Chapter 28
TWENTY-EIGHT
KARI
I stared at the fresh ink staining his angry skin. A purple orchid was weaved through the top of the vine that anchored the side-long tattoo.
I covered my mouth with my hand, unsure of what to say. I finally dragged my eyes from the design and to his eyes. He was watching me, as unsure as I was.
“It’s so beautiful, Max. I just want to touch it.”
He chuckled softly. “Please don’t.”
“How did you get it to match mine so perfectly?”
He shrugged.
“That’s forever, you know.”
“What’s your point?” He challenged me.
“You put the orchid that means something to me on your vine. You can’t remove it. It’s permanent.”
“And so are you.”
“You didn’t have to do that to make your point,” I said softly.
“Sweetheart, this vine on my side holds together little pieces of all the places and things that matter to me. My grandparent’s initials are in the bottom, an anchor for my dad.
There’s a heart for my mom and a B for Brielle,” he said, working his finger up his side as he pointed out different things woven intricately into the vine.
“There’s a star for what I’ll always think of as home back in Texas and a horseshoe for my grandparent’s ranch.
And now,” he grinned, “there’s an orchid at the top of the vine for you.
Because whether you love me or leave me, you will always be someone special to me. The lady that captured my heart.”
“I think it was a fair exchange then because you’ve certainly captured mine, Mr. Quinn.”
I saw a flash of his dimple before his lips covered mine softly.
I took both sides of his face in my hands and guided him on top of me as I rolled onto my back.
He kissed from my mouth to my ear, down my throat and back to my lips again.
I ran my fingers through his hair, enjoying the feeling of his body, of the safety I felt with him.
Of the love.
A love I hadn’t felt before, a love I hadn’t allowed myself to feel before, lest my heart be left in shambles. Max’s acceptance of me, his assurances, his knowing everything and still coming for me soothed my soul and replaced the walls around my heart with confidence of being loved.
“I need you inside me,” I breathed against his ear as he nipped my bottom lip. I needed to feel him, to allow him every part of me. I wanted to cry in a weird way, the restraints I had always fought against now mostly gone. “Now, Max.”
He made quick work of ridding himself of his clothes and I kicked out of my pants. He tugged my shirt over my head and I pressed my hands against the small of his back, urging him towards me.
His eyebrows shot up and I shook my head no. A lazy grin graced his lips. “You sure?” he whispered, almost as if he was afraid to ask.
For the first time, I let him see me, the real me, without the shield. Without the fear. Without the baggage and questions and concerns.
“I’m sure. No condom,” I said softly.
His eyes grew wide, his grin mirroring it, as he sank himself inside my body and began to move.
“I love you,” I said softly.
He grinned in response and I was sure he felt the connection on a level much deeper than a physical one, too. “I love you, sweetheart.”
Kari
The light of one of my coconut candles cast a dim light across the kitchen and adjoining family room. I lay on the couch, a glass of wine in one of Max’s red cups on the coffee table. Train played softly on my iPhone. I looked out the window at the dark sky, the silver stars brighter than normal.
I smiled to myself as I listened to the lyrics. I had been out there looking for myself, trying to grow into someone that could deal with my fears and live my life in a way that kept me safe. Unhurt. Untouched.
I remembered seeing Max for the first time.
His sexy southern accent and knight in shining armor routine did me in.
At dinner at Maisano’s, I knew I was in trouble.
He was charming and kind and I had let him in a lot farther that very night than I ever expected to.
Just to keep things straight, I went home with him and kept him up all night long.
Then I left and didn’t call him back for over a week.
Over the past year and a half, I had tried to find my place in the world and all along it was wrapped around me. Max was my place in the world.
I’d never felt so accepted, flaws and all. I’d never felt so loved unconditionally, so sure that I could mess up and he would still be there. Because he was Max, the most loyal person I’d ever met.
“Hey, sweetheart. What ‘cha doing out here?”
I jerked my head to the side to see my man standing in the doorway. He walked slowly towards me, illuminated by the dim light. His hair was rumpled and his green checkered pajama bottoms wrinkled and hanging loose off his hips.
“I couldn’t sleep and I didn’t want to wake you up. So I’m just lying here looking at the stars.”
“You alright?” His eyes searched mine, looking for some sort of indication that I regretted being there.
“I’ve never been better.” I smiled at him and his shy grin melted me.
The song switched on the playlist and the guitar strums for Marry Me by Train began to play. Max’s face softened as he gazed in my eyes and grabbed my hand. He tugged me gently, bringing me to my feet. He led me to the middle of the living room.
As the singer hit the words of the chorus, Max wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me towards him, my body lining up with his. I rested my hands on his shoulders, laying my head on his chest.
We danced to the words, moving slowly back and forth across the room. My fingers played gently in his hair, the words soaking into my psyche.
Max squeezed me tighter, his strong arms embracing me for all I was worth. The candlelight flickered, casting shadows on all four walls.
I breathed him in, letting his scent dance through my senses, seducing, comforting, exciting me, calming me all at once.
Will I ever be able to say I will?
The final notes of the song played out and Max kissed the top of my head softly, letting his lips linger.
Finally, I pulled back and looked up to him, his features strong, yet soft.
The glimmer I always saw in his eyes was present, but for the first time, I saw it for what it was—love.
The kind of love my father had for my mother, that Cane had for Jada. Max had that for me.
And I had it for him.
“Wanna marry me?” he asked, grinning.
Instead of my usual immediate response, I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. “Just not tonight,” I whispered.
His eyes widened a bit, understanding evident in them. “One day, sweetheart. One day.”