Chapter 57
Joe was in a grumpy mood. This was obvious to everyone both at the main school and at Puddleducks, where the impending nativity play and of course the good news about Danny had resulted in a permanent high.
The worst thing, Joe told himself grimly as he tried to instil some order into Reception by giving them a fun maths quiz before the final rehearsal, was that his grumpiness was obvious even to him. He could not discount the fact that his mood was not unrelated to Gemma Merryfield’s recent engagement.
Ridiculous. He hadn’t even found her attractive back in September. Then again, it hadn’t been her face he’d been looking at when they’d first met. It had been his bike. The whole silly incident had got them both off to a bad start. It wasn’t as though his Harley had even been damaged. But he’d spoken sharply, instead of thinking first.
Brian’s help and advice had softened Joe. Over the months, he had inexplicably found himself drawn to this girl who somehow managed to combine a sense of fun at Puddleducks with good organisational skills. Then, when she’d started seeing that oaf of a paratrooper with his baby face and lithe body that could bound up the staircase like an over-eager puppy, he began to see Gemma in a new light. Gone were the brown trousers and cardigans that she tended to wear during the day at Puddleducks. He watched her leaving her room at Joyce’s in knee-length dresses with long black boots, and looking at Action Man as though she was star-struck.
Yes, of course it was admirable that the man was fighting for his country, as Joyce was always reminding everyone.
And yes of course he was a fool to loathe him. But, thought Joe, as he collected in the fun maths quiz answers from a highly energised Reception, he realised now that he had been a fool to dismiss Gemma so easily at the beginning. She had, he could see now, all the traits he admired in a woman. She was feisty, kind, honourable, fun to be with (mostly), and stubborn just like him. If they hadn’t got off to the wrong start over his bike and if he hadn’t still been licking his wounds over Ed, it might have been very different. Now she’d gone and got herself engaged and it was too late.
‘Mr Balls, Mr Balls!’ shouted Elsie, her face shining with excitement as she jolted him back into the present. ‘They’re coming.’
So they were. Joe looked out of the window along with thirty pairs of eyes and saw Gemma and Bella, her rather aloof assistant who wore heels that were too high for the classroom. She spotted him, waved and nearly dropped the box of costumes she was carrying.
Joe had never flushed in his life, but felt he was in danger of doing so now. Unless he had caught Joyce’s menopausal symptoms, which she was all too ready to discuss, this was one more piece of evidence that he was no longer in control of his feelings.
Not good. Something had to be done about this. ‘No one,’ he said in that quiet ‘I mean business’ tone which had usually worked on even the most unruly kid in his inner-city school, ‘I repeat no one is to move until they have tidied up their table. Only when I have inspected them will you be allowed to line up at the door to go down to the main hall where we will be having the rehearsal.’
Who’s in a bad mood then? He could almost hear Ed’s voice in his head. OK. She was right. And maybe she was right about that other thing which they’d been talking about almost every evening this week.
‘So the thwee withe women followed the thtar until they found Baby Jeeeethus.’
Joe rolled his eyes as he sat awkwardly on the floor. Someone had moved the adult-sized chairs, and although it was all very well for Gemma with her small frame to sit on one of the kiddy chairs, he wasn’t physically able to even if he had wanted to. The seat would only have taken one half of his rear end. Maybe it was time to join a gym: if Brian could do it, so could he.
Gemma was leaning forward with that encouraging smile of hers, which was almost as dazzling as that vulgar stone on her left hand. ‘Very good, Darren.’
Very good? Who was she kidding? Joe prided himself on not belonging to the band of teachers who praised children for all and sundry. Brian had said he was with him on that one. There was a kid the other year who’d got a certificate for getting on and off the bus. Ridiculous.
Now a boy with purple glasses was piping up. ‘The three wise women walked for miles and miles.’
‘Excuse me.’ Joe awkwardly got to his feet. ‘Could we have a word?’
He gestured to Gemma that they should go to the back of the hall. Never criticise a member of staff in front of the children, Mike had advised when Joe had first started.
