we’re washing this day off us.”
“Agreed.”
He makes it a few steps before stopping.
“You definitely locked Clarice’s enclosure, right?”
I’m too busy laughing to answer.