33
THEA
My feet carry me upstairs, although I feel like I’m floating. I don’t feel real.
I need my computer. My thoughts feel fragmented and detached. When I get to the dining room, I sit down in front of it and hit the power button.
“You clean up nice, blue eyes,” Wesley calls out from the kitchen. I hardly hear him. I pull up a sticky note on my desktop and start typing. “Hey, you alright?”
“Why’s she so pale?” I distantly hear Damian ask.
“Things apartment…storage facility…call mom…Cassie property…” I’m mumbling these incoherent things and hitting the keys, unsure if my notes are going to make sense when I go back and read them.
I’m not sure when they all get to me, but in my haze, I make out Sutton, Damian, Wesley, and Cole surrounding the table.
Cole is snapping his fingers in front of me—it barely registers. It isn’t until Damian’s hand pushes the computer closed that reality floats within reach. “I need that. I need to make a list.”
“Thea, what do you need a list for?” Sutton inquires, concern weighing down his voice.
Wesley grabs my chair, spinning me towards him. His hands are grabbing my shoulders and shaking me. “Thea, what is going on? What is it?” His voice is nearly frantic. I blink and I meet his brown eyes. They anchor me a little.
Clearing some of the fog, I pull my phone out of my pocket and open Kenneth’s message. I hand the phone to Wesley, who passes it to Damian, who gives it to Cole, who tosses it to Sutton. “My landlord found that shoved into the drain of my sink. The one that overflowed while I was at work.”
“What the fuck?” Damian mutters. “When I get my hands on him, he’s dead.”
“Woah, let’s think this through first. We don’t even know if it was him.” Sutton tries to reason with Damian.
Wesley scoffs. “Of course it’s him. Damian, you need to track him down. I’ll take care of the rest.”
I’m hardly listening as they go back and forth, trying to figure out how to find Gavin and what they want to do to him.
The list is still on repeat in my head so that I don’t forget. Things at apartment, storage, mom, property. “I need to do something. I-I have things I need to get done.”
I try to stand, however, Wesley’s too strong and isn’t letting up on my shoulders. “You need to take a minute. That’s what you need to do. Take a few breaths,” he insists.
“Wesley,” I say, my voice eerily calm. “I don’t need breath meditation right now. I need to get things in order.”
He straightens at my words. “Okay, then let me help. What do you need to get in order?”
I list my things that I’ve been repeating so that I won’t forget. “I have to get my things from my apartment.”
“Perfect. Cole, can you arrange that?”
He stares at me, determined. “Absolutely.”
“What’s next, blue eyes?”
“I need to call Cassie. I have to tell her to put a pause on the property we’re purchasing.” I can’t possibly afford to go forward, especially if I’m going to move back to Atlanta. I’ll have to figure out the studio as well. This might very well end our friendship and the thought is enough to make me feel something.
“We’ll handle that later. That’s not a priority. Tell me the next thing on your list.” Wesley’s completely relaxed as he walks me through this. This is a side to him I’m not used to seeing, although I’ve only just started getting to know him.
A fresh wave of emotions washes over me. Sadness. I’m going to have to leave these four amazing men behind. Wetness brims my eyes. I push it away and tell Wesley the next item.
“I need to get a storage facility for my furniture.” Some of the weight is lifting with each task being spoken.
Wesley looks at Sutton. “Do you still know the guy over at the storage place on Fifth and Magnolia?”
“No,” I interrupt. “It needs to be near Atlanta. I’ll need it close by.” The four of them glance at each other, confused. “My parents live there, so I’ll need my stuff nearby when I move in with them.”
“Abso-fucking-lutely not,” Damian spits out. “You’re not moving back in with those assholes. You’re not moving to Atlanta.”
He doesn’t have a choice in the matter, but I know Damian likes control, so I try to reason with him. “Damian, I can’t stay here. I don’t have enough money to move into a new place. Kenneth is keeping my security deposit. I can’t live with Cassie and Anthony again. I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You’ll live here. Don’t be absurd.” He gives me a look that tells me not to challenge him. Although today, that isn’t an option.
“Whoever put that note in my apartment—”
“Gavin,” Damian interjects.
