CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER TEN
Because the next thing out of my mouth was, “I’m just telling you the truth. Why would I regret that? Isn’t it a good thing to tell the truth?”
“It is.” He seemed surprised by what I’d said. “I think we should all tell the truth.”
“Right.” I nodded, encouraged. “Like how you said you almost ruined your whole life because of a lie. That’s bad. What happened?”
“Do you think you’ll remember any of this tomorrow?” he asked, and I didn’t know if he wanted reassurance that he could speak to me without fear of me recalling it or if he wanted to make sure that I would.
“Possibly. Guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”
“When I was twenty years old, I was training for the Olympics, like I mentioned. I had a coach who had been involved in a scandal a few years before and was in danger of being banned from the sport. He put all his hopes on me. We trained and trained, more than what was even necessary. At a half marathon, I twisted my knee and we went to a doctor. The doctor advised that I stop running for at least six months to allow my knee to heal, but the Boston Marathon was only a month away. And that’s a qualifier for long-distance runners for the US team.” He let out a big sigh. “My coach lied to me. Told me it was fine and that I’d get better if I just kept running and pushing myself. It made everything worse and I permanently injured my knee and ended my running career. If he’d just told me the truth, let me decide what I wanted to do ...” His voice trailed off. “He took that choice from me and ruined my prospects. I don’t like being lied to.”
“That sucks. I’m sorry.” That was a little hard to hear, being a big massive lying liar myself who lied to everyone all the time about everything in my fake life. How sincere could my apology be when I was currently lying to him? To be fair to me, I wasn’t going to wreck his life or anything, but dang, Camden was going to hate me when he found out.
Whether it was to distract him or me, I wasn’t sure, but I went for one of my patented changes of the subject. “In addition to smelling good, I think you should know that, objectively, you are hot.”
That made him raise both eyebrows in amusement. “Am I?”
“Mm-hmm. Krista said that if she had to repopulate the planet, she’d choose you to do it. That’s like, a really big compliment to your genes.”
“Does that mean you think I’m hot?” He could have asked the question seductively, but instead it was very matter of fact. It was like he’d decided I was off limits and more like his buddy than a potential love interest and I was finding it all highly aggravating.
“You know you’re good-looking.” As if that were somehow in question.
“Seriously, you are going to be furious with me tomorrow. Maybe you should drink some water and then we can play the quiet game.” He handed me the water bottle and while I knew it was in my best interests to drink it, I didn’t feel like it.
Nor did I want to play a game where I had to stay quiet. I had so many things to say to him. “You win the quiet game! You know, I think my inhibitions are very lowered.”
“I know. And you’re not really a lowering-my-inhibitions-is-a-good-thing kind of girl.”
“I can have fun,” I insisted.
“That wasn’t what I meant. I have fun with you already. I just know how I’d feel if I were in your shoes saying things that maybe I didn’t want to actually admit out loud.”
“Everything I’m saying I want to say.” That was right, wasn’t it? “Do you know what the problem is with me? It’s a riddle. I’ll give you a hint. It starts with a D and ends with aiquiri.”
“Despite how intricate and complicated your riddle is, I think I solved it. Would you please drink water?”
“Okay, fine,” I said, dragging out the vowels in my words, like an ornery teenager. “But only because you asked so nicely.”
He reached over to open the bottle for me, which was considerate because I wasn’t sure I could have managed it. My coordination seemed to be a tad bit ... off. I had thought I wasn’t thirsty, but as soon as the water touched my lips, it was like I couldn’t get enough. I drank half the bottle in one go.
We pulled up to the hotel and Camden paid the driver and said, “Stay put. I’ll come help you.” He got out, then shut his door. I saw him jogging around to my side and I let out a noise of disgust.
I didn’t need his help. I was a grown woman more than capable of getting out of a taxi all by myself. I opened the handle and swung open the door. I went to climb out of the cab and I sprawled forward, falling down on my hands and knees. My purse went flying, emptying its contents on the ground.
