3. Trippin’
Trippin’
At a small table in the back of the Cuthberts on Peachtree, Tatum and Alisa sat in silence as they watched Nadine down her second margarita in less than ten minutes. She’d insisted that they meet her, declaring it was an emergency. But she hadn’t said a word, just drank.
“Yeah,” chimed Tatum. “I had to reschedule a department meeting for this. As the new chair of the English department, I can’t afford to be away from campus right now. What’s up with all the secrecy?”
Nadine downed the last of her margarita. “I’m sorry. It’s just…” She burst out into tears, which was out of character for Nadine. She was always so stoic. So put together.
Tatum and Alisa looked at each other stunned. Slightly embarrassed, Nadine wiped her tears with the black cloth napkin and collected herself.
“I think Eddie is unhappy. Maybe he wants to leave me.”
“Oh girl,” sighed Alisa. “Where is this coming from? You know Eddie worships the ground you walk on.”
Nadine pointed her finger. “I have proof…I think.”
“Proof?” Tatum rolled her eyes. “Ok, Deanie. What does that even mean? What kind of proof?”
“Well, he’s been acting really strange. I mean, Eddie has always had his ways, but he's turned it up a notch.”
“Turned up a notch, how?” asked Alisa. Her stomach was so big she could barely lean forward.
Nadine sniffed, dabbing her red cheeks with the napkin. “We used to communicate, and now he’s giving me short answers all the time. He’s coming home later and later, blaming it on work.”
“This is his first year as a head coach. Give him grace,” Tatum gently suggested. Alisa nodded, agreeing.
“It isn’t just work. It’s much worse.”
Alisa frowned. “How is it worse?”
Nadine leaned closer across the table. “He is watching very different porn. I caught him red handed. Well, not really handed. His hand down in his pants, jerking off to it.”
“How different? Like pregnant grandmas? Or Brazilian little people?” asked Alisa.
“Is that really a thing?” asked Tatum, an amused smirk on her face.
“Probably. Anything is possible in the porn world.” Alisa shrugged.
“No!” whisper-screeched Nadine. “Not that. Now it’s a lot of…threesomes. Very specific kinds of threesomes.”
“Specific how? I wish your ass would get to the point!” Alisa was frustrated and hangry. The twins were doing a number on her and she regretted leaving the house without a snack.
“Fine! It’s threesomes with the husband watching his wife get fucked by other people. Men, Women. You name it. Video after video of the same scenario.”
Nadine had woken up an hour early to do a thorough search of Eddie’s porn history.
Shocked wasn’t even the word she could use to describe the things she saw.
Husbands getting peed on, jerked off on, whipped.
All while tied up. All while watching their spouse or partners get fucked out of their minds.
There was a beat of silence before Tatum and Alisa looked at each other and burst out laughing. Nadine couldn’t believe her two best friends were laughing at her plight. She was pissed. Her life was literally blowing up and they thought it was hilarious.
“Nadine, I know damn well you didn’t call a meeting because Eddie has been looking at threesome porn,” laughed Tatum.
“Of course, you’d laugh, Miss Taking-Three-Dicks-At-A-Time, but Eddie isn’t like that. Why would he wanna watch someone fuck his wife? He’s never mentioned anything like that to me before. I thought we shared everything. There are no secrets between us.”
“First off, Imma let that slick comment slide.” Tatum signaled the waiter so she could order something stronger than the sweet tea that she was drinking.
She was going to need it. “Secondly, what’s wrong with his porn preferences?
Many men have unusual fantasies. That’s normal.
Besides, Deanie, it isn’t like you’re the most open-minded person when it comes to sex. ”
Nadine chewed her lip. “While that may be true, he still could talk to me. This isn’t normal for Eddie! Maybe he’s trying to say something. Maybe I’m not enough. Maybe I’m…”
“Or maybe,” Alisa interrupted. “The man is bored, Nadine. Maybe he’s embarrassed to share it with you because you may shame him.”
Nadine blinked. “I wouldn’t shame him!”
Alisa raised an accusatory brow. “You sure about that? Because you damn sure shamed me and Tate and our situations.”
Maybe I am kind of shaming him, actually. Dr. Flournoy would definitely say I am shaming him. Nadine folded her arms across her chest defensively. “Well, excuse me if some of us aren't willing to get cum shot up in us every-which-way.”
