Chapter 56
Beth
Caroline’s e-mail said she’d be back in London for only a quick forty-eight-hour turnaround, but if it really was that important, she could spare us ten minutes. Outside the apartment, Sadie gives me an encouraging smile. I ring the doorbell and step back, my heart pounding.
The door jerks open almost immediately, and though I’m not sure what I was expecting, it wasn’t this. Caroline stands there, glaring at us, and she’s holding a card at arm’s length, dangled between finger and thumb, as if she’s revolted by it.
“If you’re here because of this, I’m not interested. It’s going straight in the bin, and I don’t have time for chitchat.”
I stare at her, bemused, and then my gaze slides along her arm to the card: it’s another of Nina’s invitations.
“Can I see it?” Sadie asks, and she virtually snatches the card from Caroline’s hand. She scans it quickly, then gives me a shocked look. “Nina invited Caroline too.”
“I’ve literally just opened it,” Caroline snaps. “I’ve been away for three months. There’s no point sending me things like this in the post.”
Gingerly, I take the card from Sadie, and I read the blue looping handwriting on the back: We’d love to see you there!
“I guess now we know why Genevieve was hired at the last minute,” Sadie says to me. “A substitute for Caroline when she didn’t reply.”
Caroline makes an impatient noise. “Look, could you tell me what this is about? I’m really very busy.”
“I know,” I say.
She frowns. “What?”
“Everything. About Leonora’s game. About Markus. About—you. I know you’re my mother.”
She rocks back on her heels. After a few seconds of shock, her expression softens into something that looks like regret, and for a moment, I glimpse tears in her eyes. But when she finally speaks, her voice is calm and controlled.
“Who told you?”
No happy relief that the truth is finally out. Just that sharp question, as if she wanted the answer for one of her articles.
“Leonora,” I say. “She told me everything.”
Caroline’s shoulders sag. Sadie and I are barely across the threshold, the door still wide open behind us.
I shift uncomfortably, waiting for her to say something, although I don’t know what I’m hoping for—what could she possibly say that would make me feel better?
I almost wish I hadn’t come, but Sadie takes my hand, and her touch reminds me of my new resolutions.
To face the past. To be more open about my feelings.
“I was an idiot,” Caroline says eventually, quietly. She looks directly at me. “I thought sending you off to Raven Hall would solve all our problems—mine, yours, and theirs. I never thought anyone would guess . . .”
I stare at her. “But what about—before that? When Mum and Dad died, the accident. Didn’t you think, then . . . ?”
She shakes her head. “It was too late, by then, to tell you. How could I? And anyway, my work . . .”
Sadie makes a scathing noise, but I squeeze her hand to hush her. I want to hear everything Caroline has to say before we leave. Because I know we’re going to leave, and soon.
“Look, I’m sorry, Beth,” Caroline says. “I don’t know what else you want me to say. Your parents loved you. They’re the ones who wanted you. I tried, honestly, but I never could . . .” She drops her gaze. “I’m sorry.”
The silence stretches. Eventually, I look at my watch.
“Well, we’ll leave you to it,” I say.
Sadie gives Caroline a strange, penetrating look. “I feel sorry for you, Caroline.”
We leave then, Sadie and I. We walk back out of the apartment, hand in hand. I’m glad I faced Caroline, my mother. But I’m even more glad to be going home with my daughter now.