Chapter 54 Brie
brIE
I shove into the ladies room, throw open a stall, and promptly vomit. The retching sounds echo off the tiles.
How do I keep surprising myself? Every time I think I’ve learned a lesson, I prove myself naive all over again. It’s like I learned nothing from what happened at Everett.
Then again, pride thrums deep in my chest at the way I stood up for myself back there. I never would’ve said those things six months ago.
When my body has calmed down, I flush and go to the sink to rinse my mouth. I glance at the mirror, startling at my appearance. Smudged eyes, clammy, pale skin, hair sticking to my forehead.
“What a mess,” I mutter, tying my hair back and splashing cold water on my face.
What am I going to do? I don’t regret telling the committee off, but now that my adrenaline’s faded, the stark reality of the situation hits me. I have student loans. A car payment. Hunger. Working at the diner is not a viable option. I need a real job, one with benefits and vacation days.
It’s an equation with no solution. I’m not qualified to do anything except teach. The committee won’t let me teach here in Blue Ridge. And I won’t leave Blue Ridge.
I swipe all these worries into a drawer in my mind and lock it. One obstacle at a time.
With a paper towel, I dry my face and take another look in the mirror.
At least I resemble a human being again.
Buttoning my jacket, I square my shoulders, lift my chin, and walk out of the bathroom, determined to stride straight for exit.
I have to pass the meeting room to get there, and I refuse to let those bloodsuckers see me upset.
Halfway down the corridor, I stop short at a familiar, deep voice.
Sawyer.
He’s come for me.
I can’t hear what he’s saying, but his tone is serious and urgent. With quick steps, I ease closer, careful my heels don’t click.
Someone else speaks, Mr. Strong, I think.
“Granted,” Sawyer’s words are audible now, “that makes it impossible for me to recommend Ms. Casey for a permanent position . . .”
What?
My heart stops, and a roaring in my ears blocks out everything else.
A stinging sensation starts at my chest, spreading through my limbs.
Did I think being on trial in front of the likes of Mr. Strong and Mrs. Beaufort was my worst nightmare?
I was wrong. This is. Sawyer taking me in, letting me fall for him, only to blast me like this.
He let me believe I was worth loving, that Blue Ridge was somewhere I could belong. But here he is, doing it all over again, saving face by putting me down.
Tears fill my eyes as I hurry for the door. I’m taking the steps two at a time when a shock of understanding, overwhelming in its intensity, forces me to stop, nearly doubling over.
This instinct to flee has controlled me my entire life.
It had me dashing down those big, marble steps of Everett Academy.
It had me leaving Blue Ridge behind all those years ago.
It had me running away from prom.
It kept me from relationships, and love, and happiness.
And I’m doing it all over gain, reverting to the same instinct.
Not anymore.
I know Sawyer. He wouldn’t do that to me, not again. Instead of assuming the worst from the tiny snippet I heard, I need to talk to him.
Whirling around, I stomp up the steps and into the building.
Sawyer’s coming out of the meeting room. When he spots me, emotion spills over his face in waves. Relief, concern, love.
His arms open to me, and I fill them without hesitation.
“I didn’t know,” he says. “I wouldn’t have let you come alone if I knew what this was.”
“It was bad,” I tell him.
His brows pinch. “I know. I was just in there.”
I can’t help asking, “What’d you tell them?” Heart pounding, I add, “I heard you say you couldn’t recommend me.”
He nods. “I told them that as principal, I couldn’t recommend you. I was up front about our relationship, which is a conflict of interest.”
Warmth spreads in my chest. Of course he was, because he’s never tried to hide me.
His arms circle my waist. “I also told them they’d be foolish not to do everything in their power to keep you. That you’re one of the most passionate teachers I’ve ever seen. You’re great at what you do, and the parents and students love you.”
I give him a sad smile. “I’m still not getting the job.”
He rubs the back of his neck. “It’s that busybody, Beaufort. She saw us that day and got to my dad. But we can figure this out. This isn’t how public schools should be run. We can fight it.”
I look up at him. “You sound confident.”
He grins down at me. “I’m the Prince of Blue Ridge. Might as well wield that power for good.”
Laughing into his chest, I notice his tie for the first time, red with adorable mice and cheese. How could I have ever doubted him?
The door to the meeting room creaks open, and we turn to see his dad walking out. “Sawyer, I’m not done with you.”
With his arm slung over my shoulders, Sawyer turns us away without a word.
“Sawyer,” his dad says, warning in his tone.
My boyfriend guides us to the door, and we step into the sunshine together.
“Why do you have Will’s car?” I ask.
Mr. Strong’s voice bellows Sawyer’s name from behind us.
Sawyer says, “I’ll tell you at home, honey.”