Chapter 28
Ethan
Six months later
“Good game,” Will says, strolling over to the bench in the locker room, a towel wrapped around his waist. “We’re celebrating tonight. You coming out with us?”
After a big win in Boston, all of the single guys on the team are going out to a local bar. I have no interest in drinking or hanging out with women other than Mia. I have plans with the other woman in my life.
I called my mom before the game. It had been too long since we last spoke on the phone and even longer since I last saw her.
Our relationship has been strained for a while now, but she’s alone here in Boston, in a massive house that’s too large for one person and with no one other than servants to help her.
I shake my head and stuff my jersey into my bag. “No, I can’t. I have plans.”
“C’mon, Waters,” Liam West says from behind me. “Don’t be a pussy. Come out with us.”
I glance over at him and smirk. “I have somewhere to be. I will next time.”
“Where are you going?” Will asks, plopping down on the bench next to me.
“I’m going over to the house to see my mom.”
“Oh.” Will’s mouth opens wide in shock. “You haven’t been there since…” his voice trails off because he knows it’s been over thirteen years since I stepped inside my childhood home.
We moved not long after the accident. My parents and I couldn’t stand the constant reminder of losing Erik. Until now, I had no desire to return.
After I leave the arena, I drive to my mom’s house.
A shiver rolls down my spine when I park in the circular driveway out front.
This place has always felt more like a museum than a home.
I stare up at the massive Victorian that spans the length of the property.
The high pillars, painted shutters, and the covered front porch look the same as when I was here last. Not a single thing has changed about my childhood home.
As I approach the front door, my mom opens the door instead of the butler. She must’ve heard me coming.
A smile stretches across her withered face, and she rushes forward, taking my face in her hands as tears stream down her cheek. “My baby,” she whispers. “You’re finally home.”
I smile as she releases her grip on me. “Hi, Mom. How are you?”
“Good, good.” She presses her hand to my back and guides me into the house, ushering me toward the kitchen. “I just made a pot of tea. Have some with me.”
I don’t drink caffeine because it messes with my game, but I can’t refuse my mother in her home. “Cream, two sugars,” I say as she fixes us two cups.
We sit at the table in the kitchen corner, right next to a wall of windows that overlooks the backyard.
She pushes a cup in front of me with a smile. “I was surprised to hear from you.”
“I’m sorry, Mom. I shouldn’t have created so much distance between us. My relationship was strained with Dad. It got in the way of us, and for that, I’m so sorry. I wanted to tell you that in person.”
She takes a sip from her tea and then pats my arm with her tiny hand. “It’s okay, baby. I understand. Your father was a complicated man. The two of you never got along.”
“Because I’m not Erik. He was always the favorite twin. Everyone liked him more.”
“That’s not true.” She sighs. “You’re my firstborn. I love you as much as I love your brother.”
“Dad always blamed me. He never gave a shit about me.”
She shakes her head. “In his way, he cared. Your father had a funny way of showing it, but he did. He didn’t blame you for Erik’s death, Ethan. I know you’ve always felt guilty about what happened to your brother, but there’s nothing you could have done to save him.”
“I crashed the car,” I challenge.
“Your brother had a brain aneurysm. It was like a ticking time bomb inside his head. No matter what, it would’ve killed him.
We never had any cause to send him for X-rays.
He never displayed any unusual behavior or signs he had anything wrong with him.
Whether or not you were driving the car, he died before you crashed.
It happened so fast. There was nothing you or anyone could have done for your brother. ”
“What if I could’ve gotten him to the hospital in time?”
“Ethan.” She taps her fingers on my hand. “Nothing can change the past. I know you feel like you could have done something, but the doctors have assured me that nothing would have saved Erik.”
“I know, Mom.” I squeeze her fingers between mine. “Sorry, it’s this house. Coming here is bringing back all of the old memories. Is Erik’s room still the same?”
She nods. “Do you want to see it?”
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
After we finish our tea, I follow my mom upstairs and creep toward my brother’s bedroom. I haven’t looked inside since I was sixteen years old. Before we left for Lower Merion, I took one last look at his things, feeling guilty that we were leaving Erik behind.
My mom pushes open the door, and my heart clenches when I see Erik’s trophies on the shelf above his king-size bed.
