Chapter Eighteen
El
With sweat soaking through my clothes, I was still heaving from my last run-through of my solo as I shoved all my stuff into my dance bag and ran out of the studio.
It was already three, and we had a dinner reservation at five.
Family weekend was here. Our parents wouldn’t be getting in until closer to seven, so we took it as the perfect opportunity to spend quality time with Lane, Crew, Kota, and Bridget. I hadn’t seen them since the summer, when Matt and I went to visit their new place in Chicago for a weekend.
It was a beautiful apartment, overlooking Lake Michigan with floor to ceiling windows and brand-new everything. It was so convenient that they’d moved to the city, which was only an hour and a half away from our hometowns. Now, that hour and a half car ride was more than doubled.
It was going to be really incredible having all my favorite people in one place at the same time this weekend.
All except Hadley and Dina.
My heart still hurt that they couldn’t make it, but I wasn’t going to let it affect my time with everyone else.
Our dinner reservation tonight wasn’t for anywhere fancy, just our local college pub and grill, but since the weekend was so busy, a reservation was needed for anywhere and everywhere.
Jade, Jett, and TJ would also be accompanying us tonight. Since the boys were from Canada, it was much harder for their families to come down for just a short weekend, so they’d be tagging along with us. The other guys had their own family plans going on.
I sped home and busted through my front door, chucking my dance bag before dashing straight to the shower.
Once I felt like every inch of my body no longer smelled like I’d just ran a marathon in Florida, I moved on to doing my makeup.
I wasn’t planning to put much on, just enough to look presentable.
Even though right now, I was the least presentable thing on the planet.
My hair was wrapped up in a towel. I was only wearing a robe. And my skin was not cooperating today.
This was the absolute worst moment for someone to knock on my door.
Peering through the peephole, the only thing I saw at first was the top of a head of black hair. I rose on my tippy toes, seeing the rest of the person finally come into view.
“Jade,” I opened the door, “what are you doing here?”
She smiled one of her infamously mischievous smiles. “I came to raid your closet.”
“Wha—”
She strolled past me, unbothered by my current attire. “I don’t have any good clothes for tomorrow. And you always have cute clothes so.”
“Jade,” I ridiculed, watching her saunter straight to my closet and open the doors like she owned the place.
Over her shoulder, she batted her long, dark lashes at me. She had the same gifted lashes that Matt had, and it wasn’t fair. I’d been jealous of both of them for it my whole life. “C’mon, El. We can get ready for dinner together? Sister bonding time?”
“You look ready now,” I pointed out. Her black jeans, red long sleeve, and combat boots fit her image perfectly. It was an outfit that I wouldn’t be able to pull off in a thousand years. Whereas I’d been called a “good girl” my whole life, she’d been deemed a bad one, and she embraced it.
I couldn’t even be mad at her for wanting to steal my clothes. I used to do the same thing to Lo when we were younger.
When she was fourteen and got her first period while we were on a huge vacation, Jade came to me for help. In high school, she used to call me about boy problems or FaceTime me just to ask if I liked her outfit. I even taught her how to curl her hair and do her eyeliner.
Jade often referred to me as her older sister, and I’d never gotten mushy out loud about it, but I did secretly love it. As the younger sister in my immediate family, it was nice to play the big sister role every once in a while.
“I kinda am,” she admitted. “But I can hang out with you while you get ready!”
Holding back a sigh, I sat back down in my desk chair, focus drifting back to my makeup. “Continue your raid,” I groaned.
“Thank you.”
“I didn’t think my style was really your style.”
“It’s not, really. But you have cute Cedar stuff and I wanted to borrow something for the tailgate.”
“You know that most of the Cedar stuff I have are just Matt’s old shirts that I cut up, right?”
I could spot Jade in my mirror, ring light brightening the red of her shirt. Her grin was devilish. She was having all sorts of ideas spinning around in her mind, I could tell.
“Thanks for the info,” she said.
A few minutes passed of me putting concealer on, silently cursing my skin for still refusing to cooperate.
I’d always had drier skin, and it was extra dry today, to my dismay.
