Chapter 16 #3
“Did you want some ice cream?” I ask her.
“Oh! Is there any left?” she asks.
I glance at the ice cream tub. “Maybe? I think we can manage part of a scoop, anyway? No charge, since I’m not sure. Is that not what you wanted?”
“I mean, yes,” she admits, “but I didn’t... I didn’t expect there to be any left.”
Then why was she here?
“Oh, hi, Sunani,” Teren says, his voice forcibly lighter.
It takes me a moment to realize I’ve heard the name—the cobbler said he was going back to her. But she must be half his age, so she’s not the wife I assumed he meant. I hope.
Teren says, “I’m sorry, I should have thought to ask if I could bring you any.”
Sunani smiles.
Wow.
Teren, to his credit, just blinks a couple times.
Maybe the effect is lessened if you’re around her more.
“It’s not your job to abandon your own work because I don’t like crowds,” she tells him.
Oh, that’s what she didn’t quite say earlier.
If everyone reacts to her like they’ve been struck across the face with a magical backlash, I can see why.
“What were you working on today?” Teren asks, not actually agreeing with her.
I exchange a glance with Zan, who looks back at me with some amusement.
Aha.
I dig around the edges of the tub and listen intently.
“Another boot painting,” Sunani says. “Apparently one of them actually sold—”
“What?” I gasp, my head shooting up.
Teren smacks his forehead. “Of course! I didn’t think you might want to see them.”
It’s Sunani’s turn to blink. “What?”
I hike my leg up onto the table and point at my boot. “You made these?!”
Teren mutters, “How are you this flexible.”
I wave him off. “You’ll be more flexible too once you start actually doing your exercises.”
“Hey, how can you tell—”
I roll my eyes. “You’re not moving like a person who’s sore, are you?”
I look back at Sunani expectantly, who has gone from staring at my foot in surprise to smiling a little.
“Haben makes the boots, but I painted them,” Sunani admits.
Ha! I knew it.
“But given the price, I never really thought—”
“Don’t tell her,” Zan says sharply.
I put my boot down and level an accusing finger at him again.
He crosses his arms. “My resources are mine to spend how I choose.”
“And I can punch you any time I want,” I remind him in turn.
Zan’s lips curve.
Teren says dryly to Sunani, “They’re always like this.”
“I see,” she says faintly.
“Sunani is a painter,” Teren explains to me. “She’s been experimenting with different mediums lately.”
I finish getting Sunani her ice cream.
“Your work is stunning,” I tell her seriously. “I haven’t seen much of it yet, but maybe another day I can come see more?”
She takes a bite, and her whole face relaxes with pleasure.
I steal a glance at Teren and see him swallow, his entire being fixed on Sunani.
As I feel Zan’s presence behind me like a fire licking at my soul, I think I may have an idea of what it would cost Teren to leave Crystal Hollow.
“Wow, this really is incredible,” Sunani marvels. Her whole being has lit up, making her somehow even more entrancing than before. For Teren’s sake, I really, really hope she’s as nice as she seems. “And you’re sure your ice supply is stable?”
“Yes, very sure—” I start, the same way I have many other times today.
But Teren says slowly, “You don’t mean just the quantity, do you? You mean the price.”
I’m glad his brain still works around her.
“Yes,” Sunani agrees quietly. “People are worried about what your ice supply means for the rest of us—if there will be less ice come next year, or if the prices will change. That’s—that’s actually what I wanted to tell you.
Since you all were so busy, and since you were in the middle of it, Teren, I wasn’t sure if you would have heard.
.. some of what you’re going to have to contend with. ”
Is she trying to help, or to scare me away? “Which is?” I ask sharply.
She flinches.
“Yora—” Teren starts.
“It’s fine, Teren.” Sunani meets my gaze. “People are worried you’re wasting ice—our ice—on frivolities. And that we’re going to pay the price.”
“Are you worried?” Zan asks.
Mildly.
Dangerously.
Teren freezes.
But Sunani just shakes her head. “No. Teren is with you. I know he cares about the people of Crystal Hollow.”
She steals a glance at him, the barest of flushes creeping into her cheeks, then back to me.
Well, well.
I wish I could revel in my amusement that they don’t seem to know they both like each other.
I wish I could promise that my selling ice cream won’t bite Crystal Hollow in the end, but obviously I can’t.
Zan and I could probably manage to supply them with ice in the future, but if my presence here causes political problems, I can’t supply everything they get from the mainland.
But more than anything, “frivolities” has unlocked something in me.
Is ice cream frivolous? Maybe. I certainly survived before I tasted it.
But did I live?
Don’t we all deserve to have more than simply what is necessary for literal survival?
Don’t we all, sages and dragons and normal, extraordinary humans alike, deserve to have joy?
“Is there a way I can reassure people about the ice?” I ask Sunani.
She nods. “There’s a town hall this afternoon. Do you want to come?”
At least she didn’t say “are you ready,” even if the meaning is the same.
And now I think I know why Sunani is really here, and why else she waited to approach me.
This is a woman who is very aware of how people see her, and how that shapes her reality. She may be sweet, but she’s not stupid. I think she is, actually, trying to help—all because Teren sat next to me today.
No, obviously I don’t want to go talk to yet more humans that I don’t know and try to justify my existence to them; try to make them feel safe around me.
They’re not safe.
But on the other hand: Freedom, for me, means the possibility of joy.
Ice cream is a declaration.
Of my intent; and, maybe, of how I am going to fight.
I look at Zan beside me.
We don’t exchange words, but I feel them all the same.
Today, he’s still with me.
I turn back to Sunani and say, “Yes.”