Chapter Forty-One #2
But it’s no use, the storm’s too rough. I’ll be tossed out of the boat as soon as I sit in it.
I wait and watch for the next two hours, my fingers in my mouth, as each bag flies in a different direction, making a mental note of where they’ve gone.
When the storm begins to recede I run back down to the boat.
It’s still rough but I untie the first rope and then the second.
The boat sways violently in the wind. I can’t get in.
I jump down into the chest-high water. I bounce and jump but can’t make it into the boat.
My arms don’t have the strength. I bounce and jump again.
The boat begins to move. Oh God, I’ll lose the boat as well at this rate.
I give an almighty jump this time and tumble head first into it, rolling onto my back.
I’ve done it before, I can do it again, I tell myself, as the Greek holiday comes flooding back. I push it to one side. I have let my fear of ‘what if’ hold me back for too long. What if I don’t do anything! Now that will be a regret.
I grab hold of the rudder. Grace is watching from the shore. I can see the green glints in her eyes as I swing the torch round and suddenly the boat takes off at a lick.
‘Argh!’ I scream and I tumble backwards. I can see the corner of an oyster bag in my torch light, poking up in the water. I steer the boat towards it and scoop it up, dripping with water and seaweed.
‘One!’ I shout at Grace who barks back. A wave crashes against the boat, knocking me sideways.
I quickly put the bag in the boat and grab the rudder.
I guide the boat around the bay. Slowly it’s starting to get light.
At one point I have to put down the anchor and, summoning all my courage, jump out of the boat again.
The water is up to my chest and I climb up the rocks and grab another two bags.
I can see some other bags have blown into the bay next door.
I get back in the boat and head further out.
The wind fills the sail and it takes all my strength to guide the boat round the bay.
In the restaurant the party was in full swing.
It was late, well into the early hours of the morning, but no one seemed to care.
Sean sighed. A long buffet table was being constantly reloaded and glasses of champagne topped up.
There were purple and silver helium balloons on the tables and soft jazz music filled the air, taking the edge off the forced laughter.
Waitresses walked around offering bottles or trays of bite-sized delights.
But none of it tasted of anything to Sean.
The only good thing was that Jean Francois and Monique, Nancy’s parents, were there.
In fact they were about the only people Sean recognised – apart from Henri, that is.
Sean had never liked Henri and had given him a wide berth all night. As had Nancy, surprisingly, until now.
Jean Francois, Monique and Sean had been sitting at a table all night, trying to discuss the worries of the French oyster farmers and the good news about the native oysters.
‘Your uncle would be so proud of you,’ Jean Francois told him, putting his hand over Sean’s. ‘We are proud of you.’
Monique nodded in agreement. ‘You are like family to us.’
The band had slowed things down and people were getting up to dance together, some propping each other up. Henri and Nancy seemed to gravitate towards each other, Sean noticed, as did Jean Francois and Monique.
‘Nancy is a very determined lady,’ Jean Francois said.
‘She is driven and knows what she wants. She can’t bear the thought of being poor again, like she was growing up.
We did our best, but oyster farmers like us, we weren’t rich.
But I was in here,’ he banged his fist to his heart.
Monique nodded in agreement. ‘My heart was full because I loved what I did and I loved my family.’ He put his arm around Monique, who blushed and smiled.
‘It is your heart that matters in life. Make sure it is always full.’
Every single one of Jean Francois’s words made sense to Sean. He looked at Nancy.
Henri and Nancy’s heads seemed to be getting closer and closer as they held one hand and wrapped the other around each other’s waists.
Sean wondered if Nancy remembered he was there at all.
Jean Francois and Monique seemed embarrassed and Sean felt for them.
They were such good people. Strangely, he didn’t feel much himself, just an overwhelming desire for it to be over.
Without Nancy, Sean would lose his farm, but without Fi his heart would be empty. He remembered her words: ‘Watch yourself, don’t get hurt.’ He looked at Nancy again.
‘I think I may have to lose something I love,’ he said out loud to Jean Francois. ‘Nancy is a wonderful woman,’ he said, ‘but I can’t marry her.’ Sean was dying inside, thinking about the pain he must be causing this dear couple.
But suddenly Jean Francois was smiling. ‘You will always be family to us, whether you and Nancy are married or not. Let me give you some words of advice. If you find someone you love, hold on to her very tight. Nothing is more important than love,’ he said and Monique nodded, looking back at Nancy and Henri.
‘They have been in love since they were eight. They’re just too scared to admit it yet. Both too in love with business to have room for love in their lives. Don’t be scared of love, Sean. It’s a gift.’ Monique held her husband’s hand.
Sean watched Nancy and Henri for a moment more and then put down his untouched champagne, kissed Jean Francois and Monique on both cheeks and walked out, just as the singer announced a toast ‘to the happy couple’ and everyone cheered.
As the sun starts to creep up over the horizon, the wind has all but gone and I can see the final few bags that have blown up the shore and onto the bog land beside and behind the sheds. I moor the boat and put the bags in the shed.
When I reach the cottage I find I’m absolutely shattered.
Every bone in my body is aching and I’m soaked.
My stomach turns over and I find myself rushing to the toilet where I’m sick.
I turn on the shower and let hot water pour over me, grateful that it hasn’t chosen this morning to play silly buggers.
My knees are like jelly. The sun is creeping up into the sky and it looks like it’s going to be a nice day.
Once I’m dry, I dress, and give Grace a final pat on the head.
‘Your master’ll be back soon,’ I assure her, and then I pick up my passport and my bag and head for the door. I can’t look back at her. I feel like I’m abandoning her. And it’s so hard, but it’s for all the right reasons.
I can hear a car coming down the lane, which has saved me a walk, as I’m struggling to put one foot in front of the other. I take a final look at the bay. I know I’m leaving having done my best for it and Sean. I turn back to see Sean’s red van pulling into the gates. Behind it is the hackney.
Sean jumps out of the van.
‘I just heard it on the news, about the storm.’ He looks around worried. ‘Are you OK?’
‘They’re all in the shed. They’re all safe,’ I say wearily, and walk to the hackney that’s turning round. I get in, watching Sean pull back the shed doors. I don’t think he’s realised I’m leaving and I think quite possibly that’s for the best.
‘Galway coach station, please. I’m catching the bus to Shannon airport.’ Then I sit back and close my eyes so I can’t see the town as I leave.