“Most likely Gavin, yes. He’s getting more dangerous. He broke into my fucking apartment and flooded it. He’s left me more than one note and put his hands on me. I don’t know what else he’s capable of. He’s lost his damn mind. I don’t want him coming here. I can’t let him unleash his crazy on the four of you. If he did something…if he hurt any of you…” I can’t finish because that thought is too painful to imagine.
I’m spilling things that I never wanted to tell them. This baggage isn’t theirs to take on. But I don’t have a choice. I have to explain why I can’t stay here. Even still, I keep one piece of knowledge to myself. The text from Gavin. If this is their reaction to the note, I can’t imagine what they’d do if they knew he watched Cole and me during such an intimate moment.
Damian steps around the table—Wesley moves out of the way without being told. He leans down, a wave of auburn hair falling in front of his face. He’s so close that I can feel his breath on my lips. Any other time, I’d be thinking about kissing him. Right now, I need to keep him safe.
“Princess, I don’t think you understand. Let the prick try to hurt us. Let him try to lay another hand on you and I’ll make good on the promise I made last time I saw him.” Curiosity tugs at my tongue.
“What promise?” I knew he said something to make Gavin run away in fear the night of the carnival. Considering that he isn’t staying away, he’s either lost his mind, or it wasn’t as much of a threat as I’d assumed.
A devious smirk pulls at the corner of his mouth. “I told him he’s messing with one of our pack now. And if he finds himself arrogant enough to come up against us, he’ll find our teeth at his throat and we won’t let up until we feel his blood stop pumping through his veins.” His words send an icy chill down my back. “You’re ours now and that means we’ll lay down our lives fighting any threat you might come up against. That’s a non-negotiable. Understand?”
I don’t think anything other than “yes” will satisfy him. So that’s what I tell him. Although I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t absolutely terrified of Damian in that moment, possibly terrified of them all.
This is why I’m keeping the text to myself. Not to protect Gavin, but to protect them. I had a feeling that they might resort to violence and now I know for sure. I won’t let them do anything stupid because of my past. That’s my cross to bear.
DAMIAN
I contained most of my anger in front of Thea. It took everything in me to not walk out of the house and track Gavin down immediately. No one touches the people I… I stop the thought before it crosses into forbidden territory.
My glove connects with the punching bag. I’m picturing his face. I felt his nose crunch under my fist once before, so it isn’t hard to imagine. The only thing missing is the spray of warm blood that lets me know that I’ve made a point.
Apparently, my point wasn’t clear enough. He must think I’m exaggerating about taking his life. If only he knew, his wouldn’t be the first I’ve taken and it probably won’t be the last. But these things have to be done with care.
Sweat drips down my forehead. I wipe it away with my arm.
The fact that he’s been seen around Willow Hill and Thea’s parents sent him here, I don’t want police showing up at my door snooping around if he goes M.I.A. I have something else I’m sitting on, another threat that may seem scarier to him than death. The assault case that was swept under the rug.
After my workout, I’ll be printing out the pictures of that girl’s bruises and of the judge with his father. I can ruin him. That may be enough to get him to back off. If not, I have no problem taking his last breath. In fact, I’ll probably enjoy it.
Thea doesn’t know how far we’ll go to keep her safe. I’ve told her so much today, however, hearing it and seeing it are two different things.
Everything I need to take care of is stacking up, making my life more difficult and stealing hours away from what I’d like to be focusing on. Like Thea. Wrangling my brothers, managing the businesses, dealing with my client, and now Gavin…none of those things brings me any joy. But she could and I’m forced to forego her so that our lives stay intact.
Sometimes I really hate being the one everyone relies on. Sometimes I hate my need to control everything.
I lay another round of punches into the bag. An unexpected thought pops into my head as I land the last one. None of us have ever felt this strongly about a woman so soon. Certainly not all at once. We’ve only known Thea a little over a month, yet this spell she has on us is…powerful.
“Thought I heard someone in here.”
Turning, I see Thea leaning against the door to the gym. She looks much better now. Cole fed her and we’ve taken care of her worries. The color’s returned to her skin and her eyes aren’t distant. Either way, she is fucking smoking, although right now… Jesus, I can’t take it.
