Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-Two
OLIVIA
A t three o’clock in the morning, I still couldn’t sleep.
Even though the sex after our argument had been explosive, my mind was still reeling. While Gabriel lay peacefully next to me, his breathing slow and rhythmic, all I could do was stare through the darkness at the ceiling above.
Something had changed between us tonight. Something fundamental.
Even our argument had changed.
No matter how heated our words became, there were no veiled threats. No condescending tones. We may have disagreed with each other vehemently at times, but we’d done so as equals.
At no point did he disregard my point of view outright, and I never resorted to name-calling. No matter how passionate our conversation became, it never descended into nastiness. It always remained respectful and ended with us having a deeper understanding of each other.
And strangely, that was what concerned me most of all.
Because people who argued like that actually cared about each other. They weren’t just two souls that were so blinded by lust that they couldn’t keep their hands off each other.
They were a couple.
A real couple.
And that was a frightening thought. The kind that had my mind whirling in the dead of night.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. I wasn’t supposed to fall for a mob boss, especially not one who was after my brother and out to destroy my family’s business. It didn’t make sense.
I’d always been the rational one. Back when I was a kid, I shook my head at Belle for falling in love with the Beast. I was the type who complained against fairy tales for promoting Stockholm syndrome.
And yet, here I was, falling in love with the monster myself.
Clearly, what my naive younger self didn’t understand was that sometimes the monster is the only one who understands your pain. That the beast is the only one who knows the value of protection from a world that couldn’t care less about your well-being. Or that only a villain can truly appreciate the redemptive power of love.
My heart understood these things now. But my head…
My head was still struggling to reconcile them with the fact that Gabriel was still a threat to those I loved. And that if I didn’t do something soon, he would be forced to take actions I would never be able to forgive him for.
Which meant it was up to me to stop that from happening.
And if I had any hope of sleeping tonight, I needed to do it now.
After turning my head to the side to make sure Gabriel’s eyes were still closed, I gently peeled back the sheets and quietly rolled out of bed. He didn’t stir as I tiptoed across the room or when I slid the robe he’d been wearing earlier off the chair.
Being Gabriel’s though, the garment was so much larger than I was used to. I had to hoist it up and wrap the belt around my waist a couple of times to keep from tripping over the hem. But somehow, I made it all the way to the door without creaking a single floorboard. Even the door hinges were on my side, swinging open as easily and silently.
Once I was out of the bedroom, I became less careful and more focused on speed. Staying on tiptoes, I picked up my pace, racing out into the hall and down the steps to Gabriel’s office on the second floor.
With two floors of space between us, I felt like I could breathe again.
I pulled the phone out of the drawer and waited in the dark as it powered up. Then I called my brother.
This time, it actually rang a few times before sending me to voicemail—a sign that Theo had turned his phone back on.
“Hey, Theo,” I said softly after the beep. “It’s Liv.”
I was back to being Liv with him again. It didn’t matter that I was still upset with him for his bad choices. If the worst-case scenario happened, the last thing I wanted was for him to die thinking I hated him.
“I know my last few messages to you have been a little desperate,” I continued, my voice softening with every word. “But that’s only because you’re my brother. I…I love you, and I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.”
It was true.
It didn’t matter that he was a screw-up. It didn’t matter that, more often than not, he was a total pain in the all. He was still my brother.
“But if you don’t do what’s necessary to get the D’Angelos their money, something bad will happen, Theo.”
My heart ached just saying the words out loud.
“You know what you have to do,” I told him. “And while I can’t make you do it, I keep praying you will. Because I don’t want to lose you, Theo.”
And I didn’t want to lose Gabriel either.
Now that I’d finally found this faint sliver of happiness, the only thing I wanted was a little peace so I could enjoy it.
“So, this is the last time I’m going to call you,” I said, realizing that this time I actually meant it. “I’m not going to hound you anymore. Instead, I’m going to believe that just this once, you’ll dust off your selfishness and clean up your own mess.”
I closed my eyes in the darkness and leaned my head back against the chair.
“I’m going to trust you to do what’s right.”
Letting out a long breath, I ended the call. After sliding the phone back in the drawer, I got up and walked out of the office.
I wish I could say I was surprised when I saw Gabriel standing just outside, but I wasn’t. Not really. After living in his house and being by his side for so long, I’d grown used to how he always seemed to be right there.
The only truly surprising thing was that he didn’t seem upset.
In fact, the look in his fathomless eyes was strangely understanding as he towered over me.
“Are you done?” he asked.
I nodded.
“Do you feel better?”
“A little,” I answered.
“Good,” he said before wrapping his arm around my shoulder. “Then maybe now you can finally fall asleep.”
That was the hope.
“How do you do it?” I asked Mrs. Tarolli the next morning after Gabriel and Matteo had left for the day.
I watched her out of the corner of my eye as she turned toward me. I didn’t look up. I didn’t want to face her, afraid that if I did, I wouldn’t be able to ask the questions that had been burning in my head since the moment Gabriel had silently led me back to bed last night.
“The cornetti?” she asked.
It was a reasonable question, seeing as that’s where my gaze had settled—on the plate of perfectly rolled pastries she’d put out for breakfast. She must have redone all the ones I’d bungled.