I felt like everything going on my face just looked flaky and gross.
It was discouraging me from putting any further makeup on at all.
Needing a distraction from my quiet devastation, I sputtered, “Alright, give me the tea.”
All I saw was her reflection. Jade was holding a gigantic Cedar U tee, one that I’d redesigned into a dress, up to her body, imagining it on herself in my standing mirror. “What?”
With her back still to me, we were communicating through mirrors. “Do you have a boyfriend?”
“No,” she finally turned.
Briskly, I spun around in my seat. “You look like you’re lying.”
The sound of her laugh hadn’t changed after all these years. It was still that same sweet tone it had been when she was young. It didn’t sound like a harmony meant for such a defiant girl.
“I’m not,” she chuckled. “I don’t have a boyfriend.”
“I won’t tell Matt.”
“I’m not lying!” she laughed harder.
She’d been in college for over a month and a half. There was no way she hadn’t met anyone that she liked even a little bit by now.
I remembered when I first got to college. I had a crush on what felt like every other guy I met. In my defense, everyone had a crush on everyone. People made new connections daily freshman year.
Jade was stunning, captivating even. I’d seen guys drool over her through the years, and I’d also seen Matt scare every single one away.
“Okay,” I pushed, “do you have a situationship?”
“No, not really.”
I grimaced in the mirror. Either this girl was the biggest liar on the planet or her first month of college had been extremely uneventful.
I’d bet money it was the former though.
“A crush?” I asked.
She bobbed her head side to side, making a mess of clothes on my bed that I’d have to deal with later. “Yeah, kinda, I guess. It’s just so hard being Matt’s sister though.”
“Why?”
“No one ever wants to date me because they think Matt’s gonna beat them up!”
He probably would, I thought to myself.
Involuntarily, I stiffened, hoping Jade didn’t catch my hesitation. She wasn’t wrong though. It was a well-known fact that if anyone tried to make a move on Jade, it would result in a fatal outburst.
I opted for, “It’s only because he loves you.”
“I know, I know,” she groaned, pulling even more clothes out of my closet. “He’s just too overprotective. Of you and Lo too.”
I nearly stabbed myself in the eye with the mascara wand from Lo and me entering the conversation.
Matt did beat the shit out of Lo’s ex-boyfriend back in high school after he left her at a restaurant following an argument. Matt was two years younger than the guy at the time, and he left him with two black eyes.
When it came to me, Matt had done more than enough to prove his protectiveness. I didn’t want to think about any of it though. Once I’d fall down that rabbit hole, it was always impossible to crawl out. It was all an endless, manic fever dream when the subject came up.
If Jade hadn’t interrupted my thoughts, I probably would’ve slipped down that rabbit hole.
“How about you?” she wondered. “Are you talking to anyone?”
Hesitation cloaked me again. “No, I—I’m a bit too busy at the moment.”
“Yeah, I get that.”
Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to swerve around this conversation that I had started. Shifting around in my chair, it was becoming hard to focus on my own face.
I released a shaky exhale under my breath. “Have you met Kota and Bridget yet? They’ll be at dinner with us.”
“I’ve met them briefly.”
Nodding, I added, “Lane and Crew will be there too.”
By the time Jade sat down on my bed, tired of looking at every single article of clothing I owned, there was a giant pile in the center of my bed. It was so tall that it was level with her chest as she sat.
“I used to have a crush on Lane,” Jade confessed.
I snickered. “Who didn’t?”
“Did you?”
“Sorta, but not necessarily,” I turned my mirror light off and stood. “It was less of an actual crush and more so just recognition of ‘Wow, Lane’s awesome.’”
“True.”
I hadn’t put much makeup on, just a hint of concealer, mascara, and some blush. Still, I wasn’t very pleased with how it all turned out. I was giving up. If I were to look at myself in that mirror for one more second, I was going to lose my mind.
“Did you find what you wanna wear?” I asked, raising my brows at the mess she’d created.
Shoulders rising and falling with a deep breath, she glanced at the clothes around her and quietly murmured, “Not yet.”
I held back a groan and went to get dressed.