Camden was right next to me, helping me back to my feet. “I thought I told you to wait.”
“I was managing fine.”
“Yes, I noticed while you were getting O positive all over the pavement,” he said, leading me over to a bench near the hotel’s entrance. “Please sit here for a second.”
Since my head was still spinning, I sat. He went over to my purse and started gathering things up. I said a quick prayer of gratitude that I did not have any feminine products in my bag. I had the sneaking suspicion that I might not have been able to look him in the eye again if I had a mental image of him picking up my tampons.
“That thing in your hand is called a phone,” I told him when he got my cell phone and put it back in my purse. “You might not recognize it since it’s from this century.”
He ignored my jibe and grabbed my presents. I hoped my salt and pepper shakers were okay. They were still wrapped in tissue paper, so I figured they had probably survived.
“I think your mints spilled everywhere,” he said. “Wait, these aren’t mints. What is this?”
“That’s my happy box,” I told him as he started gathering little rolled-up pieces of paper. He unrolled one and I didn’t even object.
“‘Nice job.’” He opened another. “‘Great work.’ ‘You should be proud of yourself.’” He looked up at me. “I don’t get it.”
Camden put the pieces of paper back into the mint box I kept them in and brought the box and my purse back to me.
“My mom is very demanding,” I told him as I returned the box to my bag. “I know she loves me, but I’m an only child. A child my parents never thought they would have. So it’s like they have all their hopes pinned on me.”
“The grandkids thing?”
“That’s part of it, but I’ve always felt like I had to be the best. The smartest. The most successful. And sometimes my mom is critical. I know she’s trying to help me, but it can be overwhelming and I can get mired in self-doubt. So when someone leaves me a nice note—a teacher, a friend, a client—I tear it off and keep it in my box. They’re reminders that somebody appreciated me and thought I was doing a good job. That I don’t always fall short.”
He seemed to be considering my words, and I saw a flash of sadness on his face. “That’s pretty deep for someone who’s had enough rum to make Captain Jack Sparrow woozy.”
“You’re right.” The night was far too beautiful and warm to be wasting my time talking about things that depressed me. “I’m going to go for a walk on the beach. Do you want to come?”
“We should go inside and clean your hands.”
I looked at my palms. “It’s fine. It’s not bad.” I flicked a tiny black pebble away. “It doesn’t even hurt.” My head seemed a little clearer, so I stood up and only wobbled a little.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said.
Shaking my head, I told him, “I wasn’t asking for your permission.”
He stood up, too. “I’ll come with you.”
Secretly, I was thrilled. This was exactly what I’d hoped he’d do. But I didn’t want him to think that I was trying to manipulate him. Even if I was. “You don’t have to.”
He ran his fingers through his hair in a very attractive way. Some part of my brain registered that the gesture and the loud sigh that accompanied it were probably due to frustration.
“Why are you sighing?” I asked.
“Because I’m having visions of you getting dragged out to sea and then Sadie blaming me for losing her best friend to the watery deep. So obviously I have to accompany you.” His tone was light, but I could tell that something else was bothering him.
I guessed he would tell me when he wanted to.
“This way!” I said, walking across the grass to where it met the white sand. My heels immediately sank and I was having problems navigating the beach.
Camden came up behind me. “Why did you stop?”
I flailed my hands around, ending up pointing at my shoes. “I can’t walk with these things on and I’m pretty sure that if I try to take them off I’m going to end up with a head injury.”
“Sand’s pretty soft. I think you’ll be okay,” he teased, but then he knelt down next to my feet.
His fingers made contact with the bare skin of my right ankle as he undid the strap and then carefully slid my shoe off, holding me in place with his warm, strong hand. I put my palms on his shoulders, just to keep myself steady. Not so much because of the shoe coming off, but because of the waves of sensation that traveled from my foot up my leg and settled deep and low in my gut.
I tried for humor. “Why are you keeping a ham under your shirt where your shoulder’s supposed to go?”
