30
THEA
Five days. It’s been five days since Wesley confessed he didn’t want me to leave. Five days since he first kissed me and I didn’t know what I was missing until he did.
Two days ago, he took me on a proper date. I see his walls coming down, slowly. He was patient with me despite my frustration at throwing axes. When his friend came over to say hi, I saw something else. His smile didn’t reach his eyes, like he was putting on a mask.
It’s clear that his friendly and outgoing personality is a mask to hide his struggle with depression. That’s a secret he only shares with his brothers…well and now me. The feeling of wanting to protect him is getting stronger. Beyond his powerful, towering presence, there’s a wounded man who fears being left by those he loves. I want to make sure he never worries about that with me.
These are thoughts for another day.
Today, Cole’s driving me out to a special spot. He refuses to tell me much about it and I don’t mind giving him all the control. Covering for Cassie has been exhausting, so I need a break from thinking.
This morning I took the last of her clients. I have tomorrow off and she gets back in town that night. We’ll meet up Saturday to go over any important details. I’m determined to enjoy my downtime, especially since I get to spend it with Cole.
I wasn’t wrong in my initial concerns about splitting my time with four men. Technically, only three as of now, since Damian is keeping his distance—I can’t imagine how difficult it’ll be adding him into the mix. Juggling the three of them is exhausting and I’m starting to feel the guilt of not giving them enough attention—whether it’s valid or not.
“Don’t freak out, okay?” Cole says abruptly, dragging me from my thoughts. I’m confused. I follow his line of sight. A sign alongside the road announces Welcome to South Carolina.
We’ve been driving for a while, yet I hadn’t expected to cross state lines. “Where are we going, Cole?”
He smiles elusively.
“We’re going to North Carolina. I know,” he defends before I can say anything. “I should have told you, but I really wanted to surprise you. It’s amazing where you can get to in a couple of hours from Willow Hill.” Cole looks over at me nervously. Does he expect me to react negatively? I might be shocked, although in all honesty this is the kind of effort I’ve always longed for. I love that he’s taken the initiative to plan a surprise for us.
I lean over and give him a peck on the cheek. “I’ve never been to North or South Carolina,” I exclaim giddily. From the corner of my eye, I see the tension leave his shoulders and a satisfied smile replaces his worry.
Cole accelerates. The BMW shoots forward effortlessly. Wesley let us borrow his pretty red sports car for the trip after Cole promised him he would be extra careful with his baby.
The last time I was in it, Wesley was explaining the lyrics of the song that was playing. As promised, he sent it to me, as well as some other ones. He was right. It quieted the noise in my head.
Admittedly, they were songs I wouldn’t have sought out on my own—heavy, emotional, raw. And beautiful. Kind of like him and I.
Cole opts for something different. Deep, seductive beats pour through the speakers. Laying my head back, I enjoy the wind against my face and the feel of Cole’s hand on mine.
Thirty minutes later, we pull into a parking lot. “It’s a short walk.” He laces our fingers together. I don’t know how, but everything about this feels right. Not all guys are the same.When I tell myself this, I actually believe it this time.
“Here we are.” His eyes scan the horizon in wonder.
We’re on a wooden walkway with metal handrails. From where we stand, a complete view of a cascading waterfall is across from us. We are far away and high up enough to see from the very top of the fall to where it hits the rocks at its base, hundreds of feet down.
The white stream of water rushing over the gray rocks is the only interruption against the vast greenness. I immediately grab for my camera around my neck, then stop.
Instead, I give Cole my attention first. “This is amazing. It’s…It’s…” I’m at a loss for words, so I ask, “Why is this place special to you?”
Cole smiles warmly and stares out over the landscape, the green of his eyes matching the leaves. “I was on my way to Charlotte for culinary school and made a wrong turn. It was a while before I noticed. I started seeing signs for this place and figured I’d stop, have something to eat and stretch. Little did I know that this is what I’d find. In all honesty, I was second guessing my decision to go to school. My parents and my older siblings thought it would be a waste of money. They started getting in my head, but I stood here, looked out over the falls and it just clicked.”
“That’s beautiful, Cole.” I place my hand on his jaw—his beard tickles my fingers as I memorize the nostalgic look in his eyes.
“When I was conflicted about opening the bakery, I came back here. I…I also came here after our first date. This has kind of been the place where I’ve made my most important life decisions.”
My heart is hammering in my chest and for some insane reason, I hope this isn’t leading to him proposing or something.
Cole leans down and kisses me. “Thea, I wanted to bring you here to say…” Pulling away, he runs his hand through his curls and anxiety knots in my stomach. “I’m falling for you.” He must see the worry on my face. “And don’t feel pressured to say that you feel the same. I only wanted to tell you where I’m at. That I can see this lasting and my heart is all in.”
Calmness washes over me. Gazing up into those pretty eyes, I want to say it too, yet I feel overwhelmed. I want to be completely certain, so that I don’t hurt him. I guess I wasn’t sure how this part would go. There are so many moving parts to my relationship with these men—love isn’t really something I thought about much. I’ve known that my feelings for Cole were growing, but love…
Gavin was the last man I let myself love. And fuck, I really did love him, despite how he treated me. Look where that got me. The thought of letting Cole get that far into my heart terrifies me. I just need to think. I need to be sure.
“Thank you for trusting me with that.” I push up on my toes and kiss him for a long time, hoping that not saying the words back won’t change anything between us.
“Shit. I knew I should have stopped at that gas station.” The car sputters to a stop as he guides it to the side of the road. “I’m sorry. This is not how I wanted to end today.” Cole rests his head on the steering wheel.
We’re in the middle of nowhere and the sun is setting. I check my phone to find there’s no reception and my battery is at sixteen percent.
