Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
S pending hours in a car with a woman who hated him was painful. Spending hours in a car with a woman he loved to distraction—a woman he knew from the coils of her hair to her pink-painted toe nails, a woman who hadn’t always hated him but certainly did now—was torture.
Ruben really fucking wished he’d given her the ring before now. But they couldn’t meet his brother without it, and in a few short minutes, they’d be there. At the palace. The backdrop to all his nightmares.
“Cherry,” he said, cracking the thick slab of silence between them.
She turned her head from the window and looked across the limo’s dark interior to meet his eyes, her movements robotic. She didn’t reply. Just looked, her gaze burning, beautifully furious and breaking his fucking heart.
His hands clumsier than usual, Ruben fumbled with the pocket inside his suit jacket for a few heavy seconds before producing the ring.
There was no box; he didn’t know where the original one was, and he didn’t particularly care.
The ring was all that mattered, and his mother would want Cherry to have it.
He wanted Cherry to have it.
But Cherry was looking down at the diamond and sapphire ring in his hands as if it were a poisonous snake.
“You need to wear it,” he said gently. “For Harald.”
“Fucking Harald,” she muttered, holding out a hand for the ring. He wanted to smile at the sound of his own personal refrain on her lips. She hadn’t even met the king yet, but she already hated him. It almost made Ruben forget that Harald wasn’t the only royal she hated right now.
As the car slowed, the sense of panicked urgency that had been choking Ruben all morning—since last night, in fact—swelled to its crescendo. He must’ve lost his mind for a moment, because instead of handing her the ring, he reached out to take her hand in his.
“Cherry,” he said, his voice low. “Listen to me, okay? Just listen.”
She glared, tried to tug her hand away, but he couldn’t let go. He couldn’t.
“Please. Please let me explain. Last night—”
“I don’t want to talk about last night,” she said sharply. Her mouth, so lush and full, was pressed into a hard, thin line. And he caught something vulnerable in her eyes, a wariness he’d put there. The sight threatened to tear his heart in two .
“I wasn’t thinking,” he said. “It had nothing to do with you. I’ve always been like that. I can’t bear the idea of children—”
“You love children,” she said, and for the first time he caught a flash of hurt in her voice. He’d known it was there, but hearing it…
She heard it too, because she looked horrified for a second, and then completely blank. When she spoke again, her voice was hard as steel. “It doesn’t matter. It’s ridiculous. I just don’t think it’s wise for us to keep blurring lines like this.”
“I hurt you,” he said. “I know I did. And that’s the last thing I wanted to do, because I don’t think of this as blurring lines, Cherry. That’s not what we’re doing. Being with you is a gift.”
The car came to a stop, and she gave him a mutinous glare, tugging at their joined hands. “Stop this. Just give me the fucking ring.”
He wanted to blurt out the fact that he loved her, but she’d probably punch him in the face.
So he released her with a sigh, and gave her the ring, and she shoved it onto her finger as if it were an afterthought.
For all she knew, it was meaningless, something he’d had Demi order for the purpose of this twisted charade.
She had no idea how much that ring meant to him, and no idea how much she meant to him.
But he’d tell her. He’d make her see. Somehow. And he’d tell her about the thoughts that haunted him, about the anxiety that suffocated him whenever he thought of children, of creating another soul that might one day end up like him: vulnerable. Alone. Abused.
The car door swung open and an anonymous hand reached in to help Cherry out, part of the security team.
He heard her greet the man with her usual charm, her sparkling laughter floating into the car within seconds.
She was already working her magic. And Ruben was frozen in time, struggling to breathe.
Because it had just occurred to him that he might fail.
He might not get through to her. He might not prove his feelings or win back her trust.
And then, when the year was up, she’d leave.
Ruben was used to having Hans at his back. He wasn't used to having Cherry by his side. But there she was, striding down this gilded hall with him, matching him step for step. Though her steps were more of a strut.
The corridor leading towards his brother's receiving room was as splendid as the rest of the palace, which made it fucking abhorrent to Ruben.
But he wasn't going to pretend that vaulted ceilings and marble cherubs and velvet tapestries were a hardship on anything other than his taste.
No, it wasn't the luxury that sent a bead of sweat crawling down his spine beneath the fancy fucking dress uniform he wore.
It was the memories.
“Good morning, Ruben. Are you ready for your lessons?”
Five year old Magnus blinked up at his older brother. “I already had my lessons, Harald. Who is Ruben?”