“It’s just practice, dear,” she assured me. “Give it time, and one day, yours will be as good as mine, I promise.”
I only wished I was talking about something so simple.
“No.” I shook my head. “I’m talking about Gabriel and his brothers. How do you reconcile working with this family and being a good, decent human being?”
“Oh… that ,” the housekeeper said, wiping the flour off her hands with her apron. Letting out a long sigh, she pulled out the stool across the kitchen island from me, and for the first time since I’d first met her, I watched her take a seat. “I’ve been wondering when this conversation was going to happen.”
I risked peeling my eyes away from the cornetti to meet her caring gray gaze. “You have?”
“Of course,” she said with a knowing nod. “I’m no fool, you know. I’ve worked in this house for over forty years now. I’ve seen and heard things that would make the devil blush.”
I didn’t doubt that for a second.
“So, how do you compartmentalize it?” I asked.
“Well, I don’t know about whatever that is?” she said with a wave of her hand. “But I can tell you my method of dealing with all the good and bad things that have crossed my path in this house.”
I couldn’t help the smile that crept over my face. “I appreciate that.”
“It’s really quite simple,” she said, reaching out and grabbing a pastry for herself—another first. “Love.”
My brows shot up. “ Love ?”
“Exactly,” she answered with a nod. “When the boys’ father gave me my first job in America, right off the boat from Sicily all those years ago, I loved him for it. Not like you love Mr. Gabriel, of course. But love all the same.”
I opened my mouth, ready to quickly correct her about the depths of my feelings toward Gabriel, but she had already moved on.
“And when the bambinos were born, I loved them instantly,” she continued. “And that love only grew through the years.”
I cocked my head to the side. “So…what? That love means you just forgive them for all the horrible things they do?”
She shook her head, popping a piece of bun into her mouth. “It’s much simpler than that,” she said. “It means I don’t put myself in the position to judge them in the first place.”
“I…I don’t think I understand.”
“That’s all right.” The older woman graced me with a patient smile. “One thing I’ve noticed about you Americans in the last forty years is that you like it when everything falls into neat categories. Heroes in the white hats, villains in the black. There’s no room for anyone to exist in the middle. One must always pick a side.”
I could see her point, even if I didn’t fully agree with it.
“I guess we can be a little all-or-nothing in our thinking,” I said. “But you have to admit that some things are truly bad.”
“Like murder, you mean?”
“Exactly!”
See, I knew she’d understand.
“Except if the killing is in self-defense,” she said.
“Well, of course.” That went without saying.
“Or soldiers in combat,” she continued. “Or if someone was trying to harm those you love. Or if you knew they were about to do something truly heinous. Or?—“
“Okay, you’ve made your point. I get it.” I held up my hands, stopping her. “Maybe I can be a little rigid in my thinking. It’s how I was raised.”
“That is understandable,” Mrs. Tarolli said without a hint of judgement. “But you should know your Gabriel was raised a different way.”
“What way is that?”
“Gabriel’s father, Giuseppe, believed that all men, regardless of the circumstances they were born into, were only worthy of respect if they lived by a code of honor,” she explained. “Specific religions or philosophies weren’t important. Minor mistakes were insignificant. The only thing that mattered was that when times were tough, they made the best of them. That they acted for the good of the community instead of self-interest.”
How many times had I seen Gabriel living out that value? From all the generous tips to those who worked hard to using his fortune to help those in need, he never wanted praise.
“The unworthy, on the other hand,” she continued, “would prove they had no code by always acting out of greed, whether for money or power. And I’ve lived in this house long enough to see both kinds of men rise to the top of the D’Angelo family.”
It took me a moment to realize who she was meant. “Are you talking about Gabriel’s uncle? The one he’d killed to take over as boss?”
“Killed? You make it sound like a bad thing.” The housekeeper rolled her eyes in disgust before pantomiming spitting at the floor. “That Sal was a rat who lived under our noses for far too long.”
My eyes widened at her violent response. “Why? What did he do?”
“How do you not know?” Mrs. Tarolli asked, shooting me a confused look. “The man killed his own brother here in this house. He murdered Gabriel’s father because he wanted to his power.”
My mouth fell open.
For a second, I couldn’t find the words to express my shock. All I could do was blink.
“Did Gabriel know that when he gave the order to kill his uncle?” I finally asked, leaning so far forward in my seat I risked toppling over onto the floor.
“Of course, he knew,” she answered with an indignant huff. “How can you even ask that?”
“I don’t know.” I shook my head, rethinking everything I thought I knew. “I was only going by what I’d seen in the news.”
Another eye roll.
“Rumors and trash—all of it,” she declared. “Gabriel only did what he had to do. It was justice, pure and simple. And I won’t listen to anyone say otherwise.”
“I…I didn’t know,” I admitted, suddenly feeling bad for having thought the worst of him for so long.
“That’s because Mr. Gabriel isn’t the type to share a shameful story about his family, not even if it would benefit him,” she said. “He’s a man of honor, far more like his father than his uncle, thank the Lord. And you, my dear, are lucky to have him.”
She was right.
I was lucky.
Luckier than I ever realized.