Epilogue
Emory
Anna pins the last piece of my veil into place and steps back to look at me. She hasn't said a word in the last ten minutes, which is unusual for a woman who has an opinion about everything.
Lex sits on the floor beside her feet, chewing on the satin ribbon that was supposed to be tied around the ring pillow, and Anna reaches down and gently takes it from his mouth without breaking eye contact with me.
"You remind me of myself the day I married Rashid's father." She smooths the front of my veil and adjusts it over my shoulders. "I was terrified and stubborn. I refused to let anyone help me. You have that same dumbfounded look on your face right now."
"I'm not terrified," I tell her.
"You're shaking, Emory." When she laughs it's tight and cold, but I smile at her. She's trying as hard as she can not to be the bitter old biddy who criticizes everyone.
I look down at my hands and wring them together. The manicure is nice, but it's not me. And the spot where my engagement ring has perched for the past several months is empty, waiting on the wedding ring to take its place.
"I want to tell you something before we go out there," she says, and she sounds more maternal than I've ever heard her.
"When my son brought you into his house I thought you were a problem he'd created for himself.
I thought you were temporary, that he'd tire of you and send you away and I'd go back to my quiet life. "
She pauses and looks down at Lex, who's found a new ribbon to chew on. She takes that one from him too, and hands him a stuffed bear from the chair instead.
"I was wrong," she says, turning back to me.
"You changed my son in ways that I spent thirty years trying to do and couldn't. He is softer with you than he's ever been with anyone, and he's a better father than his own father was, which is something I never thought I'd say about him.
" She squeezes my hands. "You are the best thing that's ever happened to this family, and I am proud to call you my daughter. "
My eyes well up and I blink hard to keep the tears from ruining what Marta spent an hour putting on my face.
Anna reaches up and brushes away the one tear that escapes with her bony fingers, as gently as I think she's ever touched anyone.
"Don't you dare cry," she says. "You can cry later. Right now you walk out there and you marry my son, and you make that boy out there the happiest man in St. Petersburg."
"He doesn't do happy," I tell her, smirking as I use my pinky to dab at the moisture on my eye. Rashid is a stern, cold man, only breaking that demeanor when he is in the bedroom with me.
"He does now," she says, and she lets go of my hands and picks Lex up off the floor. The boy grabs a fistful of her dress and settles against her shoulder, still holding the bear. She adjusts the ring pillow under her free arm and looks at me one more time. "Are you ready?"
"I'm ready."
Anna walks out first, carrying Lex down the aisle toward the altar where Rashid stands waiting with Devid beside him.
The room is full of faces I don't recognize, families that Rashid does business with, allies and associates who came to pay their respects to a union that means as much politically as it does personally.
Rashid explained it to me in detail, though I got bored of it and distracted him by kissing.
But the faces blur when I step into the doorway and the only thing I see clearly is Rashid at the end of the aisle, in a dark suit with his hands clasped in front of him.
He looks at me fondly, though there's no other hint of emotion.
But his jaw does tighten slightly, and he stands a little straighter. He doesn't have to say how much this means to him.
I can see it in how he proudly puffs his chest out as everyone stands and turns to face me.
Batya offers an arm, which I take, and he pats my hand softly. He's still sick as a dog, and walking slower due to a limp.
But despite his short time on earth with us that remains, I'm glad I'm able to have this moment with him. I feared for a while that it might never happen.
"Don't let me fall, Batya," I tell him.
"I should be saying that to you," he says, patting my hand again. "My legs aren't what they used to be."
"Your legs are fine. Just keep walking."
"I'm walking, I'm walking." He takes another step and steadies himself. "Your mother would have loved this, Emory. She would've been sitting in the front row crying before you even made it to the altar."
"She'd have been crying since yesterday," I tell him, which makes him chuckle, and me smile.
We walk together down the aisle to camera flashes and eyes staring at me, but the only eyes I care about are at the end of it. Rashid watches us approach with stoic grace and a stern expression.
Halfway down the aisle Lex spots us from Anna's lap and reaches toward me with both arms, cooing loudly over the music.
Anna pulls him back gently and whispers something against his ear and he settles, but his eyes follow me the rest of the way down.
I blow him a kiss as we pass that makes him grin and smack his face, mimicking me before I turn back toward the front.
When we reach the altar Batya stops and turns to face me. He takes both of my hands and holds them, looking at me with the same expression he had in the hospital when I showed him the ring. He's happy for me, even if he doesn't understand it.
"Be happy, Em," he mutters, fighting back tears. "That's all your mother and I ever wanted for you. Just be happy."
He kisses my forehead and then turns to Rashid and places my hand in his.
Rashid takes it and nods at my father, a gesture so small that most people in the room probably miss it, but Batya sees it.
He steps back and lowers himself carefully into the chair beside Anna, who reaches over and pats his arm without looking away from the altar.
The hatred between them has simmered too, though Anna still despises Batya's feisty personality. And he still provokes her on purpose.
Part of me wonders if they don't have a spark of chemistry too. It'd be sad to watch her fall in love, only to lose him just like she lost her first husband.
The ceremony moves through its rhythms, and the words wash over me because all of my attention is on the man in front of me.
He says his vows, looking directly into my eyes.
When it's my turn to say mine, I'm afraid my voice trembles so badly no one can understand me.
Anna stands during the ring exchange and carries Lex forward on her hip. My boy holds the pillow out toward Rashid, though he's more interested in the bear tucked under Anna's arm than in the two gold bands tied on the satin.
Rashid takes the rings and Lex immediately takes the bear and throws it.
A quiet ripple of laughter rides over the room as Anna carries our boy back to her seat.
When it's finally over, and the priest announces us husband and wife, I finally see emotion light up my husband’s face.
We went from being perfect strangers, to him controlling me, to this. I love this man and all his bossy and angry ways.
He's my strength and my fortress, and the one I want to come home to every day.
"You may now kiss the bride," the priest announces, giving Rashid a nod.
He cups the back of my neck the way he did the first time he kissed me in that nightclub love shack, and pulls my mouth to his. The room erupts in applause, but I barely hear it because I'm kissing my husband for the first time. Nothing else in this room even registers to me anymore.
When we break apart, Lex shrieks from Anna's lap and throws the stuffed bear onto the floor again in a classic game of pickup.
"That boy has your aim," Rashid says, grinning.
"That boy has your temper," I tell him, elbowing his ribs.
I hold my husband's hand and look out at this strange, broken, beautiful family that I didn't choose, and couldn't have imagined, and wouldn't trade for anything.
My father is alive.
My son is safe.
And the man beside me, who took me against my will and held me until I stopped fighting, then asked me to stay, is holding my hand like he's never going to let go.
And I don't want him to.
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