Chapter 11
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My lunch beeps, and I pull the sleeves of my sweater over my hands to take the hot container out and walk to the empty table a few feet away, rather than taking it back to my empty classroom like normal.
There’s a trio of older teachers at the table near the door. I don’t ask to sit with them and they don’t offer.
“Hey!” Tess says as I fan my mouth from the molten cheese I just shoved in it. “Want me to blow in your mouth?” she asks.
I nearly choke as I shake my head hard enough to dislodge my brain.
“Kidding.” She grins as she takes a seat opposite me and unpacks a sandwich. “This is nice! I usually eat lunch by myself, which you’d think would be great after all the ‘Ms. Brooks’ this and ‘Ms. Brooks’ that, but I need some adult interaction, you know?”
Not really. I like my solitude, but I say, “It must be hard teaching a bunch of four and five year olds. Second is the youngest grade I’ve taught.” Something tugs at my memory as I blow on another bite of Gia’s delicious chicken parm from last night. “Wait, did you say Brooks?”
She nods.
“I think your brother was a year ahead of me in high school. Super competitive? Famously cross-examined the principal when he tightened up the dress code? Nash Brooks?”
Tess looks too young to have overlapped with us, but they have the same eyes.
Her smile is incandescent. “That’s my brother! It’ll come as no surprise he’s a fancy lawyer now.” She takes a bite of her sandwich. Her blue eyes—not deep blue like Sawyer’s, but bright like the sky—study me for a moment. “So you’re from Blue Ridge. Are you so glad to be back?”
“It’s changed a lot,” I hedge.
“Isn’t it great?” Tess asks dreamily. “I fell in love with Blue Ridge when we moved here in elementary school, but it just keeps getting better and better.”
My face stays neutral as I nod, but she sounds bananas.
“I can’t imagine living anywhere else,” she goes on.
“I went to school in Knoxville, but it was too Big City for me. Blue Ridge is more my speed. Everyone knows one another, Maddy’s Bakery has her apple cider cake donuts, the Book Nook always has the newest Jackie Pine romance. Blue Ridge has everything you need.”
She looks at me expectantly, so I say, “What about Jolly Jalapeno? That place seems popular. You ever go there with friends?” Remembering what Gia said, I add, “I hear it’s the place to go if you’re young and childless.”
Tess’s reaction stops me mid-chuckle. She’s suddenly very interested in her sandwich bag as her smile grows rigid. “I don’t go out much. Teachers are early risers, right?” Then she shrugs so nonchalantly it comes back around to being very un-nonchalant. Chalant.
It’s clear Tess wants to move on, and I feel bad for mentioning it, so I change the subject. “Do you hang out with Nash a lot?”
Her face lights up, but it doesn’t meet her eyes. “Not as often as I’d like. He lives in Chattanooga.”
My brows drop. “That’s, what, an hour and a half away?”
“An hour fifteen,” she corrects. “But he’s so busy. Especially right now with the Kelly case.”
“Who’s Kelly?” I ask.
She shrugs, “No idea, but every time I call, he has to go a few minutes later because he’s ‘swamped with the Kelly case.’” A thought seems to occur to Tess. “If you were in school with my brother, you must have already known Sawyer.”
Shit. Didn’t think it through when I brought Nash up. I focus on my lunch.
She tilts her head. “So . . . were you friends with Sawyer in high school?”
“Not exactly.” It wasn’t supposed to come out so terse.
Her expression changes into an open-mouthed grin, eager for a good story. I’m used to this.
She moves her sandwich to the side and plops her elbows on the table. “Tell me.”
With a forkful of chicken parm in my mouth, I mumble, “There’s nothing to tell.”
“Then why does your face do that weird thing when I say his name?” she asks.
“Hm?”
“Sawyer,” she says. “There!”
I put on a blank face and think detached thoughts. I am the epitome of unaffected.
“Sawyer,” Tess tries again, then giggles as I feel my face twist. “Sawyer. Sawyer. Sawyer!” She leans in more, nearly halfway over the table now, ready for me to spill the tea. “Did you guys date?”
“Oh my god, no. Definitely not.”
Sitting back, she eyes me. “I heard he was totally different in high school. Nash thought I was joking when I told him who the new principal was.”
“New?” I can’t help asking.
“Principal Brown retired at the end of last year.”
“Principal Brown?” I ask. “As in Sadge Brown?”
She grins. “The very same. Working for him really wasn’t all that different from being a student under him.”
I laugh imagining it.
“So . . .” she starts again. “Sawyer?”
My nails dig into my palms. If I don’t tell her something, she’ll probably just ask Nash. He was only a year older than us. What happened at prom probably got back to him through people he was still friends with after he left for college.
All she has to do is tell Nash I started working here. I’m sure the first thing out of his mouth would be And the place didn’t crumble into dust?
Tess must see something in my expression, because she holds up her hands. “Sorry! I just met you, I shouldn’t have asked. Everyone has a right to privacy.”
My phone pings with a reminder. Five minutes before I retrieve my class from the cafeteria.
I could tell her something. It’s not like Sawyer’s treatment of me is even a secret, how could it be in this town? A fresh start was never realistic for me here.
And it’s all temporary anyway. I’m out at the end of the semester. By then, schools will have hired for next year.
I take one more look at Tess. The way she looks at me is different than anyone from Everett Academy, the pack of hyenas that tried to rip me apart. Their questions were laced with vindictiveness, hungry for any drama they could get their hands on and regurgitate to others.
But Tess seems nice. Innocent, even. She has no idea who Sawyer was to me in school. She probably thinks she was merely asking a normal get-to-know-you question.
Softening, I say, “It’s okay, I just don’t like gossip. Sawyer wasn’t the nicest to me when we were younger.”
Tess’s eyebrows shoot together, eyes big. “Really?”
I shrug like it’s no big deal. “Mostly teasing. Loud-mouth stuff.”
For the first time, the smile disappears from Tess’s face as she presses her lips together and takes one of my hands in both of hers.
It surprises me, but it grounds me, too. Reminds me I’m in the here-and-now. School is way in the past.
“I get the sense there’s more to it,” she says, “and I’m sorry that happened to you.” She hesitates, like she’s debating what to say next. “I know what it’s like to be treated poorly.”
Titling my head, I wonder what kind of monster would treat this woman poorly.
She squeezes my hand, her face earnest. “I know this is going to be hard to believe,” she says. “I mean, everyone changes, but most people don’t change who they really are inside, you know? But Sawyer—”
My phone alarm goes off, jarring us both out of the moment.
Tess releases my hands, and bites her lip. “Sorry if that was too much or weird.”
Laughter bubbles up my throat as I gather my things and stand. “It was weird. And maybe too much. But I didn’t mind it,” I say, surprised to find it’s true.
She mimes wiping sweat off her brow. “Phew!”
“Have a good rest of the day,” I say as I gather my things.
“See you tomorrow at lunch!” she calls out after me.
I chuckle as I leave the lounge, feeling lighter somehow. Controlling the narrative has its merits. Maybe she won’t even find out what Sawyer did to me at prom.