Chapter 6 - Kayla #2
“I’m making roast duck with sweet orange glaze,” she informs us. “Oh, and Roger insisted on making an assortment of mini pizzas for the girls. He said they wouldn’t be too keen on the duck?”
“They might try it, but you never know with them at this age. They tend to either dramatically love things or dramatically hate them,” I laugh.
“I bet they’ll love my cooking. I made shepherd's pie the other night for Isaak. He ate the entire bowl clean. It’s a pity you guys couldn’t taste it. It was amazing!”
Behind her, Isaak is pulling the oddest face.
“We’re excited to try the duck,” Josiah says, chuckling.
Alara ushers us all into the living room to get comfortable on the sofas while the food is still cooking. Roger sounds very busy in the kitchen, and I wonder what he’s up to if Alara has already done it all.
The girls have discovered a treasure trove of toys in a basket near the corner sofa.
“Mama, can we play with these?” Kira asks, dragging the basket out.
Alara jumps up happily. “Of course you can,” she declares, sitting on the floor and tipping the whole basket over in front of herself.
“Are there other children who visit?” I ask, wondering if maybe Isaak or Alara have kids.
“No, um, these are all new…I thought…I wanted to…” Alara stumbles over her words, then gives up and shrugs, and gets involved with the twins as they search through everything in excitement.
I smile warmly at her. “Thank you."
While we chat, Alara laughs with the twins. She’s having a blast, and so are the girls.
It’s quite special to watch them together.
It strikes a chord deep inside me, because it’s something I haven’t fully considered right until this moment.
I’ve often thought about the twins not having a father, and I’ve worried about how that would affect them.
But I never considered what it was like for them to have no family at all.
I think it’s because I didn’t have family, and I never thought it was a big deal.
But now, seeing them playing with their aunt, even though they have no idea who she is to them…
my heart is flooded with warmth for them.
For the first time, I'm seeing what it might be like for them to have a full support system that doesn’t just involve me.
“Miss Alara, I believe your duck is ready, if you would like to come and confirm?” Roger says politely, standing in the doorway of the living room.
“Oh, of course, I almost forgot about it!” She jumps up, and the girls jump up with her.
“Can we help?” Kira asks.
“I’d love that!” Alara says excitedly. “I need some professional taste testers before we start serving dinner, do you think you’re up for it?” she says as the girls follow her through to the kitchen.
“I can taste stuff,” I hear Kira agreeing.
Josiah is grinning, watching the scene as closely as I am.
“She’s good with them,” he says thoughtfully.
“She’s a natural,” I agree.
“Alara has always had the biggest heart, but I think with them…it’s extra special for her. She was so excited to meet them,” Isaak says. He glances at me. “So was I. They are truly special young ladies, Kayla. You have done an incredible job as their mom,” he says, smiling.
My heart swells with pride and warmth.
Josiah is smiling proudly, too. I know this means the world to him, to have his family meet his daughters. For the first time, I actually feel guilty that I didn’t want the girls to know the truth yet.
It’s something I’m horribly nervous about, but he’s right when he says we have to tell them at some point.
I’m just not ready yet.
Josiah was the first person I ever truly allowed myself to rely on, and look where that got me.
Before him, I didn’t have family. No brothers or sisters or parents.
I spent the first few years of my life in an orphanage after I was found on their doorstep.
All that was left with me, and all I will ever know about my real family, was a single note.
It wasn’t deep or emotional. It simply said; I don’t know who the father is, and I cannot do this alone. Nothing more.
I was fostered by an older couple, and eventually they adopted me.
They paid for my education and took care of me financially, but we weren’t close.
It was somewhat of a military household with strict rules that I obeyed without question.
There wasn’t warmth or love, not the kind of love that children need.
Affection. Still, I am incredibly grateful for what they did for me.
I always will be. I know a lot of children who left the orphanage went into terrible situations that left them traumatized and scarred for life.
The older couple passed away before I graduated from college, and after that, I was truly and completely alone. And that was close to the time I met Josiah.
Glancing at him now, my heart feels heavy with the pain of what I thought we had.
He taught me a lesson, though. He taught me that the world really is as cruel as it seems, and the only person we can really rely on is ourselves.
Because of my experiences, I made the choice, from the moment I discovered I was pregnant, to do everything in my power to make sure my children had a very different life.
They will never question or doubt that they are loved unconditionally.
They will have everything their hearts desire.
They will learn to be strong, but also that they can come to me for anything.
And I will protect them with everything I have. Everything.
“The professional taste testers have given me ten gold stars!” Alara says, waltzing into the living room. “And you can all please come and sit at the dinner table.”
“One hundred and infinity stars!” Kira sings as she follows in behind Alara.
“Infinity isn’t a number,” Kelsey informs her. “One million stars."
“Infinity is a very special number, actually…” I say thoughtfully. “It’s all the numbers in the entire world and more. Never-ending numbers. Do you remember when we tried to count the stars, and they never ended? There were more and more and more of them?”
“Yes?” Kelsey scrunches her nose.
“Well, that is sort of like infinity.”
“So, infinity isn’t more than a million,” she says confidently.
“It is,” I nod. “It’s a million and another million and another million,” I laugh.
“Oh, then infinity gold stars,” Kelsey declares.
“I told you!” Kira chirps.