Tatum choked on her Cosmo. Alisa looked as if she was ready to box Nadine upside the head, pregnant or not. When she felt backed into a corner, Nadine reverted to being snide. She regretted saying that the second it came out her mouth.
“That felt like judgment, hoe.” Alisa fumed as she tapped her fingers on the table.
Tatum agreed. “That was hurtful Nadine.”
“I’m sorry but…”
“Ain’t no sorry,” Alisa interrupted. “Don’t be mad because our sex lives are jumping and yours is on life support.”
“Is it really jumping if you don’t know which one of your husbands is the father of your kids? Stirring up sperm like cake batter.”
“Nadine!” Tatum hissed, slapping her head in frustration.
Nadine bit her lip. She just couldn’t turn off being a bitch sometimes. God, she really was turning into her mother.
Alisa’s eye was twitching. Tatum shook her head, rubbing Alisa’s back. “Don’t get worked up, Alisa, the babies…”
Alisa had had enough. “Nadine, I’ll knock your ass between this booth and the wall. Pregnant or not. Keep on fucking with me!”
Tatum looked around the restaurant, hoping no one had heard them. “Lower your voices, you two!”
Alisa threw her hands up. “See what I mean? Judgmental. When is the last time you even fucked Eddie without counting the number of pumps? No wonder Eddie is looking at hella porn with your stale pussy ass.”
“Stale pussy?” Nadine was turning every shade of red. “Really, Alisa…”
Alisa was on a roll. “You act like you’re so damn perfect. Always have. I know you’ve got secrets too, Deanie. You just pretend like you don’t because you got your perfect image to uphold!”
“I don’t have any secrets!” Nadine swallowed that whole lie, as it stuck like a rock in her throat.
“Okay! Okay!” Tatum interrupted, trying to cool down the situation.
“Let’s not go there, y’all.” She turned to Nadine.
“Babe, why don’t you just talk to Eddie?
Be honest. Ask him what he wants to explore and maybe the two of you can come up with a reasonable compromise. Maybe it’ll reenergize things.”
Nadine shook her head. “I cannot compromise getting fucked by someone else while my husband watches. Especially another man!”
“What do you mean by especially another man?” asked Tatum.
Nadine shrugged, quickly dismissing her answer. “I don’t know why I said that. You know what I mean.”
“Scared you’ll enjoy it?” Alisa raised a brow, a smirk firmly on her lips. “C’mon Deanie. Join me and Tatum on the dark side. Clearly, Eddie wants you to.”
“Ugh, you’re the fucking worst.”
“And you need to learn how to be bad. Always been a good girl with a stick up your ass!”
Some good girl I am, thought Nadine.
Nadine chuckled nervously, hoping that her best friends could see that she was just wound up. Even though beating her ass still wasn’t totally off the table for Alisa. She could see it in her eyes.
Nadine fiddled with her napkin. “It’s just...y’all know how much I compromised in my first marriage. Andrew put me through hell. And I said I’d never change who I was just to please a man. Period.”
Hell was an understatement of the bullshit that Alex’s father, Andrew, put her through.
She thought meeting him her senior year at Spelman was a godsend.
Finally, she could squash all memories of any desire she may have had for anything other than “normalcy.” Nadine had changed herself inside and out for him.
She picked an MBA program that she was just lukewarm on because Andrew got into his dream residency program.
They joined a church that Nadine hated. Andrew had resented her first corporate job, begging her to quit as soon as she got pregnant.
To be honest, the pregnancy was a mystery.
She’d never missed taking her birth control.
Nadine was pretty sure Drew had switched out her pills for placebos.
Even though she was on the fast track to the C-suite, Nadine kept the baby to save her marriage.
Her mother, with her traditional Christian upbringing, convinced her that the pregnancy was a sign that she needed to listen to her husband as the head of the home and focus on being a good wife and mother.
Despite never desiring to be a stay-at-home mom, Nadine convinced herself that maybe it was for the best, pouring everything into her marriage and motherhood.
She figured if she gave her all, then Andrew would too.
If she gave it her all, she could be the wife and mother her parents wanted her to be. What Andrew wanted her to be.