Thea’s hip is popped out as her head rests on the door frame. Her dark waves spill over her tits. She’s put some glossy shit on her lips that makes it hard not to stare. All I can think about is watching that mouth slide over my cock as I face fuck her.
Wiping my brow, I tell her, “Yeah, I needed to get a quick workout in.”
Pushing off the door, she walks closer. She must be feeling better. The way she’s moving her hips as she’s walking isn’t on accident. That little smirk on her mouth confirms it.
“I wanted to thank you for everything. I know you said taking care of me makes you happy, but I want you to know that I’m grateful.” She stops a few feet from me. “Not just for the financial stuff or letting me live here.” My eyes narrow. “Thank you for protecting me. No one ever has, not like that.”
“Thea—”
She puts a finger up to stop me and takes a step closer, within reach now. My hands are gloved. If they weren’t, I’m not sure I could stop myself.
“Thank you for seeing me. And I know that sounds vague, but you do. You see who I am and what I need to feel safe. You make me feel safe. Not your money or your home. You.”
Fuck, she’s killing me. No one ever talks to me like this. I don’t know what to say.
Thea takes another step closer. Our chests are almost touching. My hands clench inside of my gloves. Looking up at me, she studies me with those pretty eyes. She reaches out. Fuck if it doesn’t make my heart speed up. What is she doing to me?
Her fingers cautiously skim across my jaw. Watching her lips part as she touches me like this for the first time makes my cock spring to life. It’s such an innocent thing she’s doing, but I can’t help getting turned on by it. Probably because I know she’s not innocent. She knows exactly what she’s doing. Thea’s a goddamn temptress, a siren and I’m a willing victim to her song.
“I know what you need to feel safe too,” she whispers. “I can give you that.”
I cock my head. A million meanings to her words fly through my mind. Her hand falls away, although not before grazing down my torso. “And what do you think I need?” I challenge. She must think I only want sex by the way she’s standing so close and touching me. I mean…I do, however, that’s not all I want.
Her stare drops. “I don’t fully understand why, but I know you need to be in control to feel safe.” The words startle me. That’s not what I was expecting. “You need me to trust in you. You need me to need you.” The words pummel me, yet she doesn’t stop. “I need you, Damian.” Her gaze lifts to mine as she says it. Her thick inky lashes darkening her deep blue eyes. “It’ll be hard for me, at first. I’m not used to it. But I can do that for you.”
I look away. “I don’t know what you’re playing at, but it isn’t cute.”
Thea’s face twists in anger. “I’m not playing at anything. I’m making an effort, for you, like you’ve done for me.”
I don’t believe her. Even if I wanted to, it’s a dangerous path that only has one outcome. It’s one I’ve forced myself to block out. I hate the warring of emotions inside of me. This is what I want from her—she’s nailed it. I should be happy. Still, the doubt is stronger, making me bite back at her. The doubt that she genuinely means it. The doubt that I’m worthy if she does. And the doubt that she’ll accept me for who I really am.
Thea sees what I show her. She sees that I crave control and providing for my family brings me happiness. But those are surface level things. If she knew me, who I truly am and what I’ve done, she wouldn’t care about me. She wouldn’t want to need me. Thea would probably run.
That’s always been my fear, though. Even with my brothers. That they’d see I’m not worth the trouble, despite everything I provide. That’s why I give them everything, isn’t it? So that I’m valuable in some way and they won’t leave.
Pushing out a harsh breath, I shake my head. “Princess, don’t worry about me. Focus on my brothers.”
She crosses her arms. Now we’re touching and I can’t stand it. That stubborn, bratty look on her face mixed with the hurt in her eyes is going to be my undoing. Thea bites her lip, probably holding back some kind of insult.
I watch as the expression on her face flattens into nothingness. “Fine. If that’s what you want.”
She turns and walks back towards the door. I don’t miss the slight glance back she gives me or her plump ass taunting me. My dick pushes against my pants. Nothing a shower and my hand can’t take care, I tell myself unconvincingly.