“Oh, I forgot the mint,” Alara says. But she is holding the carving knife and getting ready to cut the duck for us.
“I’ll get it,” I tell her, turning towards the kitchen.
“Thank you!” she calls after me.
As I walk into the kitchen, Roger jumps up, startled and looking horribly guilty.
He spins to face me, then holds his hand over his heart and breathes a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank goodness,” he mutters.
“What’s going on?” I ask, confused.
“I thought it was Alara,” he whispers.
“Okay?” I say cautiously.
He steps aside and quietly shows me what he was trying to hide.
An entire duck, on an identical oven dish, that he is busy throwing away!
“What are you doing?” I hiss in horror at the utter waste of food.
“I had to. Didn’t Mr. Belov warn you?”
“No?” I whisper, not knowing why we are whispering.
“Taste,” he says, breaking off a small piece and offering it to me.
I take it from him and pop it into my mouth. Instantly, I'm gagging and spitting it back into my hand. “It tastes like dish soap,” I say, trying to wipe the flavor off my tongue.
“I made a secret roast duck in the scullery. But Miss Alara can’t know.”
Suddenly, I understand everything, and can’t stop giggling.
Roger starts laughing too, shaking his head at how ridiculous it all is.
“That is so bad!” I whisper, laughing some more.
He nods. “It’s so very bad!”
When I walk through to the dining room carrying a silver jug of mint sauce, Alara looks up and notices the grin still spread over my face.
“What has you so happy?” she asks, smiling.
“Roger thinks he might be out of a job. He’s worried the family isn’t going to need him anymore,” I smirk.
Isaak can barely keep himself together, and Josiah quickly blurts out, “I got a taste of Alara’s duck before all of you, when I snuck in there to check on it while Roger was busy tidying up. It was…special.”
“I think we should get her a cooking course as a gift. If she’s this good now, imagine what she’ll do after a few lessons!” I suggest. “Everyone should follow their passions and try to grow them.”
“Now that is a brilliant idea,” Isaak says, looking so horribly relieved that it’s making me want to burst out laughing. “I definitely think Alara should take a cooking course. What a great idea!”
“Really? You think I’m good enough that it would be worth taking a class?” Alara asks, beaming.
“Absolutely!” Isaak nods, smiling from ear to ear.
Dinner is amazing. The duck Roger made was amazing.
And I strangely feel very at home and comfortable around his brother and sister, who have been more welcoming than I ever could have expected.
After dinner, I help Alara carry the plates through to the kitchen. Josiah scolds us both and says we have cleaners for that, but Alara scoffs and dismisses him with a wave of her hand. “Not everything needs to be done for us,” she scolds him in return.
Alara is busy putting away the leftovers when I wander out of the kitchen to find the twins.
Walking towards the living room, I pause, hearing my name being whispered. I stand closer to the wall to listen.
Josiah is speaking to Isaak in hushed tones.
“I can’t believe you kept this from us,” Isaak complains.
“I didn’t. I only found out about them recently.
A week ago. I had no idea before that!” Josiah insists.
“I feel like I’ve missed out on a world of wonder that I can never get back.
It must have been incredible watching them grow up.
They are such beautiful little girls. So full of character.
And even though they’re twins, it’s absolutely amazing how different they are.
You know, Kelsey and I are very similar.
She has a quiet way about her that I understand.
And Kira. Well, that little monster is just a raging ball of sunshine,” he laughs.
I listen quietly with a smile on my face and my heart softening.
It’s becoming increasingly difficult to stay angry with him, the same way it was almost impossible to keep my defensive walls up tonight after meeting his brother and sister again.
It's clear they had nothing to do with Josiah breaking up with me. Their warmth and kindness are too genuine.
Walking away from their conversation, I find the twins in the living room playing with the basket of toys.
They deserve to have a father. They deserve a whole family of people who care about them.
I need to give him a chance. At least for them.
Not another chance with my heart. That will never happen.
He might deserve a chance to be their father, though.
It’s getting late.
The twins are starting to yawn. I nudge Josiah. “They need to get to bed,” I whisper.
He nods. As he stands up, though, his phone rings.
“Sorry, I’ll just be a minute,” he tells me.
He walks a bit away from us and answers the call. His voice immediately becomes stiff and aggressive. He keeps his words quiet, and I can’t make out what he’s saying, but he sounds angry.
The call ends. Isaak is standing now, too, watching him.
“What is it?” his brother asks.
“We need to go to the warehouse,” he snaps.
“Alright, let me grab my phone,” Isaak says.
Josiah turns to me. “I’m sorry, we won’t be long, but I have to deal with this right now.”
“We can catch a cab home,” I say stiffly, wondering what could be so important at this time of night. The company is closed. It’s Saturday.
“No, it’s okay, they can stay with me.”
I turn to frown at Alara. “The twins need to get to bed.”
“We can set them up in my spare room. They can sleep until the guys get back,” she assures me.
I sigh, not understanding any of it. Then I shrug and give in. “Alright, but please don’t be long. There will be hell to pay tomorrow if they don’t get enough sleep,” I mutter.
The whole atmosphere in the house has shifted. Everyone seems tense. The three of them are exchanging secretive looks as Alara waits at the front door to lock up behind them.
My body is tense. My instincts are screaming at me that something is very off about all of this.
They are keeping something from me, and I don’t like it at all.