‘Why did you pick the first narrator, with his lisp?’ he demanded.
Gemma gave him a cool look. When he spoke like that, she seemed to say, it was as though the kind, understanding Joe, who’d been so comforting about Danny, hadn’t existed. Immediately, he wanted to apologise.
‘Darren didn’t have one at the beginning of term,’ she said softly, ‘but his parents are in the middle of a divorce and he’s started talking in a babylike way. It can happen when a child feels insecure.’
Ouch. ‘Sorry. I can see that. But what about this “miles and miles” stuff? We’ve been metric for years. It ought to be kilometres and kilometres.’
Gemma snorted with laughter. ‘Are you joking? It’s always been “miles” in traditional scripts.’
‘Traditional? With three wise women?’
Gemma put her head on one side as though considering something. ‘You might have a point. Can we talk about it later? I don’t want to delay proceedings any more. Not when Billy is about to perform as the front half of the ox. You never know what’s going to happen.’
Good point. Joe wasn’t looking forward to that particular whirlwind joining his class next year.
‘Oh no.’ Gemma pointed to the white sheet that was waiting in the wings. Underneath it, two pairs of shoes were kicking each other impatiently. But that wasn’t what she was looking at. Underneath the back legs was a brown circle of cow pat. Except it wasn’t from a cow.
‘Sorry, Mrs Merryfield,’ came a small voice from the rear end. ‘I couldn’t wait.’
After that, it all went to pieces. A shepherd did a bunk in order to scale the wall bars at the other end of the hall. The Virgin Mary declared that her mother had just had her colours done and that this particular shade of blue didn’t suit her because she was spring and not autumn. One of the stars went to pieces, literally, in a costume that had been tacked together by Toby’s dad, who’d also managed to sew dog hairs into the tinsel. And Johnnie kept saying ‘sin’ instead of ‘inn’. ‘It will be all right on the night,’ said Bella bouncily as they tried to get the children to tidy up after it was all over. ‘They’re just excited because it’s so near Christmas. I must say, I do think that this term seems much longer than it usually does.’
She was waving her hands around as she spoke, and Gemma caught a flash. ‘Bella, is that a ring on your finger? I mean a different finger?’
Bella glowed, proffering her left hand. The diamond which had been on her used-to-be-engaged-but-not-any-longer finger was now back on the usual fourth finger. ‘We made up,’ she cooed happily. ‘Just in time for Christmas.’
Joe made a noise at the back of his throat as a warning signal. ‘Excuse me, ladies, but we do have ears here.’
It was an expression he’d picked up from Lynette, warning him and Mike not to say certain things in front of the children. Instantly, both women stopped and gave each other a look he couldn’t read. Why did women have this secret language and more importantly, how could he download the phrase book?
‘You’re right,’ said Bella with a glossy smile. ‘If you don’t mind me saying so, you’re picking up the lingo rather nicely.’
Not long ago, Joe would have said something about picking up the lingo faster if everyone had been more welcoming at the beginning. Now, too late, he could see that things might have been different if he, too, had made more of an attempt to fit in.
‘Thanks.’ He nodded at Bella’s ring. ‘Congratulations.’ Then he nodded in the general direction of Gemma’s left hand. ‘Looks like you’re all doing it!’ It was meant to be a joke, but it seemed to come out more like sarcasm. ‘Right, my class. Line up by the door please, ready for lunch.’
Behind him he could hear Bella giggle and say something about being in the army. Gemma was whispering something back. Something, if he wasn’t wrong, about him having a firmer hand than Brian and that it wasn’t a bad thing.
That made him feel more uncomfortable. In a way, he told himself as he marched the children along the corridor, he preferred it when there’d been cool hostility between them. It made it easier to shut out his feelings; feelings which he’d allowed to creep in, despite himself.
Maybe it was time to go back to the old Joe and stick to numbers instead. At least you couldn’t get them wrong. Not where the heart was concerned, at any rate.