He either didn’t get it or didn’t think I was funny. The second one felt like the most realistic reason, and he was probably right to ignore me. I’d also said it in an attempt to deflect the feeling of his skin on mine, and it wasn’t working. Like, I was headed into eyes-rolling-into-the-back-of-my-head-from-pleasure territory.
Camden took off the shoe on my left foot in the same way, intensifying all the feelings, and I kind of wanted to tackle him into the sand and have my way with him.
But then a part of my brain that wasn’t drunk from rum and/or high off his touch recognized that he wasn’t into it. He didn’t brush his fingers against my skin like he could have, or linger a moment too long holding me in place, or run his hand along the back of my knee, or a million other things to show his interest that I would have eagerly welcomed.
No, instead he was all business and respectful.
“Here.” He handed me my shoes and took off his own loafers so that we could walk along the shore together.
It was like something from a postcard; a full moon hung above us, reflected on the water. A cool breeze chased away the heat and humidity left over from the day, and a salty smell surrounded us. The sparkling sand felt warm and soft under my toes. The palm trees that marked the line between the beach and the hotel’s grass made a soft hushing sound as we walked by.
Beautiful.
“Tell me something about you I don’t know,” I told him.
He shuffled his feet for a second and I realized that he was trying to match my gait, slowing down his longer stride to stay with me. He stayed silent for a moment and I thought he might not answer. But then he said, “I don’t just work at a tech company. I’m the CEO. Dan and I started it together in college and it’s about to revolutionize the entire world.”
It took me a second to realize that he was watching me closely, waiting to see what I would think. Maybe waiting for a specific reaction? I made a buzzer sound, like on a game show. “Thank you for playing, we have some nice parting gifts for you.” At his raised eyebrows I added, “I already knew that about you. You were supposed to tell me something I didn’t know.”
“Sadie told you?”
“Well, I am her maid of honor,” I reminded him.
“Yeah, and this whole wedding is just a big distraction from next week, when the company goes ...” He let his voice trail off and I found it more than a tad enjoyable that I wasn’t the only one who wanted to say things I shouldn’t.
I decided to mess with him. “When the company goes public?”
“How do you know that?”
“Didn’t we just establish that I’m Sadie’s maid of honor? My guess is Dan told her and then she told me.”
He looked upset. “Did you tell anyone?”
“Obviously I have all the local New York news stations on standby, waiting to get more information from me.” Camden came to a complete stop. I reached back to tug on his arm, to get him to keep walking. “It’s a joke. No, I didn’t tell anyone, Mr.Paranoid.”
“If this leaks out beforehand ... there’s so many things that could make this all go sideways.”
“I’d never do anything that would hurt Sadie,” I told him, and that was true. I’d also have a harder time than I would have yesterday doing something that would hurt him, but as I began to sober up I realized that some things were better left unsaid. “I don’t know why you think bad things about me, but I’m actually trustworthy. I won’t tell anyone.” Other than Krista, but that shouldn’t count. She was under the same banner of secrecy.
“I believe you,” he said, and I wondered if it was real. Or if he was trying to placate me and win my trust. Even wasted, that suspicious part of me wasn’t willing to just enjoy the moment. I had to question everything.
Including why he hadn’t done exactly what I’d asked. “By the way, you still haven’t told me something I don’t know about you.”
“A secret?” he asked. “I bet you have a lot of secrets.”
As someone who made a living at turning around conversations so that I wouldn’t be caught out, I was impressed by how quickly he shifted things back to me.
“A lady should, don’t you think? How else are we supposed to maintain an air of mystery?”
He gave me a rueful smile and we kept walking in silence. The beach on this side of the hotel wasn’t very long; it came to an abrupt stop at a large rock outcropping. We would have had to climb up to keep walking along the sand and I was obviously in no condition to do that.
“We should head back,” he said and I was disappointed. Maybe he hadn’t told me something I didn’t know already, but I liked talking to him and I really liked that he had at least shared something with me. It wasn’t exactly personal, just his real job, but it was something.
It made me feel like I should return the favor. “Do you want to know a secret about me?”