He was better than me at hockey. If he were still alive, we’d be competing against each other.
A few tears fall from my eyes as I step into the room, staring at the memories I’d almost forgotten.
Guilt washes over me when I consider how much of my past I’ve blocked out.
I’ve tried to share this part of my life with Will and Mia, but it hurts so much to think about my brother, let alone talk about him.
“Erik would’ve been so proud of you.” My mom clamps her hand around my wrist and squeezes it.
“You two were always so competitive.” She points at the first-place trophy and smiles.
“Remember when you and Erik tried out for the varsity team?” I nod, and she continues, “Neither of you ever wanted to be anything other than a hockey player. It wasn’t your father’s first career choice.
I know he never told you, but he was proud of you. ”
I stagger over to the bed and sink to the mattress, running my hand over the smooth navy comforter.
It was Erik’s favorite color. We both had the same one, though mine was cherry red to match my Mustang.
I lean back and stare up at the ceiling, taking in the scent of the fabric.
I swear it smells like my brother and another tear rolls down my cheek.
I’m home.
I never thought I would have the nerve to come back here again.
When I left with my parents, I never wanted to come back. This place was always too sterile, cold, and creepy to be a home.
“Come back to Philly with me.” I sit up and wipe the tears from my cheeks. “You can’t live here by yourself, Mom. You need to be around family.”
She sits next to me, a hint of a smile on her lips. “I’m not ready to leave. This is where I belong.”
“Dad and Erik are dead. Come live with me. I can take care of you.”
She glances down at the comforter and sighs. “I visit your father and brother every day.”
“Mom, please.” I cup her shoulder with my big hand, and she looks at me. “You’re visiting a cemetery. If you were in Philly, I could take care of you.”
“You have Mia to take care of now.”
“That’s the other reason I’m here,” I admit. “I love Mia. I want to marry her. Will gave me permission last night. I was hoping I could have Grandma’s ring.”
My grandmother’s engagement ring is an heirloom that dates back so far it might as well be tied to the Titanic. It’s worth a fortune, worn by every woman in my family. After Will blessed me to ask Mia to marry me, I knew she had to wear this ring. My grandma wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
She covers her mouth with her hand and squeals.
“Of course, baby. I knew you were in love with that girl when you were in high school. I’m glad the two of you have ended up together.
She’s good for you. I like the Romans. They’re good people.
They took care of you when you needed a family the most. I’m sorry if your father’s pain over your brother’s death got in the way of us being together, but I’m also glad that it brought you closer to the love of your life. ”
“I never thought I would get married,” I confess. “I was in too much pain for so many years that I never allowed anyone to get too close. Mia was the only one other than Will.”
My mom smiles so wide it reaches up to her green eyes that I got from her. “I’m happy you’re here. Can you stay the night? We can go through the photo albums. Mia will want some of the pictures for your wedding.”
I return her smile. “Sure, I can stay until morning.”
I spent the rest of the night pouring over old pictures with my mom, rehashing the memories I had long forgotten. Because of Mia, I remember things I should never have left in the past. Because of her, I’m starting to feel whole again.
On our relaxing Sunday drive to the suburbs of Philadelphia, I roll down the convertible top. Mia throws her hands in the air, the wind blowing her hair as she glances at me. She flashes a smile that illuminates her face.
I took the old Mustang Fastback out of storage. It only seemed fitting to recreate every memory from our past for the occasion.
Mia lowers her arms. She drops her hand to my knee and squeezes. “Where are we going?”
I tuck a loose strand of blonde hair behind her ear to see her beautiful face. “Patience, little lamb. It’s a surprise.”
She crosses her arms over her chest, pushing up her perky tits, and pretends to sulk. “Stupid wolf,” she mumbles under her breath, even though I can hear her.
I laugh. “Would you let me plan something without nagging me about every detail?”
“I’m an investigative journalist. It’s my job to ask questions.”
I nod, a smile forming.
Mia finally found her big break after giving up on the Old City Records case.
She followed a tip from one of her sources and landed a front-page spread about a local politician’s campaign tampering.
I couldn’t contain my excitement when I saw Mia’s picture on the front page of The Philadelphia Inquirer. She worked so hard to get there.