“ You,” his brother said in a voice Magnus didn't recognise. A voice he didn't quite like. It reminded him a little bit of when his daddy would tell him off. But when Daddy told him off, he was never afraid.
“ When is Daddy coming back?” he asked.
Harald's face hardened. “He is not coming back, you little idiot. You don't come back from the sky.”
Magnus felt tears begin to pool at the corners of his eyes. “Why not? God is nice. God will let Daddy and Mummy come down to see me—”
All at once, Magnus felt his feet lifted from the floor.
It made his stomach flip, the way it used to when Mummy picked him up and swung him round.
But then the flip went away and was replaced by pain.
His back and his head slammed into the wall, and Harald held him tight with hands that felt hard as stone.
Magnus felt his tears stream over his cheeks, but he was too breathless to scream out at the pain. As he gasped for air, he saw his brother sneer.
“ Crying like a baby,” he spat. “Be a man. Men don't cry.”
Magnus couldn't stop himself from sobbing. The pain in his back and his head was searing, burning, the worst thing he'd ever felt, and Harald was scaring him, his face all twisted up and his hands so hard.
“ Ruben!” Harald snapped, and shook him, hard.
Magnus cried out, “That is not my name! My name is Magnus! My name is Mag— ”
“ Harald.” The door shut with a sharp click, and light footsteps pattered across the floor.
Magnus knew that voice. This was his sister, Sophronia.
She would help him. She would fix his head.
He held out his arms towards the sound of her voice, his vision blurred by the tears that he still couldn't stop. “Sophy! Sophy!”
“ Oh, for goodness sake, Harald. We talked about this.”
Magnus didn't know what that meant, but he knew Sophy would help him. She was the one who always played with him and Daddy, whenever she came to visit. She was always smiling and sweet. She would take him away from Harald who had become so mean.
“ You can't leave marks on him,” Sophy said.
“ I didn't. He's crying for no reason. He’s spoilt.”
“ Someone will hear him screaming.”
“ Let them. He needs to learn. Don't you, Ruben?” Another shake, harder than the first, and Magnus's head rang and rang like a big church bell, pain spreading out like a spider's web.
Still, he cried, his voice halting and choked, “My name is Magnus!”
Then he felt his sister. Her cool, soft touch against his cheeks, wiping away the tears until his vision was clear and his breath was calm. He looked up at her with gladness in his heart. She was so pretty, different to Mummy, but a little the same. Mummy was pretty too.
But she didn't take him away. She glared at Harald, but then she said to Magnus, her voice firm, “You mustn't cry, Ruben.”
His face crumpled and the tears returned. “No! No Ruben! My name is Magnus!”
“Shush,” she said briskly. “Stop that. Be a big boy. Now, listen: one of your names is Magnus, but that's Daddy's name. We can't call you Daddy's name, now, can we? ”
The tears slowed slightly as Magnus thought on this. He looked at Harald. Harald was staring up at the ceiling, his expression bored, like it was when Daddy used to talk to him about school work and things. His grip was still hard, but he wasn't shaking Magnus or shouting anymore.
Warily, Magnus turned his eyes back to Sophy. “Why not?” he asked. “Daddy said—”
“ Never mind what Daddy said. Harald is in charge now, and he has decided that you are called Ruben. Ruben is your second name. It would make me very happy if you used it. Alright?”
Magnus nodded slowly. “Okay," he whispered. “I will try.”
“ Good." She turned away, sweeping from the room in her long dress like a fairy princess. But wait—why was she leaving him?
“ Sophy," he called. “Come back. My head hurts.”
She paused in the doorway, looking over her shoulder at him. And she said, “Grow up, Ruben.”
Then she was gone.
“His Royal Highness Prince Ruben and his fiancée, Miss Cherry Neita.”
Ruben didn't recognise the head butler, the tall, gaunt man who introduced them. But that didn't mean he hadn't met the man. It was just, his vision felt slightly blurry and his head ached just a bit.
He hesitated on the threshold of the receiving room, suddenly disorientated.
But then he felt a soft hand clasp his. He looked down to see Cherry's sparkly pink nails standing out brightly against the back of his hand. Felt the cool band of his mother’s ring on her finger.
Then he looked up and locked eyes with the most formidable woman in the world.
His vision cleared. The ringing in his ears faded away. He clutched her hand and set his jaw and walked into the fucking room.