“I think I saw a sign back there for a restaurant or store. I wasn’t paying much attention,” he offers.
I take his hand and kiss it. “Let’s go on an adventure.” I hop out of the car and lace his fingers with mine as we walk in the direction of the sign he saw.
We find it about a half mile back from where we came. It reads The Evergreen Inn. “An inn?” I say hopefully. “Maybe someone can give us a ride to a gas station.” Cole smiles weakly.
We take the steps up to the cobbled brick and wood inn sitting atop a hill. There’s a large wrap-around porch with rocking chairs every few feet. Above, fans attached to the awning offer a cool breeze against the summer heat while the attached lights glow warmly, illuminating the porch as dusk settles over the sky.
Cole opens the door for me. “After you, love.”
Inside, the first thing I notice is the floor to ceiling fireplace. A massive deer’s head is mounted in the stone above the mantle—it’s horns casting long, pointy shadows across the walls. Rustic chandeliers dimly light the sitting area and front desk. The couches and armchairs around the hearth are empty. The only sign of life is the kindly older woman behind the front desk, grinning at us.
“Checking in?” She chirps.
“Oh, no,” I answer, a little disappointed that we aren’t. “Your inn is beautiful. We’ll have to book a stay another time.” I smile genuinely. “Our car ran out of gas about a half mile up the road. We were wondering if there is someone who can take us to the nearest gas station.”
She fidgets before responding. “Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem, but I’m the only one working this evening. It’s a rather slow night. I sent everyone else home.” She gives me a tight smile. “I’m so sorry.”
I glance at Cole. “Should we call your brothers?”
His head tilts back and forth as he considers. “It’s an hour and a half drive. I’d hate to drag them all the way out here. We wouldn’t get back until midnight or so. Do you want to stay the night?”
Of course I do. This place is gorgeous. I rest my hand on his arm and then look at the woman. “We’ll take a room.”
“Wonderful!” She excitedly begins typing into an older computer. “One bed or two,” she asks politely, not wanting to assume.
“One, ple—”
Cole interrupts. “Two is good.”
My face falls. The woman notices and I flush red. Did I do something wrong? He’s been quieter than usual on the trip back from the waterfall. The waterfall…Is he upset because I didn’t reciprocate his feelings?
The woman hands him the key and directs us where to go. I follow silently behind Cole as he leads the way. My thoughts clash up against one another—I don’t want to feel guilty for not saying that it back, but I still do.
I’m deep in my head when I run into his back as he stops in front of our room.
“Here we are,” he announces as he turns the key and opens the door.
Suddenly, I don’t want to go in.
COLE
“Get settled. I’m going to see if I can find us some dinner.” Thea’s sitting on the bed. She nods, looking a little sad.
I don’t want her to be. I really don’t. Asking for two beds was petty. Since we left North Carolina, I’ve been in my head. Today was supposed to go much differently and I’m disappointed.
Needing a few minutes alone, I close the door behind me and head down the hallway.
Thea bruised my ego, although I don’t believe she did it on purpose. She’s either is too scared to be vulnerable, or she doesn’t love me…yet. I’m not sure which one hurts more.
I’ve spent weeks showing her I can be her safe space. She can count on me for whatever she needs. I shake the doubt from my mind. Thea loves me. She’s just apprehensive. I’m sure of it. The way I catch her staring at me when she thinks I’m not looking, the way her body craves me, the album.
She needs to let go of her past. I’m not Gavin.
Normally, I’d have no problem taking things slow, but Damian is pushing me. He doesn’t care if we love each other—he wants us to fuck. That’s not what I want for my sweet Thea. I need this to be perfect and for us to feel the same way.
It doesn’t help that Wesley’s now pursuing her, respectfully, of course. It’s always easier when there’s fewer of us involved, however, it was that or risking Thea leaving. This is a lot to take on, and I’m sure her feelings are all over the place. I wish my ego would accept that.
I turn the corner to see the front desk woman, Deena, according to her name tag, staring at me curiously.
“Sorry to bother you. I hate to ask, but is there any chance you have some food in the kitchen I could take up with me? We haven’t had dinner.”
Deena smiles kindly. “I might have a thing or two. Come with me.” I follow her into the kitchen, watching as she opens the fridge. “Tonight we had lemon roasted chicken, wild rice, and asparagus. Would that be alright?”
“That should be good. I hate to be a pain. Do you know if there’s any gluten in this? She can’t eat it.” The older woman looks at me in confusion. “Anything with flour.”
Her eyes drift over the meal, probably recalling if she used flour in anything.
“No, I don’t believe so. Although, I didn’t cook it. This was made hours ago by our chef.” I hate not having a clear answer. I never want Thea to go without. However, tonight it might be unavoidable.
I smile graciously. “Thank you, we’ll take it.”
Deena plates the food and warms it in the microwave. Not exactly what I had in mind, but it’ll have to do.
I carry the stacked covered plates back to the room, but pull out my phone before I open the door. I roll my eyes at the messages in the group chat. Damian and Sutton sent urgent texts asking where we were and if everything was fine.
My brother is getting on my last nerve. Damian’s need to know and control everything is overwhelming. And not only with Thea—with our businesses as well. Pointing out my payroll mistake and hounding me about it is just like him. Always keeping an eagle eye on the money.
I mean, I get it. He didn’t come from a lot and now that he has money, he keeps a tight grip on it. Sure, we have a nice house and cars, although aside from that we live modestly. We don’t take lavish vacations or own a yacht. Those are unnecessary things, in Damian’s opinion. He hordes our wealth, fearing it can be taken at any time.
Typing out my reply, I hit send and turn off my phone before heading back into the room.